Would anyone be open to joining a future private November 2016 Bump Month Club group on Facebook?

zenway · March 2016

Perhaps once we get to the 2nd trimester?

comealongponds · March 2016

Way too early...too many crazies out there!

zenway · March 2016

Ha ha, good point @comealongponds! I am new to all of this and I just thought it might be more user-friendly and easier to keep track of people's post, replies, etc. I just wanted to gauge interest in the idea...perhaps we could make it a "once you make it to your 2nd trimester type thing".

RiverSong15 · March 2016

comealongponds said:

Way too early...too many crazies out there!

This^^ Too early. We had a thread about this last week I think. If you search the board, you should be able to find it.

Shawnee11507 · March 2016

Agree with too early yet

zenway · March 2016

I jumped the gun...perhaps we will revisit the idea. Thanks for the feedback. I am a novice.

doraleigh35 · March 2016

RiverSong15 said:

comealongponds said:

Way too early...too many crazies out there!

This^^ Too early. We had a thread about this last week I think. If you search the board, you should be able to find it.

This exactly^^. Search the board for the previous thread, there was a lot of feedback. I don't know if I would join even in 2nd Tri.

hellopartyof5 · March 2016

Also people will be more likely to join your FB group if they recognize your username. Even if this was in the future, I don't know who you are, and have no way to gauge if you're crazy!

zenway · March 2016

@nauticallife, I am not sure what you mean by making my username more "recognizable". I have purposely not added my actual name to my username percisely because of the "crazies", which I presume the same is true for you. I also do not plan to start a Facebook group, but would be happy to join one later on down the line if the group decided to create one for the November 2016 Bump Month Club. I wish that I could delete my poll, but it will not let me. I now see that this is not the time for such a poll. Thanks for your understanding. - D

Texafornian · March 2016

@zenway I think she meant that it would help to have a recognizable name as in "people have seen you around/posting/engaging a lot and therefore they recognize you as being the person starting a group etc." Its just waaaay too early and we don't know one another yet...

But I'm sure that will change! Welcome to the board.

DunkinDecaf · March 2016

@zenwayI don't think she means you should change your username, just that she doesn't recognize it now because she doesn't know you.

hellopartyof5 · March 2016

@zenway I mean take part in discussions. If people know more about you (like "Oh I've seen zenway talk on all the discussions and her lo is x weeks old right now and she loves teal.." or w/e) they're more likely to be ok sharing personal information with you, like their real names. Do you get what I mean?

ETA: they're/ their/ there

jdebaie · March 2016

I would be interested much further down the road, I just think it's too early right now.

zenway · March 2016

lol @nauticallife, @SRose109 & @Texafornian, gotcha! That makes way more sense to me. Just call me Amelia Bedelia...I am so literal, to a fault sometimes, with my electronic interpretations. Thanks for the clarification and for the tip. I just joined the group over the weekend and do plan on becoming more involved in the discussions once I figure everything out.

Thanks for the welcome @Texafornian.

Sheybre · March 2016

Pretty early. You will be surprised how many crazies we will weed through over the next several months

AlexLindzz · March 2016

We got one going in the 3rd tri in my last BMB...the crazies are (usually) long gone by then and it's a good way to see all of the new babies!

TucknBoom · March 2016

what does everyone mean by "crazies"?

talkthewholetime · March 2016

CassyColberg said:

what does everyone mean by "crazies"?

Stalkers, liars, cheats, theives, etc. (We had them all in my group)

PS you shoudl change your name so it isn't your name anymore.

comealongponds · March 2016

^^what she said

TheBorg7of9 · March 2016

Didn't we just talk about this?

talkthewholetime · March 2016

TheBorg7of9 said:

Didn't we just talk about this?

YUP. People need to lurk a little before jumping in.

NatashaSprout · March 2016

talkthewholetime said:

CassyColberg said:

what does everyone mean by "crazies"?

Stalkers, liars, cheats, theives, etc. (We had them all in my group)

PS you shoudl change your name so it isn't your name anymore.

Shoot my last BB 10 years ago had fake pregnancies, people that stole ultrasound pics, baby bellies, the good ones held out to 8 months and would have some financial crisis or awful sickness and people would send them things. Lots of crazies.

TucknBoom · March 2016

talkthewholetime said:

CassyColberg said:

what does everyone mean by "crazies"?

Stalkers, liars, cheats, theives, etc. (We had them all in my group)

PS you shoudl change your name so it isn't your name anymore.

It's my maiden name so I don't really see the issue with it. It's not the same name as my Facebook or any other social media.

comealongponds · March 2016

CassyColberg said:

talkthewholetime said:

CassyColberg said:

what does everyone mean by "crazies"?

Stalkers, liars, cheats, theives, etc. (We had them all in my group)

PS you shoudl change your name so it isn't your name anymore.

It's my maiden name so I don't really see the issue with it. It's not the same name as my Facebook or any other social media.

@CassyColberg I was curious so I searched your name on Facebook. I found your profile in about 2 seconds...and if I can do that, the crazies can do worse!

laurenlalap · March 2016

I prefer to live in my bubble and believe that everyone on this BMB is normal

TucknBoom · March 2016

comealongponds said:

CassyColberg said:

talkthewholetime said:

CassyColberg said:

what does everyone mean by "crazies"?

Stalkers, liars, cheats, theives, etc. (We had them all in my group)

PS you shoudl change your name so it isn't your name anymore.

It's my maiden name so I don't really see the issue with it. It's not the same name as my Facebook or any other social media.

@CassyColberg I was curious so I searched your name on Facebook. I found your profile in about 2 seconds...and if I can do that, the crazies can do worse!

Still not terribly worried. My Facebook is private and even if it wasn't what are they going to do?

TucknBoom · March 2016

I will change my user name because it seems to bother other people hahah.

Ally0221 · March 2016

CassyColberg said:

I will change my user name because it seems to bother other people hahah.

I don't think it bothers anyone, they're just trying to help you out. A lot of the ladies here have been on past BMB's and have experienced firsthand some of the scary/crazy that's out there. You'd be surprised to know what a computer savvy crazy person can do with your name and fb profile. Even if it's private. Luckily my BMB was pretty tame. But you just never know, ya know?

eta: words

TrulyBlessed22 · March 2016

CassyColberg said:

I will change my user name because it seems to bother other people hahah.

Ally0221 said:

I don't think it bothers anyone, they're just trying to help you out. A lot of the ladies here have been on past BMB's and have experienced firsthand some of the scary/crazy that's out there. You'd be surprised to know what a computer savvy crazy person can do with your name and fb profile. Even if it's private. Luckily my BMB was pretty tame. But you just never know, ya know?

@CassyColberg exactly this (bolded). The BMB's can be a wonderful place BUT unfortunately the reality is that there are a lot of "crazies" out there that are out to do wrong on here. They look for targets and have driven people off of social media completely because they have become stalkers, they find out your personal info, where you live etc etc. It sounds unreal but it's not and it's a very scary thing especially for someone who is expecting. With my 1st BMB we had some crazies and it taught me not to post my child's pic and to take my face out of HDBD pics. Again, I don't think anyone is trying to be snarky...I think they're genuinely trying to help you out.

talkthewholetime · March 2016

comealongponds said:

CassyColberg said:

talkthewholetime said:

CassyColberg said:

what does everyone mean by "crazies"?

Stalkers, liars, cheats, theives, etc. (We had them all in my group)

PS you shoudl change your name so it isn't your name anymore.

It's my maiden name so I don't really see the issue with it. It's not the same name as my Facebook or any other social media.

@CassyColberg I was curious so I searched your name on Facebook. I found your profile in about 2 seconds...and if I can do that, the crazies can do worse!

Yup, I did this too. I editied it out of my original post so I wouldn't sound creepy. Gald we're in this togethe

talkthewholetime · March 2016

CassyColberg said:

I will change my user name because it seems to bother other people hahah.

Please, do whatever the fuck you want. Just enjoy people commenting on your posts about feeding dogs vegan food and knowing where you live, etc. People are trying to help you. Stranger danger and all that? Your profile isn't private at all., literally every post is public, including your one 10 hours ago about your mom/little wayne.

The naivete is strong in this one.

LikeICantEven · March 2016

^^^ WSS. Some unsolicited advice, don't be so sensitive. It all comes from a place of trying to help protect you. Most of us from previous BMBs have been burned and let me tell you, it's sh*tty when your online life crosses into your real one. You can't predict how that will happen or how badly. Anonymity until the last trimester is the safest.

I will say, in my last group we had a process of how we allowed people in. They had to had a minimum post count here. It wasn't like hazing, or voting. You just had to have actively participated in order to be let in.

talkthewholetime · March 2016

HomeyDontPlayThat said:

I will say, in my last group we had a process of how we allowed people in. They had to had a minimum post count here. It wasn't like hazing, or voting. You just had to have actively participated in order to be let in.

We had that too. It was based on how long you had been around, how active, how often etc.

TucknBoom · March 2016

HomeyDontPlayThat said:

^^^ WSS. Some unsolicited advice, don't be so sensitive. It all comes from a place of trying to help protect you. Most of us from previous BMBs have been burned and let me tell you, it's sh*tty when your online life crosses into your real one. You can't predict how that will happen or how badly. Anonymity until the last trimester is the safest.

I will say, in my last group we had a process of how we allowed people in. They had to had a minimum post count here. It wasn't like hazing, or voting. You just had to have actively participated in order to be let in.

I see where ya'll are coming from but it doesn't bother me as much as it seems to bother other people. So for the sake of not having this conversation repeated everytime I post I changed it. It's not a matter of sensitivity since at no point was I offended.

MrsDramaK · March 2016

Just a little more unsolicited advice, I would never join a Facebook group with a bunch of strangers, it's no longer just MY privacy I'm protecting, there's also this hopeful future LO who needs to be looked out for since it'll be a long time before they can worry about their own internet privacy.

2undertwo2bee · March 2016

I don't really understand this either. Maybe I'm just blind to it. I dot. Really post that personal of stuff so what the concern. You girls got me wondering why I m even on here if it's that bad lol

GreenEyedUnicorn · March 2016

ewiltz1921 said:

I don't really understand this either. Maybe I'm just blind to it. I dot. Really post that personal of stuff so what the concern. You girls got me wondering why I m even on here if it's that bad lol

It can be that bad. You don't have to stay, if you don't want to. But we are just warning some of you that don't seem to realize there are twisted fucks out there that will try to ruin your life for LITTERALY no reason. You all can do you. We warned y'all.

TrulyBlessed22 · March 2016

@Ewiltz1921 in my old BMB there was one person who was personally "attacked" by another member. While I can't recall the specifics I know that it started with Private Messages and then escalated to being a lot more personal with home threats etc. The person was forced to get off The Bump as there was nothing that could be done and the authorities became involved. If you remain anonymous this won't happen to you but if you share your name and other personal info like exact town you live in etc then you're setting yourself up for an internet crazy to mess with your real life. It's not worth it and it can get dangerous. The board can be amazing but remain anonymous. That's all.

Hedgessm · March 2016

The BMB can be an amazing place to get support and meet people who understand what is happening in your life as far as the pregnancy. It's also an amazing place for drama. Sometimes funny, entertaining drama. But also so terrible people. By and large, people here are normal and worth getting to know. But the true crazies gotta go before you start putting a whole lot out there. You'd be surprised what people can do with the info you put online

2undertwo2bee · March 2016

I guess my question is how do you weed out the crazies? Why I third trimester more comfortable to join a group or share more info versus now? I'm geniounly curious so please don't think I'm being a sarcastic jerk because I'm def not trying to be lol.

thatlauragirl · March 2016

ewiltz1921 said:

I don't really understand this either. Maybe I'm just blind to it. I dot. Really post that personal of stuff so what the concern. You girls got me wondering why I m even on here if it's that bad lol

This is why. Because you're going to click with some of these mamas in ways you'll never expect. And six years later, you're going to love them like sisters and meet in person and maybe even run races together. Because they are your tribe. This is Lindsey, from my Sept. 2010 board. We've endured high risk pregnancies, miscarriages, raised our kids together and when I got my BFP she was the first person I went to because I knew how happy she would be for me.

On the flip side, though, there will probably be some crazies. We had one that actually managed to figure out where people worked from casual conversations and reported to their HR departments that they were using the Internet during work hours. There's always going to be a few of those. But as long as you're cautious like we're trying to be, you'll meet so many amazing people.

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Would anyone be open to joining a future private November 2016 Bump Month Club group on Facebook?

Would anyone be open to joining a future private November 2016 Bump Month Club group on Facebook? 81 votes

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