Reintro (loss)... because sometimes I suck.

KristoKekerooni · March 2016

I posted a while ago (several months) introducing myself, hoping to give and receive support in this hell of infertility. I then fell off the face of the Earth because I had a lot of issues and I needed to just "chill." My definition of "chill" was ignoring everything pregnancy/baby/infertility related. It didn't work. I mean, it sort of did. I relaxed (*gasp* dare I say that word?) and I was able to regain my (broken) composure. But, let's be real. You can't ignore the miracle of life.And by that I mean you can't ignore everyone else's miracle. So here I am. Back fo' realz.
Name's Kristin. I'm a chemist. I'll be 25 in a month. Married since September of 2014 and TTC since then. We did get pregnant three times (May, August, November) and had early m/c in each. We never technically had the pregnancies confirmed since they were early and I was working odd hours at the time (so difficult to get appointments outside 9-5!), so the doctors don't necessarily "count" those pregnancies. I am fairly certain they were "real" only because I had very dark pregnancy tests (none of those *squinters*) and I had symptoms that I'm certain weren't imaginary. When the bleeding started (period? m/c?) I was two weeks late, which has never, ever happened, since I have never had a period that wasn't 28 or 29 days in the last five years... but than again, who knows?
Anywho, We had testing in February. Mine came back normal (though we didn't investigate past the normal CD3 tests). My husband's SA, on the other hand, came back with some issues. Docs were surprised I ever was pregnant (If I was...?). His sperm count was 9.2 mill. Morphology (WHO standards) was 9%. The Motility was fine at 59%. Total sperm count was 36 mill. Uh-oh. So we have a repeat test in May and then off to a reproductive urologist (OMG, 4 hours away!).
We are at the beginning of our journey, but the docs are already talking about IUIs, IVFs, and adoption. Doesn't sound good, does it?

I sincerely pray that each lady on this board finds just what she wants. Infertility sucks, but the people I have met thus far make it almost (almost, but not quite, I think) worth it.

chickyclg · March 2016

Sorry for your losses, have you had a RPL? Even if the Dr doesn't "count" your losses you can still ask to have this panel done. If the dr refuses to order it you should find a new dr because that is unacceptable.

KristoKekerooni · March 2016

I've never heard of RPL testing. I did a quick Google search and just based on my five minutes of research, I think I have had most of the tests that are typically included in testing done at some point. The exception is the fetal testing, because we never were able to recover any tissue. There were a few I didn't recognize, so I'll definitely have to ask at my next appointment. Thanks for the tip, I sure appreciate it!
Sorry to see you've had a rough time (through your signature)... but congratulations on your success!!

Tulips29 · March 2016

Welcome (or welcome back) to this board. I don't have much advice to offer, but I hope you have success in your cycle...whether you chose IUI/IVF/etc. Sometimes we all need a break from it all to just clear our heads and be in the right state of mind to keep on going. I'm glad you were able to recharge and relax. Don't feel bad saying it, I am sure you feel a lot better now that you did. Good luck to you!

chickyclg · March 2016

MommyForTheFirstTime said:

I've never heard of RPL testing. I did a quick Google search and just based on my five minutes of research, I think I have had most of the tests that are typically included in testing done at some point. The exception is the fetal testing, because we never were able to recover any tissue. There were a few I didn't recognize, so I'll definitely have to ask at my next appointment. Thanks for the tip, I sure appreciate it!
Sorry to see you've had a rough time (through your signature)... but congratulations on your success!!

Thank you. I highly recommend it to everyone, we were able to catch my APS (a huge M/C factor) along with some other issues and get treatment to ultimately have a successful pregnancy. There tends to be a couple extra panels that they can do that can make a huge difference.

KristoKekerooni · March 2016

@chickyclg - It's funny you brought it up. I would think they would have tested because my GP thinks I have an autoimmune disorder due to some weird things that have been goin' on. Though I have had an ANA, but as I'm sure you know, lots of autoimmune things don't necessarily have a positive ANA. Like lupus. Anyway, I'll ask the docs.
@Tulips29 - I sure do feel better. After I squashed down the "oh no, I have wasted two perfectly fine months!!" and "what if the month I skipped was the month?" thoughts.... Thanks for your kind words. Sorry for yours struggles too. As much as I love all the ladies here, I hate that anyone is on this board at all. :'(

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Reintro (loss)... because sometimes I suck.

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