1st Trimester

DH and 1st Appointment

Hi Everyone,

Just made my first appointment with my OB-GYN for 8-10 weeks! Exciting but still so far away at the beginning of March! My question is did any of you/will any of you have DH come to the first appointment? I was unsure, since I do not know what to expect since this is our first, but DH already took the day off work and is excited to come. Just want to get a general feel of what everyone else did. TIA!
Married: June 2011
TTC #1: September 2015-January 2016
BFP #1: 1/25/16 - MMC Diagnosed 3/22/16
TTCAL: June 2016
BFP #2: 8/26/16 - EDD 5/9/17
Jackson born 5/6/17 at 8:36 PM - 9lbs 5oz & 21in
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Re: DH and 1st Appointment

  • My H came to the first appt. Partially because my first pregnancy was ectopic and I almost had a nervous breakdown going in for this one. It's fun, because they do an initial sono and you (should) be able to hear the heartbeat. Which is awesome! After that, it's blood pressure and peeing in cups, so H skips those.

    I hope you have a healthy pregnancy, but God forbid something is wrong, I found it really essential to have H there with me.
  • With our first H went with me since his job was pretty flexible. Our office did do an US although that's not the same everywhere. Otherwise it was pee in a cup, going over family history and basic info. With our second and third he didn't go and we knew more what to expect. Good luck!


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  • Mine didn't go for the first one because that one was just a pregnancy test. He went for the next one, though, when they did an ultrasound. Then, because there were some issues, the US had to be repeated 2 more times. So he didn't make it for the 2nd visit, but he did for the 3rd. Then, he went to the first appointment with the new OB and hasn't gone to any since unless it's an US.

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  • lilylover27lilylover27 member
    edited January 2016
    @sarahufland @bbiutmcphthanks for the input! I have heard mixed things as well as to what goes on during the first appointment. I didn't want t o bring H along if there wasn't going to be an ultrasound because otherwise he is waiting for me to pee in a cup and answer questions! Even if they do not do an ultrasound I agree it will be good to have H there just in case. I really hope they do an ultrasound though because H and I are waiting for the heartbeat to tell our parents and siblings. I can probably just call my doctors office and ask if they do one right?

    Edit: Also wanted to add I will about 9 weeks for my first visit.
    Married: June 2011
    TTC #1: September 2015-January 2016
    BFP #1: 1/25/16 - MMC Diagnosed 3/22/16
    TTCAL: June 2016
    BFP #2: 8/26/16 - EDD 5/9/17
    Jackson born 5/6/17 at 8:36 PM - 9lbs 5oz & 21in
      Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Mine came to the first and the second.  The first included an ultrasound which he was excited for.  The 2nd was just a check-in, but we did get to hear the heartbeat with the Doppler.  The plan going forward is for him to come to the anatomy scan appointment and then the ones at the very end so he's up to date with how things are looking at that point.  He may come to some of the check-in ones if his work schedule allows, but its not as high of a priority.  I do know he would come to any appointment I asked him to, which is ultimately what is most important to me to feel supported by him.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Me: 29 & Husband: 36                                                         
    Married: October 2014
    NTNP: April 2015 - June 2015
    M/C: June 2015
    TTC #1 since September 2015
    BFP: 11/9/15 - EDD: 7/24/16
  • @sarahufland @bbiutmcphthanks for the input! I have heard mixed things as well as to what goes on during the first appointment. I didn't want t o bring H along if there wasn't going to be an ultrasound because otherwise he is waiting for me to pee in a cup and answer questions! Even if they do not do an ultrasound I agree it will be good to have H there just in case. I really hope they do an ultrasound though because H and I are waiting for the heartbeat to tell our parents and siblings. I can probably just call my doctors office and ask if they do one right?
    Call the office to see what to expect. My H came to my 2nd appt with me and it took over an hour for literally 5 minutes of time with the doctor- it was a huge waste of his time. But he hates to miss the ones where we get to see the baby!
  • Call the office and ask.  That's the best way to know what to expect.  They may just do an overall physical and ask questions.  Or they may do an ultrasound.  You have no way of knowing.  Some DHs come to all appointments, some come to just the "big ones" and others rarely come.  There really isn't thing set thats "across the board"
  • Yes, my husband came to our first appointment since it was an ultrasound.  We hadn't expected to see/hear much but I ended up being 12 weeks instead of the 7-8 weeks I thought I was.
    He went to that appointment, and the 20 week scan, but I've not needed him for any of the 'regular' appointments.
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  • Thanks everyone! Just left a message for my doctors office to find out what to expect at the visit. Probably should of asked when I made the appointment in the first place!
    Married: June 2011
    TTC #1: September 2015-January 2016
    BFP #1: 1/25/16 - MMC Diagnosed 3/22/16
    TTCAL: June 2016
    BFP #2: 8/26/16 - EDD 5/9/17
    Jackson born 5/6/17 at 8:36 PM - 9lbs 5oz & 21in
      Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • My H came to the first OB appointment with me even though there wasn't an ultrasound because I wanted him to meet the doctor with me so that we could be sure it was the right fit. It was important to me that he like and trust our OB too.
  • Mine came. I called beforehand to ask what the first appointment involved so I found out that there was the US and we got to see and hear the HB. He loved it :)
  • My first ones are just blood draws to test my hCG levels. He will be coming to my first ultrasound though (doing an early one because of concern of an ectopic pregnancy). I am hoping that the early ultrasound will be in the near future. This wait is terrible, and I know having DH with me will be very important to me when we find out for sure if this LO is where they are supposed to be. 
  • DH usually comes to all my appts. Or at least takes me and hangs out with the kids while I'm being seen. I've always given him the option to stay home or whatever, but he likes going.
  • My DH is coming to all of my appointments. He likes to know what's going on with the baby and listen to the heartbeat, and he doesn't want to miss anything. I schedule all of my appointments late enough that he can get there after work.
    Me: 25  DH: 28

    Hubby's little boy - my wonderful step-son - born 5/23/10
    BFP#1: 06/2010...my beautiful baby girl born 3/7/2011
    BFP #2: 10/24/15...mc on 10/31/15
    BFP #3: 11/27/15. EDD 8/6/16

    "Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." -Winston Churchill
  • My DH also comes to all of my appointments. We go tomorrow for the medical history, and while that is a boring one, it might be handy to have him there when they ask medical questions about his side of the family. Next week will be my first appointment with the OB, and we'll have an US then. Even thought this is my 4th pregnancy, I'm nervous, because we had a miscarriage before our last son. I also was in denial about being pregnant for over a month before I took a test. I'm pretty sure I'm almost 12 weeks now!
  • DH has come to the first appointment with each baby. He also went to the anatomy scan with my first two, but couldn't make it for our third because of a class he couldn't miss. He doesn't come to any later appointments.


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  • For our first he came to every appointment (his choice, I don't think he wanted to miss out on anything). This time he came to the first one because we knew there would be an us and next one because we'll get to hear the heartbeat for the first time. Then he probably won't go until our anatomy scan and then maybe go to a couple when we are close if we can get a babysitter. 
  • It's great if he can come.  Besides just being exciting, they will have a lot of questions about family medical history in that first appointment so it's good for him to be there to answer about his own family.
  • DH made it to one appointment at 13w and another at 34w to meet my new doctor. Honestly, neither of us were too upset about him missing appointments. Once the major appts are out of the way they end up being a 10 min. "How are you feeling? Any concerns?" type of appointments. 
  • Dh came with me to the ultrasounds but not the doctor's appointments with my first, this time I'm going most of it alone. He will come for nt scan at 18/19 weeks because we are both really excited to find out what we are having :)
  • My h came to the first appt, and luckily because she ended up doing a u/s. He's been to every u/s and started going to all appts with me starting at 32 weeks due to complications. 
  • DH has only come with me for the U/S appointments. Having multiple losses in the past, there were quite a few at first, but I haven't had one since 20 weeks and probably won't have another since all is well. So I doubt DH will come to any of the rest of them either! If you're not getting a scan at your first appointment, it's likely you will just pee in a cup and maybe have blood drawn. You may not even see your doctor.

    Me: 29  DH: 31
    Married 10/13/12
    TTC Since 8/2016

  • DH came to first appointment ( but it included an us). He was excited to come and the doc said they usually come for the first one.
    Me:35, DH 37  ~ Married July 2014
    ttc July 2015 ~ bfp Nov 2015 (cp)
    bfp Dec 2015 ~ (tfmr 17wk, March 2016, genetic disease)
    ttcal May 2016
  • My husband only came to ultrasounds.   No need for him to be there for check ups.  
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