We didn't circ, we have no regrets of not doing it. We have nothing to take care of, simply wipe what you can see and the pedi retracts it to check on whats going on. Never instructed to do anything else.
More and more people are deciding against it, so I'm not worried about my kid feeling like an outcast.
I told my husband to do heavy research and come back to me with his decision, and I did the same. Turns out we both agreed that it was a needless cosmetic procedure.
Your response made me laugh. One board I read - somewhere here on TB - had women talking about how their husbands are basically scarred for life because they were circumcised as a newborn. To me that just seems ridiculous. But nevertheless I had asked DH if he felt any resentment about it and he looked at me like I was crazy. @Glow360
Almost all of the children in the orphanage where I work are uncircumcised. There are a few who were as infants due to religious beliefs. We had one boy of about 4 year who had to have some surgery on his groin (I can't quite remember but I think his testicles hadn't dropped?) and the dr just went ahead and circumcised him and he was traumatized. He cried for like a week.
DH has been circumcised twice (can you say ouch?). The first as an infant and the second as his passage into manhood (14-16 yrs old) as a result of him being from the Maasai Tribe (google Maasai Male circumcision if you want to learn more). We've talked about it a bit but I think we will circumcise if we have a boy because I don't want him to be forced to be circumcised when he's 14-15 yrs old.
Aww thank you @DarthFuriosa . I'll admit sometimes I'm not totally sure what is appropriate or makes sense to share because I know I'm in a totally different lifespace than probably everyone here but being an American (and never ever having thought I would be married/having a baby in Africa) I still enjoy getting to share in on everyone's pregnancies.
Aww thank you @DarthFuriosa . I'll admit sometimes I'm not totally sure what is appropriate or makes sense to share because I know I'm in a totally different lifespace than probably everyone here but being an American (and never ever having thought I would be married/having a baby in Africa) I still enjoy getting to share in on everyone's pregnancies.
Please do keep sharing. Your experiences are as appropriate as anyone else's, and this is an international board, even though it is primarily US dominated. The international perspective is definitely welcome.
My husband and stepson are both circumcised. I considered not circumcising after hearing that it's not really more hygienic and that it's becoming less common. But I've had quite a few friends who had to do it later for medical reasons, and one was because her pediatrician had retracted it during an exam. I was alarmed that doctors seem so uneducated about it. I think I'd rather do it and get it over with than have to worry about it later.
DS is circumcised and so is DH. My biggest advice for those who are planning to do it - have a recommended pediatric urologist do it!! We did a lot of research into who was going to be the one cutting our son's penis and I'm glad we did!
Hubby wasn't, and in my culture we also don't circumcise. Therefore neither of my brothers were. I think if we were born with something then it should stay there. So I already know we will not circumcise our son, nor will we be removing his appendix unless medically necessary. I understand if it's done as part of a religious ceremony as some cultures believe and I respect those beliefs, but otherwise it's just so unnecessary and came about from incorrect presumptions about hygiene.
The only medical reason to circumcise is because it reduces the risk of STI, however using a condom reduces that risk much more
I now live in Europe and men here say they are glad they aren't circumcised because it reduces sexual pleasure. I actually know a guy who was not circumcised as an infant (preemie), but had to get circumcised in order to enter the US Special Forces. He confirmed that the circumcision reduced his sexual pleasure. It's only a sample size of 1, but worth considering.
We personally won't be circumcising but the risks of doing so are almost as tiny as the risks of not, so I really think it's a personal choice.
DS is circumcised and so is DH. My biggest advice for those who are planning to do it - have a recommended pediatric urologist do it!! We did a lot of research into who was going to be the one cutting our son's penis and I'm glad we did!
Having some rando doctor who happens to be on call perform a surgery on my newborn (IF circumcision is the route we choose to go) freaks me out. I think if this is the way we're going to then yours is a great recommendation. Thank you!
I would be lucky if my choice was only to circumcise or not. SO and I are a multi-cultural couple. I'm Catholic and he's Jewish. We have decided we are raising this baby multi-cultural as well (doing both Catholic ceremonies as well as Jewish)
If we had a boy, not only would this baby be circumcised, we'd have to have a Bris Ceremony----and that terrifies me! See this for more info: https://www.kveller.com/article/the-bris-ceremony/ Terrifying, right?
@annabenanna, my husband and I are the same as you, I'm Catholic, he's Jewish. For our first, he had a bris, which I basically stood nearby, but couldn't watch. The Moyel is a licensed pediatrician so that made me feel better. He did a great job. My son also had a Baptism. So he's being raised both and can choose which he believes when he gets older, those all of his faith formation is falling on me as his father is more cultural than practicing, even though we live in a highly jewish populated area. Find a good moyel, that will help alleviate some worries.
DH isn't circ'd and his penis is absolutely beautiful to me no issues with cleanliness either. I think the basic "wash yo nasty self" talk should suffice once LO is older and bathing himself. DS is not circ'd and we have not had a single problem.
@Bethweiss , thank you for this info. I thought the moyel was just a regular doctor, but not a pediatrician. That actually makes me feel much better. Is it true that they don't give the baby any painkillers for it? Just a drop of wine? Something like that?
I'm leaving the decision entirely up to my husband who's leaning toward cutting, as he himself is circumcised. My inclination is to do nothing until it's medically necessary, but as a medical professional I've seen the procedure and it wasn't that traumatizing. DH is the one that's going to have to have the nitty gritty puberty talks, if the kid someday becomes and angry Internet poster who laments his circumcision he can blame it on his father, but I also think some of those guys are a little unhinged and hopefully we'll raise our kid to love his body regardless.
I haven't formed an opinion yet but my H is very for it. I will say, my parents did not have my brother circumcised and he got made fun of so bad growing up that he opted to have the surgery when he was like 13ish. I'm not sure if his experience is going to influence our decision or not.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
My DS was circ'd too. Like a few PP's have said, he slept right through it, and gave zero indications that he was in any pain afterwards. It's such a personal decision. I did tons and tons of research after we found out he was boy and read tons and tons of stories on both sides. In the end, we circ'd and he's had zero issues with it.
We had our son circumcised, but I was not a fan of medical/surgical circs, so we had the procedure done by a Jewish mohel, even though we are not Jewish. We were both very pleased with the process, recovery and outcome. We will do the same again if this one is a boy. It took about 30 seconds and he was back to nursing.
As for saying what is and isn't normal, I think that is extremely dependent on where you live. Circumcision is definitely still the "normal" where I'm at.
We chose not to circumcise based on a strong belief that all individuals, including children, should have bodily autonomy. We don't force our kids to hug anyone, we're going to wait until they're old enough to ask for stuff like ear piercing (and 18 for tattoos, haha), and aren't going to tell them how they can dress or what they can or can't do to their bodies, etc. So it followed that we wouldn't do any elective surgeries without their consent. Our decision came up when our son needed surgery to remove a hernia blocking his testicles from descending, because the pediatric urologist has to surgically remove the adhesions in order to retract his foreskin and sterilize the surgical field, so after that happened we had to apply Vaseline and wiggle his foreskin during diaper changes for a long time to make sure it didn't readhere, but obviously those are special circumstances and we won't circ this next baby if it's a boy either. (I gotta say, I was kind of relieved that our last one was a girl because it means I didn't have to deal with any baby penis issues. So stressful for those of us who do not have them!)
We had to get my son's done at 4yo because it was not developing correctly. It was seriously horrible. If we have another boy we'll do it right away, but I totally understand why someone wouldn't want to do it because I didn't.
Re: Jumping the gun here...but can we talk about circumcision?
More and more people are deciding against it, so I'm not worried about my kid feeling like an outcast.
I told my husband to do heavy research and come back to me with his decision, and I did the same. Turns out we both agreed that it was a needless cosmetic procedure.
BFP: February 2016 EDD: October 17, 2016
@Glow360
DH has been circumcised twice (can you say ouch?). The first as an infant and the second as his passage into manhood (14-16 yrs old) as a result of him being from the Maasai Tribe (google Maasai Male circumcision if you want to learn more). We've talked about it a bit but I think we will circumcise if we have a boy because I don't want him to be forced to be circumcised when he's 14-15 yrs old.
I now live in Europe and men here say they are glad they aren't circumcised because it reduces sexual pleasure. I actually know a guy who was not circumcised as an infant (preemie), but had to get circumcised in order to enter the US Special Forces. He confirmed that the circumcision reduced his sexual pleasure. It's only a sample size of 1, but worth considering.
We personally won't be circumcising but the risks of doing so are almost as tiny as the risks of not, so I really think it's a personal choice.
DS#2 due 25 April 2019
If we had a boy, not only would this baby be circumcised, we'd have to have a Bris Ceremony----and that terrifies me! See this for more info: https://www.kveller.com/article/the-bris-ceremony/ Terrifying, right?
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
As for saying what is and isn't normal, I think that is extremely dependent on where you live. Circumcision is definitely still the "normal" where I'm at.