Hi everyone, I've been wondering about this lately... I know it can take a healthy couple a year to conceive, and so the general advice is not to have any testing done until you've been TTC for 12 months. But in TCOYF I remember reading that you should consider testing after 6 perfectly timed cycles (even if you are under 35). By perfectly timed, I mean sex at least twice during the FW and that the FW is confirmed by temping. Is anyone considering testing after 6 months instead of 12?
TTC since January 2015 3/15/2015 BFP! 4/15/2015 MMC 2/25/2016 BFP! Hoping for the best!
Thinking about it, yes. Following through with it, no. Mostly because doctors typically will still refuse. Many of them are not on board with temping, etc, so they will make you wait regardless.
I think we got help around 9 months into TTC #1. I was 22 at the time ( I got married at 21) and my husband and became very distraught and said " I think it's my fault". He recalled having surgery when he was very little (4 or 5) for undescended testes. It had completely escaped his memory. So, he went to a urologist and had an SA done and his sperm counts were low with low motility. The doctor said he was sub-fertile and gave us a 0-4 % chance of conception each month.
I don't think it would hurt to start doctor shopping. You want to find a good RE if you go that route- the first one we used wasn't as good as my OB now. It takes awhile to set up the first consultation and the appointment may be a month or so out anyway. My OB is also a RE and told us my H should not have been labeled with the MFI diagnosis after a single SA. He said the average of 3 SAs should be taken. Which makes more sense to me, since we have 2 children naturally without intervention.
Eta sorry for the ramble. I've had a lot of coffee. What I'm saying is maybe start doing your research and homework now. Spend 2 months on that and you're already 8 months into TTC. Add another month to get in the door and you're at 9 months TTC. By the time testing is completed you're at 10 months.
@linnea625 I wondered about that as well when I was reading TCOYF. I get the thinking behind it, but like @LizaKate1213 said most doctors wouldn't do anything at 6 months anyway. I almost wish she had left that part out of the book. It is just one more thing to make women assume that something is wrong with them if they take a little longer to get KU.
Does anyone know if the 12 month requirement has to be 12 months of trying consecutively?
@PocketFullofShells Yes, I have and we have had good timing every month. I also just found out that my thyroid levels are not where they should be when TTC, which can make it more difficult to conceive so I do have a reason to go in. But I would still consider going in after 6 months if I didn't find that out.
I'm in Canada so it may be different, but I asked my family doctor about it at around 4-5 months. I just asked if there was any preliminary testing that we could do that could give us a clue if there was something wrong, and she did confirm that sometimes if a problem is found that way then you can be "fast tracked" to a fertility clinic.
She had me do some bloodwork and we found that I had low thyroid and I'm now on Synthroid everyday. Apparently low thyroid can affect fertility and can impact the growing (or not growing) fetus.
I'm not in this position but wanted to chime in. My BFF took 9 months to conceive her first. She was starting to get worried around cycle 6 but her doctor wouldn't give her a referral until it had been 1 year. For her second, she got KU on cycle 2. I'm going to agree with @PocketFullofShells, unless you have another medical condition that you think could be preventing you from conceiving, I think being patient (as hard as it is) is the way to go. You can always have a conversation with your doctor about your concerns and see what he/she says but I think it's pretty rare for a doc to agree to testing without cause.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
@PocketFullofShells Yes, I have and we have had good timing every month. I also just found out that my thyroid levels are not where they should be when TTC, which can make it more difficult to conceive so I do have a reason to go in. But I would still consider going in after 6 months if I didn't find that out.
Why? If you have NO reason to suspect that you might have a problem, why would you go?
That's just a frustrating thing to say.
edited for clarity
Because the research I have read has said that most couples my age will get pregnant within 6 months, especially with good timing. Yeah, maybe I would still get pregnant naturally after month 6, but some couples also get pregnant naturally after month 12, but it is still fine to see someone if you don't get pregnant naturally before then. I mean, if something is wrong I don't want to wait another 6 months before I can go see someone.
@bcooke314 - have you been temping to confirm ovulation for the past 5 months?
The reason I would encourage any of you ladies to wait until you are closer to your year mark is that many RE's are extremely busy and you could be stealing an appointment for someone who has been trying much longer. Unless you have a serious reason to think you may be infertile (like @iceandsnowflakes29), you should consider yourself fertile and wait your year.
I agree. Also, check your insurance. My insurance will not allow for covered testing unless my OB signs off for the fact I've been TTC a year.
I was not-trying-not-preventing for a year, but that's not exactly active TTC.
I'm not sure why anyone would want to jump on the testing train? It's not pleasant, can be expensive & could be fruitless. Infertility is not a chic club to join...
@PocketFullofShells But with your logic, someone could naturally conceive in cycle 14 but since they decided to go after 12 months they are stealing an appointment from someone else.
If 12 months of unprotected sex, even if it hasn't been purposefully timed, is enough reason to think something is wrong and see a doctor, why is 6 months of well-timed sex and no pregnancy not enough reason to think something is wrong?
Have you never gone to any other doctor for a "what if"?
I wanted to get tested at six months but my Dr refused until 12 months. I got ku month 10 but ended in a mc. I hope it doesn't take another 10 months. Oh I had my gallbladder taken out in Oct and they found endometriosis. I really think clearing that helped me get ku. I just wish I could have discovered that sooner.
I also get annoyed with these posts because there are those that have "paid their dues" on the TTC Trek & now have to wait extra time because someone else wants to arm-flail & take their spot in line at 6 months TTC. Resources are limited & it's not like your time/medical situation is more important than someone else who has put in the time to TTC the average amount (12 months or longer).
These posts frustrate me. I'm not infertile (as far as I know), but #3 is taking longer than either of my others. Why? I can guess I'm older, breastfeeding, and sometimes our timing was crappy. I don't automatically jump to infertility. It's just not reasonable for me.
I don't think it's reasonable for the average couple either, to be frank. Chart your 12 months & then schedule. Leave the RE's open schedules for those who've been patient before you. It's the considerate thing to do. Everyone wants a baby & waiting your turn for assistance is just good manners, IMHO. You don't cut in line in a queue, right? Same rules apply.
Also, I don't remember who asked-- but the months total, consecutive is what's been told to me. My CNM (midwife) & OB team specified 12 months of active TTC (best demonstrated via paper or computer charts) in a row. It "resets" after a pregnancy or loss.
My NTNP for 15 months was a concern, but not enough to warrant a referral. My insurance is also very peticular & paying out of pocket for IF testing *I might not need* is just setting fire to my money.
Anyway, the reason this chaps my ass as much as it does is for the friends (online & off) that have had to wait so long for basic appointments to figure it all out. If the 4-6 month TTC's join the queue then it's even longer & less resources. These women have waited & no one is more special to think that the rules don't apply to them.
If you are having thyroid issues? Go to fix that. Don't jump on the IF train because you "just feel like it".
I think @PocketFullofShells said it best. IF is a really shitty club to join. Sex is no longer fun and everything done is according to a schedule. You should have sex at this time on this day whether you want to or not. Don't borrow trouble. It's very expensive and requires WEEKLY appointments. Even with really good insurance, that's weekly copays and weekly vacation time from work. Don't borrow trouble.
Obviously the 6 vs 12 month “rule” isn’t a hard and fast
rule that pertains to every woman. For example, my obgyn told me 6 months
because of existing circumstances that affect my fertility. (This was a
recommendation she made prior to us officially TTC and despite the fact that I
am under 35.) That being said, if you haven’t already, I think you should talk
to your regular gyn before you jump to the conclusion that you need tests at
the 6 month mark. There are minimal tests that could be done there without
having to schedule an appointment with an RE if your gyn deems them necessary.
Okay everyone. I never said I wantto have to go through all the testing. I definitely don't want to be infertile. I want to conceive naturally, as, I'm sure, does everyone else.
I guess I didn't realize that, even though TCOYF is hailed as the TTC bible, everyone ignores this one part.
And I really didn't mean to offend anyone. I'm sorry that I did.
I'm in a similar boat, however, an RE wouldn't help you with that. You need to see an endocrinologist about your thyroid specifically. The research I've conducted indicates that your TSH levels have to be under a 2 to carry a healthy pregnancy. I'm seeing an thyroid endocrinologist this month.
OP & other PP's - If I may make a suggestion: Please see your gynecologist AND General Practitioner before seeing an RE (unless you have a good reason to), it never hurts to make sure you're in OVERALL good physical shape (not just your reproductive organs, there are alot of other health factors that play into your fertility). You need a yearly checkup from both anyway, and you won't be taking the appointment away from a couple who has potentially been trying much longer.
Met DH - 9/2003
Dating - 9/18/2012
Married - 8/16/2014
NTNP - 7/2014-5/2015
TTC #1 - 5/2015 (CP October @ 4w2d)
*PCOS/Hypothyroid/Ectopic Kidney/High DHEA-S* HSG - All clear, ectopic kidney didn't affect uterus (yay!) CT Adrenal Scan - no tumors! SA - sperm count excellent, 2% Morphology March/April IUI scheduled - surprise BFP w/ help of Progesterone - 3/18/2016 Beta #1 @ 11dpo - 45.7 #2 @ 14dpo - 163 #3 @ 18dpo - 997 #4 @ 21dpo - 3799 EDD 12/1 based on O, 11/28 per Ob/Gyn (but he's wrong lol).
I have an infertility diagnosis. I received my infertility diagnosis in October. My first RE appointment is in February. I have now been waiting more than 2 months to see an RE and have 5 weeks left.
Most doctors won't see you before 1 year of actively trying. The ONLY reason I went to my doctor earlier, and the ONLY reason that she saw me at 5 months was because I have a problem that became evident once I stopped hormonal contraception.
@PrimRoseMama I was the one who asked about whether the 12 months had to be consecutive. Thank you for the info. I'm only counting the last couple months of actually TTC personally, but H is concerned because we were TTC a couple of years ago for around 9 months and were NTNP for over a year and a half before actively TTC again. I'm trying to reduce his stress about this as much as possible so hopefully knowing that a doc wouldn't count it will help. Thanks again!
Any book can say whatever they want. Even though TCOYF has some great information in it, that doesn't mean we hold her every view point as gospel. 6 months, with no reason to think otherwise, is early.
I have a condition known to cause fertility problems & am over 35 and didn't even go to the RE until after 1 loss and 8 months TTC again after it with no luck. Being an RE patient pretty much sucks with time and cost. I agree with others that it is a club you really don't want to have to join.
@PrimRoseMama I was the one who asked about whether the 12 months had to be consecutive. Thank you for the info. I'm only counting the last couple months of actually TTC personally, but H is concerned because we were TTC a couple of years ago for around 9 months and were NTNP for over a year and a half before actively TTC again. I'm trying to reduce his stress about this as much as possible so hopefully knowing that a doc wouldn't count it will help. Thanks again!
When in doubt ask your provider & insurance company. The answer varies, but yes. Hump it out!
Re: Getting fast-tracked for testing at 6 months in Canada.
From what I understand, this is only done in cases where either a medical precedent makes natural conception unlikely, or a long TTC period can otherwise negatively affect health. Patients in this situation are under a similar protocol than patients over 35. Not sure how province-specific this is (health care is provincially regulated) so I can only speak for Ontario and Quebec.
For me, this was the established course of action at my preconception appointment, and agreed on between my gyn and my rheumatologist. I'll be getting get referred out this month, though my appointment will likely not be until a couple of months after that.
Like PPs said, this is a scary prospect, and I want nothing to do with riding particular this train, but an autoimmune disease can only stay untreated so long before going out of remission, and I have some worrisome medical history that is very likely to complicate conception, so here we are.
Obviously the 6 vs 12 month “rule” isn’t a hard and fast
rule that pertains to every woman. For example, my obgyn told me 6 months
because of existing circumstances that affect my fertility. (This was a
recommendation she made prior to us officially TTC and despite the fact that I
am under 35.) That being said, if you haven’t already, I think you should talk
to your regular gyn before you jump to the conclusion that you need tests at
the 6 month mark. There are minimal tests that could be done there without
having to schedule an appointment with an RE if your gyn deems them necessary.
This is my situation too. I have PCOS and have been mostly anovulatory since having DD last year. We didn't try any amount of time before seeing doc, because what's the point if you aren't ovulating? If you are healthy, have normal periods, and have no reason to think you have a fertility issue, don't borrow trouble. Just enjoy the ride and focus on being the healthiest person you can be.
Okay everyone. I never said I wantto have to go through all the testing. I definitely don't want to be infertile. I want to conceive naturally, as, I'm sure, does everyone else.
I guess I didn't realize that, even though TCOYF is hailed as the TTC bible, everyone ignores this one part.
And I really didn't mean to offend anyone. I'm sorry that I did.
This one part does not reflect the state of the health care system in every region, or the economic situation of every patient. Reality does not line up with even the most useful guidebooks. That's not an excuse to delay care for people who actually need it because you are impatient.
Thanks for all your replies. I didn't realize this would be such a hot topic. 6 months seemed early to me, but since TCOYF is so highly respected, I wanted to see what you guys thought. I'm sorry if this question offended any TTC "veterans" Looks like I'll be waiting for the 12-month mark before taking other steps.
TTC since January 2015 3/15/2015 BFP! 4/15/2015 MMC 2/25/2016 BFP! Hoping for the best!
Thanks for all your replies. I didn't realize this would be such a hot topic. 6 months seemed early to me, but since TCOYF is so highly respected, I wanted to see what you guys thought. I'm sorry if this question offended any TTC "veterans" Looks like I'll be waiting for the 12-month mark before taking other steps.
The question (by itself) isn't offensive. You're good.
While I whole heartedly agree that impatience does not equal infertility, I DO believe that impatience is a TOTALLY NORMAL emotion during this process. It is OK to feel impatient. I'm not saying run off to the doctor now but, that emotion is normal and there's no shame in it.
It took me 4 years to conceive my first and 1 year to conceive my second and I still have the patience level equivalent to a teaspoon. Everything about TTC is filled with wait.
If there's 2 things I've learned from this journey it is that impatience and jealousy are NORMAL. You just have to try to work through it.
@PocketFullofShells But with your logic, someone could naturally conceive in cycle 14 but since they decided to go after 12 months they are stealing an appointment from someone else.
If 12 months of unprotected sex, even if it hasn't been purposefully timed, is enough reason to think something is wrong and see a doctor, why is 6 months of well-timed sex and no pregnancy not enough reason to think something is wrong?
Have you never gone to any other doctor for a "what if"?
12 months is medical standard. So no-- 6 months of well-timed sex under 35 years of age? No, not a medically sound reason to jump the gun for IF testing. Why do you seem to WANT to be infertile? This is baffling to me.
Obviously the 6 vs 12 month “rule” isn’t a hard and fast
rule that pertains to every woman. For example, my obgyn told me 6 months
because of existing circumstances that affect my fertility. (This was a
recommendation she made prior to us officially TTC and despite the fact that I
am under 35.) That being said, if you haven’t already, I think you should talk
to your regular gyn before you jump to the conclusion that you need tests at
the 6 month mark. There are minimal tests that could be done there without
having to schedule an appointment with an RE if your gyn deems them necessary.
I think this is a good compromise. I had concerns with long and irregular cycles and my PCP ran some bloodwork even before we officially started trying before prescribing Provera. I think she checked my thyroids, LSH, FH and prolactin? I don't know if there are others you can get tested for by your PCP or OBGYN - I don't think she ordered the full gamut of infertility bloodwork because that's not really what I was concerned about at the time. Could the men get their SA done through their PCP or urologist ahead of going to an RE? Personally, I wouldn't want to preemptively jump to the conclusion of infertility, and I do get feeling anxious and wanting to make sure something isn't wrong, but I also respect that there are limited resources and the specialists should be left available for those that actually need them. I think if there are simple tests that can be done by PCPs or OBGYNs to rule things out, that would be the first step and that may be enough to put people's minds at ease for the time being.
It all depends on your health. My OB/GYN told me to start getting infertility testing done since we've been actively trying for at least 8 months and NT/NP for 5 months before that and I've been off BCP for a few years. So she's recommending it. There are two ways to look at it if you're thinking about going in: 1. You could be jumping the gun and find out nothing is wrong with you. You waste some money and time but you know you're good. 2. You find out there is something wrong. Now you have the information of what can and can't be done so now you can prepare for alternatives. Talk to your OB/GYN first and see what they say, if you have medical conditions that may make it difficult they may recommend it. Or they may tell you to wait a few more months.
I agree with @crownedj, I think it depends on your health history and your financial situation.
So this might be TMI but I'm going to share anyway. I made some bad choices in college and caught a certain infection (please don't ask me what it was, I'm so embarrassed as it is. I refuse to say it) that went unnoticed for up to 10 months before I was finally diagnosed. Got back together with the same guy at one point and guess what came back (again undiagnosed for like 2 months). I was high risk for tubal damage because of this infection and how long it went unnoticed, so I had an HSG done VERY early in my TTC journey just to rule out structural tubal issues. My logic was if my dumb ass mistake caused a problem, I wanted to know about it NOW and was fine paying through the nose for the test - i.e., if my previous choices created an issue, I wanted to catch it early, and figure out if it would be treatable. I didn't want to go through hell every month worrying it was my fault for an entire year. My stress levels were really through the roof worrying over this, and I'm sure doing nothing good for our TTC efforts. My regular obgyn was able to order the test, and I just went to another facility for the actual HSG. Don't worry, I called 2 days before I wanted to schedule the test and they had like 3 time slots open, so I wasn't stealing appointments from anyone!
But this was MY choice to spend MY money so I could stop worrying that not getting pregnant was all MY fault. I also struggle with anxiety and depression, so for me having the test done was worth 100x the actual dollar amount for the sake of my emotional health. I'm more comfortable trying now, and any unsuccessful cycles I can just chalk up to chance.
All that being said, I don't plan to seek out an actual RE for additional testing unless we are still struggling for a take home baby this summer, and will be nearly at our 1 year mark. No one wants to join the infertility camp, but I understand wanting the peace of mind that test results can offer, or getting a jump on treatment if necessary.
Obviously the 6 vs 12 month “rule” isn’t a hard and fast rule that pertains to every woman. For example, my obgyn told me 6 months because of existing circumstances that affect my fertility. (This was a recommendation she made prior to us officially TTC and despite the fact that I am under 35.) That being said, if you haven’t already, I think you should talk to your regular gyn before you jump to the conclusion that you need tests at the 6 month mark. There are minimal tests that could be done there without having to schedule an appointment with an RE if your gyn deems them necessary.
This is my situation too. I have PCOS and have been mostly anovulatory since having DD last year. We didn't try any amount of time before seeing doc, because what's the point if you aren't ovulating? If you are healthy, have normal periods, and have no reason to think you have a fertility issue, don't borrow trouble. Just enjoy the ride and focus on being the healthiest person you can be.
***ETA QBF***
I agree with this. Most women should wait a year, but if you have a known issue that can cause infertility that may be a reason to go earlier.
I'm in month 7, but I have PCOS and therefore am seeing an RE tomorrow morning. I wasn't expecting to be referred so quickly, but both my GYN and the RE's office said I should be seen now.
However, I also am fortunate to live in an area with roughly eleventy billion REs. It took me less than two weeks to get an appointment. I was fully expecting to get an appointment 2-3 months down the road, meaning I would have been seen in month 9 or 10.
I had the same thought as OP when I read that in TCOYF, but then I really thought about it. As much as I hate waiting, I watched my sister deal with IF and 5+ years of treatment before she got to #1, and it's rough. I'd rather hope I'm just going to be one of those late people then start playing that game early for a lot of the reasons PPs (who have been there themselves) have said.
Watching her though is why I decided to start temping on my second cycle. Just confirming O is, to me, hugely reassuring on the it's just taking a while vs. IF debate.
I'm worried this may not have been coherent, but I'm clicking "post reply" anyway because today has been rough and it isn't going to get more coherent...
Me: 30 DH: 32 ~~ TTC #1: Sep 2015 ~~ BFP: Mar 2016 ~~ Daughter: Nov 2016 TTC #2: April 2018 ~~ BFP: May 2018 ~~ EDD: January 2019
TCOYF is a great resource, but it doesn't have to be right about everything. You can't say the book (or almost any other book) is 100% accurate and can't be disputed in any way. After 6 months MAY indicate something is wrong, but not necessarily. And like PPs said, most insurance won't cover what little IF treatment they will without 12 months TTC anyways. Don't borrow trouble unless you really, truly think you have an IF issue and have evidence besides lack of being KTFU to back it up.
I went in for my annual in August after 5 months TTC and brought up TTC and we talked about my concerning menstrual history (I was only on BC for 1.5 yrs and have my entire AF history since menarche- so ~10 yrs) as well as not ovulating. We decided to run some hormonal bloodwork and it came back that I have PCOS. I didn't expect bloodwork at that appointment either, but I'm glad she suggested it. It was ONLY after I had a Dx that I was able to get to go to an RE. I still didn't get to see an RE until mid October.
I also want to add that going through IF is not fun. I had to quit my job for my own sanity because the IF itself and medication is having a huge mental/emotional impact on me. You don't want to have to take super-duper hormone pills that can have unpleasant side effects or administer super-duper hormone shots into your abdomen that can give you cramps way worse than AF. I would take getting KU on/before 12 months "naturally" instead of IF treatment any day. Wait the 12 months.
Honorable mentions: Biggest IF support sister, sweetest bumpie, most genuine, LFAFer you'd most like to visit, great things come in small packages, pocket sized babe
I've been looking at the stats. There is some conflicting data, but it seems like 75-80% of couples get pregnant in 6 months, 85-92% are pregnant after 12 months. While some couples do go on to conceive "naturally" After 12 months, 1-3 additional years of trying brings it up to 93-95%.
This may be unpopular, but I actually disagree with some of the posters here. I always try to look at the science (I work in the medical field) when trying to figure these types of things out. There isn't a ton out there, but I did find a pretty good prospective study on a sample size of 346 women who were using fertility awareness methods to figure out their fertile window; controls were put into place for things like age, education, socioeconomic status, etc.
In the group, by the first cycle 38% of women were pregnant, by the 3rd cycle 68%, 81% at 6 cycles, and 92% at 12 cycles (for the truly fertile couples that actually conceived, the numbers were: 42, 75, 88 and 98% respectively) The authors conclude that every other woman after 6 cycles is either sub-fertile or infertile. They cautiously recommend a work-up after 6 cycles is warranted, although if you end up with something like unexplained (i.e. a "good prognosis"), probably better to go the full 12 cycles before pursuing something more invasive because you have a decent shot at conceiving naturally. Whereas if you're found to have poor prognosis you've "bought" yourself 6 months of time on your side.
WORF: I did not come here to
admire the scenery.
DAX: If you say so. I guess we should just go
home.
WORF: Well maybe. I would not be so hasty.
DAX: I take it the scenery has improved?
WORF: A few months ago, when I was commanding
the Defiant on a scouting mission in the Gamma Quadrant, we encountered a
protostar cluster, a swirling mass of colour set against a background of
glowing clouds and burning sky. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever
seen, until now.
DAX: I've got to take you on vacation more
often.
Re: Thoughts about advice in TCOYF?
I don't think it would hurt to start doctor shopping. You want to find a good RE if you go that route- the first one we used wasn't as good as my OB now. It takes awhile to set up the first consultation and the appointment may be a month or so out anyway. My OB is also a RE and told us my H should not have been labeled with the MFI diagnosis after a single SA. He said the average of 3 SAs should be taken. Which makes more sense to me, since we have 2 children naturally without intervention.
Eta sorry for the ramble. I've had a lot of coffee. What I'm saying is maybe start doing your research and homework now. Spend 2 months on that and you're already 8 months into TTC. Add another month to get in the door and you're at 9 months TTC. By the time testing is completed you're at 10 months.
Does anyone know if the 12 month requirement has to be 12 months of trying consecutively?
I'm in Canada so it may be different, but I asked my family doctor about it at around 4-5 months. I just asked if there was any preliminary testing that we could do that could give us a clue if there was something wrong, and she did confirm that sometimes if a problem is found that way then you can be "fast tracked" to a fertility clinic.
She had me do some bloodwork and we found that I had low thyroid and I'm now on Synthroid everyday. Apparently low thyroid can affect fertility and can impact the growing (or not growing) fetus.
Good luck!
I'm going to agree with @PocketFullofShells, unless you have another medical condition that you think could be preventing you from conceiving, I think being patient (as hard as it is) is the way to go. You can always have a conversation with your doctor about your concerns and see what he/she says but I think it's pretty rare for a doc to agree to testing without cause.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
I was not-trying-not-preventing for a year, but that's not exactly active TTC.
I'm not sure why anyone would want to jump on the testing train? It's not pleasant, can be expensive & could be fruitless. Infertility is not a chic club to join...
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
If 12 months of unprotected sex, even if it hasn't been purposefully timed, is enough reason to think something is wrong and see a doctor, why is 6 months of well-timed sex and no pregnancy not enough reason to think something is wrong?
Have you never gone to any other doctor for a "what if"?
~Formerly @dogmomwantinghuman ~
TTC #1 since January 2015
BFP #1: 11/30/15| MC 12/16/15BFP # 2: 6/2/16 | EDD 2/16/17
These posts frustrate me. I'm not infertile (as far as I know), but #3 is taking longer than either of my others. Why? I can guess I'm older, breastfeeding, and sometimes our timing was crappy. I don't automatically jump to infertility. It's just not reasonable for me.
I don't think it's reasonable for the average couple either, to be frank. Chart your 12 months & then schedule. Leave the RE's open schedules for those who've been patient before you. It's the considerate thing to do. Everyone wants a baby & waiting your turn for assistance is just good manners, IMHO. You don't cut in line in a queue, right? Same rules apply.
Also, I don't remember who asked-- but the months total, consecutive is what's been told to me. My CNM (midwife) & OB team specified 12 months of active TTC (best demonstrated via paper or computer charts) in a row. It "resets" after a pregnancy or loss.
My NTNP for 15 months was a concern, but not enough to warrant a referral. My insurance is also very peticular & paying out of pocket for IF testing *I might not need* is just setting fire to my money.
Anyway, the reason this chaps my ass as much as it does is for the friends (online & off) that have had to wait so long for basic appointments to figure it all out. If the 4-6 month TTC's join the queue then it's even longer & less resources. These women have waited & no one is more special to think that the rules don't apply to them.
If you are having thyroid issues? Go to fix that. Don't jump on the IF train because you "just feel like it".
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
Obviously the 6 vs 12 month “rule” isn’t a hard and fast rule that pertains to every woman. For example, my obgyn told me 6 months because of existing circumstances that affect my fertility. (This was a recommendation she made prior to us officially TTC and despite the fact that I am under 35.) That being said, if you haven’t already, I think you should talk to your regular gyn before you jump to the conclusion that you need tests at the 6 month mark. There are minimal tests that could be done there without having to schedule an appointment with an RE if your gyn deems them necessary.
I guess I didn't realize that, even though TCOYF is hailed as the TTC bible, everyone ignores this one part.
And I really didn't mean to offend anyone. I'm sorry that I did.
OP & other PP's - If I may make a suggestion: Please see your gynecologist AND General Practitioner before seeing an RE (unless you have a good reason to), it never hurts to make sure you're in OVERALL good physical shape (not just your reproductive organs, there are alot of other health factors that play into your fertility). You need a yearly checkup from both anyway, and you won't be taking the appointment away from a couple who has potentially been trying much longer.
HSG - All clear, ectopic kidney didn't affect uterus (yay!)
CT Adrenal Scan - no tumors!
SA - sperm count excellent, 2% Morphology
March/April IUI scheduled - surprise BFP w/ help of Progesterone - 3/18/2016
Beta #1 @ 11dpo - 45.7 #2 @ 14dpo - 163 #3 @ 18dpo - 997 #4 @ 21dpo - 3799
EDD 12/1 based on O, 11/28 per Ob/Gyn (but he's wrong lol).
*TEAM BLUE!*
Most doctors won't see you before 1 year of actively trying. The ONLY reason I went to my doctor earlier, and the ONLY reason that she saw me at 5 months was because I have a problem that became evident once I stopped hormonal contraception.
Me: 39 DH: 40
Married: 12/6/2014
BFP#2: 10/28/15 MC: 11/24/15
BFP#3: 3/20/16 MC: 4/26/16
BFP#4: 7/15/16 DD: 3/18/17
BFP#5: 5/1/18 EDD: 1/12/19
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
From what I understand, this is only done in cases where either a medical precedent makes natural conception unlikely, or a long TTC period can otherwise negatively affect health. Patients in this situation are under a similar protocol than patients over 35. Not sure how province-specific this is (health care is provincially regulated) so I can only speak for Ontario and Quebec.
For me, this was the established course of action at my preconception appointment, and agreed on between my gyn and my rheumatologist. I'll be getting get referred out this month, though my appointment will likely not be until a couple of months after that.
Like PPs said, this is a scary prospect, and I want nothing to do with riding particular this train, but an autoimmune disease can only stay untreated so long before going out of remission, and I have some worrisome medical history that is very likely to complicate conception, so here we are.
Lilo and Stitch (2002)
ETA: a word
Lilo and Stitch (2002)
TTC since January 2015
3/15/2015 BFP!
4/15/2015 MMC
2/25/2016 BFP! Hoping for the best!
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
It took me 4 years to conceive my first and 1 year to conceive my second and I still have the patience level equivalent to a teaspoon. Everything about TTC is filled with wait.
If there's 2 things I've learned from this journey it is that impatience and jealousy are NORMAL. You just have to try to work through it.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
1. You could be jumping the gun and find out nothing is wrong with you. You waste some money and time but you know you're good.
2. You find out there is something wrong. Now you have the information of what can and can't be done so now you can prepare for alternatives.
Talk to your OB/GYN first and see what they say, if you have medical conditions that may make it difficult they may recommend it. Or they may tell you to wait a few more months.
Eta we really only saw the RE for IUIs.
So this might be TMI but I'm going to share anyway. I made some bad choices in college and caught a certain infection (please don't ask me what it was, I'm so embarrassed as it is. I refuse to say it) that went unnoticed for up to 10 months before I was finally diagnosed. Got back together with the same guy at one point and guess what came back (again undiagnosed for like 2 months). I was high risk for tubal damage because of this infection and how long it went unnoticed, so I had an HSG done VERY early in my TTC journey just to rule out structural tubal issues. My logic was if my dumb ass mistake caused a problem, I wanted to know about it NOW and was fine paying through the nose for the test - i.e., if my previous choices created an issue, I wanted to catch it early, and figure out if it would be treatable. I didn't want to go through hell every month worrying it was my fault for an entire year. My stress levels were really through the roof worrying over this, and I'm sure doing nothing good for our TTC efforts. My regular obgyn was able to order the test, and I just went to another facility for the actual HSG. Don't worry, I called 2 days before I wanted to schedule the test and they had like 3 time slots open, so I wasn't stealing appointments from anyone!
But this was MY choice to spend MY money so I could stop worrying that not getting pregnant was all MY fault. I also struggle with anxiety and depression, so for me having the test done was worth 100x the actual dollar amount for the sake of my emotional health. I'm more comfortable trying now, and any unsuccessful cycles I can just chalk up to chance.
All that being said, I don't plan to seek out an actual RE for additional testing unless we are still struggling for a take home baby this summer, and will be nearly at our 1 year mark. No one wants to join the infertility camp, but I understand wanting the peace of mind that test results can offer, or getting a jump on treatment if necessary.
***ETA QBF***
I agree with this. Most women should wait a year, but if you have a known issue that can cause infertility that may be a reason to go earlier.
I'm in month 7, but I have PCOS and therefore am seeing an RE tomorrow morning. I wasn't expecting to be referred so quickly, but both my GYN and the RE's office said I should be seen now.
However, I also am fortunate to live in an area with roughly eleventy billion REs. It took me less than two weeks to get an appointment. I was fully expecting to get an appointment 2-3 months down the road, meaning I would have been seen in month 9 or 10.
Married May 2012
TTC#1 July 2013 - July 2015 (no success)
Again TTC#1: Dec 2015
First RE visit: Feb 2016
BFP: 9/16/16 EDD:5/26/17
Watching her though is why I decided to start temping on my second cycle. Just confirming O is, to me, hugely reassuring on the it's just taking a while vs. IF debate.
I'm worried this may not have been coherent, but I'm clicking "post reply" anyway because today has been rough and it isn't going to get more coherent...
TTC #2: April 2018 ~~ BFP: May 2018 ~~ EDD: January 2019
I went in for my annual in August after 5 months TTC and brought up TTC and we talked about my concerning menstrual history (I was only on BC for 1.5 yrs and have my entire AF history since menarche- so ~10 yrs) as well as not ovulating. We decided to run some hormonal bloodwork and it came back that I have PCOS. I didn't expect bloodwork at that appointment either, but I'm glad she suggested it. It was ONLY after I had a Dx that I was able to get to go to an RE. I still didn't get to see an RE until mid October.
I also want to add that going through IF is not fun. I had to quit my job for my own sanity because the IF itself and medication is having a huge mental/emotional impact on me. You don't want to have to take super-duper hormone pills that can have unpleasant side effects or administer super-duper hormone shots into your abdomen that can give you cramps way worse than AF. I would take getting KU on/before 12 months "naturally" instead of IF treatment any day. Wait the 12 months.
3/2015: Start TTC
8/2015: PCOS Dx
4/2016: BFP, Loss (4+5)
2/2017: BFP
Honorable mentions: Biggest IF support sister, sweetest bumpie, most genuine, LFAFer you'd most like to visit, great things come in small packages, pocket sized babe
In the group, by the first cycle 38% of women were pregnant, by the 3rd cycle 68%, 81% at 6 cycles, and 92% at 12 cycles (for the truly fertile couples that actually conceived, the numbers were: 42, 75, 88 and 98% respectively) The authors conclude that every other woman after 6 cycles is either sub-fertile or infertile. They cautiously recommend a work-up after 6 cycles is warranted, although if you end up with something like unexplained (i.e. a "good prognosis"), probably better to go the full 12 cycles before pursuing something more invasive because you have a decent shot at conceiving naturally. Whereas if you're found to have poor prognosis you've "bought" yourself 6 months of time on your side.
Here's a copy of the article:
https://humrep.oxfordjournals.org/content/18/9/1959.full
WORF: I did not come here to admire the scenery.
DAX: If you say so. I guess we should just go home.
WORF: Well maybe. I would not be so hasty.
DAX: I take it the scenery has improved?
WORF: A few months ago, when I was commanding the Defiant on a scouting mission in the Gamma Quadrant, we encountered a protostar cluster, a swirling mass of colour set against a background of glowing clouds and burning sky. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, until now.
DAX: I've got to take you on vacation more often.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards: