Tough day! Serious family illness

BaylieGirl · March 2016

I just found out my mother-in-law had a serious stroke. It makes my loss so much more real now knowing that I was a failure at being able to provide her a grandchild that she would be properly able to know and love. Why does it always seem that everything goes wrong at once? Now I don't know if it's still a good time to keep TTC with everything that is going on and knowing we won't have the support we thought we would if we have a baby. I'm 38 so the clock is ticking. I wish I could go back in time and tell my 24 year old self to wise up at to what are truly the important things in life. Ugh.

m6agua · March 2016

Sorry for your loss and you MIL health. Right after my mc I was sick, a family member lost their 3 dogs unexpectedly, then a family friend lost their infant. It was a lot to process. Once the last event happened about a month after my mc I decided to seek the help of a counselor. That helped me a lot.

catiecatp · March 2016

my heart goes out to you @BaylieGirl and @m6agua

AL_TwinCities · March 2016

I'm so sorry you are going through all of this!

BornReady · March 2016

Oh no, so sorry to hear about how hard things have been.

cooaladoll · March 2016

I'm sorry to hear how it's been so rough for you. You aren't a failure in anything. Nature just had different timing.

mylittleversailles · March 2016

I'm sorry things are so rough right now. You aren't failing. You are doing your best. Family illnesses are so stressful, never mind any of the rest, so please do your best to take care of yourself.

roper2617 · March 2016

Sorry that things are so brutal for you right now.

beff12 · March 2016

I'm so sorry to hear about your MIL. Please don't blame yourself. Thinking of you guys!

chloe97 · March 2016

@BaylieGirl I'm so sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. I just want to let you know that you aren't alone with your thoughts about TTCAL and being older. I have struggles with feeling shame related to be almost 37 and TTC. My dads health is failing quickly and though I never counted on his help, I do wonder if my children will remember him or even meet him.

I encourage you to give it a lot of thought and maybe talk to an RE before you give up completely. As much as it's draining to deal with an ailing parent, letting their health struggles get in the way of your family planning may be something you regret deeply down the road. Take it one day at a time and just know we are all here to listen to you when you need to vent! Good luck!

silentP · March 2016

I'm so sorry to hear this. As hard as it might be, please don't beat yourself up further about not having had a child yet. You're not a failure and it's not your fault.