It's still early so I'm certain there will be many twatwaffles in my future but I just have to say something about this idiot that parks in my lot at work. She drives this HUGE Buick SUV. She can't fucking park the thing - ever. I've sat in my car and watched her come back from lunch and take 10 fucking minutes to fit the thing in a space and it is NEVER straight. She pulls in, she backs up, she pulls in, she backs up, and it's still as terrible as when she first pulled in. I parked next to her yesterday and left her the tiniest space to get in her door because she parked fucking crooked and all up on the line. I giggled. Get a car you can drive, idiot.
Daycare is a TW...picked up my son last night and he had a 2 inch, bright-red goose egg on his forehead!! My son has fell and hit his head at daycare before, but it's usually a very small bruise or something. This looked awful! Luckily he was acting normally and there was no cause to actually be concerned other than having to ice his forehead. But then, the daycare manager tried to turn it around as my fault by saying "he falls a lot, you should probably tell your pediatrician because he could really hurt himself if he keeps falling." . . .umm I'm pretty sure he fell because no one was watching him closely enough as he started trying to climb stuff he shouldn't be climbing. I know my son is a wild child but seriously, I have no control over what happens to him at daycare because I am NOT THERE. I'm not sure what his pediatrician can do about that either? Frustrating. To top it all off, DH was very upset about the incident. Ruined my evening. Thanks for nothing daycare.
My dog is a twatwaffle today - I love him to death but he has been driving me fucking bananas. He has to be touching me while he sleeps or he gets up and has to reposition himself constantly. This plus being so uncomfortable means I'm getting hardly any sleep - mama needs her sleep!
I hate when people don't cover their mouths to cough or they just don't give a shit. My TW is a co-worker also. She is such a moron. She will just sit around and look on Craigslist for jobs, or check out whatever else she feels like doing. She is incapable of multitasking so she can't be typing on the computer and answer the phone, and yesterday she claims she sprained her knee at one of her other jobs so she has to sit down more often but, she doesn't have it wrapped or have a brace on... Are you sure you're not just being lazier than usual?
TW is my husband today. We took a trip over the weekend and left one vehicle in his shop at work. We're supposed to be driving in to get my vehicle today. It's also story time day at the library. DD and I need to leave in 15 minutes to make it and his ass isn't up yet. So I'm not waking DD until I know he'll be up and ready to go in time.
My TW today is MH. I changed my, DS's and my mom's schedule for the week beginning yesterday so that I can now work from 7:30-3:30/4:00. This was per MH's request so that I could have time to pick up DS and get home in time to make dinner before MH gets home from work. I should just tell him that we don't live in the 1950s and to eat a frickin' snack, but whatever - this gives me more time in the afternoon/evening with DS, so I'm fine with it. I had dinner completely ready by 5:30. At 6, I text MH to find out when he's coming home, only to find he's not even leaving until 6:30. He finally got home at 7:15, says, "You didn't have to wait for me for dinner," then says he doesn't feel well and is just going to shower and go to bed. I had been waiting for him to get home because I had been having Braxton Hicks all damn afternoon/evening. But, no worries... I'll just clean up dinner that I made sure was ready for you and you didn't even touch, continue chasing our toddler around and do bedtime by myself, even though I'm not sure I can move my torso right now. Yea, I get he had a long day, but I'm too busy throwing myself a pity party.
TW is my neighbour walking his 16 week old puppy in the parking lot (in the rain) without a leash. The little guy was super cute but did not know and commands yet and was constantly dashing off the grassy area. Then he got pissed at me when my two dogs played with the puppy after it bounded across the lot to see them. What the hell?!?
My current TW is whatever has been getting into my chicken run and coop to kill/eat my chickens, no matter what I try to do to stop them. They're MY chickens... IF they're going to be eaten, *I* want to be the one to eat them! DH helped fortify the pen last night on one side, and the stupid varmint got in by tunneling under the other side of the pen and ate another chicken. At one point, I had a flock of 22 hens and 3 roosters. I now currently have 5 hens and 2 roosters. I have a trail cam that I'm putting up this afternoon, and we plan to put metal on the bottom of the outside of the rest of the pen this afternoon, but the animal needs to go find another food source besides mine!
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
My twatwaffle is my mother who is totally overstepping her boundaries. No, you will not dictate how we spend our weekends. No, we will not drive out of town every single long weekend there is because it's "family time" to you. DH and I both work many hours and sometimes we want our weekends to ourselves or to get things done at home. No, you will not just pick up DS and take him to your house for Easter weekend because for some reason you think it's more important that you color eggs and do egg hunts and activities than it is for his own parents to do with him. No, you may not buy DS a real bunny because they're soooooo cute. Step off, B! Sorry for worlds longest rant.
@sami784 Do you guys have a guard dog? We have foxes on our property but I have a visula mix that doesn't let anything down past the top of the driveway. The fox were very brazen when they were kits but after one summer they learned. I also didn't want them to get shot by some jerk either, with being so lax around people.
Me 28 DH 30 Married May 16th, 2015 EDD July 1st July16 May siggy challenge "May the Force be with you"
TW is my neighbour walking his 16 week old puppy in the parking lot (in the rain) without a leash. The little guy was super cute but did not know and commands yet and was constantly dashing off the grassy area. Then he got pissed at me when my two dogs played with the puppy after it bounded across the lot to see them. What the hell?!?
16 weeks is NOT old enough to be fully boostered. I say your neighbor is a twatwaffle for putting his dog at risk of getting sick.
One of my dogs it a pitbull type (all 3 dogs are GREAT, attentive and friendly, and kept on leash whenever outside), so I always get pissed when someone yells at me because their dog (or child, more often than not) ran up to greet my dogs, just because of the type of dog I have. One of my neighbors has this one-eyed, super crotchety tea-cup chihuahua that gets out at least once a week. This little shit always tries to attack my dogs (they just stare at the little fucker while he attempts to rip into their legs), and I scoop his yippy ass up and walk him straight to their front door. I'm sure I look amusing, 160 lbs of dog (split between 3 dogs) sitting quietly on leash while 3 lbs of tornado goes apeshit under one arm.
Okay. I was trying to not do this, but my students are being TWs.
We've been working on a project for TWO WEEKS and today is the LAST day. NOW they're all "I was absent! I don't get it! I don't have time!" NO, you were here enough to have done more than you have, and you spent ALL of your time (EVERY DAY) playing around, even when I kept trying to get you back on track or help you. And you have not asked me for help ONCE but you keep complaining. I don't care WHO you tell. Project better be finished today.
@oneliloaktree13 We don't have a dog outside, just a 150+ lb bullmastiff in the house. We've had a lot of bad luck with dogs being outside in the yard, as some people like to view our road as a race track since we're out in the middle of nowhere and I think I've seen one person actually get pulled over on our road in the 7 years I've lived here. I've thought about getting a livestock guardian dog, particularly if we end up with small ruminants as well in addition to the chickens and cows, but just haven't gotten one yet - mostly because of the traffic issue.
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
@KASG I used to deal with the same stuff when teaching high school English. I'd give the students more than ample time to work on research papers in class, including time to type and peer-revise them before the due date, and I'd still have some that'd be "But... but... but..." when the due date arrived and they had a half-completed research paper in their hands. It's frustrating, but think of it this way - not giving in is good preparation for college and the real world.
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
@KASG I used to deal with the same stuff when teaching high school English. I'd give the students more than ample time to work on research papers in class, including time to type and peer-revise them before the due date, and I'd still have some that'd be "But... but... but..." when the due date arrived and they had a half-completed research paper in their hands. It's frustrating, but think of it this way - not giving in is good preparation for college and the real world.
EXACTLY!!!! And it's never too early a lesson to learn (I have middle schoolers now...)
@Nerdchild Being off leash drives me nuts. My elder dog could be off leash and listen, the pup is mostly there but we only do it in appropriate areas, like the fenced in dog park across the street, because we live in a major city and things can happen. Not to mention the reactions of other dogs and people. I am honestly a one minute walk from a major road, it would be so easy and terrible for a dog to get hit by one of the many cars.
Another TW.. though this might go more into the WTF category - my MIL just had my SIL call me and ask if DS is home sick today because I posted pictures in an album on Facebook earlier (today's a very slow day at the office and I was taking a short break from the very little that I have to do today). No, MIL, not quite - the pictures were from this past weekend and last night. She'd have figured it out if she'd have noticed the fact that our outfits change 4 different times over the course of the eight photos... I'm the one that has to do laundry in the house and no one is changing that many times in one day if I've any say in it.
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
My dog is also the TW...and he hasn't even been home for almost two weeks (and wont be home for another week). We sent him away for three weeks to a trainer, to do a crash course. Anyway, he is five, and his biggest fault is that he loses his mind in the kennel. He will sleep in it perfectly fine at night, but if we need to go somewhere as a family (or if there is a gap in one of us needing to be home with him), he has to go to my IL's and be watched or he will shred his wire kennel, destroy his teeth, etc. My IL's don't mind, and they live next door, but I think that it is ridiculous and that the dog needs to get his sh*t together and learn to deal with the kennel for 2-4 hour spans. I would like to be able to go somewhere for a few hours with my family, without having to make sure that IL's are home and can take the creature. So my TW is the fact that the trainer is having a REALLY hard time with him and the kennel. He is almost two weeks in, and there has been little to no progress in the kennel area, unless the trainer has her other dog in the kennel room (as a comfort companion). I am not getting another dog, just for our dog to deal with the kennel. F*ck the previous owners of our dog, who spent five years not training him!
ETA: Also, the whole thing just blows, because if he still isn't kennel trained by the end of this, we spent $3k to teach him how to sit, stay, and walk without pulling.
@sami1784 Ahhh, yeah that makes a huge difference. I'm in the middle of no where, dirt road then our driveway is a 1/4 mile long. I completely get the worry about the race track like main road.
Me 28 DH 30 Married May 16th, 2015 EDD July 1st July16 May siggy challenge "May the Force be with you"
The fact that all I can eat without feeling like I'm going to die is chicken nuggets and waffles is my TW. I'm so goddamn sick of both things, but anytime I try something new I pay dearly for days afterward. Effing HG.
My dog is also the TW...and he hasn't even been home for almost two weeks (and wont be home for another week). We sent him away for three weeks to a trainer, to do a crash course. Anyway, he is five, and his biggest fault is that he loses his mind in the kennel. He will sleep in it perfectly fine at night, but if we need to go somewhere as a family (or if there is a gap in one of us needing to be home with him), he has to go to my IL's and be watched or he will shred his wire kennel, destroy his teeth, etc. My IL's don't mind, and they live next door, but I think that it is ridiculous and that the dog needs to get his sh*t together and learn to deal with the kennel for 2-4 hour spans. I would like to be able to go somewhere for a few hours with my family, without having to make sure that IL's are home and can take the creature. So my TW is the fact that the trainer is having a REALLY hard time with him and the kennel. He is almost two weeks in, and there has been little to no progress in the kennel area, unless the trainer has her other dog in the kennel room (as a comfort companion). I am not getting another dog, just for our dog to deal with the kennel. F*ck the previous owners of our dog, who spent five years not training him!
ETA: Also, the whole thing just blows, because if he still isn't kennel trained by the end of this, we spent $3k to teach him how to sit, stay, and walk without pulling.
Have you thought about medications? Sometimes as they age they can develop anxiety disorders, like elderly humans. Especially certain breed types. My GSD is 8 and has developed severe storm anxiety. We had to get a new washing machine and he's TERRIFIED of it. Has to be outside in our backyard the entire time I'm washing clothes. We've had to resort to prosac, as his storm anxiety medication wasn't cutting it for that.
Last night's sleep was my twatwaffle. Pregnancy insomnia has me grumpy already and lacking decent sleep. I was wide awake most of the night, husband was snoring and wouldn't roll over no matter how much I was shaking (punching) him, anxious deaf puppy was screaming at the foot of the bed because husband wasn't snuggling him the right way (and couldn't hear me calling him obviously), and the other dog was barking at the dark. I was SO close to losing my shit. I might sleep in the guest room tonight to try and get at least a few solid hours of sleep. Oh and my skin decided to suddenly take on an intense rosy red glow to my cheeks. I look like I am non-stop embarrassed. Doc said its just a joy of pregnancy and everything's fine but it looks terrible. Wah!
It's still early so I'm certain there will be many twatwaffles in my future but I just have to say something about this idiot that parks in my lot at work. She drives this HUGE Buick SUV. She can't fucking park the thing - ever. I've sat in my car and watched her come back from lunch and take 10 fucking minutes to fit the thing in a space and it is NEVER straight. She pulls in, she backs up, she pulls in, she backs up, and it's still as terrible as when she first pulled in. I parked next to her yesterday and left her the tiniest space to get in her door because she parked fucking crooked and all up on the line. I giggled. Get a car you can drive, idiot.
I went to Wegmans yesterday to grab some lunch. I parked right up next to this Mercedes SUV parked so crooked, they had absolutely NO consideration for the 2 spaces on either side whatsoever. WHY WOULD THEY?! I was bummed they didn't see how "spitefully" on top of them I was by the time I came back. To make me laugh even more, struggling to get out of the car with my pregnant self (and I mean there was maybe 12 inches between my door squeezing open to shimmy out and their car door) I walk past the handicap parking and a senior couple attempting to park scrapped their front end undercarriage parking too close to the shrubs in front of the store. I muttered CHRIST to myself! #twatwafflesunite
I try not to judge people, but if it's rush hour on the el in Chicago and you think your backpack deserves its own seat and wait for someone to ask you to move it I am 100% going to assume you're a selfish jackass TW who deserves a stern side eye.
@mkl1010 I'm fairly confident have the people I see on the subway everyday are twatwaffles. Between taking extra seats, excessive perfume and snotty germs flying everywhere I am generally pissy by the time I get to work
@weville yes and yes! My tolerance has gone way down for this kind of behavior. Why is it so hard for people to just be considerate? Don't even get me started on manspreading lol
I'm the TW. Have you guys ever royally messed up on bills? I seriously thought I was on top of everything right now but it appears that I wasn't. I'm basically sick about it and want to stop taking care of the bills in our household until after the baby comes. It's hard enough to keep everything straight at work much less what bills are due when lol.... Maybe I just need to get my shit together.
Re: Twatwaffle Tuesday
July BMB May Signature Challenge
DD #2: EDD July 2016
Married May 16th, 2015
EDD July 1st
July16 May siggy challenge "May the Force be with you"
And dh is supporting me either way.
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
Voted "Mom of the Year" 2012 Sweetpea Mom Awards
Sorry for worlds longest rant.
Married May 16th, 2015
EDD July 1st
July16 May siggy challenge "May the Force be with you"
One of my dogs it a pitbull type (all 3 dogs are GREAT, attentive and friendly, and kept on leash whenever outside), so I always get pissed when someone yells at me because their dog (or child, more often than not) ran up to greet my dogs, just because of the type of dog I have. One of my neighbors has this one-eyed, super crotchety tea-cup chihuahua that gets out at least once a week. This little shit always tries to attack my dogs (they just stare at the little fucker while he attempts to rip into their legs), and I scoop his yippy ass up and walk him straight to their front door. I'm sure I look amusing, 160 lbs of dog (split between 3 dogs) sitting quietly on leash while 3 lbs of tornado goes apeshit under one arm.
We've been working on a project for TWO WEEKS and today is the LAST day. NOW they're all "I was absent! I don't get it! I don't have time!" NO, you were here enough to have done more than you have, and you spent ALL of your time (EVERY DAY) playing around, even when I kept trying to get you back on track or help you. And you have not asked me for help ONCE but you keep complaining. I don't care WHO you tell. Project better be finished today.
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
Voted "Mom of the Year" 2012 Sweetpea Mom Awards
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
Voted "Mom of the Year" 2012 Sweetpea Mom Awards
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
Voted "Mom of the Year" 2012 Sweetpea Mom Awards
ETA: Also, the whole thing just blows, because if he still isn't kennel trained by the end of this, we spent $3k to teach him how to sit, stay, and walk without pulling.
Married May 16th, 2015
EDD July 1st
July16 May siggy challenge "May the Force be with you"
July BMB May Signature Challenge
My constant runny nose, relentless cough and the 2.5 hours of sleep I got last night are all super huge twatwaffles.
Oh and my skin decided to suddenly take on an intense rosy red glow to my cheeks. I look like I am non-stop embarrassed. Doc said its just a joy of pregnancy and everything's fine but it looks terrible. Wah!
To make me laugh even more, struggling to get out of the car with my pregnant self (and I mean there was maybe 12 inches between my door squeezing open to shimmy out and their car door) I walk past the handicap parking and a senior couple attempting to park scrapped their front end undercarriage parking too close to the shrubs in front of the store. I muttered CHRIST to myself! #twatwafflesunite
edited: spelling
July BMB May Signature Challenge
"uhhh well I would fucking hope so, ya know, the whole growing a human thing" would have been my response. People are such dicks.
July BMB May Signature Challenge