@JennM205 It's a silent "do as your told" situation, they allow us to speak up about changes like this but they don't do well with what they perceive as the paras trying to take it upon themselves to make decisions. I completely agree that as time goes on I won't be able to do the physical part of the job nearly as effectively and that's another reason why this swap does not make sense to me. If I'm being honest though the child I'm with as of right now has come so far from where they were at the beginning of the year and we have so many more goals to reach that I would hate to hand it off to someone else.
Yes that's mine and DH anniversary, it's four months after the anniversary of when we started dating 4/22/07 and 11 days after my parents anniversary, I was so worried about an August date as the weather in Vermont at the end of summer can be so unpredictable!
@JSAH082215 No way. I would have them assign you to another child. Before I decided to stay home I worked as a mental health tech at a children's behavioral health hospital and I dealt with aggressive children every day. I was not allowed to be involved in any restraints or 1 on 1 physical altercations with the patients after I got pregnant though. If the child became aggressive with you, then there is a chance of you losing your balance and falling if not something worse. You can't be expected to handle a situation like that while pregnant. I ended up leaving work a month before DD was born because a patient threatened to punch me in the uterus. Nope. I would express your discomfort and concern for your safety.
My bitchfest today has to do with the trip I'm currently on for work. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to be in some warm weather for the week, but the problem is with my living arrangements. I'm staying with 3 people I work with IN A HOUSE, not even my own hotel room. Normally, this would be great, but we all know the pregnancy bloat/gas can be so real. I was able to finagle myself through last night through a strategically draped sweater, since the bloat was so big last night I looked about 6 months pregnant. I am also praying that I can keep the gas under wraps, because this could get ugly really fast! At least when I'm at home, my DH understands that it's a pregnancy symptom and I really can't help it... but here it's a little bit different, especially since they don't know I'm pregnant yet, and I really don't want to be known around the office as the gassy one. Wish me luck, ladies!
Thanks for the support, ladies! I am going to have to put my foot down and kick DH out of bed tonight. I would go to the guest room but I've got some neuromuscular issues and we set up our bed so I can have minimal discomfort or my symptoms will get worse. If he doesn't go tonight, I'll definitely go though. He is such an attentive and sweet guy so it really annoys me that he's not seeing my side of this, for some reason. I think he sees this whole thing as an abstract situation until the baby gets here. I've even told him that I can't afford to get dehydrated or a high fever as I could end in the hospital but he just doesn't seem to get that it's a real possibility. Ughl
@JSAH082215 I know this is a easier said than done situation your in. You are already in the position of you being volun-told so in my opinion it wouldnt hurt to have a discussion over the swap with your superiors. I would even discuss it the exact (but more professional) way you did here. Mention your progress with the current child and how you believe it may be detrimental (That may be a strong word to use?) in their progress for you to leave at the moment. However they may use maternity leave on you with that statement. Either way pointing out how one person has been sent to the hospital by said child it wouldnt be wise to have the pregnant paras with this child. If they wont budge on this then maybe see if you have a union in your state and with that job?
My bitchfest today is my husband. I've had terrible MS and food aversions for the past 6 weeks. I haven't been cooking dinner because I just can't handle the food/ smells. I wasn't sick with my first pregnancy so he thinks I'm just exaggerating or being lazy. He constantly asks me when I'm gonna stop being sick. idk jerk off, if I had a choice I would feel better now, but I don't so leave me alone and make your own dinner!
Dear husband, your lack of efficiency with getting shit done drives me insane. Explain to me why going to the gym and Target couldn't both be done in the 3.5 hours you had between getting out of work and picking up our daughter, today. Signed, your exhausted wife who worked 14 hours today and doesn't need to hear you complaining about how you didn't have time to get both done today
Rant over. Needed to get it out so I don't yell at him because he is taking on more with our daughter this week because I'm on trial and my work hours are insane.
@TheTamedShrew I will definitely be voicing my concern more about my safety and frankly the safety of the kids, like you said once my center of balance goes wonky and I'm being expected to try to handle a physical situation who knows who I could fall on. I think I gave them a slightly astonished look when they told me about the switch because they then said "don't worry, they have never punched someone in the stomach before" oh thanks guys, that got me right on board!
@Smashbox29 I really do think it would set the progress back, it took the child I'm with now a long time to really trust the directions I was trying to take them in. We did a swap for a day and it was a disaster, it's all about the routine and we've had one for 6 months, I just don't see what good could come of it. I'm sure if I stress it enough they will reluctantly let this go. The other para doesn't want to switch either regardless of the things that have happened so I have that on my side as well.
Thank you ladies so much! I have a meeting tomorrow to discus the possible changes and I feel much more prepared and level headed for it! I don't know what would have happened if I had gone in with all of this pent up, probably lots of frustrated tears (although that's still always a possibility, thanks hormones!)
After an absolutely amazing day at Harry Potter Land yesterday, I got rear ended at the Orange/San Diego county line as I was driving home. It was so scary and so stressful but I'm ok and was able to drive for 45 more minutes to my parents house. My car lost its bumper which is currently sitting in my back seat. I went to the doctor today and heard the baby's heart beat and everything is fine. My MBF (besides the car accident) is that I spent my one day off today bouncing between my OB and my GP and then had to spend about 2 hours on the phone with the car insurance and my health insurance. Turns out the lab I've been going to has not been sending my blood work results to my doctors so I had to spend about another hour trying to get ahold of someone to make sure they send the results to my doctor.
My MBF is about a recliner. Yes, a chair. Petty, I know...but let me start from the beginning...
Long story short, we let my BIL move in five months ago to help him transition from a year abroad to a regular, contributing member of society. We thought it would be pretty short term. Five months later, he's still living with us, not paying a dime and considers "doing his part" around the house to be emptying the dishwasher about once a week and that's it. All of that is bitch-worthy in it's own right but it's not until recently that I've felt my fury unleash...and over a stupid recliner, no less!
About a month ago, DH fixed our wifi so that it's strong across the whole house (rather than just in our office like it was before). BIL promptly went from "working" in the office to setting up shop in our living room...in the ONLY spot in the ENTIRE house where I can sit comfortably right now. He has claimed the recliner 100%. If he's not sitting there, he leaves his laptop, water bottle, snacks, etc so that I would have to move them in order to sit down. He sits there all day, all evening and even all night. Last night, DH and I wanted to watch TV after DH went to bed and I was forced to sit on the sofa and couldn't get comfortable. I considered just going to bed but, let's be real, I'm not comfortable there
Had a cold all weekend and it sucked not being able to take anything managed to get over it in about 3 days with lots of rest, humidifier, and tea with honey and lemon.
2nd rant- My SIL sent me a text when I had my first US back at 6 weeks saying 'OMG OMG SO EXCITED PLEASE MAKE ME THE GODMOTHER!'...I'm sorry, what?! I was shocked. She's always been pushy but that really stuck with me. My husband didn't think it was inappropriate and couldn't understand why I was so upset. Well fast forward to Saturday night. Hubby and I went out for dinner and baptism came up and it ended in a huge argument. We are at a stalemate and neither one of us will budge. He says she will absolutely be godmother and I say she willl not. She's the kind of girl that will text me every day to say, 'you need to bring my godchild over to see me today. They are my godchild.'
Sorry, long rant. It's just really been hard to deal with. Idk if part of it is just my hormones being wacky but I think about it every day and I'm starting to resent my husband for not understanding my concerns and feelings.
Current BF: I'm sitting waiting for an ultrasound and I HAVE TO PEE! Ahhhhhh! I have to wait until after the u/s so they can get a good look. I didn't have enough in my bladder last time. Hurry up, people!
*************************************** FORMER USERNAME:@runningisrad
@runningisrad Is this a later u/s thing? For both that I had early on, I was told to make sure my bladder was totally voided so that it wouldn't show up and get in the way. Not sure I'm going to like the full-bladder experience...I see accidental pee on the horizon...
@runningisrad@JabreenI had to have a full bladder yesterday for my US (12 w, 4 d). That being said, the little nugget wasn't in the right position so after taking initial measurements, they had me empty my bladder and see if that would help move the baby around. Eventually got all that was needed, but the baby did not want to play, lol.
@PoodleDoodleOoo Sorry about what you Mother in law said to you, I know what you mean about her, I had similar story happen When we announced our pregnancy to my in-laws the very first thing she said was "Is it for real this time?" (referring to our loss in August)
I had no idea what the fuck to say to that, like I cannot even know that and I am stressed enough as it is.
@UnwritteN12 So sorry about your losses, sending you big internet hugs.
35 years old, TTC #1 Dec 28, 2011 PCOS, Hypothyroidism.
First IVF cycle June 5th 2015 --- BFP Miscarriage at 8 weeks
FET December 15th 2015--- BFP! First saw at 6w4d It's a boy!
Luciano Alessandro Maximiliano was born on September 3rd 2016
@runningisrad@JabreenI had to have a full bladder yesterday for my US (12 w, 4 d). That being said, the little nugget wasn't in the right position so after taking initial measurements, they had me empty my bladder and see if that would help move the baby around. Eventually got all that was needed, but the baby did not want to play, lol.
That is EXACTLY what happened today! They were measuring the nuchal fold, baby would not cooperate and she said she didn't want to mash too hard because my bladder was SO full. She had me go pee and then tried again. Still took her a minute because apparently baby decided to take a snooze, but she eventually got her measurements.
*************************************** FORMER USERNAME:@runningisrad
@runningisrad Is this a later u/s thing? For both that I had early on, I was told to make sure my bladder was totally voided so that it wouldn't show up and get in the way. Not sure I'm going to like the full-bladder experience...I see accidental pee on the horizon...
It was a nuchal fold test. I ended up having to go pee because my bladder was super full, and she didn't want to push too hard LOL
*************************************** FORMER USERNAME:@runningisrad
@Jabreen You'll have to have a full bladder for any abdominal exams. I think they recommend drinking 32 oz before you come in. That said, I had 4 abdominal u/s with my first, and I was always either told I needed to or was allowed to go empty my bladder before it was done. It is torture until they let you go pee.
@PoodleDoodleOoo Sorry about what you Mother in law said to you, I know what you mean about her, I had similar story happen When we announced our pregnancy to my in-laws the very first thing she said was "Is it for real this time?" (referring to our loss in August)
I had no idea what the fuck to say to that, like I cannot even know that and I am stressed enough as it is.
@UnwritteN12 So sorry about your losses, sending you big internet hugs.
Honey there are no words. People who haven't experienced a loss have no clue about how you feel, let alone exactly what NOT to say. Since its your MIL have hubby deal with it. Hopefully it will stave off the impending slap - fest that deserved
@TheTamedShrew@runningisrad my husband is a serial not feeling well one-upper. Through all of my morning sickness nausea and first trimester fatigue, his was "worse," somehow...... No idea how I have resisted the temptation to murder him through it all.
@alyeena et al, that's seriously messed up. I am so sorry.
I feel sort of similar, with my Mom saying things like, can I tell Grandma yet? After last time, I am just not sure if I should... This following a loss at 11 weeks in July, a couple of days after telling the whole family. It's like, sorry to disappoint you by miscarrying, Mom. I think she means sort of (?) well, but it is insensitive at the very best.
@runningisrad@camichael84@LakeR2014 Thanks for the info. Interesting that depending on the scan type/timing the bladder-status would vary. Plus, I'm sure they are used to accidents, being an office that deals with pregnant women
@Alyeena I can't even... That reaction sounds like one of my horrible vivid pregnancy dreams. I'm still smarting for a less insensitive comment my mom made about how I just needed to get pregnant (to solve some childcare timing issue with my daughter). It was right before we found out that I was, but it's not like she didn't know we'd been having issues. It'd be harder to let that go from a MIL!
Re: Monday Bitchfest 3/7
Yes that's mine and DH anniversary, it's four months after the anniversary of when we started dating 4/22/07 and 11 days after my parents anniversary, I was so worried about an August date as the weather in Vermont at the end of summer can be so unpredictable!
First time mom to a human but have been a puppy mamma for over 12 years
@JSAH082215 I know this is a easier said than done situation your in. You are already in the position of you being volun-told so in my opinion it wouldnt hurt to have a discussion over the swap with your superiors. I would even discuss it the exact (but more professional) way you did here. Mention your progress with the current child and how you believe it may be detrimental (That may be a strong word to use?) in their progress for you to leave at the moment. However they may use maternity leave on you with that statement. Either way pointing out how one person has been sent to the hospital by said child it wouldnt be wise to have the pregnant paras with this child. If they wont budge on this then maybe see if you have a union in your state and with that job?
I wish you the best with both children!
Me:24 ~~~~~ DH:26
High school Sweethearts 03/29/07
Engaged 11/29/2009
Married 09/04/2012
TTC#1-06/01/2015
BFP 12/27/2015 EDD 9/8/2016
It's a BOY!
@Smashbox29 I really do think it would set the progress back, it took the child I'm with now a long time to really trust the directions I was trying to take them in. We did a swap for a day and it was a disaster, it's all about the routine and we've had one for 6 months, I just don't see what good could come of it. I'm sure if I stress it enough they will reluctantly let this go. The other para doesn't want to switch either regardless of the things that have happened so I have that on my side as well.
Thank you ladies so much! I have a meeting tomorrow to discus the possible changes and I feel much more prepared and level headed for it! I don't know what would have happened if I had gone in with all of this pent up, probably lots of frustrated tears (although that's still always a possibility, thanks hormones!)
2nd rant- My SIL sent me a text when I had my first US back at 6 weeks saying 'OMG OMG SO EXCITED PLEASE MAKE ME THE GODMOTHER!'...I'm sorry, what?! I was shocked. She's always been pushy but that really stuck with me. My husband didn't think it was inappropriate and couldn't understand why I was so upset. Well fast forward to Saturday night. Hubby and I went out for dinner and baptism came up and it ended in a huge argument. We are at a stalemate and neither one of us will budge. He says she will absolutely be godmother and I say she willl not. She's the kind of girl that will text me every day to say, 'you need to bring my godchild over to see me today. They are my godchild.'
Sorry, long rant. It's just really been hard to deal with. Idk if part of it is just my hormones being wacky but I think about it every day and I'm starting to resent my husband for not understanding my concerns and feelings.
BFP: 12/29/15 EDD: 9/15/16!! Please be our miracle baby!
FORMER USERNAME: @runningisrad
I had no idea what the fuck to say to that, like I cannot even know that and I am stressed enough as it is.
@UnwritteN12 So sorry about your losses, sending you big internet hugs.
PCOS, Hypothyroidism.
Miscarriage at 8 weeks
First saw
It's a boy!
FORMER USERNAME: @runningisrad
FORMER USERNAME: @runningisrad
I feel sort of similar, with my Mom saying things like, can I tell Grandma yet? After last time, I am just not sure if I should... This following a loss at 11 weeks in July, a couple of days after telling the whole family. It's like, sorry to disappoint you by miscarrying, Mom. I think she means sort of (?) well, but it is insensitive at the very best.
made about how I just needed to get pregnant (to solve some childcare timing issue with my daughter). It was right before we found out that I was, but it's not like she didn't know we'd been having issues. It'd be harder to let that go from a MIL!