I think you like the attention and aren't really as concerned about it as you are making us believe. If you were really that uncomfortable you would switch doctors. But it sounds to me like you like thinking that this doctor is attracted to "smoking hot" women like yourself, and perhaps this post is just turning into a humblebrag.
YES. This is how it read to me too and for the sake of objectivity i didn't bring it up. I mean it was just a series of non issues punctuated by "subtle" hints of how head over heels he probably was for her.
Op if you actually think this is the case, ditch him. But if you haver a thing for him or need the ego boost (and who doens't with our postpartum physiques and russian roulette hormones)... maybe all you can see is nails because you're holding such a big hammer..
Thanks everyone. Really. All of this has given me some much needed perspective for something I'm been trying to process over the past few days before my next appt at the end of the week.
You've asked us for our opinions and have gotten them. Everyone except for you and your husband thinks you should find a different doctor.
This is thread is turning into the hot mess express.
I also don't ever think about whether a doctor may or may not be attracted to me... Why you ask? Because it is highly inappropriate and I don't believe in fostering such thoughts.
My advice is to move on and choose a different doctor with whom there is ZERO sexual tension on either party's part.
Yeah I guess if I'm honest with my self I know what the right answer is but I wish it wasn't that way and that it could be something that we could get past.
I was going to refrain from commenting further, but this is just insane. "Something we could get past"???? WTF? Literally all that happened was you *assuming* this guy has an attraction to you. There is NOTHING to get past. Nothing. You have made up this scenario in your head where this young, attractive, affluent GYN has had a series of brief encounters with you all culminating in a post partum physical exam where he fumbled and blushed and you had a racing heart beat and a case of nerves. You have fabricated this entire scenario in your head and you either a) need professional help or b) are a class A attention seeker. Only a crazy person (or someone looking for cheap thrills) would entertain the thought of continuing their care with that doctor.
No one here has ever had this experience because IT IS NOT A NORMAL EXPERIENCE.
Wait, do we know for sure this doctor is young and attractive? While reading this thread I always pictured a bumbling older doctor.
She mentioned earlier that he was about the same age as she was. Though the older doctor angle gives it a nice twist. I forced my husband to read all of this and he agrees this reads like a romance novel (though his terminology was "poorly scripted doctor's office porn").
Totally worded that wrong when I said something "we" could get past. I meant something I could get past- that being my nerves. Nothing else. And IF this is all in my head, which I've already admitted is a very real possibility, then I should get over it and there is no reason why in couldn't continue to see him because there is NOTHING there.
I never meant for this to turn into a humble brag or trolling for anything. I wasn't even going to bring up my suspicions of attraction, it was more like, well now that you mention it.....and it went down the rabbit trail from there. I've just tried to be honest about the whole situation and then I had my lightbulb moment where it became very apparent how ridiculous this whole thing was. It should have been clear from the beginning but I got confused and lost objectivity (which I already mentioned as well) OF COURSE I SHOULDN'T SEE HIM IF THERE IS ANY AWKWARD SEXUAL TENSION.
Just to satisfy everyone's curiosity and to clear it up, yes he is a younger doctor, no he is not hot in the traditional sense (but not ugly) the attraction is not reciprocated (but maybe appreciated- just an ego boost for a self conscious new mom) so I'm really NOT wanting the attention from him and seeking out cheap thrills.
Since I DO feel like there actually is something there and my husband agrees I have DECIDED TO CANCEL THE APPT. I was just really hoping for it to not be this way because it's hard for me to find a doctor I like and he was my favorite. I guess maybe I was trying to figure out a way around it -which is impossible. That is all.
WTF. As someone who is working on becoming a healthcare professional and sees naked people a lot, I would be so creeped out if I found out a patient was agonizing over me like this. I agree that bits are like elbows to me. If I found that a patient's heart was racing, I'd be charting it, not blushing. I do fumble a lot, but it has nothing to do with having the hots for anyone.
You make it sound like you see this person very regularly, which is weird. There's nothing to "get past" or any relationship that needs building. Calling MUD, but, anyway.
LFAF/Nov 16 challenge: Bad TV moms that shouldn't be celebrated
BFP #1 10/30/15 MMC found 11/30/15 D&C 12/11/15 EDD 7/9/16
healing comes in waves, and maybe today the wave hits the rocks and that’s ok, that’s ok, darling. you are still healing, you are still healing- Ijeoma Umebinyuo, be gentle with yourself BFP #2 3/21 EDD 11/28/16
I don't mean to come off as rude but...I agree there is nothing to get over. If I have an awkward experience at a OBGYN appointment the last thing I want to do is think about it (and by awkward I just mean I don't enjoy getting my vagina examined by a stranger) but I simply move on with my day and leave it in the past. And let's be honest, nobody likes to have a stranger up in their vagina but it's just something we do for health reasons. Nothing more. The "moving past it" thought process shouldn't even be a thought. I think it's clear as daylight now that you should switch doctors because weather he had a thing for you or not, you've played it up so much in your head that it's just a weird situation overall. It seems as if you almost want him to have a thing for you - that's just how it comes off to me because all your questions have been answered and this "awkward situation" is still a concern for you.
Either way, I hope you figure things out. If you showed your husband the things you wrote I'm pretty certain he would agree you should switch.
Just wanted to add that I've seen a thousand penises in my health care career, and never once did I look at them with any sexual/physical/emotional attraction. Ain't no thang. I've also fumbled with stethoscopes, not because I'm overcome with lust, just because I'm a human and get butter fingers now and then.
I'm a nurse and have taken care of attractive people and it has never made me think differently of them than anyone else. Usually much to busy to care tbh
Just wanted to add that I've seen a thousand penises in my health care career, and never once did I look at them with any sexual/physical/emotional attraction. Ain't no thang. I've also fumbled with stethoscopes, not because I'm overcome with lust, just because I'm a human and get butter fingers now and then.
I'm glad you put in "in my health care career". I was worried for a second.
It was only a concern because I had an upcoming appt. and I'm trying make the decision of selecting a primary doc for now on. This is not something I would typically dwell on. Since there was a big IF in the whole equation I was wrestling with it. The decision has already been made and it is now a non issue.
For the record, the fumbling and blushing that you are all trying to explain away is NOT the only indicator that I'm basing this off of. I already mentioned that I don't want to write a book about every little detail of why I have come to this conclusion. There is more.
Just to say my peace- I'm not saying that people who work in health care cant/don't treat all body parts equally. I'm saying if you have a thing for THE PERSON, not their parts, then all the sudden their parts are harder to treat as just that.
Gosh I feel so misunderstood....my fault for the way things haven wen presented over all but gah I'm over it. Discussion done.
For the record, the fumbling and blushing that you are all trying to explain away is NOT the only indicator that I'm basing this off of. I already mentioned that I don't want to write a book about every little detail of why I have come to this conclusion. There is more.
There's more?!?! Did his hand slowly brush your inner thigh before inserting the speculum in your vag?
Oh no..... Now you guys are turning this into some sort of doctor/ patient fantasy. I bet you're all dying to know what we both look like to see if there is any creedence to all this....
Oh no..... Now you guys are turning this into some sort of doctor/ patient fantasy. I bet you're all dying to know what we both look like to see if there is any creedence to all this....
Oh no..... Now you guys are turning this into some sort of doctor/ patient fantasy. I bet you're all dying to know what we both look like to see if there is any creedence to all this....
This right here makes me certain you just wanted some attention
Oh no..... Now you guys are turning this into some sort of doctor/ patient fantasy. I bet you're all dying to know what we both look like to see if there is any creedence to all this....
Oh no..... Now you guys are turning this into some sort of doctor/ patient fantasy. I bet you're all dying to know what we both look like to see if there is any creedence to all this....
This right here makes me certain you just wanted some attention
Seriously. What does it matter what you all look like? Attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder.
Oh my gosh. I'm just kidding garound. I'm not looking for attention. This has just gotten really funny. I'm totally not giving you guys pics. You guys were the one who posted all the McDreamy stuff and I'm calling out that if your in some nap jail and hooked on this thread you're looking for entertainment at this point and must be wondering....
Oh my gosh. I'm just kidding garound. I'm not looking for attention. This has just gotten really funny. I'm totally not giving you guys pics. You guys were the one who posted all the McDreamy stuff and I'm calling out that if your in some nap jail and hooked on this thread you're looking for entertainment at this point and must be wondering....
If you're not looking for attention, why the hell is this thing 3 pages long?
You need to just accept there is probably no way of turning this around to your favour. No idea what the real story is (though i can probably guess....) but you're not coming off well and your attempts to come off better are making you come off worse and worse.
My uncle, an arrogant ass who didn't know what was good for him, used to box and in the words of his very wise coach "For the love of god, Max, STAY DOWN".
I'm not trying to do anything. I think this is just as hilarious and ridiculous at this point. It started off as a genuine question and this is where we wound up.
Because I'm totally cracking up over here. Your gifs are amazing.
Honestly, If you guys are calling MUD for the sake of what I percieved from this guy, it wasn't intentional but maybe I'm stretching what I thought I saw (I'll never know) but it was enough for me to decided not to return to him.
If you think I made this WHOLE thing up, I PROMISE didn't. I swear. I got lost in my head, needed someone else to bounce it off of, I saw the light and now this is hilarious to me.
Re: Asking OB/GYN about their faith, etc
All of this has given me some much needed perspective for something I'm been trying to process over the past few days before my next appt at the end of the week.
This is thread is turning into the hot mess express.
I also don't ever think about whether a doctor may or may not be attracted to me... Why you ask? Because it is highly inappropriate and I don't believe in fostering such thoughts.
My advice is to move on and choose a different doctor with whom there is ZERO sexual tension on either party's part.
Totally worded that wrong when I said something "we" could get past. I meant something I could get past- that being my nerves. Nothing else. And IF this is all in my head, which I've already admitted is a very real possibility, then I should get over it and there is no
reason why in couldn't continue to see him because there is NOTHING there.
I never meant for this to turn into a humble brag or trolling for anything. I wasn't even going to bring up my suspicions of attraction, it was more like, well now that you mention it.....and it went down the rabbit trail from there. I've just tried to be honest about the whole situation and then I had my lightbulb moment where it became very apparent how ridiculous this whole thing was. It should have been clear from the beginning but I got confused and lost objectivity (which I already mentioned as well)
OF COURSE I SHOULDN'T SEE HIM IF THERE IS ANY AWKWARD SEXUAL TENSION.
Just to satisfy everyone's curiosity and to clear it up, yes he is a younger doctor, no he is not hot in the traditional sense (but not ugly) the attraction is not reciprocated (but maybe appreciated- just an ego boost for a self conscious new mom) so I'm really NOT wanting the attention from him and seeking out cheap thrills.
Since I DO feel like there actually is something there and my husband agrees I have DECIDED TO CANCEL THE APPT.
I was just really hoping for it to not be this way because it's hard for me to find a doctor I like and he was my favorite. I guess maybe I was trying to figure out a way around it -which is impossible. That is all.
WTF. As someone who is working on becoming a healthcare professional and sees naked people a lot, I would be so creeped out if I found out a patient was agonizing over me like this. I agree that bits are like elbows to me. If I found that a patient's heart was racing, I'd be charting it, not blushing. I do fumble a lot, but it has nothing to do with having the hots for anyone.
You make it sound like you see this person very regularly, which is weird. There's nothing to "get past" or any relationship that needs building. Calling MUD, but, anyway.
BFP #2 3/21 EDD 11/28/16
Either way, I hope you figure things out. If you showed your husband the things you wrote I'm pretty certain he would agree you should switch.
I feel like we're talking about an episode of Greys Anatomy.
For the record, the fumbling and blushing that you are all trying to explain away is NOT the only indicator that I'm basing this off of. I already mentioned that I don't want to write a book about every little detail of why I have come to this conclusion. There is more.
Just to say my peace- I'm not saying that people who work in health care cant/don't treat all body parts equally. I'm saying if you have a thing for THE PERSON, not their parts, then all the sudden their parts are harder to treat as just that.
Gosh I feel so misunderstood....my fault for the way things haven wen presented over all but gah I'm over it. Discussion done.
Now you guys are turning this into some sort of doctor/ patient fantasy.
I bet you're all dying to know what we both look like to see if there is any creedence to all this....
If you're not looking for attention, why the hell is this thing 3 pages long?
And yes, before someone else says it. It was already weird.
Honestly, If you guys are calling MUD for the sake of what I percieved from this guy, it wasn't intentional but maybe I'm stretching what I thought I saw (I'll never know) but it was enough for me to decided not to return to him.
If you think I made this WHOLE thing up, I PROMISE didn't. I swear. I got lost in my head, needed someone else to bounce it off of, I saw the light and now this is hilarious to me.
Okay I think I'm done.