FFFC | 4.22

ShallowSeas · April 2016

Not guaranteed to be flame free...

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/ub/4br8nf7h62uw.gif

Flame on.

AlexLindzz · April 2016

I've spent most of this morning at work looking for a meme that accurately represents how I feel about it being Friday to send to my co-workers.

KilgraveMadeMeDoIt · April 2016

I am loathe to start a flame war, but I've got to get it out somewhere. I've been through this debate a million times and I know the same damn nonsense bullshit is going to get trotted out again and again but dammit, I have to get this out because it's bothering me.

Im huge on 'you do you' when it comes to pregnancy, birth and parenting. Huge. I don't care how someone chooses to birth or parent so long as they are keeping safety in mind and not making really dumb, dangerous choices (like feeding their infant nothing but almond milk.) There's a huge range of 'whatever works for your family' choices that we're all going to make. Breastmilk or formula or both, sleep training, baby led weaning, whether to buy or make baby food, disciplinary structures, type of schooling.

But vaccines are not one of them. They are not a 'parenting choice.' No, you do not know better than every bloody researcher and major medical organization in the world. No, there is no freaking conspiracy to poison and sicken millions of children. No, doctors don't want to profit off of making your kid ill. I'm a future doctor, I have not a single industry affiliation whatsoever and never will allow that (I won't even accept a drug-company-labeled free pen!) and my kids are fully and completely vaccinated and this next one will be too because vaccines are safe - safer than eating, safer than driving, safer than Tylenol, safer than the diseases they protect against by orders of magnitude - and they are effective. If your kid has an actual medical contraindication, I have absolutely no beef with that, but for frig's sake, vaccines are as essential to the maintenance of public health as clean drinking water, food safety standards, and flush toilets.

MissAmeliaPond · April 2016

@KilgraveMadeMeDoIt

Image: https://fusiondotnet.files.wordpress.com/2015/05/preach-it.gif?w=500&h=282

KilgraveMadeMeDoIt · April 2016

Also, I'm really opinionated and prone to soapboxing. (Other confession, hah)

acastl24 · April 2016

KilgraveMadeMeDoIt said:

I am loathe to start a flame war, but I've got to get it out somewhere. I've been through this debate a million times and I know the same damn nonsense bullshit is going to get trotted out again and again but dammit, I have to get this out because it's bothering me.

Im huge on 'you do you' when it comes to pregnancy, birth and parenting. Huge. I don't care how someone chooses to birth or parent so long as they are keeping safety in mind and not making really dumb, dangerous choices (like feeding their infant nothing but almond milk.) There's a huge range of 'whatever works for your family' choices that we're all going to make. Breastmilk or formula or both, sleep training, baby led weaning, whether to buy or make baby food, disciplinary structures, type of schooling.

But vaccines are not one of them. They are not a 'parenting choice.' No, you do not know better than every bloody researcher and major medical organization in the world. No, there is no freaking conspiracy to poison and sicken millions of children. No, doctors don't want to profit off of making your kid ill. I'm a future doctor, I have not a single industry affiliation whatsoever and never will allow that (I won't even accept a drug-company-labeled free pen!) and my kids are fully and completely vaccinated and this next one will be too because vaccines are safe - safer than eating, safer than driving, safer than Tylenol, safer than the diseases they protect against by orders of magnitude - and they are effective. If your kid has an actual medical contraindication, I have absolutely no beef with that, but for frig's sake, vaccines are as essential to the maintenance of public health as clean drinking water, food safety standards, and flush toilets.

How mad do you think these parents would be if they found out the medical staff treating their newborns were not vaccinated and passed on whooping cough or the flu or worse?

hFab14 · April 2016

Hate to interrupt a good pro-vax war (team vax, for the record). Literally just drove past vaccine protesters - maybe they read @KilgraveMadeMeDoIt post

confession: I love looking at people's dirty houses when they post selfies on social media.

muybueno · April 2016

hFab14 said:

Hate to interrupt a good pro-vax war (team vax, for the record). Literally just drove past vaccine protesters - maybe they read @KilgraveMadeMeDoIt post

confession: I love looking at people's dirty houses when they post selfies on social media.

What are vaccine protestors? I mean, I can guess what they WANT, but where are they protesting? What are their demands? What do they look like?

pinnerk · April 2016

@KilgraveMadeMeDoIt YOU GO GIRL!! lol.
-I have a fruitarian Facebook friend. She went through her entire pregnancy only eating raw fruit. She still to this day doesn't even drink water.
She had major complications during her pregnancy and blamed it on air...
She was planning a home water birth but she got so sick she had to be admitted and refused IV.
Can you believe that she doesn't believe in vaccines ? Ugh. Whenever I hear of someone that unintelligent it makes me think they've got a brain tumor that is prohibiting rational thinking.

My confession is I work in an hour and a half and haven't left my bed.
I have such a busy weekend that this is the only time I'll have to relax.
I'm also debating not telling my family that I am pregnant. I just have no interest.
I'm also going to have McDonalds for my breakfast too.

EmmieAnn22 · April 2016

@hFab14People protest vaccines? Where? That's so bizarre.

Last pregnancy we took a birth class and a pediatrician came to speak to us. There was a couple who were very pro delayed schedule vaccination. The pediatrician said that was a very common request these days and she simply tells parents, "Your child's healthcare is your decision. If you want a delayed schedule you are going against my recommendations but I'll respect your choice. You have to tell me what you want the schedule of vaccines to be though. You tell me what diseases you want your child protected against and which you are willing to take a chance of your child getting because I will not have that on my conscious." My husband leaned over and said he loved her and wanted her to be our pediatrician.

My confession.... When I spend time with either of my best friends I always leave with a very clear idea of how I will not parent my children.

hFab14 · April 2016

They look like a bunch of people who don't have anything better to do at noon on a weekday. They are holding signs about the CDC doing a cover up and they have a child with them holding a child sized protest sign (which is super sad - I'm guessing he doesn't go to school?).

They want to be HEARD, @muybueno and they are protesting outside of a Starbucks near the mall.

My office is super close to the prime protest spot so we get lots of good things. Last week was anti-circumcision. They all wore white with red "blood" and held up signs about amputation.

aquasocks · April 2016

My Fffc is that I've been off the bump this week because norovirus hit my house like a fucking vomit cyclone, and I'm not even bothering to see what I missed because I'm afraid I'll see a food post and start puking again. So did I miss anything good?

PS- "off the bump" sounds like I've finally quit doing the drugs or something.

hFab14 · April 2016

@aquasocks definitely skip yesterday's UO thread. It should more accurately be called "Sandwhich Type Debate."

shevaCC · April 2016

My prenatal vitamin was making me extra nauseous so I switched to taking it at night after some suggestions here. Now I only remember to take it every other night.

muybueno · April 2016

@aquasocks
Oh no, so sorry to hear that!

Read the Beer thread. That's about as close as we got to drama. Skip Pregnancy Expectations v Reality because it's depressing and has a lot of mentions of nausea and vomiting. Team Green Anyone? is amusing.

shamrocandroll · April 2016

hFab14 said:

(snip)

My office is super close to the prime protest spot so we get lots of good things. Last week was anti-circumcision. They all wore white with red "blood" and held up signs about amputation.

My FFFC: I'm leaving the circumcision decision completely to my husband because I have no basis for forming a strong opinion one way or the other.

PurpleBrunette · April 2016

I've seen both anti-vaxxers and anti-circumcision protesters. I live in the neighborhood surrounding the state capital and people LOVE protesting there. Plus my office is in a high-traffic area that sees a lot of protesters.

(If anyone is curious, my husband took some pictures of the anti-circumcision protesters. He couldn't believe the outfits.)

banfrog · April 2016

My mom called me to tell me that my brother and his wife are expecting their 2nd child (due in Dec). I told her that I'm super excited for them. (I totally am. I'm dying to start some knitting projects for their baby and something for their daughter as a big sister present.) My mom then made a point of saying "you'll have to share this year being pregnant." I replied "I know! That is so awesome! I'm so freaking excited for them." She then says "oh. Don't say anything to them. I don't think they wanted me to tell anyone yet."
Yah. So she's trying stir up crap. I'm so not impressed.
I texted my brother and SIL and congratulated them. I thought about not saying anything but 1) I'm so excited for them and 2) it's not fair that my mom robbed them from the sharing the news themselves and from the initial excited and happy reactions and 3) because if I found out everyone already knew but didn't say anything I would be pissed.
I'm so happy for them. My fffc in this is I also kind of hope my brother gives my mom an earful for blabbing.

honeybeewebb2424 · April 2016

@pinnerk totally feeling the same way about telling everyone thats left. Mainly being my MIL and my grandmother. I just have no interest in dealing with them and have honestly contemplated hiding from my husbands family for the next 6 months and just popping in at Thanksgiving like surprise! Look what I baked!

Confession: I ate way too many fruit roll ups than I'll ever admit to between yesterday and today. Havent had them in years but NEEDED them yesterday!

remaroni · April 2016

FFFC: I can't read the team green thread. I have a bias from my last BMB. There was one chick on there who was so obnoxious and would constantly remind everyone about being team green, and mention it in every conversation. She was always bragging about it and letting everyone know it was because she was sooooo "laid back and go with the flow". I hated the argument that if you want to find out you are some like uptight control freak or something. I simply just want to find out cause I want to know...that's it really. I think it is one of those most exciting moments during pregnancy. Want to find out? Cool. Don't want to find out? Cool. You aren't going to birth out a gold medal for waiting until the end to find out.

MissAmeliaPond · April 2016

My confession: literally every day I say to myself, "I need to take a break from TB". And yet here I am. Every day. I have no will power.

shevaCC · April 2016

@MissAmeliaPond -- don't quit us!

g8rmama_16 · April 2016

I don't understand why you need to protest circumcision. No one is making anyone do it. Are they protesting to all parents for doing it without the babies consent? I am so confused.
And I am with you @shamrocandroll it will be up to my husband if we do it or not.

grannysmith912 · April 2016

H and I have very different "home maintenance" styles: I like to keep things tidy on the spot (wash dishes right after eating, put things back in their places after using, etc.), and he likes to let things pile up until he has no other option but to clean (or at least until his wife gets that fiery look in her eye and he knows he best clean up for his own safety and well-being). Over the past few weeks of the first trimester blahs, though, I've definitely let my cleaning habits slip, so the apartment is pretty grody. (There's like six weeks worth of cracker crumbs stored up in our bed sheets, probably.) But (this is so gross...) the big one is that I haven't cleaned out the fridge a single time since my BFP. And I don't just mean I haven't wiped down the shelves, I mean I'm pretty sure I bought a cucumber, some apples, and quite a few other perishables over a month and a half ago that are still in there. I haven't touched the produce drawer for weeks, and I don't want to imagine what sort of vile ecosystem is growing in there... I'm trying not to think about it, and I'll probably just make H clean it all out once I'm ready to start using my refrigerator again.

shamrocandroll · April 2016

@HeyBooHey Yup... that's the gist of it. By making the decision for them, we're robbing them from having the ability to decide for themselves in the future, or something. I dunno. Again, I don't have a penis, so I don't feel like I have a right to have a strong opinion on the matter. Just like I don't think male politicians have any right to an opinion on what I should or should not do with my vagina.

grannysmith912 · April 2016

Oh, and another confession: I was supposed to be working on a freelance project today, but instead I've spent the browsing TB, reading birth stories, looking through my own baby pictures, eating cereal in my pjs, and trying to decide what lingerie I want to put on to seduce H with this evening... Winning at this whole discipline thing.

msu_gal · April 2016

@grannysmith912 good for you girl! My bloated butt does not feel like going near a piece of lingerie!

DunkinDecaf · April 2016

Haha so I already posted this but it just got even more ridiculous. My mom wanted to bake me a birthday cake because she's a cake snob, but what I really wanted was this chocolate ganache cake from my favorite bakery. So as not to hurt my moms feelings, I suggested we celebrate my birthday today instead of Sunday and planned to have the cake she would bake, rave about how wonderful it was, and not tell her about the other one. Then I ordered the cake from the bakery to be picked up and eaten Sunday with my mom none the wiser.

She just showed up to my house with a chocolate ganache cake from the bakery because she knew that was what I really wanted.
FFFC: I'm not canceling the order for the other identical cake I'm getting Sunday.

NatashaSprout · April 2016

I just convinced a police officer (he had a minor car accident) that we should take him away from the ghetto that I work in all the way downtown Chicago to the hospital that is next to the donut shop I wanted to go to. Not sorry.

butterkup-2 · April 2016

I had my 1st appointment on the 14th. We were really excited, until we found out that they would not do an US or check for heartbeat until the May 4th appointment. They took blood, and said the Dr. would go over results on the 4th. Seriously?! I called to request some sort of confirmation, and was asked if I had any concerns…Yes, I’m concerned that I have no symptoms other than being hungry every 45 minutes! Apparently, that wasn’t good enough for them, and was told to consider myself lucky. I really want to be excited about being pregnant, but I’m having a very hard time without some sort of confirmation that things are okay so far.
I was tempted to lie about symptoms, but don't want to rack up any bad karma.

grannysmith912 · April 2016

@NatashaSprout What's your go-to Chicago donut? I've only had Do-Rite, and I could eat 'em every day for the rest of my life, but I don't want to miss out on any other good ones before H and I leave Chicago this summer. I gotta eat all the donuts... I just gotta.

shamrocandroll · April 2016

@Butterkup I'm in the same boat. I'm hitting 12 weeks tomorrow, and still haven't even had blood drawn. The only things they did at my first appointment a month ago was had me pee in a cup and they did a pelvic exam. I finally have my u/s on Monday, and I can't wait!!! I feel like it's been an ETERNITY since I got my BFP 2 months ago! It'll be worth the wait, though! Hang in there!

NatashaSprout · April 2016

grannysmith912 said:

@NatashaSprout What's your go-to Chicago donut? I've only had Do-Rite, and I could eat 'em every day for the rest of my life, but I don't want to miss out on any other good ones before H and I leave Chicago this summer. I gotta eat all the donuts... I just gotta.

That's exactly where I needed to go!

ETA... Stans is really good too or Glazed and Confused. Then for cupcakes go to Molly's or Sprinkles.

grannysmith912 · April 2016

@NatashaSprout You da best.

whaat · April 2016

So on the circumcision topic.. What do we think? I really don't know. And my husband doesn't either. He is circumcised but doesn't *need* his son to be. I feel like I'll just let him lead on this decision but I wanted to hear what everyone else thought.
And for the record, as someone who was a bit of a dick connoisseur before I got married, there was no difference to me, so I don't think it's as much of a social awkwardness issue as people act like.

MrsBigTime · April 2016

In my 9 years of pediatric nursing experience, I've seen very little problems with penises in general, but none with circumcised penises. There have been fusing issues and uncleanliness issues with intact ones, but not an alarming number.

I honestly don't know what we'll do if this baby is a boy. My husband is cut, so my natural instinct is to say circumcise, but if DH had strong feelings about it one way or the other, I'd support his decision. I like the idea of cleanliness and not having to worry about retracting the foreskin ever, but not so much that I am opposed to any boy we may have being intact.

whaat · April 2016

MrsBigTime said:

In my 9 years of pediatric nursing experience, I've seen very little

Of?

ok I see it was a bump issue. Disregard.

shevaCC · April 2016

whaat said:

So on the circumcision topic.. What do we think? I really don't know. And my husband doesn't either. He is circumcised but doesn't *need* his son to be. I feel like I'll just let him lead on this decision but I wanted to hear what everyone else thought.
And for the record, as someone who was a bit of a dick connoisseur before I got married, there was no difference to me, so I don't think it's as much of a social awkwardness issue as people act like.

@whaat, just don't do what my DH did, lol. Before DS was born I told him I don't have a penis therefore was leaving the circumcision decision up to him. He refused to make a decision, which was going to end up with DS not being circumcised due to inaction (fine by me).

Then when DS was 6 weeks old he freaked out and decided it was vital that DS was circumcised after all. A 6 week old baby gets much more pissed off than a 2 day old baby when you cut his foreskin off. So I was upset to begin with since my poor sweet baby was inconsolable. Then his incision got infected and OMG I thought I was going to murder my DH. It cleared up quickly and is all fine now, but anyway, it's much better to make your decision right away, not a month+ after the fact.

banfrog · April 2016

@whaat We circumcised our sons. I know a couple nurses that worked with geriatric patients and the problems older uncircumcised men, especially with advanced dementia, tend to have with self care was enough to really consider it. It wasn't necessarily the the deciding factor but it helped. With my DS3 the pediatrician actually told us that she was glad we already decided on circumcision, not that she was pro circumcision but because in his particular case he would have had to have a circumcision eventually. The way his penis was, it was the perfect storm for chronic issues with UTIs and possible other infections. DH is cut and that was more so the deciding factor.

msu_gal · April 2016

Exactly what all these folks are saying about people having issues with them later in life. I had a friend's dad who was born in Europe and not circumcised got infected later in life and he was hospitalized for several days and hurt for weeks. Personally, I don't understand the argument for not doing it?

comealongponds · April 2016

@whaat DH is cut and he wants his sons to be as well...I don't have a penis so I don't feel strongly about it either way and since he does, I'm cool with that.

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