Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Beta Testing May 15-28
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
@elisam511 FX and GL
*BFP Mentioned*
Official BETA results today 243
EDD 2/4/17 - TWINS- MC July
FET#2- 11/9/16 BFP- MC
FET#3- 2/8/17 BFP- MC
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Hi all, I was away for work the last several days and unable to check in but I got my BFP on Sunday! Beta #1 was 100 and #2 was 298! Congrats to all those that also go BFPs!
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
***TW****MC mentioned & BFP mentioned***
TTC#1 since July 2014
AMH 0.1, DOR, Poor responder
Moved to Prague, Czech Republic for IVF
DE attempt in Czech Republic!!
March trip to Prague canceled due to Pancreatitis.
Headed to Prague April 30
3 different donors resulted in 1 PGS tested embryo and 1 fresh embryo
BFP on 5/15/16 at 5dp5dt
My blog: www.wearethehammitts.blogspot.com
@Jdonegan congrats!
Me: Endo, PCOS,
DH: low life span and mobility
Married and TTC since 12/2008
3 IUI's in 2012
IVF #1 BFN 08/2012
IVF #2 11/2012 Twin Girls born at 35wks 7/2013
ER 4/2016 Freeze all 11 embryo's
FET #1 5/2016 Transfer 1 BFN
FET #2 7/2016 Transfer 1 BFN
FET #3 09/2016 Thawed 3 Transfered 1 CP
FET #4 1/2017 Transfer 2 CP
FET #5 April 24, 2017 Transfering 1 BFN
FET #6 June 8, 2017 Transfer 2 Beta #1 721 Beta #2 1363
US on 7/5 1 baby found EDD 2/24/18
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL!
E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
TI - 0 BFPs of 7 attempts (0% success)
IUI - 0 BFPs of 8 attempts (0% success)
IVF/FET - 9 BFPs of 14 attempts (64% success)
Diagnosed with unexplained infertility
IUI #1- April '16 - BFN
IUI #2 - May '16 - BFN
IVF Fresh Xfer #1 (1 blastocyst) - Sept '16 - BFN
FET #2 - 11/8/16 (2 blastocysts) - Beta on 11/18
4 more blastocysts on ice
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Diagnosed with unexplained infertility
IUI #1- April '16 - BFN
IUI #2 - May '16 - BFN
IVF Fresh Xfer #1 (1 blastocyst) - Sept '16 - BFN
FET #2 - 11/8/16 (2 blastocysts) - Beta on 11/18
4 more blastocysts on ice
We did have a brief scare where the financial dept at our clinic said that they knew our insurance very well and we needed to have 3 IUI's before IVF, and thankfully she was nice and checked that again and NOPE, no 3 requirement so we are cleared 100% to go forward now! IF this iui doesnt work! We had a crappy sample so Im pretty confident well be moving into IVF very soon!
Married March 2012
TTC #1 since 2012
May 7, 2016: IUI#1 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
June 6, 2016: IUI #2 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
IVF Consult 1 & 2: June 10, 2016 / July 15, 2016
Started Stims: July 15, 2016 (Lupron, Gonal-F, and Menopur)
Trigger ----> 08/03 ----> ER on 08/05 ----> Transfer ------> 08/10
BETA 1 (8/22) - 401 - BETA 2 (8/24) - 541 - BETA 3 (8/26) - 913
Baby Chadwell's First U/S: 09/06/2016 / EDD: 04/28/2017
Diagnosed with unexplained infertility
IUI #1- April '16 - BFN
IUI #2 - May '16 - BFN
IVF Fresh Xfer #1 (1 blastocyst) - Sept '16 - BFN
FET #2 - 11/8/16 (2 blastocysts) - Beta on 11/18
4 more blastocysts on ice
I would definitely check with the clinic though! Be proactive and have it done before your consult for sure!
Here is a little excerpt about what my clinic sent me this morning regarding IVF coverage:
"I did heard back from the case management department with BCBS of MASS and they’ve confirmed BCBS of Mass did change their requirements. In the past, BCBS of MASS required multiple rounds of failed IUI treatment before proceeding with IVF. They now require women under 35 to have attempted pregnancy for 12 months and women 35 and older to have attempted pregnancy for 6 months. Dr. Sipe’s notes indicate you’ve been attempting pregnancy for well over that, based on his notes I expect IVF treatment will be approved. When you have your IVF consultation with Dr. Sipe he will mention a procedure called ICSI and will explain if he recommends the service for you. BCBS of Mass will authorization ICSI if there is a male factor issue and we have 2 or more semen analysis on file documenting the issue. Assisted Hatching is a procedure that is only approved by BCBS OF MASS with 3 or more failures to implant after an embryo transfer is completed. FCI will honor the reduced insurance rate of $1750 for the ICSI and $300 for the assisted hatching, if recommended by Dr. Sipe and you agree to have procedures completed. FCI will ask for credit card information to proceed with these services. BCBS states IVF is a covered service payable at 100% after you’ve met your $2000 deductible. They show you’ve met your deductible for the year, a $20 MD co-pay does apply. The following services are optional and aren’t covered by insurance, embryo freezing = $1200, annual storage is $500, sperm freezing = $500, annual storage is $500, Biopsy of embryos for Genetic testing = $2200, PGD/PGS testing = payable to the genetic lab selected, you must contact them directly to verify cost."
Married March 2012
TTC #1 since 2012
May 7, 2016: IUI#1 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
June 6, 2016: IUI #2 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
IVF Consult 1 & 2: June 10, 2016 / July 15, 2016
Started Stims: July 15, 2016 (Lupron, Gonal-F, and Menopur)
Trigger ----> 08/03 ----> ER on 08/05 ----> Transfer ------> 08/10
BETA 1 (8/22) - 401 - BETA 2 (8/24) - 541 - BETA 3 (8/26) - 913
Baby Chadwell's First U/S: 09/06/2016 / EDD: 04/28/2017
@Monica54321 FX you won't have to do a 3rd IUI before IVF. That was awful what you had to go through
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
and thank you, Im not to positive for this one, last time we have 68mil or so and 96% motility post wash and it didnt work! This time because we used the frozen sample we only had 7.9mil and 76% motility post wash so a huge difference in my eyes! But im glad we got rid of that crappy sample now instead of using it later! The nurse did do things a little differently this time and Im eating my pineapple so well see
Married March 2012
TTC #1 since 2012
May 7, 2016: IUI#1 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
June 6, 2016: IUI #2 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
IVF Consult 1 & 2: June 10, 2016 / July 15, 2016
Started Stims: July 15, 2016 (Lupron, Gonal-F, and Menopur)
Trigger ----> 08/03 ----> ER on 08/05 ----> Transfer ------> 08/10
BETA 1 (8/22) - 401 - BETA 2 (8/24) - 541 - BETA 3 (8/26) - 913
Baby Chadwell's First U/S: 09/06/2016 / EDD: 04/28/2017
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Luckily for me work is super busy so im just hoping this 2ww flies by
Married March 2012
TTC #1 since 2012
May 7, 2016: IUI#1 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
June 6, 2016: IUI #2 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
IVF Consult 1 & 2: June 10, 2016 / July 15, 2016
Started Stims: July 15, 2016 (Lupron, Gonal-F, and Menopur)
Trigger ----> 08/03 ----> ER on 08/05 ----> Transfer ------> 08/10
BETA 1 (8/22) - 401 - BETA 2 (8/24) - 541 - BETA 3 (8/26) - 913
Baby Chadwell's First U/S: 09/06/2016 / EDD: 04/28/2017
In my personal opinion, the actual IUI procedure was not bad at all - it felt like a normal pap. Why was I so tired afterward that evening?
What was your experience in each of the IUI's you did?
DH: 41
Married 10/25/2014 / TTC since 05/2015
1st IUI 05/05/16 Letrozole 7.5 mg CD 3-11 + Ovidrel = BFN
2nd cycle on Letrozole 7.5 mg CD 3-11 + TI = BFN
3rd cycle on Letrozole but did our 2nd IUI on 07/01/16. 10 mg CD 3-11 + Ovidrel = BFN
Onto IVF! Started Lupron on 09/24. Added Gonal F and hcg injections 09/26...... Trigger 10/07. EggRetrieval 10/09. Starting PIO, Estrace, and Medrol 10/10/16. Transferred 2 "strong/beautiful" embryos 10/14/16. Beta 10/28/16 = 998 mIU/mL = BFP with one baby, but miscarried at 9w5d.
D&C on 12/06/17 and started taking BCPs 01/10/17 for the next IVF Cycle, which officially began stims on 02/18/17.
Fast Forward: we got 4 fertilized embryos from that cycle. Transferred one fresh, but it did not stick, so we have 3 frozen embryos currently. Went in to the fertility clinic in July to talk about a FET of one of those three frozen embryos, but a new fibroid was discovered, and I was not cleared to do the transfer until I had fibroid removal surgery.
08/11/17 had a mini-laparotomy / myomectomy to remove 6 fibroids, largest sized were the size of golf-balls! Once we were cleared to go about our normal lives (sex!) I got pregnant NATURALLY but it was a chemical pregnancy. The very next month we had another BFP and here we are now with a baby on the way! A TOTAL AND COMPLETE MIRACLE!
Watch our YouTube Channel Vlog Here!
This stems from the same thought from when we first started TTC... my obgyn told me that if we wanted to go straight to a fertiility clinic, we could! They didn't "make us wait" the full year before getting help from a RE. Which is great....
So now I'm wondering, why do you think the RE wants us to do 3 IUI's before going into IVF?
DH: 41
Married 10/25/2014 / TTC since 05/2015
1st IUI 05/05/16 Letrozole 7.5 mg CD 3-11 + Ovidrel = BFN
2nd cycle on Letrozole 7.5 mg CD 3-11 + TI = BFN
3rd cycle on Letrozole but did our 2nd IUI on 07/01/16. 10 mg CD 3-11 + Ovidrel = BFN
Onto IVF! Started Lupron on 09/24. Added Gonal F and hcg injections 09/26...... Trigger 10/07. EggRetrieval 10/09. Starting PIO, Estrace, and Medrol 10/10/16. Transferred 2 "strong/beautiful" embryos 10/14/16. Beta 10/28/16 = 998 mIU/mL = BFP with one baby, but miscarried at 9w5d.
D&C on 12/06/17 and started taking BCPs 01/10/17 for the next IVF Cycle, which officially began stims on 02/18/17.
Fast Forward: we got 4 fertilized embryos from that cycle. Transferred one fresh, but it did not stick, so we have 3 frozen embryos currently. Went in to the fertility clinic in July to talk about a FET of one of those three frozen embryos, but a new fibroid was discovered, and I was not cleared to do the transfer until I had fibroid removal surgery.
08/11/17 had a mini-laparotomy / myomectomy to remove 6 fibroids, largest sized were the size of golf-balls! Once we were cleared to go about our normal lives (sex!) I got pregnant NATURALLY but it was a chemical pregnancy. The very next month we had another BFP and here we are now with a baby on the way! A TOTAL AND COMPLETE MIRACLE!
Watch our YouTube Channel Vlog Here!
Married March 2012
TTC #1 since 2012
May 7, 2016: IUI#1 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
June 6, 2016: IUI #2 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
IVF Consult 1 & 2: June 10, 2016 / July 15, 2016
Started Stims: July 15, 2016 (Lupron, Gonal-F, and Menopur)
Trigger ----> 08/03 ----> ER on 08/05 ----> Transfer ------> 08/10
BETA 1 (8/22) - 401 - BETA 2 (8/24) - 541 - BETA 3 (8/26) - 913
Baby Chadwell's First U/S: 09/06/2016 / EDD: 04/28/2017
Additionally - they had a lot of difficulty placing the catheter for the IUI both times... first time they had to use a tenaculum to hold my cervix in place (OUCH) and a metal sound (looks like a rod) to clear a path through my cervix, up to the top of my uterus (double OUCH) and needed ultrasound to assistance. Second time was better (no tenaculum or sound) but still needed ultrasound and was still what I would consider "VERY" painful. Lots of tears were shed during the procedure both times.
My IUI costs were about $400 for each attempt (for the oral medicine, semen prep, & insemination). My RE doesn't do any monitoring for oral meds, so that brings the cost down significantly. Based on the packet we got for IVF from our RE, the cost of 1 complete cycle was about $18k (including medicine, monitoring, egg retrieval, and fresh transfer). My RE doesn't even recommend people do IUIs with injectables because of the cost, he advises that, unless you're morally opposed to IVF for some reason, trying IUI with oral medications for up to 3 cyles, then moving straight to IVF, as being the more cost effective solution, than doing IUI with injectables.
If I were paying $2k per IUI and had insurance lifetime maximums to contend with, I think I would go to IVF as soon as possible.
Diagnosed with unexplained infertility
IUI #1- April '16 - BFN
IUI #2 - May '16 - BFN
IVF Fresh Xfer #1 (1 blastocyst) - Sept '16 - BFN
FET #2 - 11/8/16 (2 blastocysts) - Beta on 11/18
4 more blastocysts on ice
Married March 2012
TTC #1 since 2012
May 7, 2016: IUI#1 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
June 6, 2016: IUI #2 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
IVF Consult 1 & 2: June 10, 2016 / July 15, 2016
Started Stims: July 15, 2016 (Lupron, Gonal-F, and Menopur)
Trigger ----> 08/03 ----> ER on 08/05 ----> Transfer ------> 08/10
BETA 1 (8/22) - 401 - BETA 2 (8/24) - 541 - BETA 3 (8/26) - 913
Baby Chadwell's First U/S: 09/06/2016 / EDD: 04/28/2017
Married March 2012
TTC #1 since 2012
May 7, 2016: IUI#1 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
June 6, 2016: IUI #2 w/Clomid - BFN :'(
IVF Consult 1 & 2: June 10, 2016 / July 15, 2016
Started Stims: July 15, 2016 (Lupron, Gonal-F, and Menopur)
Trigger ----> 08/03 ----> ER on 08/05 ----> Transfer ------> 08/10
BETA 1 (8/22) - 401 - BETA 2 (8/24) - 541 - BETA 3 (8/26) - 913
Baby Chadwell's First U/S: 09/06/2016 / EDD: 04/28/2017
@ADRIANAC1982 Yes ICSI is where they inject the sperm into the egg directly, which increases the fertilization rate quite significantly. This is a standard practice for a lot of clinics, but not all. The research study I'm participating in requires it, as well as the biopsy for PGS testing.
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20