Disappointments — The Bump
Parenting

Disappointments

Just random, but I still can't get over what my spouse said to me earlier. We've been together roughly since 2008 but just married last July. So we know each other fairly well. So...it started at church I felt light-headed during last part of church. I had a granola bar, egg,cheese and sausage taco, then full glass of orange juice and a toast with cream cheese all for breakfast. He complained I'm not eating good enough and all I ate was not a filling meal at all. I'm about 26wks along and after all that felt absolutely overstuffed. He keeps on me saying I didn't eat good enough yesterday which I guess was fair I had granola bar breakfast. 2 hot dogs for lunch and then dinner 2 tortillas with beef strips and meat but still I was full! And says I need to stop being selfish and eat something else. I'm not eve hungry. And he gets mad saying well you not hungry but you need to eat. I eat when I'm hungry I don't overdue it because then I feel sick and miserable. I know my damn body. Then he still continues to argue in car way after church saying he will forever blame me if our unborn daughter comes out flaw because I'm not eating good enough. I take my prenatals every day and iron pills doctor prescribed me. I like to each fresh fruit and veggies and not so much meat but whatever is not good enough or enough. At this pint I wanted to cry. Fast forward, we get home and going with his family to walk on beach just to get out. He says we won't leave till I actually eat some food. I'm stuffed to Mac and miserable already. But I want to go to beach. So I fix a sandwhich eat a plum but don't eat sandwhich but bring in car and brings up again telling me I better eat. I want to cry I'm full and don't want it. He yells and asks our 8year daughter in back seat if she wants it. She does and eats it. Who the hell has the right to force me to eat when I'm not hungry...and all this started because I got light headed towards end of church because not like my daughter inside like to cut off my lungs and make me super uncomfortable in church....I just don't know how to feel. I feel like a failure day in and out and sick of it. Every doc visit I'm healthy and she's growing right on schedule... I'm so sick of being pregnant I hate it more when things like this happen...what do I do? I'm just a disappointment...

Re: Disappointments

  • SmrBrd2012SmrBrd2012 member
    edited February 2016
    If your doc says you're growing fine then that's it. End of story. Tell your husband to chill out. Your baby only needs 300 additional calories per day from what you would normally eat and even if you don't get the extra 300, baby will take what she needs. It sounds like you're eating just fine. Can you make him go to your next doc appointment with you? He sounds awfully controlling. I hope it's just because he's irrationally concerned but it really bothers me.
    ondabiancawintersong
  • He has gone to every single Doc Appt...he just makes me so mad. And then I just hate absolutely everything! And then I literally want could careless about the baby I get so frustrated. Like all my happiness is drained and I just feel numb and I have no friends where we live. I can't wait next month to leave back home to Oklahoma to visit my friends for weekend...I just want nothing to do with him. My stomach been so hard and hurting me all day today since and I hate it all...
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  • I'm so sorry that's awful! Don't let him drain the enjoyment of being pregnant for you. You're doing amazing! It's not okay for him to say these things to you, it's mentally and emotionally abusive. And if you're not feeling well do not eat just to appease him. The stress he's putting you under us WAY more damaging to your body than food. My husband was concerned for me because I was sick in my first trimester and could hardly eat a thing,but dr always said it was fine and the baby takes what they need! He was worried about my energy levels but trusted my doc and my knowledge of my own body and feelings. There's a difference between concern and just being controlling. Is he like this in other situations or is this a new thing? Can you and he talk to a marriage counselor? Sounds like you already have a child, did he do this last time too? Put your foot down , it's your body and you're doing perfect growing a human in there!! Keep up the good work and stay positive stay strong!! 
    wintersongvibarra27
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