How are yall with weight gain in the 2nd trimester so far?

22mango22 · May 2016

Just curious. Im a second time mom. With our first I was super under weight (about 5'2 and 83 lbs to start the pregnancy) and this time around I started at a healthy weight, all of that being said I was seeing a fertility specialist that didnt seem worried about my lack of weight gain and swelling (my legs were twice their normal size). But now that Im 17 wks Im still at my starting weight but already in maternity clothes. I havent mentioned it to my OB yet, they didnt seem to have all of my records from the specialist yet so they may not realize it.

k2k2tog · May 2016

I know it's hard, but I really wouldn't worry about your weight too much right now. Put your scale away. If there's a problem with how you're measuring, your OB will let you know. Just make sure your eating as healthy as you can, and relax. If your worried about the swelling, definitely mention it to them.

nlane0723 · May 2016

If your OB isn't worried, you shouldn't be either.

Also, weight posts don't go over well in general. Though natural, many women struggle with the though of gaining weight during pregnancy. Changing bodies and the like is difficult at times.

MRSCORKER · May 2016

nlane0723 said:

If your OB isn't worried, you shouldn't be either.

Also, weight posts don't go over well in general. Though natural, many women struggle with the though of gaining weight during pregnancy. Changing bodies and the like is difficult at times.

I have to agree with this. Comparing your weight gain or lack there of to another pregnant woman gets you absolutely no where. See what your doctor has to say, if he/she isn't concerned then you shouldn't be either. If your doctor is concerned, follow their guidelines. You will get absolutely no where comparing yourself to any one else. All of our pregnancies and bodies are unique

ignoscemihi · May 2016

Don't wait until your doctor gets your records. If you're concerned, tell your doctor exactly what your concern is. They may never mention your weight because if they think your weight gain is normal, they probably think you do too. My doctor has never mentioned weight to me except for the generally accepted "you'll want to gain between 25 and 35 pounds" guideline.

I may be reading too much into your post, but it sounds like there may be some underlying issues with food (perhaps disordered eating) that you may not have mentioned to your doctor. If that's the case, mention to your doctor now. Your doctor may be able to get you in touch with a specialist and maybe refer you to a nutritionist to help you gain a healthy amount of weight for your pregnancy. Maybe you did this with your first pregnancy, but since you're a "normal" weight now, you don't want to ask for the support. Tell your doctor what you need to make this a healthy pregnancy. You won't get it unless you ask.

thedouglas · May 2016

@22mango22 - I'm having the same concern. I'm 18 weeks and have only gained one pound (started at a normal weight). It's my first pregnancy, so I would like to hear other people's experiences with it - when did they start gaining weight, and how much? Is it too soon to be concerned at this point? They weren't concerned at my 16 week appt., but I also weighed less than normal at my very first appt., due to a stomach flu...so they probably think that I've gained more than I actually have. I'll obviously ask them about it at my 20 week, but it would be nice to hear others' experiences and try to get on track sooner than later, if it seems to be abnormal. I know everybody is different, but sometimes you can get a general idea from reading enough posts.

coffee89 · May 2016

In general this is something to discuss with your doctor and bring up any questions. I know people who gained nothing during their pregnancy and baby was growing fine so all was good, and I've known people who have gained 45 pounds with a happy healthy baby.

Comparing your body and baby to someone else's is not the healthiest thing to do.

knwils · May 2016

Guys, I don't think she was trying to compare. I'm having the same concerns and it's nice to get other moms' experiences to ease your mind.

It's kind of irritating how quick people are to shut down other mom's posts on here. Shouldn't we all be willing to lend advice and help each other. Not make each other feel stupid/bad/wrong/inconsiderate for asking a question. Seriously... if you're so concerned about sharing your weight information then don't post or follow the thread. It's literally that easy to not be offended! Lol...

I'm 15 weeks, 4 days today. I gained 5.5 lbs in the first tri (because literally all I could stomach was Taco Bell, gross, I know) Now I've maintained that weight but I also have had a really hard time eating. No appetite whatsoever. No sickness, just not hungry. I don't own a scale so I can't track my actual weight but I can tell by my body that, if anything, I've lost weight. It's concerning to me because I'm a ftm but I try not to dwell on it. Baby is healthy as far as we know and when I do eat, I eat healthy and I stay active and keep up with my prenatals.

Definitely discuss with your ob/midwife/whatever your concerns. That's part of their job, to listen, discuss and ease our worries (or verify them...). Just focus on taking care of yourself and eating well. Bodies are amazing in how they behave. This could just be your norm.

F47 · May 2016

I'm really curious to find out at my next appointment. I don't weight myself at home, but was sure I had gained a LOT at my last appointment. And, I'd only gained 1 lb. I couldn't believe that because my diet had been horrendous due to MS.

I've since gotten back to exercising and eating more healthily, but this week I've been soooo hungry. Like, it's out of control. So, we'll see.

I gained over the "recommended" amount with my first, but my doctor was never concerned. He said my body was simply gaining what it needed. I used to raise the concern at every appointment, too.

TurtleMomma · May 2016

Weight gain during pregnancy is always a touchy subject. Personally, I'm struggling because with DS I ended the first trimester 8lb under prePG weight and only gained 25lb total. This time, I ended first trimester 8lb up from prePG weight (though this time I started at a much healthier weight than last time). Every pregnancy is different. I keep waffling back and forth between wanting to get my shit in gear and put the brakes on my eating or whatever happens, happens. Regardless, I've had enough stress already with this pregnancy, I just want to enjoy it from here on out. I know I can lose the weight afterwards.

smmatt08 · May 2016

knwils said:

Guys, I don't think she was trying to compare. I'm having the same concerns and it's nice to get other moms' experiences to ease your mind.

It's kind of irritating how quick people are to shut down other mom's posts on here. Shouldn't we all be willing to lend advice and help each other. Not make each other feel stupid/bad/wrong/inconsiderate for asking a question. Seriously... if you're so concerned about sharing your weight information then don't post or follow the thread. It's literally that easy to not be offended! Lol...

I'm 15 weeks, 4 days today. I gained 5.5 lbs in the first tri (because literally all I could stomach was Taco Bell, gross, I know) Now I've maintained that weight but I also have had a really hard time eating. No appetite whatsoever. No sickness, just not hungry. I don't own a scale so I can't track my actual weight but I can tell by my body that, if anything, I've lost weight. It's concerning to me because I'm a ftm but I try not to dwell on it. Baby is healthy as far as we know and when I do eat, I eat healthy and I stay active and keep up with my prenatals.

Definitely discuss with your ob/midwife/whatever your concerns. That's part of their job, to listen, discuss and ease our worries (or verify them...). Just focus on taking care of yourself and eating well. Bodies are amazing in how they behave. This could just be your norm.

The title of the thread is literally "How are yall with weight gain..." and she went on to talk about HER body. If she wasn't looking to gauge a comparison, why would the post be titled as it was? People offered support to the OP that was way more helpful than "I'm 5'5" and weigh blah blah blah," because THAT is a comparison. Seriously, the only people who should care about your weight gain are you and your doctor.

MKJeffrey2002 · May 2016

knwils said:

Guys, I don't think she was trying to compare. I'm having the same concerns and it's nice to get other moms' experiences to ease your mind.

It's kind of irritating how quick people are to shut down other mom's posts on here. Shouldn't we all be willing to lend advice and help each other. Not make each other feel stupid/bad/wrong/inconsiderate for asking a question. Seriously... if you're so concerned about sharing your weight information then don't post or follow the thread. It's literally that easy to not be offended! Lol...

I'm 15 weeks, 4 days today. I gained 5.5 lbs in the first tri (because literally all I could stomach was Taco Bell, gross, I know) Now I've maintained that weight but I also have had a really hard time eating. No appetite whatsoever. No sickness, just not hungry. I don't own a scale so I can't track my actual weight but I can tell by my body that, if anything, I've lost weight. It's concerning to me because I'm a ftm but I try not to dwell on it. Baby is healthy as far as we know and when I do eat, I eat healthy and I stay active and keep up with my prenatals.

Definitely discuss with your ob/midwife/whatever your concerns. That's part of their job, to listen, discuss and ease our worries (or verify them...). Just focus on taking care of yourself and eating well. Bodies are amazing in how they behave. This could just be your norm.

I agree. I think that even though everyone gains differently it's reassuring to hear other people are early gainers, late gainers, zero gainers, etc. I gained a lot in first tri which all the websites say is abnormal but I have energy to walk daily on lunch and exercise now and haven't gained anything in 2nd tri yet. With my first pregnancy, I gained a lot early on and then lost in 3rd tri. I weigh daily out of habit and see a lot of water fluctuations. I think cutting sodium and increasing my water intake have helped stop the crazy gains I had in 1st tri in 2nd tri.

kathleenkat · May 2016

I gained all of my weight in the first trimester. I put on about 20 pounds due to being hungry and sleep all the time. I had no energy, I just ate and slept. No morning sickness either, which I have heard helps keep the weight down. Now in the second trimester, I've gained only 3 pounds. I think every body is different.

MRSCORKER · May 2016

smmatt08 said:

knwils said:

Guys, I don't think she was trying to compare. I'm having the same concerns and it's nice to get other moms' experiences to ease your mind.

It's kind of irritating how quick people are to shut down other mom's posts on here. Shouldn't we all be willing to lend advice and help each other. Not make each other feel stupid/bad/wrong/inconsiderate for asking a question. Seriously... if you're so concerned about sharing your weight information then don't post or follow the thread. It's literally that easy to not be offended! Lol...

The title of the thread is literally "How are yall with weight gain..." and she went on to talk about HER body. If she wasn't looking to gauge a comparison, why would the post be titled as it was? People offered support to the OP that was way more helpful than "I'm 5'5" and weigh blah blah blah," because THAT is a comparison. Seriously, the only people who should care about your weight gain are you and your doctor.

I have to agree with @smmatt08 on this one. It might be reassuring to see that other pregnant women have a similar experience as you but for however many people have your same experience, there are the same amount of people who will tell you they had the opposite experience and make you feel like something is wrong with you. Weight is always a touchy subject and you can't dictate how people respond on a public forum. Some of us might respond and list our heights and weights and how much we've gained and offer that as support and some of us, myself included, offer support by way of suggesting you consult your doctor and stay away from comparing yourself to others because that is what has worked for us.

Disagreeing with someone and offering another perspective does not mean we're "shutting down other mom's".

knwils · May 2016

Ugh. Super sensitive people seriously eat at me. I cannot hack it.

Who the hell cares if she was trying to compare. That's her business. All of the advice was to talk to her doctor, and then to not ask questions about weight because it hurts people's feelings and to talk to her doctor about eating disorders because she probably has one (because we're all qualified to diagnose that, I guess, but not offer our experience of weight gain/loss during pregnancy)

Here's the deal: don't want to talk about it, then don't. Don't think someone should have posted it, too bad, they did, now, move along. Feeling uncertain about someone's intentions? ASK! Omgosh, ASKING! Who'd have thought that was a possibility? "Hey, are you looking to get comparisons to what you're dealing with or do you just want to share experiences?" "Are you concerned that you may have an eating disorder?" "Have you experienced unhealthy relationships with weight in the past?" "Have you talked to your doctor about your concerns?" "I'm not comfortable sharing my weight story but I am wondering exactly what support your looking for...?"
Holy. Crap. I mean, we are in fact all pregnant here, so I assume we are all mature adults, but hell, who knows, right?

/rant

ibabyloveb87 · May 2016

I'm just over here like....

kmalls · May 2016

knwils said:

Ugh. Super sensitive people seriously eat at me. I cannot hack it.

Who the hell cares if she was trying to compare. That's her business. All of the advice was to talk to her doctor, and then to not ask questions about weight because it hurts people's feelings and to talk to her doctor about eating disorders because she probably has one (because we're all qualified to diagnose that, I guess, but not offer our experience of weight gain/loss during pregnancy)

Here's the deal: don't want to talk about it, then don't. Don't think someone should have posted it, too bad, they did, now, move along. Feeling uncertain about someone's intentions? ASK! Omgosh, ASKING! Who'd have thought that was a possibility? "Hey, are you looking to get comparisons to what you're dealing with or do you just want to share experiences?" "Are you concerned that you may have an eating disorder?" "Have you experienced unhealthy relationships with weight in the past?" "Have you talked to your doctor about your concerns?" "I'm not comfortable sharing my weight story but I am wondering exactly what support your looking for...?"
Holy. Crap. I mean, we are in fact all pregnant here, so I assume we are all mature adults, but hell, who knows, right?

/rant

Wow. Weight is ALWAYS a super sensitive topic for lots of people. Just because it happens to be a safe topic for you doesn't mean it's a safe topic for everyone. If you lurked here at all you'd see these posts don't go over well. It shouldn't be surprising in the least. If you want to respond to the OP go right ahead, just don't take offense when people don't agree with you. That's how a community works.

smmatt08 · May 2016

@knwils I honestly wasn't interested in this thread, it seemed very mellow, until you came in and started something out of nothing with this: knwils said:

It's kind of irritating how quick people are to shut down other mom's posts on here. Shouldn't we all be willing to lend advice and help each other. Not make each other feel stupid/bad/wrong/inconsiderate for asking a question. Seriously... if you're so concerned about sharing your weight information then don't post or follow the thread. It's literally that easy to not be offended! Lol...

Some of us are almost halfway through our pregnancies and have been spending weeks offering advice and support on the daily and weekly threads. A special post to discuss weight gain (or lack there-of in the case of the OP?) is a little old at this point.

And in regards to this: knwils said:

Holy. Crap. I mean, we are in fact all pregnant here, so I assume we are all mature adults, but hell, who knows, right?

I think the mature adults in this group realize that this is a discussion to have with your doctor, and not on this board, hence all the posters responding that way. Or maybe I am just immature and "super sensitive" for suggesting that.

Piperella · May 2016

knwils said:

Ugh. Super sensitive people seriously eat at me. I cannot hack it.

This suddenly became a FFFC.

mothernorth · May 2016

strickland8052 · May 2016

I maintained in the first tri, then gained four lbs during the first four weeks of the second tri. The doctor said it was right on track for the 20-30 lbs that I should gain over the course of this pregnancy. However, I'm just curious.... Do people tend to have growth spurts with weeks of more weight gain and other weeks with none? OR do people tend to steadily gain a certain amount each week? Or is it different for everyone? I'm hoping I'm not on a lb a week track like I have been this past month, but at the end of the day... It's not the end of the world if I am. I would love to hear others experiences, but I guess this thread isn't going that way....

*** As far as the drama, I don't get it... Sex, vag odors, bleeding, etc are all uncomfortable topics for some and all topics that would probably best be discussed with your OB. Bump pictures could make some compare themselves to others and feel like they are too big/too small. We still share our general feelings, questions, concerns about those things. Why not talk about our general experience with this inevitable aspect of pregnancy? It would probably just validate the point that Everyone is different, but we also may learn some things along the way....

**Disclaimer: I've read the general standard is 20-30 pounds. If you are overweight or underweight, this could be different for you. Please talk to your doctor about specific questions, but hey, can't we share general thoughts and experiences?

MRSCORKER · May 2016

strickland8052 said:

I maintained in the first tri, then gained four lbs during the first four weeks of the second tri. The doctor said it was right on track for the 20-30 lbs that I should gain over the course of this pregnancy. However, I'm just curious.... Do people tend to have growth spurts with weeks of more weight gain and other weeks with none? OR do people tend to steadily gain a certain amount each week? Or is it different for everyone? I'm hoping I'm not on a lb a week track like I have been this past month, but at the end of the day... It's not the end of the world if I am. I would love to hear others experiences, but I guess this thread isn't going that way....

*** As far as the drama, I don't get it... Sex, vag odors, bleeding, etc are all uncomfortable topics for some and all topics that would probably best be discussed with your OB. Bump pictures could make some compare themselves to others and feel like they are too big/too small. We still share our general feelings, questions, concerns about those things. Why not talk about our general experience with this inevitable aspect of pregnancy? It would probably just validate the point that Everyone is different, but we also may learn some things along the way....

**Disclaimer: I've read the general standard is 20-30 pounds. If you are overweight or underweight, this could be different for you. Please talk to your doctor about specific questions, but hey, can't we share general thoughts and experiences?

I get what you're saying, and I do think it's good to hear other people's experiences. When I think about it in comparison to the HDBD thread and symptoms thread, I see where you're coming from. I guess for me, weight is such a touchy subject, that I try not to let anyone else's experiences or opinions be a factor. That goes for pre-pregnancy as well as now. I guess that was why my advice to the OP was to check with her OB because that's what I would do in that situation. Things like nausea during first tri or headaches during second tri, those things are universally known to be normal. Weight gain during pregnancy has such a wide range of normal and it's so individual that for me, the comparison game is a dangerous path to go down.
I'll admit to being extra senstive in this department. Weight is a trigger for me so if I came across as snarky, I apologize. My intention was only to offer my perspective.

nlane0723 · May 2016

Image: https://i.giphy.com/ixLYNqV0oMPwQ.gif

ignoscemihi · May 2016

I was not trying to be judgmental nor was I dismissing the OP. Her words just struck a chord with me and I offered the best advice I could give. I don't know what her story is. She didn't get into details except to say she was pretty underweight with her first pregnancy (BMI of 15.2 - which isn't necessarily a sign of an eating disorder, but it certainly can be) and that she hasn't told her doctor she hasn't gained weight even though she's obviously concerned about it. It sounded to me like she wanted reassurance, and it didn't seem helpful to say "I'm a second-time-mom and I've gained ___ pounds so far." That felt like I was telling her that her experience wasn't normal. I don't have any problem with others who have a similar experience to @22mango22 sharing to commiserate. In the end, though, if it's something she's concerned with, she should tell her doctor so it doesn't cause her unnecessary stress.

And @22mango22, I hope you weren't offended by my post. I am not trying to imply you have an eating disorder or did in the past. I just thought it might be in the realm of possibilities and thought that if it was something you struggled with, even in the past, it's an important thing to tell your doctor. If not, then there are many reasons you may not have gained weight at 17 weeks. Some people don't gain weight until later in the pregnancy. Some barely gain any weight the entire pregnancy. The only way to know if it's normal for you is to talk to your doctor about it.

Schell2013 · May 2016

MRSCORKER said:

nlane0723 said:

If your OB isn't worried, you shouldn't be either.

Also, weight posts don't go over well in general. Though natural, many women struggle with the though of gaining weight during pregnancy. Changing bodies and the like is difficult at times.

I have to agree with this. Comparing your weight gain or lack there of to another pregnant woman gets you absolutely no where. See what your doctor has to say, if he/she isn't concerned then you shouldn't be either. If your doctor is concerned, follow their guidelines. You will get absolutely no where comparing yourself to any one else. All of our pregnancies and bodies are unique

Yes don't compare yourself to others! Evergone is super different when it comes to weight gain. Just eat properly, moderate exercise (Doctor approved) and take care of yourself!

jbal918 · May 2016

I definitely would talk to your doctor. Let them know what you think/feel and see if they have any concerns. If not, don't worry. Easier said than done, I know!

*edited to fix wording

rhenson1 · May 2016

I'm almost 17 weeks and still weigh the exact same as when I found out. (I'm about 5'4 and 130lbs). This is my 4th pregnancy and every one has been different. The first pregnancy I lost weight in the beginning and the second and third pregnancy I gained quite a bit. My doctor doesn't seem concerned at all. She said that anything I eat goes to baby first.

Mintz1982 · May 2016

I gained 5 lbs in first trimester I was put on a diet because of previous pregnancies cut out all white, white bread, potatoes, flour etc and was told to walk an extra 30 minutes a day I only gained 2 so far in 2nd trimester. If you are having a boy it could be the reason your not gaining as much I lost 30lbs in first trimester wih my son because he was taking everything I could keep down then I put on 24 of it again. If your doctor says you and baby are healthy don't worry about the scale. I'm a Chubby Mommy to begin with so I'm more freaking out about the losing after this baby.

klv · May 2016

I've gained 2 lbs so far. But when I found out I was pregnant, I stopped drinking beer and cut way back on soda. So I am sure the lifestyle change has counteracted some of the baby weight gain.

Same thing happened with my last pregnancy. No beer, less soda. Gained 18 lbs total. But everyone is different.

Sally1990 · May 2016

I have lost 12 lbs so far, but I never fully lost it all from my 2nd 2 years ago. I always lose weight in the beginning and then gain it and then some by the end. But so far I have not gained and but lost quite a bit.

nsquaredlife13 · May 2016

At this point in my last pregnancy, I was about 8lbs in. At my 16w checkup this week, I was 12 ounces. No idea why, I'm growing for sure, but my midwife wasn't the slightest bit concerned.

Honestly, as long as your doctor isn't worried you shouldn't be. And if it's been a while since you saw your doctor and you're worried, give them a call or message them. The most important thing for you is to not stress out. Relax, have some ice cream, and enjoy daydreaming about your little love.

SuperNerd42 · May 2016

We have compared all kinds of experiences with each other- some very common and some quite sensitive (bleeding, loss, fears, etc). I can see how weight is a sensitive topic for people, but that doesn't make it any less relevant to what we're all going through. I don't understand why this topic is taboo but swamp crotch, sex positions, and others are up for grabs.

OP- with my first I lost weight through my first trimester, and that was starting at a doctor's measured baseline that was ten under my prepregnancy weight. I was concerned and mentioned it to her, and we had a really good talk about it. This round I have been able to gain (10 lbs in 15 weeks, for those playing along at home). She hasn't even mentioned it. There is a huge range of normal, but what is healthy for you is something your doctor can help you determine.

ladyshark311 · May 2016

I see zero difference between this post and another from a few days ago asking who was "showing" or not and that person wasn't flamed in any way. I don't believe the OP was trying to compare herself to anyone and I'm sure she knows her OB would be the "expert" on that. This post along with many others is just a way of comparing experiences, thoughts etc. Everyone is always talking about weight on this board and nobody says a word.

To OP, I haven't actually gained a single pound yet and I was worrying about it until I had an US at the ER and saw my baby girl and she was right on track. That made me feel a lot better and as long as you are eating right and drinking plenty of fluids I wouldn't worry yourself over it.

freckledlemonade · May 2016

I think the problem with these threads is you usually don't get a great representation of what different people are gaining. Usually it's people who have not gained at all or who haven't gained much that contribute. This was true on my last BMB too. Then it makes the people who are gaining more quickly (or at least gaining more in the beginning) feel bad.

So I'll take one for the team. At almost 18 weeks I've gained 14 lbs. It is what it is. I'm doing spin class and eating when I'm hungry, and now that I'm feeling better I'm eating healthier foods. 1st tri is always hard for me with m/s, and I eat to calm my stomach..and usually all I can stomach is carbs.

Hoping the weight gain slows in 2nd tri because I'm sure it'll pick up in 3rd tri. With dd I gained 50 lbs, and had lost over 30 of it 2 weeks postpartum. She was a big baby (9lb 7oz), and I had a lot of retained fluids. Some of the weight gain you just can't control.

So any fast gaining mamas out there, don't feel bad. I'm right there with ya! Grow babies grow.

MKJeffrey2002 · May 2016

sidecarsareforbishes said:

I think the problem with these threads is you usually don't get a great representation of what different people are gaining. Usually it's people who have not gained at all or who haven't gained much that contribute. This was true on my last BMB too. Then it makes the people who are gaining more quickly (or at least gaining more in the beginning) feel bad.

So I'll take one for the team. At almost 18 weeks I've gained 14 lbs. It is what it is. I'm doing spin class and eating when I'm hungry, and now that I'm feeling better I'm eating healthier foods. 1st tri is always hard for me with m/s, and I eat to calm my stomach..and usually all I can stomach is carbs.

Hoping the weight gain slows in 2nd tri because I'm sure it'll pick up in 3rd tri. With dd I gained 50 lbs, and had lost over 30 of it 2 weeks postpartum. She was a big baby (9lb 7oz), and I had a lot of retained fluids. Some of the weight gain you just can't control.

So any fast gaining mamas out there, don't feel bad. I'm right there with ya! Grow babies grow.

Right there with you. I went up over 15 in first tri. I actually hit a low weight (since I started my weight loss plan) in first month before bfp so I'm not sure whether to count that as my starting weight or use my 1/1 weight but either way we are looking at 15+ pounds. I'm an early gainer. I gained 37 with my son in 2006 (pretty much all in 1st and 2nd tri) and lost 30 at six week checkup doing very little other than bf. I think it depends on whether or not you have ms and how your body holds on to water. So far I've leveled off in 2nd tri and will pprobably be +1 pound at my 20 week checkup so if I can keep it at a couple pounds a month going forward I'll still be at a reasonable gain.

Blonde1817 · May 2016

@sidecarsareforbishes Thanks for sharing, that's so good to know! Last I checked, I was up about 8lbs (probably up more by now). Only 3 or so in the 1st Tri, but since the 2nd Tri it's been coming on quickly! Part of it is that I was lucky enough to not have much nausea in the beginning. I was worried about the pace of weight gain so I came right out and asked my doctor. I have a feeling she would only mention it if my weight gain or lack thereof was really dire, so I just asked. She said all was normal. I've been exercising regularly and I eat well rounded meals when I'm hungry, this is just what my body needs to do.

I don't mind these threads because I feel like the variety of experiences can be normalizing. But if it is triggering for you, definitely stay away! If you suspect your weight gain or lack thereof could be related to disordered eating, please be open to treatment. But also don't hold your breath for your doctor to recognize it for you, general medical professionals don't generally know much about eating disorders.

Here's a link to a quick, anonymous, free screening tool.... https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/online-eating-disorder-screening

JamieK1882 · May 2016

@sidecarsareforbishes preach! THANK YOU for posting this!

kmalls · May 2016

So here's a post that was pinned for a while in my last BMB. I think it expresses pretty well my feelings on this, and seems to be relevant to our stage of pregnancy. I bolded what (to me) resonates particularly well:

"Good morning lovelies!

I want to address this now and get some feedback because many of us are showing and beginning to put on weight. I just want to remind everyone that how much weight we gain or lose in the coming months is going to vary drastically. Some may gain 20 lbs, some 70, while another may lose weight during the course of their pregnancy. As long as you are being monitored by your doctor or midwife and you and the baby are healthy you should not worry. If you are concerned about weight gain please address it with your doctor. Gaining weight or not gaining weight does not dictate who you are or who you will be as a mother. EVERY body is different, every pregnancy is different. Remember to love yourselves and cut yourself some slack.

Also, as we progress through the 2nd trimester and into the 3rd it's common to see "How much weight have you gained?!" threads. These never end well and usually involve a lot of women feeling judged. It can be particularly hurtful to those with ED's. Let's try to avoid those.

In summation: Love yourself and your body, it's doing some pretty amazing things!"

Ultimately I don't believe the OP in this case set out to judge or make anyone else FEEL judged, but in many cases that's exactly what happens. I think it's one thing to say "hey, I'm a little worried about my weight gain/loss and haven't had a chance to talk to my OB yet" versus "how much weight have you gained." The first is a legitimate concern, the second invites unnecessary comparisons.

Anyway, hopefully this post gets people to think about why, for some, weight posts are rough. Participate if you want (obviously) but also be
conscious of how difficult this subject can be.

LGW2015 · May 2016

I also don't see a problem with the post. I don't see it as any different than what we've all been doing on the board this whole time, comparing symptoms and experiences. And for those people who might feel sensitive about the issue of weight and not want to participate in the discussion, that's valid too. Obviously I don't want anyone to feel bad about themselves, especially due to other people's comments on a thread, but I don't think that's an inherent problem with this thread. We can discuss weight without it having anything to do with judgment, just as we discuss other symptoms in the hopes of relating to others, sharing experiences and reassuring ourselves that our symptoms aren't worrisome. Simply stating that I've gained 20 lbs or lost 20 lbs so far isn't a judgment. And I can definitely see myself being concerned about the health of the baby if I wasn't gaining weight and look for reassurance that it can be normal and others have had the same experience, as I've done on this board with other symptoms. That's the way I read the original post.

ETA: the reasoning not to have a thread like this applies to all of the symptoms threads (it's something you should talk to your OB about, everyone is different, etc.).

PrimRoseMama · May 2016

8 lbs in first trimester this time.

cassieleeanne · May 2016

1 pound in the first trimester, but already another three the first week of the second trimester. Starting to actually like food again, probably why I have gained. I love the carbs and can't help but eat them some days, but keeping up with fruits and veggies too.