Who holds baby first?

Jmedeiros24 · June 2016

So my husband and I are expecting our first child. This is also the first grandchild on both sides. It's crazy that I even need to think about this but after birth my husband and I will obviously be the first ones to hold her but who gets to hold her next, my mom or his mom? I feel like whoever she doesn't go to first is going to be offended. I should add that the mothers don't necessarily care for each other but they act cordial when on the same space. Advice?

ballofmeat · June 2016

https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12677585/who-will-meet-baby-first/p1

amarfeo17 · June 2016

Oh boy this sounds like a toughie. Will your mother be at the hospital and with you during the labor? My mom is going to be supporting me during the labor along with my husband, it will be nice to have her to comfort me and this way it gives my husband time to take breaks. His mom will make her way to the hospital shortly after the baby is born, depending on the time of day. So I figure my mom will get her first. This is also my moms first grandchild, my MIL has a grandson already. Definitely a lot to consider

Jmedeiros24 · June 2016

I'm only allowing my husband to be in the room with me during delivery. I know both moms are going to want to be in the waiting room (which gives me anxiety) I really would like at least a couple hours without any visitors but I feel bad telling the parents that because they are both so excited. I think it is going to come down to rock, paper, scissors lol.

charmedlifex3 · June 2016

If it were me, I would ask the hospital to "only allow" on in the room at a time, and let THEM duke it out in the waiting room. If a nurse is the one to tell them one at a time, they'll have to be grownups and sort it themselves, and then the pressure is totally off of you to pick. I'm sure your labor and delivery nurse would be willing to put a "one at a time for the first xx amount of time" restriction in place at your request, and be willing to communicate it to your family on you behalf. Make her the "bad guy" - she never has to see these people again, you do!

My hospital doesn't allow anyone in the room for the first two hours after birth, so I'd check... maybe you have an easy out because of hospital policy - lol!

Jmedeiros24 · June 2016

That is a great idea. I hope my hospital has a similar policy, I will have to look into it!

NBphotogirl · June 2016

I am not planning on having anyone else at the hospital other than my husband. Once we have settled in, we will invite people up. I am not interested in having a ton of people there right after. I know that my mom will have a hard time staying away, but I think they will respect our wishes.

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