I'm freaking out right now

ElleMF728 · May 2016

So lately I haven't been feeling great, I've been exhausted and a bit sick. DH has been working 5-7 pm 7 days a week because it's a really busy, important time at work so I just attributed it to being a bit overworked and not eating the healthiest lately. Then a few days ago DH made a joke about the fact that I'm late, like 2 weeks late. I'm terrible at remembering these things. Unless we are actively trying to conceive I always forget when I last had a period or when I'm due to start. Also, I'm not super regular so it isn't unusual to be a little late although never that long.

I'm pregnant. I took a test and it was positive, no mistaking it. I'm freaking out and completely overwhelmed, we were not trying to have a baby right now. I have no idea what I'm going to do, I mean obviously I'm going to have a baby, God willing, but I have no idea how I'm going to handle this. I'm already exhausted, I will have 2U2 and a 3 year old. I know this is so superficial and selfish but DH and I JUST booked a trip to Aruba with some couple friends of ours for our anniversary in July. It was going to be my first vacation since our honeymoon that I would not have a brand new baby or be pregnant. I was really looking forward to sitting my drunk ass on the beach with a pina colada for the first time in years.

I know that I will fall completely in love with this baby and we have always wanted 3 children, it's just that right now I'm basically terrified. I don't think I'm going to even tell DH for 2 weeks since that is when his stressful time at work will be over. I think he suspects and I will continue to let him do that but I'm planning to tell him for sure when he is finished. Someone please talk me down from this ledge, I'm seriously shaking right now.

tlc11934 · May 2016

Deep breaths! I'm sure this is a huge shock to you and you're probably experiencing shock like symptoms. Have a cup of tea or a warm bath and take some deep breaths.

I know you're disappointed about your trip and I would be too. But, you should still go and have fun. Virgin pina coladas taste just as good and you deserve a few days on the beach!

As for the 3 under 3 - this will be the hardest part of your child rearing. Once your new LO is a toddler, you'll be relieved to be finished having babies. It might have been sooner than you wanted, but you'll get through it.

Deep breaths. Hugs!!!

LoveLee85 · May 2016

Omg! Well first, congratulations! Second, I would be freaking out also. It's natural! From your posts, you always have great advice and you are such a great mommy to your two babies you already have now. As for the vacation, not selfish at all!!! You deserve that, it will just have to wait until next summer for the drunk on your ass part. Think of the fun stuff! Baby names again?!?! Boy or girl?!?! Just think of how shocked and fun it will be to tell friends and family!! After the shock goes away, close siblings is going to rock! When are is your EDD?! Plus you already have all the baby stuff you could need I'm sure!

You have got this girl!!!!!!!!!!!!

Growingapepper · May 2016

I am sure you are absolutely terrified, I would be too! It's a completely normal reaction to such overwhelming news. It is going to be hard, no doubt about it. But the good news is that you can do it!!! You are the next super mom! In fact you already are.
I'm sorry about your trip to Aruba

hopefully you are still able to enjoy it while pregnant. It's a well deserved vacation. But still kind of a bummer that you don't get to fully enjoy it.
I think waiting to tell hubby is a good idea if you think it will negatively affect his work. You could plan a cute little "unveiling" of the news.
I believe in you, we're all here to offer our support

jwebbbber45678 · May 2016

It's going to be tough at first but just think about what a close bond your three children will have being so close in age. Some day you'll see them when they're older and playing with one another and this difficult year or two will just be a memory. Plus you don't have to go out and buy baby stuff, good luck mama!

dmbfan46835 · May 2016

Omg!!! How wonderful!!!! What a beautiful gift!! I'm sure it's going to be the hardest shit you have ever done but seriously, how cool too! Another beautiful babe to add to your brood!! Like the others said, you got this! Congratulations!!!!!!!

ElleMF728 · May 2016

Thanks everyone. Your kind words have already made me feel a little better. I really am thankful for this baby, just a bit shocked it's happening now rather than 6 months or a year from now! The one person I felt like I was able to tell was my mom who is amazing, she told me that I was a complete surprise as well and that turned out pretty great

. I'm going to wait to tell DH, but I'm going to call my OB today or tomorrow. I think I'm about 7 weeks but I'm not entirely sure so a dating scan would be helpful.

I guess our trip to Aruba will be an early sort of "babymoon" instead.

Thank you all so much. This is crazy times and the support is so wonderful. You're all fantastic Mamas!

chelseajeanene · May 2016

I'm a firm believer in "everything happens for a reason" so this is what is right for your family! Congratulations on your new little bundle of joy!! I know it's terrifying (I'm late too) but once he shock wears off I'm sure you're going to be so happy

ElleMF728 · May 2016

@chelseajeanene maybe you will join me again in this whole process. You are so right, everything does happen for a reason. It's so funny because DH just decided against a job opportunity that would have required us to move away from my family just days ago. It's like we were meant to be close to home

chelseajeanene · May 2016

@ElleMF728 yes! Exactly! It's so funny how things work out like that

kmcshane0211 · May 2016

Ok. I'm going to be 100% open and vulnerable here.

I didn't grow up with an attentive Mom. When my daughter arrived, I realized I had no map to follow on how to be a mother. I have to say that I have learned a TON about being a mom from your posts on here and am 100% certain you are a really really good mom! In a way, you've become a "mom model" for me and I believe---if anyone will take on this new baby and the challenges of three young ones close together---it's you!

You're kids are so lucky to have you. You will be okay!

And, I'm envious that you'll be through the sleepless nights, etc. when I'm still going through it for baby #2 down the road.

It'll be tough but you got this!

ElleMF728 · May 2016

@kmcshane0211 You're going to make me cry! Your posts always hit home for me because your LO sounds so much like DS1. The things that made me want to pull my hair out when he was a baby are the exact things that make him just the coolest toddler around and my BFF, so you are seriously lucky Mom!

And if you want to complain to me in a few years about sleepless nights, I'll be happy to listen to you vent. Although I'll keep my fingers crossed that you get one of those unicorn sleepers we all hear about but rarely see in the wild

kmcshane0211 · May 2016

@ElleMF728 Fingers crossed!

CraftyMommy14 · May 2016

Congrats!!!

lmbrandt · May 2016

@ElleMF728, I know it didn't go as planned, but congratulations, that is wonderful news!! It's true, you always have the best advice on here, you'll do just fine! You've got this mama! You've given me hope on many rough days that things will get better!

Hope you're feeling more like yourself soon!!

yellow1daisy · May 2016

That's amazing congrats! It'll work out. It will be SO hard but the tough early stages of parenting will be behind you and you'll have the rest of your life for vacations without pregnancy or a new baby

callistosmile · May 2016

Ahhhh! Congratulations! Tbh I'm a little jealous. I'd love another baby right away, but DS was a surprise and I doubt I could convince boyfriend we should just go for it lol. You are going to have so much fun! And Aruba is probably pretty freaking awesome even without the booze

rebekahrathe · May 2016

Congrats!! I'm happy to let you know that you aren't the only one! My daughter was born on September 17, 2015 and I'm due with my second on November 17, 2016!! EXACTLY 14 months! My hubby and I only want 2, weren't planning them this close together but this is our new reality, haha!! I was really, really freaking out at first...I had so many emotions. I've had some time to adjust to it and though I'm nervous because I know it's going to be hard I'm happy to be growing our family and giving our girl a sibling. I will tell you, some people did have some off the wall comments about how soon we are having another and that was hard to hear. I still breast feed in the morning but plan to stop by 9 months...I was only planning on going until then even before we found out. As far as your trip to Aruba, so fun and I COMPLETELY understand!! Last summer I turned 30 in August, super Prego! This year we were going to do something big to celebrate but it definitely changes being Prego. I have all these plans for next year now! Haha my hubby I'm sure thinks I'm silly but back to back pregnancies are hard as amazing as it is our bodies can even do this. I know I will look back and think wow!! So know you aren't alone! There is a Facebook group called "Irish twins" even though ours won't be considered because it's not 2 babies in 12 months....it's still fun to follow and read posts from people. Good luck and keep us posted!!!

ps, I recently read an article about a mom who has a 4 year old, 9 month old and just found out she is Prego with 2 sets of twins!! OMG!

aharders89 · May 2016

First of all, congratulations!!!! I can't imagine how stressful 3 kids that close in age will be, but this new addition will bring you and your family sooooo much joy! I've loved reading your advice on here for the past year and a half and I have faith that you can handle it!

jen83mn · May 2016

Congrats on your unexpected surprise! Totally understand it being a complete shock when you weren't planning for it, but you're just getting a jumpstart on making your family totally complete, maybe a little earlier than you had imagined, but everything will work itself out!

As for your trip, Aruba is my favorite place in the world! We went for our honeymoon, then got lucky enough to go back 10 months later because our resort comped us another 10 free nights. Aruba is AMAZING. If you love sunny, 85-degree weather every single day, you'll be in heaven! The no drinking part does suck, but load up on the virgin pina coladas that taste just as good

Where are you staying?

ElleMF728 · May 2016

@rebekahrathe Congrats to you too! It will be chaotic and crazy but wonderful I'm sure for both of us. It's great YH is so supportive, was he excited at first or really nervous? DH is great and I know he will come around but I'm pretty sure his initial reaction will be similar to mine even if he tries to hide it. I'm also a little apprehensive for some reactions from family and friends. They are good people but I'm sure we will get a few jokes or comments.
@jen83mn We are staying on the Palm Beach/Eagle Beach side. We went years ago for a destination wedding and stayed at the Radisson but I guess it was remodeled and is now a Hilton. I am really excited and am planning to catch up on some real rest after this last year. This will give me a chance to read a few books that I've had for years but haven't even opened yet and I'm definitely making an appointment to spend a day at the spa with the money I would have spent drinking

It will be different than I imagined but I'm sure it will be a lot of fun. That's amazing that your resort comped 10 nights! I can't believe that. Where did you stay? Any suggestions for things to do or dinners?

jen83mn · May 2016

We stayed at the RIU Palace on Palm Beach and loved it! It was an all-inclusive, so we did most our meals at the resort. But we did a few fun excursions: We went snorkeling/swimming at Baby Beach which was fun! The water is crystal clear and it's a great swimming area. We also took the shuttle into town and did some shopping at the outdoor market. We did a few other excursions that aren't really pregnancy-friendly (jeep tour of the island, parasailing, paddle boarding), but they have some fun boat tours too you could still take

If you're into golfing, my husband and his buddy went golfing on the north shore of the island near the lighthouse and loved it - spendy, but beautiful course

There's also a few bars/nightlife near Palm Beach down the block from where we were that we checked out one night. But mostly we laid on the beach or by the pool and soaked up the sun!

Bring those towel clips to clip your towel to the beach chair as there's always a breeze and sometimes it's pretty strong! We were there in January and the wind was pretty strong, but when we went in November it was a lot calmer, so not sure what it will be like for you! Enjoy yourself! We miss Aruba and it's on our list to go back once the kiddos are old enough to enjoy it

maddenmama15 · May 2016

Congratulations! I found out I was pregnant again when my daughter was only 6 months old...talk about a shock! But like somebody else already said, once the shock wears off you'll be so excited! Just like you were with your other babies

I'm 16 weeks now and starting to plan a gender reveal party for when we find out in a few weeks! It is scary still but just amazing to think about having another life growing within me again! Good luck to you!

imsoexcited915 · May 2016

Congrats!! I'm happy for you! I've enjoyed your posts and you've got his for sure!!

anamvicc · May 2016

First off congratulations!!!
Now let me say that you are an amazingly strong woman from the little I know of you and your motherhood journey through here! You have been such a great help to me any I know many others through this journey that I truly believe you will even more amazingly with three!
Sending you great vibes from here!

Kelliek327 · May 2016

Congrats! You always have great advice, you will do great! Hope you have a nice relaxing time in Aruba!

Bellarose212 · May 2016

That's so crazy and exciting! I know you'll be pumped once the shock wears off. My good friend has 3 under 3 and just found out she's pregnant with her 4th! She told me the good things about having them so close in age. 1. They all play together and are never bored. They all look out for each other- especially the youngest. 2. They have the same interests. They watch the same movies, read the same bedtime stories, and enjoy playing in the same area of the playground. 3. They will be so close as they get older. 4. She didn't have to worry about getting her body back! She plans to get back in shape after her last baby. It kinda sucks to get in shape and then get pregnant again a couple years later. This way you'll get it all out of the way and be done! Your boobs will be yours again! Like a pp said, it will be tough for a while - but you totally got this. Congratulations! Wishing you all the best!

mill1020 · May 2016

It's tough but you can do this.

Also wanted to echo things that PPs have mentioned about the perks of having them close in age. Our oldest three are very close friends and it's very cool to see.

Ask for as much help as possible from outside--friends, family members, and sitters. Most importantly, remember to be kind to yourself when you have tough days (every mom has them!).

All the best.

J1D · May 2016

I don't want to be "that guy" I swear I don't! Please don't hit me for being a Debbie Downer, I'm not trying to be, but I was literally just looking into travel and planning a vacation too and Aruba is a level 2 risk for Zika according to the CDC. Level one is just use normal precautions, level 2 is use a ton of precautions like cover up, use mosquito nets, stay inside where it's air conditioned, ect, and level 3 is don't go. When you see your doc maybe you could double check and see if it's all media hype or if it's something to actually consider?

Congratulations on your new baby! My sister was 3 months old when my mom got pregnant with me, I was totally a surprise

cmommy13 · May 2016

Congratulations

I have also read many of your posts and have been helped by your valuable mom advice! I also think that things happen for a reason. My DS was planned but I got pregnant right away which I was thankful for but wasn't expecting. When I went into labor and was terrified my nurse who was wonderful told me to say "I love this baby" through contractions. I know it's a super simple phrase, but it stuck with me. When he's teething and waking me up a lot or biting me or doesn't want to nap I just say in my head "I love this baby" and it reminds me how lucky I am to be his mom and how hard I worked to bring him into this world and how hard I still work to take care of him the best I can. Just remember this is your baby, the perfect baby for you, and you got this

Enjoy your vacation and maybe figure out a cute extra special way to tell DH to start the adventure off on a great note

Your kids are lucky to have you

jen83mn · May 2016

J1D said:

I don't want to be "that guy" I swear I don't! Please don't hit me for being a Debbie Downer, I'm not trying to be, but I was literally just looking into travel and planning a vacation too and Aruba is a level 2 risk for Zika according to the CDC. Level one is just use normal precautions, level 2 is use a ton of precautions like cover up, use mosquito nets, stay inside where it's air conditioned, ect, and level 3 is don't go. When you see your doc maybe you could double check and see if it's all media hype or if it's something to actually consider?

Congratulations on your new baby! My sister was 3 months old when my mom got pregnant with me, I was totally a surprise

I was just thinking about this too; I actually looked up Aruba a few weeks ago to see if they had it there because I love that place so much!

Definitely wise to check with your OB, since a bite on you (or your husband who could pass it to you through sex) could have scary consequences for the baby. Ugh, I hate that we all have to worry about this now

LoveLee85 · May 2016

J1D said:

I don't want to be "that guy" I swear I don't! Please don't hit me for being a Debbie Downer, I'm not trying to be, but I was literally just looking into travel and planning a vacation too and Aruba is a level 2 risk for Zika according to the CDC. Level one is just use normal precautions, level 2 is use a ton of precautions like cover up, use mosquito nets, stay inside where it's air conditioned, ect, and level 3 is don't go. When you see your doc maybe you could double check and see if it's all media hype or if it's something to actually consider?

Congratulations on your new baby! My sister was 3 months old when my mom got pregnant with me, I was totally a surprise

It's just being helpful, no Debbie downer here! I didn't know it was risk level 2, and OP might not either. I'm sure she will look into it and talk to her doctor about the risks as soon as she can.

ElleMF728 · May 2016

jen83mn said:

J1D said:

I don't want to be "that guy" I swear I don't! Please don't hit me for being a Debbie Downer, I'm not trying to be, but I was literally just looking into travel and planning a vacation too and Aruba is a level 2 risk for Zika according to the CDC. Level one is just use normal precautions, level 2 is use a ton of precautions like cover up, use mosquito nets, stay inside where it's air conditioned, ect, and level 3 is don't go. When you see your doc maybe you could double check and see if it's all media hype or if it's something to actually consider?

Congratulations on your new baby! My sister was 3 months old when my mom got pregnant with me, I was totally a surprise

I was just thinking about this too; I actually looked up Aruba a few weeks ago to see if they had it there because I love that place so much!

Definitely wise to check with your OB, since a bite on you (or your husband who could pass it to you through sex) could have scary consequences for the baby. Ugh, I hate that we all have to worry about this now

I saw this as well this weekend. I'm planning to discuss it with my OB as soon as possible and see if she thinks the precautions are enough or if I should just avoid. I have heard that most OBs will write a medical restriction letter which can help get our money back if we need to cancel. Either way, I'm determined to go away with my husband while Grammy and Papa get saddled with the kids for 3 or 4 days but it's possible that we may have to change the location

I ended up telling DH who was suspecting it anyway. His reaction was similar to mine but I can tell that he is coming around to idea. Today he sent a sweet message about looking at baby pictures and feeling nostalgic. Only 10 days left of this horrible work schedule and things will get back to normal around here.

chelseajeanene · May 2016

@ElleMF728 still no period over here...I think I am joining you. I'm too nervous to buy a test!

ElleMF728 · May 2016

chelseajeanene said:

@ElleMF728 still no period over here...I think I am joining you. I'm too nervous to buy a test!

Buy it! I'm dying to know lol. How are you feeling, have you been feeling gross at all?

chelseajeanene · May 2016

@ElleMF728 I have so many emotions about it lol I'm gonna go out tonight or tomorrow to buy one. My mothers birthday is Thursday, so if I am I want to make a shirt for the baby to wear to surprise her. I'm so tired, all day everyday. I've had spotting on 2 different occasions but only once during the day, which was weird. It was there when I went and not there the next time. I'm also feeling mildy crampy and s weird sensation around my left ovary. I don't know if you're a believer but I saw a medium before I got pregnant with my son, she told me I would be expecting soon and I conceived 5 days after I saw her. I saw her last month and she told me I would be expecting soon again...she even asked me if I was pregnant at the time

ElleMF728 · May 2016

@chelseajeanene That is so crazy! My first symptom was the insane exhaustion. Please update when you take your test. Is it bad that I'm hoping you are? I'd love to have a familiar face over in January.

jlemons-2 · May 2016

Congrats! Is it weird I am a little jealous? I love my little girl so much I would love to give her a sibling!

chelseajeanene · May 2016

@ElleMF728 I posted about it in the fb group but I took a test that was negative last night. I legit think I am though, I just had to run to the bathroom dry heaving...

yellowbean15 · May 2016

I just saw this! Congratulations! I'm glad you and your DH are both starting to feel better about it. I'm sure it will take some time to really sink in but you'll do great! You're house will be a whirlwind of fun and joy for years to come

ElleMF728 · May 2016

chelseajeanene said:

@ElleMF728 I posted about it in the fb group but I took a test that was negative last night. I legit think I am though, I just had to run to the bathroom dry heaving...

Maybe test again in a few days if your period still doesn't show up? Keep us updated!

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