We're having a Girl! I'm happy, but...

LifeofLauren2 · January 2016

We found out today we are having a little girl! The rest of our results from our testing look great. Low risk for the 4 chromosomal disorders they test for. We are both really excited. I am just a little bit upset though. Our previous loss was a little boy and it sounds crazy but I had my heart set on a little boy this time too. We don't have any children yet and we plan to try for more kids. It's a weird hurting in my chest that I can't explain. Don't get me wrong, I can't wait to buy super cute dresses and little bows and whatnot, but this news also makes our previous loss very real and fresh for me. Anyone else experience this? I can't be the only one!

rkrichey · January 2016

I never knew the gender of any of my three losses. That would have made them even harder I think. So while I don't have any exact experience with your situation I did hear a mom on here say something that stuck with me. The second baby was the opposite gender of the first she lost. She said it was kind of a good thing for her bc she could give this baby it's own identity and not be like replacing the one she lost. I don't know if that's helpful for you or not. Not that that's even what you're trying to do. I think you're completely entitled to feel whatever feelings are coming your way. I'm guessing after a few days or weeks of it sinking in, you'll feel a little better. ((Hugs)) to you bc none of this is easy.

LifeofLauren2 · January 2016

Thank you @rkrichey! That's exactly what I needed to hear tonight!

mommaseal · January 2016

First, I'm so sorry about your son. I had very similar feelings. I have a 4yo son and the baby we lost was a girl. Going into this pregnancy I had a real hard time deciding if I wanted to find out now or at the birth. I didn't want to feel disappointment if I wasn't going to get a little girl. I didn't want to feel disappointment at all because I was so thankful to have this pregnancy. It's such a strange feeling and I understand. We ended up finding out and it was a little girl. So God willing, I will get my baby girl. Congratulations on your little girl! I pray you will have the love of a little boy in your next pregnancy.

bntfroggie · January 2016

I am thoroughly convinced the baby we lost was a little boy, we have no proof and I lost it at 12wks so no way to know. Anyway I am now pregnant with a little girl and I honestly panicked when we found out, but not for the same reasons as you. I feel like I barely pass as a girl since I was such a tomboy, I can't do my hair or make up and I can barely dress myself, never the less have any style at all, I just feel like my husband is an awesome guy and would be able to teach a son how to be awesome and I'm at a loss with a little girl, but I will figure it out.

LifeofLauren2 · January 2016

@bntfroggie just because you're not a girly girl doesn't mean you won't know what to do with a little girl. She may also be a tomboy. And, if she isn't then you will learn to play dress up and have pink frilly things. I'm not planning on a lot of pink or bows. But, if my daughter is showing me that this is what she wants to do then I'll surely buy them for her. I think you just have to pay attention to your daughter and go with what she is showing you.

My niece is 3 and all she wants to do is go to dance class, play with her toy kitchen, and take a tumbling class (no one has ever talked to her about this). But, her dad is trying to force her into soccer. The little girl doesn't want to kick around a ball. All she wants to do is put on her tutu but it's not because anyone has ever told her "this is what little girls are supposed to do." It's just her. If she were more interested in playing with balls or trucks then I think soccer would be good. Like I said, you just have to listen to your kid and follow their lead.

You'll do great! Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.

carrieandr · January 2016

My twin nephews wanted to wear nail polish and carry purses when they were three. They were also obsessed with garbage trucks and construction equipment. They were all over the place. Like PP said, just follow her lead.

kimey1 · January 2016

@bntfroggie We are all best at being who we are. How boring would it be if we were all the same? I'm sure your lil girl will appreciate who you are!

bntfroggie · January 2016

@LifeofLauren2 thank you for that, I think that is the conclusion I came to as well.
@CarrieandRoy I'm so excited to see her little personality

@kimey1 awe thank you, very true we would be so boring.

kwrightnb · February 2016

I'm so sorry about your little boy and can definitely relate to your situation. My first was a little girl, we named her Lillian. When we found out we were having a boy this time I had a lot of weird mixed emotions about it..
Now im 26 weeks and am glad the sex is different. My vision of my daughter is its own separate memory now, and I think if I were to be having another girl it would stir up all those feelings I had towards my little girl. Now I can plan for a COMPLETELY different child, sex and all. And I can start off my hopes and dreams with a fresh start. I know the pain of loosing a little one and I hope you start to feel better soon

Boonhilde · February 2016

I think I can understand. You got your mind prepared for a girl. I only have boys. I think if I lost a girl and didn't have another one of feel the loss just a bit more, and a bit more of a sting at the US. But congrats on a healthy US! Hopefully this boy will someday soon have a little sister.

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