Pre-existing tummy & preggo bloat...I look more pregnant than I am! :(

mrsdela27 · July 2016

Hey ladies! I'm 14 weeks pregnant with my first baby (a girl!) and my husband and I are over the moon with excitement. Here's my question -- for many years I've had a tummy (I'm sure I'm not alone here) and have never been able to get rid of it. I hold most of my weigh gain in my belly area. I know bloat is normal during pregnancy, but baby is still so small and my tummy looks huge! I look about 6 months pregnant. Everyone wants to touch my belly and I have to tell them that the baby isn't even "there" yet and they think I'm just being silly! Anyone have this same problem? I'm just really uncomfortable and have been fine dealing with my belly up until this point, but now I hate the way it makes me feel because it isn't even my baby girl...just fat! Advice? Anything? Lol thanks for anyone's help!

Dinozaur · July 2016

I gain my weight in my stomach as well, it is SO difficult to try and keep it at a minimum. With the bloating and all, I totally feel you on this...when I was about 9 weeks, a friend said, "wow, you already have a baby bump!!" And I had to be like, "no....not at all, actually..." I'm trying to wear loose clothing for right now to make it not as obvious. If it's any consolation, a LOT of it is most likely bloat. I was feeling pretty crappy and then the other morning, I somehow woke up without the bloating and it didn't look nearly as big. It's back now, of course, but it helps to know that so much of it is just my body's reaction rather than the insane amount of carbs morning sickness has forced me to eat.

ceclarlinetlo · July 2016

I also have a very round belly right now - it toally feels like false advertising but what can we do? I've decided to just enjoy looking cute without being uncomfortable.

mrsdela27 · July 2016

My friend said I look cute and I can totally play the preggo card even though I'm not far along lol. How many weeks are you?

ceclarlinetlo · July 2016

I'll be 14 on Sunday

mrsdela27 · July 2016

I'm in my 14th week

due January 4th (my wedding anniversary!) congrats to you! do you know what you're having yet?

mrsdela27 · July 2016

Dinozaur said:

I gain my weight in my stomach as well, it is SO difficult to try and keep it at a minimum. With the bloating and all, I totally feel you on this...when I was about 9 weeks, a friend said, "wow, you already have a baby bump!!" And I had to be like, "no....not at all, actually..." I'm trying to wear loose clothing for right now to make it not as obvious. If it's any consolation, a LOT of it is most likely bloat. I was feeling pretty crappy and then the other morning, I somehow woke up without the bloating and it didn't look nearly as big. It's back now, of course, but it helps to know that so much of it is just my body's reaction rather than the insane amount of carbs morning sickness has forced me to eat.

You're just like me! I've had to eat a ton of carbs to curb the morning sickness and I guess in turn that has contributed to my bloat. I've been trying to wear loose clothes as well but sometimes I can't with work and all. My next solution is to cave and buy maternity pants lol. Any advice on how to curb the bloat a bit? I want tons of carbs and salty foods so that definitely doesn't help!

Teach123 · July 2016

Yep, I carry weight in my belly too. I don't look super pregnant yet, but I can tell people I know are starting to give me a second glance, like what's going on there. I'm not going to be able to keep it a secret much longer. I just look way thicker through the middle. I'm sure mine in partly bloat too, but I don't know how to fix it. I feel like the more I wear looser clothes the bigger I look too. Yuck.

spano41 · July 2016

I definitely still had a little belly from my last pregnancy before getting pregnant this time. I just try to either embrace it or hide it. Like wear tight t shirts or really flowy blouses, but not much in between because then I just look fat. You also have to remember that it's not just baby in there, it's also uterus and placenta, so we are getting to the point where people can really start showing. As far as people touching your belly, I would just say you prefer for them to not touch. No explanation needed!

Dinozaur · July 2016

@mrsdela27 So some things that could potentially help with the bloating would be drinking more water, getting exercise (don't know about you but still difficult for me due to ms), trying to eat more fiber, eating/drinking things with ginger, and I've also heard in the past (somewhere?) that putting something like slices of lemon or cucumber in your water can help as well. One of the main things causing it though is the increase in progesterone, and there's just not a whole lot we can do about that :P

sparklythingsmn · July 2016

Yup I had a little extra lurking. My mom was convinced that I was further along... No mom... I'm just a little fluffy around the middle

. And I can't do any cardio/walking for at least a month because I might have a broken bone in my foot.

Doctor said he will not do an Xray because I am pregnant. Love'n this bump and boot life

Basically, you are super not alone

Knottie1443924966 · July 2016

Do you find that you tummy is rounder at night?

That's when I feel my bloat rolling in

last time I lost a lot of weight but didn't have enough energy to exercise I just forced myself to drink 64ounces of water plus tea, coffee but the water had to be 64ounces. Basically I filled up my 32 ounce bottle twice.

sagoon · July 2016

I am in this camp as well. In the mornings I have a cute, week-appropriate baby bump. In the evenings, I look like I'm 22 weeks pregnant. It's all bloat/cookies, but I sure could do without it.

TinaBelcher · July 2016

This is one of my biggest pet peeves with society. Human women do NOT normally have perfectly flat bellies! Our hormones and biology tend to help us be softer and sometimes rounder than what the ::many swear words:: magazines show us making us feel inadequate about our natural, beautiful bodies.

Fuck society!! Rock those bellies!!! It's perfectly natural and was a beauty ideal for all of history until just 30 or 40 years ago! You guys are growing babies, don't feel ashamed of your bodies for even a second! I'm 15w with twins and showing big time. People try to touch me and I don't allow it, except for family. They touch the top of my belly where it's still just intestines (babies are working their way up) but whatever- my bloat, my intestines, my fat, whatever it is it wouldn't be shaped like this without these babies I'm literally making right now so I'm cool with it. Try your hardest to be easy on yourselves because we're all going to get a LOT bigger and you don't want to start this journey with a growing complex about it or anything!!

ETA I don't mean to make it sound like I never have twinges of doubt or uneasiness about my body because hell yes I do, but I try hard to squash it and just keep going

KarliQ88 · July 2016

Tell them it's just gas and fat and no baby yet. They'll shut up and no further questions asked.

I dont let anyone touch my belly except my husband and my doctor for medical reasons. It's barley even there though and im 14.5w with my 1st so I'm not speaking from experience.

Dinozaur · July 2016

@TinaBelcher I do completely agree with you on this, and society should really just go suck a big one, I love seeing photos and such from the past but portraying the softer look. I think before I realized how much it was all bloat, I was concerned on a health level, like I thought I was gaining a bunch of extra stomach fat from having way too unhealthy of a lifestyle throughout first tri. Healthy eating and fitness is stressed all the time for pregnant women, and I guess I felt guilty about my lack of exercise and aversion to vegetables, and thought my stomach was showing all of that. Now I do still wear loose clothing, but that's because a lot of people still don't know about the pregnancy yet. But yes, as a body image thing, we definitely should not have to feel bad for being soft and round.

LoneStar21416 · July 2016

I struggle with this too. Mostly because my workout routine drastically changed in the first trimester. Sort of like @dinozaur said, for me, I felt (sometimes still feel) like my stomach just lost all of its tone and I just felt gross and unhealthy. I think I said in another post before that I just felt like I just all of my core strength. I still don't really know if it's because my workout routine changed, or if it's simply because I am so much more bloated and things are moving and shifting, and a small bump is there. It felt like legitimate fat to me, which I really don't think it could/can be. I've still only gained about 3 lbs (15 weeks tomorrow).

For me, and I would assume for many other FTMs, it's just a new experience to see your body changing and it's difficult to disassociate that with weight gain or loss of muscle because we've never been through this before. And like you said, we don't have a noticeable bump right now! I think your feelings are common and very valid. But like many PPs said, none of the changes would be happening if we weren't growing humans inside of us, so it's all good! I keep reminding myself that I just want a healthy, growing baby, and the rest of it I will deal with.

LCartee2016 · July 2016

Yeah, I've always had a tummy (they call it an "apron" in the weight loss surgery community

) and even though I've lost over a hundred pounds, I'm still about a size 18 (pre-pregnancy). So, although I'm only 14.5 weeks along, I feel like I look much further. Honestly, I got tired of stressing myself out over how far along I looked, so I decided to just roll with it and dress up my bump/blump. Healthier mind-frame for mommy=healthier growing environment for baby.

Also, maternity clothes are hella comfy.

mommywesley · July 2016

This is my 5th pregnancy and I look like I'm 6months along vs 13.5weeks...I always got big really fast with my pregnancies! The comments are annoying though

Teach123 · July 2016

Yeah, I had a pedicure yesterday. The nail lady was trying to make conversation. She asked me about if I had children. I told her yes, one and one on the way. She then proceeded to pat my belly. I was like woman you are patting my fat. I wanted to karate chop her hand. Lol

Knottie1443924966 · July 2016

@LCartee2016 wow congrats on the weightloss. Over 100 lbs must have taken a lot of dedication.

The truth is yes society urges us to be super thin etc and it's over kill.

But honestly I feel the best when I am lean not thin but lean. I tend to have more energy and have a clearer mind. Many pregnant women have worked on staying lean throughout their pregnancies and have faster labours.

My goal now that I'm in the second trimester is to make conscious food choices (eat plentiful but ofcourse to choose the right foods), workout as much as I can and drink over 64ounces of water.

I want to be healthy and have the energy my baby will need from me. I want to have a fast delivery by building strength in my abdomen again.

If society would promote lean healthy bodies instead of thin anorexic ones we wouldn't have this need to rebel. I don't think it's OK to have extra blub (for me) I don't eat meat so my blub would either comes from high processed food, fried food or refined sugar. No OK (for me) those foods make me feel lethargic.

I hope we can encourage one another to keep our bodies healthy, not chubby not extremely thin but healthy. For our health and the health of our babies. We need positive reinforcement not complacency.

We will get bigger and stronger. And we need to build muscle in our legs and back to support our growing bellies. All our bodies are different. But we can not "eat for two" or indulge bc "what... I'm pregnant"

By the way I am totally saying this from my heart.

moosette113 · July 2016

@Knottie1443924966 I'm sure this wasn't your intention, but your positive reinforcement comes across more as a lecture than support, even though you were "saying this from (your) heart". It just seems a little tone deaf to come into a thread where people were discussing insecurities surrounding weight and body image to tell everyone how pregnant women need to be building muscle and eating properly. Again, I'm sure it wasn't your intention and you are of course entitled to your opinions, but it seemed like the wrong place/time.

KarliQ88 · July 2016

Ok. So....at work last night i was talking to one of my best friends about my pregnancy as her and her husband are soon starting their journey TTC. We were over heard and cat is out if the bag at work. My other coworker was like "you know. When you were just helping me i couldn't help but wonder." as she patted her chest and belly.
I've known my breasts have gotten bigger but my "bump" i felt was only noticeable without a shirt on. I wear scrubs at work. If i can't hide behind my scrubs it has to be obvious in normal clothes. Maybe im in denial because i don't want to get big (have a child yes). I blame it on gas or tacos but it hit me last night. It's my bump!! I'm just under 15w. I'm short and small framed so this had to be a given.
Anyway done with that rant. I'm meeting my beat friend out tonight i can always count on her for an honest opinion.

BriannaE129129 · July 2016

I've always had skinnier arms and legs but my middle has never and will never resemble anything close to a six pack! On the 4th of July we were with family and our beach and I had on my regular bikini and my cousin was like aww look at that little baby bump... in front of everyone. I was like honestly... this is just the same fat I had BEFORE i got pregnant but thank you. I've lost weight since getting pregnant and haven't put any more on, i know it's just fat. So please cut it out with the touching! Not a fan, or at least not yet!

Smiley-1980 · July 2016

Yeah being my second pregnancy I am definitely showing pretty early. If people comment I point to the bottom and say `this is the baby` then point to the top and say ` this is just fat` that usually gets a laugh and stops the conversation. My one co-worker always asks if I`m sure it`s not twins... I just brush her off cause she`s old lol.

sarahmsoda · July 2016

Last time I saw my OB she thought I was 18 weeks based on size and positioning ...I am either carrying super high or just big for 14 weeks haha. I am fairly average weight but I feel I look like 20 weeks pregnant too cause all my extra weight was always in my middle

emcollins3 · July 2016

If I had a dollar for every time I literally want to reach through my computer screen and hug each of you, haha. Amen to this thread! No matter where my weight has gone, I have always carried a bit of extra fun in my tummy area. The smallest I ever got in my life was a size 4 and someone congratulated me on being pregnant then, sooo yeah. Definitely NOT a size 4 now, but that moment helped me to realize that's just how my body is built and so then it made me a tad (just a tad) less defensive when at bigger sizes, people would look at me like I was pregnant when I wasn't. So now that I actually am pregnant, I am definitely rocking the blump for sure. I'm 11 weeks and it was about 2 weeks ago that my husband said, I can tell you are pregnant now. It's our first and he said it with a huge smile because he was excited, but of course I was like ummm well that's great that I do, but that's just my spare tire babe. However this weekend, as I tugged the flowiest shirt I own over the shorts that suddenly seem barely able to button this week, I felt myself thinking SO WHAT? You ARE pregnant. You ARE growing a tiny human. And your body IS changing. And whether it's the 5 weeks of mashed potatoes and other carbs, not having had the energy to think about putting my running shoes on, hormones flooding my body, or otherwise - this is how you look at this moment right now and that's okay. And it's beautiful what my body is doing now, even if I feel anything but. I will always struggle with my body image but I have been trying to make a conscious decision not to let myself say empty comments to myself or obsess over it because I do not want to set that example for our child, especially if we have a girl. So I gave myself a little talking to this weekend and reminded myself that starts now! Of course, way easier said (or thought of at that moment) than done and I had a meltdown this morning when the "loose" pants I had picked out were tight...but then I checked our board and found this thread, so it's all good. Thank goodness for this community so we can remind ourselves that (a) we're not alone in this, (b) our bodies are strong, beautiful, and unique - AND designed to do this, and (c) we may all need this t-shirt in our wardrobes going forward!!!

KarliQ88 · July 2016

My husband too said "i can tell your pregnant now" i grabbed a fat roll and said "this!!!!! Is not a baby." it's like once people know they immediately start looking at you and your body and pointing things out. So its ok to say things about my body because im pregnant? Nobody has ever pointed out a fat roll and said "awww look how cute it is" I'm not that big either but like alot of women i dont have washboard abs and have rolls when i sit or bend

christac1010 · July 2016

A lot of people here are making great points! It's hard to remember that our bodies are changing for such an amazing reason. My bump is BIG and I'm carrying high. I couldn't even buckle my sandals the other day and it led to a complete meltdown about being fat. DH was so appalled that I would ever say such a thing about myself during this time in our lives. Hearing him tell me how amazing it is that I'm growing our child and how he's more attracted to me than ever really helped me feel better.

Our hormones are going crazy and our lives are changing. It's nearly impossible not to overthink everything. But I'm glad we have friends, family, and this lovely group of women on the boards to build each other up when we can't do it ourselves!

Carly79 · July 2016

I'm in the same boat. I've decided to embrace it and not try to downplay the pregnant look. It is what it is. People just need to learn to be respectful of a woman's body, I get so tired of hearing stories like this (and ran in to my fair share during my first pregnancy). Maternity clothes are comfortable, and being pregnant is one time I'm comfortable with clothes that may be a little tight around the midsection so I'm going to enjoy it. I know it's mainly fat but if the little tiny bump that would be forming if not for my belling is causing my fat to appear like a baby belly more power to it

Ali Grindell · July 2016

I developed a belly really quickly also. I imagined it was mainly bloat. It felt like the belly came out nowhere and I did my best to cover it with flowy tops. I got tired of being uncomfortable and just bought a couple maternity outfits and embraced the belly. People did think I was further along than I was but I would either just answer or ignore the question and keep it moving. Didn't give people time for a response. Now that I'm in my 2nd trimester, the bloat seems to be going down. I say embrace the belly and be comfortable!

Knottie1443924966 · July 2016

@moosette113 omg your kidding me right? Reread my message in a kind happy tone. It'll sound different to you

Knottie1443924966 · July 2016

@moosette113 omg your kidding me right? Reread my message in a kind happy tone. It'll sound different to you

JaysMomma · July 2016

Can I join the club? I'm 12 weeks and look 20. I feel like everyone is noticing. My husband said I look pregnant now and my grandmother insists I'm having twins. I am way bigger than my last time around, but always carry a pouch, even at my smallest weight. I have decided to embrace it on the weekends and wear loose clothes to work during the week. I am telling my coworkers on Friday because I'm sick of hiding my blump, I'm ready to set it free! We need to embrace and love our beautiful growing bellies, even if it's Mac and cheese.

PS I ate Mac and cheese for dinner with my two year old, totally felt like a kid and loved every bite!

newyearsbaby5 · July 2016

Total lurker here posting for the first time. I guess I'm stressing about the opposite thing. In no way am I someone with washboard abs, but I'm pretty fit (or, at least was before the 1st trimester sucked the life out of me), and I'm more concerned with the fact of my total lack of bump. I'm 15w+2 and the baby measured perfectly at my 12w ultrasound. You all post these pics each week and the bumps are so cute, but I have nothing. Sometimes my stomach seems a little bloated in the evening, but I attribute that to my horrible diet the last two months that used to be filled with kale and quinoa. Someone who is a STM and started showing late the first time, make me feel better? My husband says that I'll be laughing about this in a month or so when I'll be longing for the days of a small stomach. I guess it just worries me that there isn't actually a baby inside of me--even though I know there is--since I can't feel anything or see anything different.

mommywesley · July 2016

@newyearsbaby5 I wasn't one to show late, but I know own multiple women who did and most of them were "fit" moms. Try not to stress too much about it! They didn't start showing till like week 20 or so and staid pretty small through their entire pregnancy. Lots of women carry differently!

newyearsbaby5 · July 2016

@mommywesley thank you! that makes me feel a bit better.

raeishavingababy · July 2016

I am in the same boat! I used to be average weight until I got into nursing school in 2010. Then I was in a bad accident last year and was in a wheelchair for half a year and being sedentary, I gained a little more weight. I had a tummy, but I never thought of it as that bad. Now that I am pregnant and bloated, even as early as like 5 weeks I looked like I was much further along! My MIL thinks I'm having twins even though we've seen only 1 baby and heard 1 heartbeat so far. I'm 11 weeks now and my next appointment is tomorrow lol at least DH is super supportive :]

Mylitta · July 2016

@newyearsbaby5 If you look up average time to start showing 'they' say 16-20 weeks. So that sounds about right. I'm barely showing anything (only 12w), and what I am is mostly my fat/bump pushed up. I can tell I'm "fuller" down very low/ pant line area, but the rest was there before. With what day I normally carry in my stomach you can't see it with clothes on... if anything changed it looks like I've just eaten a big lunch. That's it.

Plus many women carry differently. I've seen ladies at 7 months look maybe 5 months. Just depends... It means nothing so long as your baby is healthy.

Carly79 · July 2016

There was a story going around facebook about a gymnast or trainer from Australia who posted a pic of her and a friend of hers that were only a few weeks a part and the difference in how each woman carried their babies was amazing. She posted it to show how different pregnancy is for different women (and unfortunately caught a lot of flack for it because that's not what people noticed). It's so hard not to compare ourselves to other pregnant women, especially when other people around us are taking care of that task and being sure we know it. I often wish I were a little more outspoken and could come up with comebacks quickly because I'd like to have something snarky to say when someone asks me if I'm sure it's not twins or tells me the baby is going to be huge, or if I'm sure I'm only 14 weeks but I don't. And I try not to dwell on it, usually just say no, every woman is different and move on.

Mylitta · July 2016

You mean this one. I thought about this! Sorry it's huge. I'm mobile!

Pre-existing tummy & preggo bloat...I look more pregnant than I am! :(

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