Not enough stuff on my registry?

mamaroar · January 2016

My shower invites have been out for less than a week and I'm already getting a lot of feedback from the shower host (my SIL) that there's not enough stuff on my registry and people are asking what to buy for me.

I didn't go overboard with with registering because at 38, I feel a little "weird" about a party where the theme is people buying me stuff. I asked that everyone invited bring me a book - either a book they loved as a child, or a book they loved reading to their child, and sign the book so that when I get it out an an age appropriate time, I will know who it came from. I would honestly be happy if all anyone showed up with was a book!

I also did not register for any baby clothes - I figure people can go pick out the stuff they like, right?

I am going to Target tonight to try and add more things to my list, but if I am not successful in adding a whole bunch more stuff, would it be inappropriate of me to start telling people that if they are uncomfortable going "off registry" to buy me something, and uncomfortable with a gift card, that they can donate diapers to our local women's crisis center in my name?

FWIW, the ONLY shower gift I ever give other moms is a Target gift card, and I don't find it a "cop out" or impersonal at all. Every mom I have known has had a "need to run to Target in a rush" for something moment - why not make sure they have a nice gift card for when that moment comes?

flowerpower5838 · January 2016

Maybe add a bunch of diapers? I've read that target is pretty good about exchanging unopened boxes so it really shouldn't matter how many you get in a particular size.

soxfan9968 · January 2016

I just chose a few outfits so people knew my preference in colors and style but not many. Similar concept, people are going to buy what they like anyway.

eivaska · January 2016

What about some stuff for when baby is older? High chair and feeding stuff? That way you can stretch the gifts out?

bntfroggie · January 2016

Gift cards.

LoA · January 2016

I would add to the registry any smaller items also, that you would think you need to buy now or future for you or the baby. At the very least you can get a discount coupon for remaining items not bought.
Some things I tend to register for, simply because I'd rather people buy me the "brands" I trust/like: lotion, soaps, shampoos, diapers, wipes, rash creams, feeding items, any medicinal items during first year(for both me and baby). This is stuff I am, and could easily buy for myself, but I have found it more convenient if people have the option to choose items they know I prefer

cmerribury · January 2016

Try to add what you can. Do you have anyone (a sister or cousin or friend) who recently had a child and can go with you? A lot of times it seems like overkill, but often it's not. Several sets of sheets and mattress pads, for instance would be a lifesaver. (Just as an example.)

Of course, in my experience, people will always find something nice to get you, so I wouldn't lose too much sleep over it.

bagel37 · January 2016

I have a lot of items on my registry, but most of them are under $10. I registered for everything from rash cream, baby powder and lotion to baby shampoo, soap and baby wipes. Just add all the little stuff to fill it up!

ClaireBear90 · January 2016

mamaroar said:

I am going to Target tonight to try and add more things to my list, but if I am not successful in adding a whole bunch more stuff, would it be inappropriate of me to start telling people that if they are uncomfortable going "off registry" to buy me something, and uncomfortable with a gift card, that they can donate diapers to our local women's crisis center in my name?

I know I always enjoy picking out a gift for someone's shower, but I also understand not wanting tons of unnecessary stuff. You will go through a lot of diapers (unless you're cloth diapering), but you can always donate the diapers that you do receive if you prefer. It's a nice thought.

mamaroar · January 2016

These are great suggestions! I went to Target last night and used the scanning gun to add about 30 more things to my registry - I feel like everything is either $10 or over $100. I also registered for 4 boxes of my preferred diapers in each of the 4 sizes.

And I guess if I get some extra stuff I can always take it back.

Parker16772 · January 2016

You can also edit/add things online if you need to. I would def register for some bigger items. People can always go in together if they want or get you a gift card to go towards your bigger items. My go to shower gift is also gift cards because I don't have time to shop, target, buybuy baby and babies are us are 40 minutes away from me and I figure they can use it to get diapers or put towards bigger items they didn't get at their shower or need.

skruhmin · January 2016

Make sure you have gift cards on the registry. And yes to diapers. You can never have too many diapers.

tJaffe · January 2016

I registered for the essentials for the 1st year. Big things included. I went through BRU because of the discount and e-gift card they send, but also because I'm using bum genius diapers and they have those.... But anyway, I can use the discount code for those bigger items that aren't purchased. The teachers at my school always do a baby shower too so I put a lot of items $30 and under as well. Such as, spoons, sheets, cloth diapers, etc... But based on my family thrown baby shower, no one even looked at the registry except for 3 ppl. I got a ton of things that I didn't actually need.

flowerpower5838 · January 2016

I did not even realize you could register for gift cards. That's genius. Off to edit my registry...

mshukh · January 2016

@tjaffe that really sucks after going through the effort of putting one together.

JessKo08 · January 2016

There's lots of odds and ends you might not think of. Dreft detergent (if you plan to use it), baby thermometers- including a rectal one, infant meds like Tylenol or ibuprofen and gas drops (that way you have it on hand when baby gets sick the first time), nose suckers, just little stuff people might not think of.

skruhmin · January 2016

Also doubles and triples of the small stuff you will need in multiple places - like if you have multiple stories, you can have on hand on all levels so you don't have to do stairs all the time. Also think of your diaper bag - like tummy meds, Tylenol, diaper rash cream, teething tabs, tons of receiving blankets/burp rags

irenewslee · January 2016

Toys and books - I personally like to pick out fun things for babies when I go to baby showers.
Future items needed for the baby - You can go as far as age of two and think of what you may need. Things like sippy/straw cups, plates and utensils, activity table, etc.
Clothing items - Bibs, blankets, hair accessories, shoes....

Depending where you are registered at, you can always return the items and get store credit for your future purchases. Gift cards are always good too.

CecilB93 · January 2016

tJaffe said:
I registered for the essentials for the 1st year. Big things included. I went through BRU because of the discount and e-gift card they send, but also because I'm using bum genius diapers and they have those.... But anyway, I can use the discount code for those bigger items that aren't purchased. The teachers at my school always do a baby shower too so I put a lot of items $30 and under as well. Such as, spoons, sheets, cloth diapers, etc... But based on my family thrown baby shower, no one even looked at the registry except for 3 ppl. I got a ton of things that I didn't actually need.

My issue is that people did buy from my registry, but they didn't have it scanned on to it as being bought!! So now I don't get the 10% cash back deal they have on a lot of items. Sorry if that sounds bitchy or greedy, but DH and I are very tight financially and I was really hoping to use that to get the last few things we need at a cheaper out-of-pocket price.

Also not sure if anyone suggested this, but I got a handful of books at my shower and didn't even think to add them myself. So maybe a few of those could be a decently priced option to add? I agree with things like laundry detergent, soap and lotion for baby, Tylenol, I even put a couple nursing bras on mine just because. Honestly, people will buy stuff regardless of it being on your registry or not, so I wouldn't stress too much about adding a whole lot more.

jenniferamcooper · January 2016

You should consider addinf things for your home. We added extra towels, a kitchen storage thing (we stored baby stuff like containers in it), tiny mason jars for baby food storage, etc.

Turns out or first had terrible terrible reflux and we definitely needed those extra towels for times 1 or 2 receiving blankets wouldn't cut it (or the 15 or so we had were all in the wash).

mamaroar · January 2016

When you set up a registry at Target.com, they ask you in the setup process if you want giftcards included in the registry or not. If you opt to include them, then they are the FIRST THING that comes up when people find your registry. Like a banner across the top that says "this registry accepts giftcards" or something like that, with prompts to add giftcard to the cart!

Also - I asked for specific wording to be included on my invites "Please bring a book that you loved as a child, OR a book that you loved reading to your child, and sign the inside cover of the book!"

I was at a shower where the host's gift to the mom to be was a handmade bookshelf, so she asked for all the books to fill it at the shower. Books are a modestly priced gift, but the most fun of the shower was seeing what books people had brought, and hearing their stories about how "my baby loved this one so much" or "my mom read this to me so many times when I was little." And the books ranged from the old school Beatrix Potter type stuff, to newer books I'd never heard of before. It was really delightful so I totally ripped the idea off for my shower!

LuckyCookie80 · January 2016

When I registered, BRU advised for me to remember people tend to buy one larger/more expensive item (i.e. high chair, boppy, etc) or 5-7 smaller/less expensive items (pacifiers, bottles, toys, wipes, etc.). I tried to keep this in mind when I registered so there would be something in everyone's budget. I only registered for a handful of clothing items; however, when I recently checked they're already on clearance! I've gone back and deleted them off my registry and opted for the staple clothing that is carried year round (i.e. white onezies in several sizes).

amyid · January 2016

With an unexpected surgery and spending the past month in hospital, I'm now not working until baby comes as I had expected - having said that, with the loss of 3 months of income and tons for this for baby still to buy, I have piled on the things on my baby registry, I don't expect anything but I will truly be grateful for the generosity of family and friends given the circumstances and huge game changer that's left me very nervous about getting just the "essentials". I figure even small items that are rally uneeded that people tend to buy can be returned and that money can go towards bigger ticket items at the same store like a stroller or car seat, picking out a few clothes on a registry seems a good idea to let people know your personal taste and preference ( especially for me as I like plain and simple, no lime green, orange or dinosaurs please ! ) diapers and wipes seem like they are coming to the shower wether you want/need them or not and of course little things like pacifiers and blankets. The idea of books sounds fantastic to me, I'd originally set up a amazon registry to ask for bilingual books as gifts but with said financial troubles now I'm hoping to get the "essential" items at my shower. Donating diapers to a local shelter also sounds like a wonderful idea, I'm sure you'll get plenty at your shower that you can give to a local charity ! If in doubt, put gift cards on your registry ! I added gift cards to mine today which seemed weird and "greedy" but I think it's the easiest option for some people and like I said before, can help you towards the big ticket items and things in the future 6 months from now when baby has some new needs

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