TTC After a Loss

TTCAL check-in 2/1

AL_TwinCitiesAL_TwinCities member
edited February 2016 in TTC After a Loss
Welcome to TTCAL! This check in is a great thread for you to jump in and introduce yourself.

1. Introduce yourself (if you're new)

2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.)

3. Rants/raves

4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do?
me 30; DH 35
TTC since May 2014.
Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. 
RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Short LP (8 days).
Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days 

Summer 2016 LFAF awards: 



Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:

«1

Re: TTCAL check-in 2/1

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  • 2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.) WTO here. On to cycle 4 post MC.

    3. Rants/raves: I had a super short luteal phase last cycle, 9 days, which really upset me. I am so frustrated at how long my body is taking to recover from this MC, a relatively early loss. I should have known, as I didn't get a cycle for over a year after having DS, but still... I'm annoyed.

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do?  We are super low key in regards to gifts, so not really. If anything we do cards. I've saved every card DH has ever given me for any reason and have a big box for our kids some day (the appropriate ones at least!). I knew quickly I was going to marry him and I wanted to chronicle this journey/story. 
  • 2. Status: WTO - CD7 - cycle 2 post MC

    3. Rant/rave: not related to TTC but our downstairs neighbour is raising a fuss with the condo board about us being too noisy and I fundamentally believe she is blowing things out of proportion and putting everything and the kitchen sink in her complaints. Even if the new floors we put in 5+ years ago aren't to bylaw standards, there is no way she should be hearing what she says she hears. Which means she is a) exaggerating and/or b) the building isn't up to code. DH has finally started to accept that we may need to move (the apartment is too small for a baby - well we have too much stuff for the apartment, the baby would fit if we got rid of some family antiques that I love) - but financially we can't afford our dream house so we'll have to move twice (he hates moving) - first to a house that has the space we need for little kids, and then to one where it has space for tweens/teens to hang out... 

    4. GTKY: Usually we forget to book reservations too late for our favourite restaurant - but this time we remembered! In the past we've avoided Valentine's day by 1-2 days and gone out for dinner - but the last few years DH has started to want to go out for the actual day. Because it takes planning it feels romantic. DH is ridiculously hard to buy for, so we don't tend to do a lot of gifts - even for anniversaries. 
    ---TW BFP and MC mentioned - scroll down past the Lilo and Stitch gif to avoid ---




    Me: 33 & DH: 33
    Married: 07/2006
    TTC: 10/2015
    BFP #1: 11/2015, MC 12/2015 (7 weeks)
    BFP #2: 06/2016, EDD 2/15/2017



    Pregnancy Ticker






  • 2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.):  TWW just started a few days ago.  Phew!  Now to try and stay calm... Although my first few temps in the luteal phase have been a bit lower than usual, so I'm not sure what is up with that yet.

    3. Rants/raves:  OK, so I want to know how all of you ladies cope with 'planning' while TTC.  I'm not sure how to explain it, so I'll just put my specifics out there:  I'm a competitive roller skater and roller skating is a fall risk during pregnancy, especially early pregnancy.  We're coming into the competition season and of course you have to sign up for competitions over a month in advance.  I don't want to give up skating while I know I'm not PG, but I also hate the thought of forking out all the money for events that I may not even get to attend.  I'm so focused on TTC right now I don't even know if I want to compete this season, but I also hate the thought of putting my 'life' on hold waiting for something that can take over a year to happen.  So, does anyone else have any experience in wrestling with this type of situation?  Any tips on juggling the "prepping for PG and doing what's best for that" versus the "not putting your life on hold"?  

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do?:  Neither DH and I are big on Valentine's Day, but we've found it's also somewhat miserable to skip it entirely.  So we usually do something low key like a nice dinner at home and watch a movie.  We usually exchange cards or a candy bar or some small token.  

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.

    FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)

    Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.

    FET #2: September 2024 (failed)

    FET #3: December 2024 (failed)

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • @AL_TwinCities It sounds like you have wonderful parents! And I really like what you and your H do with the random acts of kindness. 

    @BornReady Sorry about the short LP. I hope your cycle gets its act together soon.

    @catiecatp Ugh, awful neighbors suck. What in the world does she say she can hear?

    @dpjennifer Good luck in the TWW! As far as planning, is there any way you could only commit to competitions a month at a time? Otherwise, I'd probably decide how much money I was willing to lose if I did become pregnant, and just participate in less competitions.
  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    edited February 2016
    2. WTO. CD6. Just waiting for spotting to go away, and then we are officially off the bench! 

    3. Had my follow OB appointment last week, and everything went well. My thyroid is back down where it needs to be... Yay! We're testing me for MTHFR for my own peace of mind, but since my mother is homozygous, I'm switching PNVs anyway. My OB doesn't think it really plays a role in miscarriages though, but agrees more folic acid is warranted.

    4. When I was younger, I cared a lot more about Valentines Day, and made H do special dates. Now, we are a "cards if we remember" couple. 

    Edit: because the number 4 comes after the number 3.
  • @RiverSong15 - she claims she can hear us walking, the cats rumbling, our alarm clocks early in the morning, our loud TV.

    She is the type to let things fester instead of talking to us (we had no idea that she could hear anything for years - then she mentioned it once or twice - we changed behaviours a bit and thought we were better enough for her standards...) and she is also the type to call the police at 10:05 if a neighbour is having a patio party in the summer (so 5 minutes beyond when they're supposed to be quieter) and yes you can hear them if your windows are open... so close them.

    I'm sure she does hear some sounds more clearly than she should - for example my cell was on vibrate in the spare room on a desk and I couldn't hear my alarm going off in the living room. She came up to tell us - so clearly she heard it - but even if the floor isn't up to bylaw standards, there is no way she should hear it - so that suggests to us the building isn't up to code... She has also complained about my blender (an admittedly loud Vitamix) that I was using at 9pm (beyond the time her pre-teen needed to go to bed) and I was using it for maybe 10 minutes. 

    So we're on the search for some nice area rugs to show that we're acting in good faith - and telling the board all of the other actions we've already taken. 
    ---TW BFP and MC mentioned - scroll down past the Lilo and Stitch gif to avoid ---




    Me: 33 & DH: 33
    Married: 07/2006
    TTC: 10/2015
    BFP #1: 11/2015, MC 12/2015 (7 weeks)
    BFP #2: 06/2016, EDD 2/15/2017



    Pregnancy Ticker






  • @BornReady - I had a short LP this time too - FX your cycle smartens up for you

    @AL_twincities - that sounds like a lovely and loving care package

    @dpjennifer - not sure what to recommend here - are there other competitors who have had children who could tell you what they did while TTC? or a coach? 

    @RiverSong15 - yea for the thyroid cooperating - what are PNVs?
    ---TW BFP and MC mentioned - scroll down past the Lilo and Stitch gif to avoid ---




    Me: 33 & DH: 33
    Married: 07/2006
    TTC: 10/2015
    BFP #1: 11/2015, MC 12/2015 (7 weeks)
    BFP #2: 06/2016, EDD 2/15/2017



    Pregnancy Ticker






  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    edited February 2016
    @catiecatp That is so annoying. It sounds like your neighbor just isn't cut out for condo living. Even with a building up to code, dealing with neighbor noise comes with the territory of apartments and condos. Area rugs are a good step. Have you also looked at good carpet pads for underneath the rugs? The last time I lived on an upper floor, the carpet pads were what really dampened noise... The rug itself didn't do very much  :/

    ETA: PNVs = prenatal vitamins
  • @RiverSong15 - I had no idea about carpet pads - I'll ask about them when we're out shopping. 

    I agree that my neighbour is likely not suited to condo living - but I think she can only afford the mortgage on a condo, not a house... I hope karma bites her in the arse for me when we move - but I suppose that wishing that upon her isn't very good karma for me... I hope that the condo board recognizes our efforts and theoretically has be inundated by her complaints about multiple neighbours so that although they have to take some actions based on her complaints, they don't take her too seriously...
    ---TW BFP and MC mentioned - scroll down past the Lilo and Stitch gif to avoid ---




    Me: 33 & DH: 33
    Married: 07/2006
    TTC: 10/2015
    BFP #1: 11/2015, MC 12/2015 (7 weeks)
    BFP #2: 06/2016, EDD 2/15/2017



    Pregnancy Ticker






  • catiecatp wow, I can't believe she can hear those types of noises.  Glad you're looking into it.  I know moving sucks, but maybe moving twice may be your best bet.  And yeah, there are several people who have had kids while competing.  One of the ladies was still doing jumps and spins until she was about 5 months pregnant, when she switched over to dance and figures.  My dance/figure coach was competing in those events up until she had her baby, including giving a lesson on her skates (not doing anything extreme, but still on the skates) the morning she had her C-section.  But after my MC I just don't know that I'd want to risk it. :(

    RiverSong15 I can commit to competitions on a monthly basis.  I guess it's the whole idea that I need to know about the first one probably by the end of this week, and in order to compete at all this year I need to fill out my registration forms and pay my registration fee, which is a bigger expense.  

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.

    FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)

    Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.

    FET #2: September 2024 (failed)

    FET #3: December 2024 (failed)

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • @catiecatp Ugh your neighbor sounds like my old roommate who moved into my condo with me before DH and I were serious. She would come out of her room everyday and start yelling about how noisy our upstairs neighbors were. Um they were just walking around living their lives. Unfortunately that is just condo/apartment living- most vintage buildings just aren't and can't be noise-proofed. 

    2.) Cd 29, DPO 12- BFNs all weekend and I just started some intense cramping. No AF yet. I'm freaking out that this cycle will be like last cycle, intense cramping and pain while AF is stuck because of scar tissue/endo or who knows what. Has anyone else dealt with this?
    3.) Rant/Raves- I did not expect to be so devastated about the BFNs this weekend. I've literally been crying my eyes out at the beach this weekend. The intense cramps set me off this morning. I'm deathly afraid that there's scarring from my D&C, but my doctor was adament it was just a little piece of scar tissue and nothing to worry about. I see her next week and I'm going to push her harder on this. At what point do you go to an RE? My doctor has made it clear that I need to wait 5 more months before they will start investigating why I'm not getting pregnant. But I am telling you that something is wrong with my body. I have super intense o-pain at cd15 and cd 20-which was new. Last night I felt like someone was stabbing my uterus with a pen. It was just for 2 minutes, but scared the crap out of me. I feel a results-oriented RE will take me more seriously.

    Im also not sure what to do about my husband. I feel so bad about waking up bawling constantly. He doesn't know how to make feel better and it drives him crazy.

    GTKY- H and I always try a new fancy-ish restaurant on Valentines Day. I usually bake him something yummy and he buys me flowers.
  • 2. WTO CD9.

    3. I took a bump break for a little while and now I'm back. I think I am heading into my FW. 

    4. We don't really ever plan anything. If we both have off then maybe we will go to dinner. I am going to be taking 6 month pictures of my BFFs kid that day.
    _______________________________________________
    TTC#1 July 2015 
    • BFP: 9/16/15 — MC: 11/8/15 Blighted Ovum
    • BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
    TTC#2 April 2019 
    • BFP: 9/12/19 — EDD 5/15/20

  • 2) CD5 of cycle #2 after loss 2.   Finished the last 150mg clomid dose last night, down to 100mg for the next two nights then I wait until CD12 appointment next Monday.   I have a feeling this cycle is going to feel painfully long.   Dying to know if the RE is going to want to do trigger and IUI or just TI again. 

    3) I feel so unmotivated to do ANYTHING today.  

    4) V-Day is DH's birthday.   We don't like to go out because it's always crowded with the V-Day peeps so I'll make something nice for dinner and we'll relax at home.   We also need to institute another day of the year as our V-Day.  I've officially decided this.    I also had my first loss on V-Day last year, so I'm sure that will likely be on our minds a bit too. 

    ****TW****

    Me: 39 DH: 40
    Married: 12/6/2014

    BFP#1: 1/20/15      MC: 2/14/15
    BFP#2: 10/28/15    MC: 11/24/15
    BFP#3:  3/20/16     MC: 4/26/16
    BFP#4:  7/15/16     DD: 3/18/17
    BFP#5:  5/1/18     EDD: 1/12/19
    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker


  • . Introduce yourself (if you're new)

    Hi, I am new here, hello. I have been lurking a bit, now about 1 month post miscarriage I thought I would jump in. DH and I have one son who is 17 months. We just had a MMC at 7.5 weeks. We saw a heartbeat at 6 weeks and then at our measuring scan the heart beat was very slow, by the end of the day it had stopped. I took the miso pill and physically that went very smoothly. Emotionally it has been hard as we just moved to a new town and I don't really have some of my support network or even doctors I know yet.

    2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.)
    Benched waiting for my first cycle and to get back from the carribean in mid February 
    3. Rants/raves

    my cousin just announced she is due two weeks before my EDD was. Very happy for her, but I was not expecting it to be that hard for me to hear. 

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do

    we are going on a cruise this year that we just booked post miscarriage but before all the zika news came out. I was supposed to go on one 2 days after we found out about the miscarriage, but we were able to reschedule. Excited about the trip and the fact we don't have to plan anything else special on Valentine's Day this year


    BabyFruit Ticker
  • 2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.) Benched/WTO. I'm charting so I hopefully have an idea of what timing to expect next cycle when we are unbenched. So far O has already been delayed at least 3 days past my normal cycles.

    3. Rants/raves... sick of hearing about other people who are pregnant and not happy about it. Nothing I can do about it, but seriously.... :angry: 

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do? We usually just make it a low key night at home, we swap cards and he usually gets me flowers and I buy our favorite truffles to share. Then we do a nice dinner out either the weekend before or after.
    Rainbow baby Dean is due 2/17/17!
  • @chloe97 I think it's perfectly reasonable to be concerned, and if you have the same issues again this month I might get a second opinion. Having a doctor take your worries more seriously might make you feel better.
    Rainbow baby Dean is due 2/17/17!
  • @chloe97 - Sorry you are having so much pain and the doctor isn't taking you seriously. I hope you get answers soon (or better yet.. a BFP)

    @morgan400 - So sorry you have found yourself here, and sorry you have to deal with your cousin having a close EDD. I fortunately haven't run into anyone with an EDD near mine, but I can imagine that it would feel like a stab in the heart. *hugs*

    @winchestergirl - I know what you mean about ppl who don't want to be KU. My friend is on her second unplanned pregnancy. Last month she was all upset about the child's gender. Then recently she posted on FB that she would gladly trade her kid for a cheeseburger from In and Out burger (we don't have those anywhere near here). It was a joke, but I was SO annoyed.

    @dpjennifer - I definitely know what you mean! I'm a runner, and I have given up training for any big races for the same reason (I know you can run while KU, but I'm clumsy so I don't trust myself). I've pretty much cut out running all together, but I've decided that if I don't get a BFP this week then I'll go back to just casually running on my own but no big races (unless I just randomly decide to do a 5k last minute while WTO). I'm also frustrated about the decision of whether or not to plan travel. DH and I love to travel, but I don't quite feel comfortable planning anything with TTC future unclear. We are semi-planning a trip in June, but we are making it KU friendly and doing it in a way that everything can be purchased last minute. My tip is to not give up on the things you love, but find a way to do them in a way that doesn't involve firm commitments. Maybe skate on your own, but don't do any competitions?

    2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.) TWW at 8 DPO/CD 29.

    3. Rants/raves: I'm going crazy with the symptom spotting. Had a major temp drop this morning, so I can't wait to see if it comes back up tomorrow. If it does, I'll probably start testing all the time. Heck, even if it doesn't, I'll probably also start testing everyday until AF. I'm so dang anxious, thinking about the fact that this week either means AF or a BFP. It is my first cycle TTC since loss, so I'm nervous about how I will handle it emotionally (either way).

    Also, I have my first acupuncture appointment on Thursday, and I can't wait!

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do?  We don't ever give each other gifts. We do usually go out to eat at our favorite sushi restaurant and stuff our faces beyond capacity. I'm hoping I'll have to skip the sushi this year. ;)

  • 2. WTO. Started temping this cycle! (2nd cycle post-loss) CD 8. 

    3. Rants/raves: I'm interested to see what temping reveals for me. I feel very hormonally imbalanced still post-D&C. My migraines that usually show up during AF are showing up at other random times, PMS symptoms have been all different....I suspect last cycle was anovulatory but I have no way to know for sure. I just feel out of sorts. As for the rave side of things, I'm shopping today at the outlet mall with my best friend and we are having a blast so far (she's BFing and currently pumping so I'm bumping). 

    4. We do sometimes but nothing too grand. We usually cook a fancy dinner at home and exchange a small gift or cards and watch a movie together. We try to avoid the chaos of going out. 
  • @AL_TwinCities what a lovely surprise-- I hope you give yourself some time to really enjoy those things :)
  • @dpjennifer
    I know what you mean by not wanting to put your life on hold for ifs. I have been TTC for over two years now and put a lot stuff on hold because it was going to happen, any cycle now! After a year I realized that I can plan for whatever I want but life with do what it's going to do. I'm struggling to live in the moment, and not planning on it anymore helps. Good luck with whatever you decide :)

    2. WTO, CD 2.

    3. So tired of being too stressed to get pregnant, just stresses me out even more. I'm literally stressing about stressing! Doing stress relieving activities and all I can think is if I am relieving stress right. Ugh.

    4. We don't always celebrate holidays really. We're both cheap-asses so we hate spending money a lot. However we are going to spend a bit of a weekend away not really for V-day, but a nice little treat for us <3<3


    I'm new to gifs, but I have a huge arsenal of memes!
    Wish I could make human babies like I make plant babies!

    There's a gazillion of them!!
    Married to  for 3yrs w/5 furbabies :*
    TTC for 2 yrs.
    One loss at 9 wks, May 2014
    Two chemicals before TTC
    Preparing for infertility testing



  • @WinchesterGirl

    I hear you about people and unwanted pregnancies. That and when I see people ignoring their children (I teach preschool) who so desperately want their parents attention. It makes me furious!! They don't know how lucky they are! 
  • @dpjennifer you sound like me and my DH-- we both hating spending money too, and can't stand the outrageous dinner prices for Valentine's day weekend! I hope you have a wonderful, stress-free weekend!


  • 2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.)  Started my first period since MC, which means I'm officially back to TTC.

    3. Rants/raves  I thought being off the bench would make me feel excited, but I'm feeling kind of down about the whole thing instead.  I feel like, I already did this!  Why do I have to do it again?

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do?  Not really.  I'm an elementary teacher and kinda get wrapped up in the kids' stuff.  I tend to forget that it's a holiday for adults as well.
    TTC #1 since June 2015
    BFP #1 Nov 2015 ended in MC Dec 26 2015
    BFP #2 Feb 2016, EDD Nov 8 2016




  • dpjennifer   I have no advice, but I 100 percent relate with what you're saying.  My crazy brain will even go as far as saying if I change anything assuming I'll be pregnant, then I'm jinxing myself.  TTC is crazy.

    @DinosaurJumper  Your rave made me LOL because you sound like me.
    TTC #1 since June 2015
    BFP #1 Nov 2015 ended in MC Dec 26 2015
    BFP #2 Feb 2016, EDD Nov 8 2016




  • @dpjennifer I can kind of relate to your situation. I am a dancer and since TTC there's always been a show or recital looming in the near future and I have worried about paying for a costume that may not get used, having to drop out and confusing the staging for others, stressing my body with rehearsals and performances, blah blah blah. But like @BooksForMe23 I feel that if I cancel on anything I'll jinx myself and be sitting in the audience at the recital, crying, watching my friends up there and thinking "silly me thought I would be pregnant now". It sucks so much. I guess it's just about finding a balance you are comfortable with, physically and financially. I have cut back the number of classes I take so that's good for my body and wallet, and if I'm not pregnant at recital time, well I'm still involved. It's been working okay so far.

    @strickland8052 I hear you on the travel planning. Really wanting to plan a big trip for the fall or Christmas time. Would definitely boost my mood and give me something super exciting to look forward to!! Booked trip = Mood boost = more (enjoyable) BDing = BFP?= cancelled trip. :neutral: Thanks TTC for making everything make so much sense! Bah.

    1. I'll do a quick intro since I missed checking in last Monday. Married in 2012. Started TTC#1 July 2014. 1st m/c just shy of 7weeks in April 2015. 2nd m/c at 5.5 weeks in November 2015. DH and I have been together now for almost 13 years. Our dog is our four legged child and I can tell she's annoyed with how much we obsess over her. It's high time we add to our little family!!!!

    2. Status: WTO. CD2. I had high hopes last cycle, and kind of stayed away from here during TWW because I was feeling quite anxious. Managed to avoid peeing on a stick because AF showed on the last day I would be "expecting" her. At least she showed on time - thanks for something, body.

    3. One of my besties has a 8 month old, and I do love him dearly. They live about 3 hours away and I don't see them a whole lot. The space has been nice actually. But she constantly is sending me pics and videos and it's starting to get to me. I get it - he is your life and he's darn cute and you want to share him with your loved ones. I do appreciate the occasional update and we do see each other enough that I feel like I am not missing out. But I feel like she doesn't "get it" and I don't know how to tell her it's making me upset. The sad part is that she thinks she's helping to cheer me up. I think that's why the pics and videos get to me.
    And my ongoing rant these days is my younger brother and wife getting pregnant 1st month married. They are 6 months along now. Just living in the shadow of that gives me something new to rant about every day.

    4. We usually celebrate with food, either at home or out. We might treat ourselves out to a really nice dinner because of all the years, we feel like this would be the one where we deserve it. Also if my cycle stays on track I'll be ovulating just after V-day. Scheduled sex never looked so sexy! :tongue: 

    H and I both 30
    TTC #1 started Aug 2014
    BFP Apr 3 2015
    natural M/C April 20 2015 @ 6w6d
    BFP Nov 18 2015
    natural M/C Nov 23 2015 @ 5w4d.

  • I hear you on the activities and not being sure if you should do them. I do herding with my dog, and lambing season is coming up, and with it a pretty good chance of getting listeria from the sheep. I'll have to bow out for a couple months if I get pregnant before late March or so. But we'll cross that bridge when it comes. Do your competitions give refunds if you have a medical reason? 

    1. Introduce yourself (if you're new) Had a missed miscarriage, trying ever since, just started third cycle

    2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.) WTO, CD3. Bleeding to death, apparently. 

    3. Rants/raves. Honestly, I'm feeling pretty depressed. I have a therapy appointment coming up but I don't think it will even do a lot of good, because if I were totally honest I'd probably get committed or something. I'll be okay. It just sucks. Also feel stuck because I want to pursue some testing but I've "only" had one loss and I'm not sure how to go about it. I'm just terrified that it is a progesterone issue or MTHFR and it will just happen again when it could have been a simple fix. 

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do. I like any excuse to do something special. On Valentine's day itself, I usually make steak or something, and we go out on some other day to beat the crowds. We don't really do gifts, especially since my birthday is a month later anyway. 
    LFAF/Nov 16 challenge: Bad TV moms that shouldn't be celebrated


    BFP #1 10/30/15 MMC found 11/30/15 D&C 12/11/15 EDD 7/9/16
    healing comes in waves, and maybe today the wave hits the rocks and that’s ok, that’s ok, darling. you are still healing, you are still healing- Ijeoma Umebinyuo, be gentle with yourself
    BFP #2  3/21   EDD 11/28/16
  • @fiancb Oh my gosh, I feel like I should be committed too. Just when you think you're doing okay, a weekend of BFNs will mess with your head. I'm just devastated and I spent all of this time thinking that I would just be okay if I made it to this weekend and the know here I am. What now? I also agree about the testing. I have my annual next week and I'm going to push my doctor to do testing. I'm not waiting 5 more months to then just get started with testing. At that rate, I would be 38 at the earliest with my first child. Thinking about a 2nd devastates me. If My doctor refuses the hystercopy that I think I need bc of scarring then I'm going to the RE. I'm making the appt tomorrow. As long as the issues are caused by my MC, my insurance should cover it before the 6 month mark. Thinking about all of this is messing with my head. I don't know how to turn it off, especially when I'm cramping up a storm and so it's constantly on my mind. 
  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    edited February 2016
    @FiancB  FWIW, my OB didn't seem too overly concerned about MTHFR. She said it definitely interferes with folate processing, and that taking additional, bio available folate couldn't hurt, so I'm switching my PNVs. But she said that as far as causing miscarriages or clotting issues, she says the medical research over the last five years hasn't really borne out the connection. I also couldn't find much recent research in the scientific literature to support much beyond the "maybe there's a connection" conclusion. So, If you're worried about that, you can switch your PNV, but otherwise, I'd try not to worry about MTHFR (easier said than done, I know). Hugs. I hope you feel better soon.

    ETA: @chloe97, if you do push for testing, keep in mind that it likely won't be covered by insurance without a history of 3 losses (super sucky). Also, RPL testing could also turn out with everything coming back normal. My OB said that happens about half of the time (Can you tell I also asked about testing at my last appointment?) 
  • @FiancB & @chloe97 , I am right there with you ladies! I was crying to DH the other day about all of the "wrong" decisions that have led me to my current situation...waiting too long to ttc, going to graduate school, selling our house etc. I had inexplicably tied all of these random events and determined that I missed my opportunity to have more children and have ruined the lives of us all. I am also terrible about doing the mental arithmetic of "I'll be this old when", "My kids will be this old and I will be this old" etc. It puts me into a very bad place and four years ago when I began this journey I never would have guessed this is where I'd be. 

    Fortunately these moments come in waves and I'm feeling much better a few days out... but seriously the sadness is real. 
  • @chloe97 I really hope everything is okay with you and that when you finally do get to see a RE he/she can help you both physically and mentally. 

    @AL_TwinCities That was so nice of your parents! They sound like wonderful people. I hope you have been doing well lately. 

    @strickland8052 I'm in the same boat! Good luck and FX for a BFP this month! i'm sure I will be testing every day too! Also, I love acupuncture, I hope you enjoy it too!

    2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.): TWW 9pdo. I'm getting excited, but also trying not to get my hopes up either. 

    3. Rants/raves: I had a rough weekend. My little sister just told me that she is pregnant with her 2nd. I'm happy for her, but that now means that my little sister and my DH's little brother will now both have 2 children before we have our first. So I was feeling a little sorry for myself this weekend and it is making me want to test like a mad woman. But I'm still thankful for all of the wonderful things I DO HAVE in life. 

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do? DH and I don't usually do anything too special, we just spend the evening together. Although, last year he brought me flowers and churros (he knows the way to my heart is through my stomach)! 
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • @RiverSong15 Thanks for the heads up, that is definitely true about testing for my MC, but I'm actually having pretty intense pelvic pain associated with what I think is my period without bleeding again. Because it's painful and could be scarring from my D&C, it would probably put it in the medically necessary category. But I completely agree that it's stupid that you have to wait if it's considered a fertility issue.


  • @RiverSong15 - will insurance still not cover people like @chloe97 who are over 35 for fertility testing? I understand their unwillingness to not test losses until the 3rd mc for younger patients. 

    2. Status: WTO CD14 on Cycle 2 post-MMC. I'm thinking I have a 30 day cycle, so 2 more days WTO. Kind of unsure since I haven't let my body establish a recurrent routine since BCP.

    3. Rants/raves: none today. Apparently my swim hour which has just been me and a lifeguard is about to turn into aqua zumba hour. Not sure how I feel about that. It could be awesome, but I do enjoy just swimming my laps.

    4. GTKY: do you and your SO celebrate Valentine's Day? If so, what do you usually do? When DH and I started dating, Valentines was our 6-monthiversary, and we went on our first weekend getaway to celebrate. He's enjoyed making it a tradition that we always do a weekend away. This year, we're driving over to Charlotte, NC. We're slackers when planning and so far, we've booked an AirBNB, and nothing else. 

    Married 10/12 & TTC since 09/15
    BFP #1 11/06/15 - EDD 7/14/16 - MMC 12/14/15 - D&C 12/22/15
    BFP #2 03/13/16 - EDD 11/26/16

  • @monkey41-Probably not which is ridiculous because it could take years to finally get diagnosed with RPL. I've read that ASRM guidelines are starting to recommend testing after 2 MCs over 35, but I'm not sure if insurance has caught up. My policy doesn't address RPL in my coverage information, it just specifies that I need to be TTC for 6 months before I can get IUI and/or IVF. 
  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    edited February 2016
    @monkey41 the criteria for RPL testing is the same, but people over 35 can seek fertility testing after 6 months regardless, and any RE would probably take MC history into account when ordering tests anyway. But one MC and being over 35 doesn't let you "skip ahead" so to speak. This is all assuming, of course, that your insurance will pay for infertility testing. My insurance pays for bupkiss when it comes to anything infertility related.

    ETA: @chloe97, what does your coverage say about testing? Any testing your RE orders once you hit the six month mark would probably include RPL tests, given your history. It may be covered at that point, without a third loss.
  • @AL_TwinCities   what an awesome idea for your parents to send that!

    @catiecatp    your neighbor sounds atrocious! I'm so sorry you have to deal with that.

    @monkey41  I've never heard of aqua zumba but it sounds like it could be pretty awesome!
    *American in Tanzania, East Africa, since 2013
    DH - Tanzanian
  • kmolleltz said:
    ****TW/BFP****
    3. I am scared to death now that I know I am pregnant again. Like terrified that every time I go to the bathroom there is going to be blood. I hope and pray it gets easier, knowing this is only day 1, I'm just trying to breathe.
    Congratulations! Today you are pregnant! I found meditation and positive affirmations to be really helpful in early pregnancy after loss. There are even some guided meditations for pregnancy that are on YouTube that really helped me relax and feel connected to the pregnancy. For a little while at least, I felt more happy than nervous and scared. Hugs!

    @goldentmama I'm so sorry about your sister. It's painful to watch those close to us add to their families before we do, especially when we think about the ones that we lost. I know exactly how you feel. It's okay to feel the way you feel.
    me 30; DH 35
    TTC since May 2014.
    Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
    Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
    AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. 
    RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
    Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Short LP (8 days).
    Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days 

    Summer 2016 LFAF awards: 



    Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:

  • @al_twincities thank you so much  for that encouragement. 
    *American in Tanzania, East Africa, since 2013
    DH - Tanzanian
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