If you're not enjoying pregnancy...

MississippiCatfish · January 2016

What do you say when others ask, "How are you feeeeeeling!? Do you like being pregnant!? Will you be sad when it's over??" types of questions?

I want to just smile and say "Mmhmm, it's great" but I just can't get myself to lie. Not that I complain, but I usually say something like, "I'm definitely ready. 38 days til my due date, not that I'm counting!"

On NYE, my aunt was like "I always say, they're easier in there (my belly) than out here!" And I was like "Nope! Third time around, third time I think a newborn is easier than being this pregnant."

Just curious how ya'll are choosing to respond!

BabyHope2013 · January 2016

Being a STM I think that they are easier while they are in your belly until about the last month of pregnancy. Then I'm ready for them to just be out in the world. It's harder to move, sleep and pretty much do anything at this point. I'm counting down the days till I have a newborn again. Though newborns are tough sometimes---at least the heartburn will be gone.

summererdvig · January 2016

When people ask how I'm feeling I usually say "I'm alright" or "I'm hanging in there". I used to answer much more enthusiastically (I LOVED being pregnant for the longest time) but I've been so uncomfortable lately I don't even know what to do with myself. I've actually started being open with my complaints, in the hopes that they will stop asking lol which sounds mean but how comfortable can someone really be when they're this large?! I know people are nice and making small talk but the last thing I want to do first thing in the morning in the break room is be reminded of how little sleep I got, how badly my hips were hurting, how often I got up to pee and how bad my heartburn was.

g0lightly8706 · January 2016

i usually say 'i'm doing good but cannot wait till she's here and i can hold her!' i don't like complaining so i usually try not to gripe about the fact that my pelvic bone is killing me lately and i'm exhausted all the time. oh the joys of third trimester…

Achae · January 2016

I just lie and say "oh the usual but I really can't complain!" I mean my biggest complaint is my SPD but trying to explain to people about groin pain from your ligaments stretching just seems TMI. And I'll usually smile and agree and say "oh I know, any day now!"

g8trkim · January 2016

MississippiCatfish said:
What do you say when others ask, "How are you feeeeeeling!? Do you like being pregnant!? Will you be sad when it's over??" types of questions?

I want to just smile and say "Mmhmm, it's great" but I just can't get myself to lie. Not that I complain, but I usually say something like, "I'm definitely ready. 38 days til my due date, not that I'm counting!"

On NYE, my aunt was like "I always say, they're easier in there (my belly) than out here!" And I was like "Nope! Third time around, third time I think a newborn is easier than being this pregnant."

Just curious how ya'll are choosing to respond!

Ditto about it being the third! Being pregnant with two small children kind of sucks. We're so blessed and very excited, but it's still not fun. If people ask I don't go off about being miserable but I admit that I'm getting ready and uncomfortable.

thisusername · January 2016

I tell the truth. This is my first and after everything ive gone through I'm already considering getting my tubes tied. It's been horrible. (Please don't respond with the cliche "it'll be worth it, yeah I know I get it, doesn't make it any better right now)

I know I make it sound so awful when people ask but hey, they made the mistake of talking to me lol

camusoh2011 · January 2016

I just tell people that I'm feeling very done.

meg+on+the+DL · January 2016

I am a FTM and I have lots of friends who are trying. I really try to keep my complaining down to a minimum. But sometimes I feel like trash or sometimes I ache so bad I can't move. I hate when people basically make me feel ungrateful for feeling this way. I'm so happy to be growing my little one, but can't we all agree it's damn hard sometimes?!

Here is what I want to say but I never really will!!

tabauder · January 2016

^^^ this meme is so funny and so true!!! ^^^

I usually respond with a sarcastic "I feel pregnant" when people ask how I'm feeling. If they continue and want to know more I'm pretty honest that I feel like crap but without going into much detail

MississippiCatfish · January 2016

Glad I'm not the only one who lets it out a little!

@maluevano I agree, I have a couple good friends who are in 1st and 2nd tri with their first children, one with a recent loss too, and I put on a happy face for them. They will find out soon enough (and already are) what the full scope of pregnancy is like:) I save any snark for people like my 50 year old co-worker who literally said, "Isn't pregnancy wonderful! Don't you just love it!?" Uhmmm...

ashton2190 · January 2016

My pregnancy has been very easy up until now, and if someone asks how's it's been, I tell them I've been very fortunate. For the past few weeks I've been getting really uncomfortable, achey, and ready for it to be over. The other day someone asked if they could get me anything and I ran through a list of about 100 things that would not be possible, like a full night's sleep, the ability to sit on the couch with DH where we're both comfortable, and general control over my body. It sucks sometimes but I try and remind myself I've had it really easy and it's almost over

Monkeybutt80 · January 2016

I have been battling a horrible chest / sinus cold which causes me to go into coughing fits. so these days when someone asks me how my pregnancy is going/ how I am feeling, I just tell them that I just wish I could stop peeing in my pants every time I cough. That usually stops them from asking further questions.

wisco29 · January 2016

"How are you feeling?"
"Good."

That question annoys me because they don't actually want to hear that my back hurts, hips hurt, butt hurts, I can't sleep well....! I would just answer it as vaguely as possible and move on

Kiek · January 2016

With my first I straight up told people that asked, that I was miserable and wanted her out yesterday lol. This time I just smile and say I'm ready to meet her but I need her to stay in there a little longer. Ever since my miscarriage I've been trying really hard not to complain about this pregnancy. But this little one certainly hasn't made it easy lol. What I want to say is I'm miserable and want her out yesterday lol

TheBeesBonnett · January 2016

The "how are you doing " question has been the most irritating. I definitely just smile and say good. It seems like if you utter a word about discomfort it opens up the door to people negating your opinion of your own experience. My baby bump also isn't huge in the spectrum of bumps, so it has felt like people write off how extremely uncomfortable I tell them I am. I may not be the biggest, but it's been an entire pregnancy of discomforts.
I pretty much just keep it to myself, and avoid social media . I'm annoyed that that's the approach I feel is the best, but I am more annoyed by unsolicited remarks and having my experience devalued.

thoughtfulmommy · January 2016

I normally just say that I am a little tired. That is not actually my complaint but I assume telling people about my pelvic pain or that sometimes it feels like she is falling out of my uterus is TMI.

funkypineapple · January 2016

I'm so sick of this question, mainly from certain CWs, that I just reply with "good" and immediately ask them how they are. I know they're referring to being pregnant but I just don't have the patience or feel like talking

If I don't reply with that, then I tell them straight up that I can't wait for it to be over with. Most people know that I've been sick the majority of this pregnancy (even as of this morning) but I don't have patience for those "it'll be so worth it" people.

Basically that meme above is me

srecupido · January 2016

wisco29 said:

"How are you feeling?" "Good." That question annoys me because they don't actually want to hear that my back hurts, hips hurt, butt hurts, I can't sleep well....! I would just answer it as vaguely as possible and move on

This. Right here. I know you don't want to hear anything except things are wonderful so why are we even having this conversation.

sheslikeasunburn · January 2016

I just say that I can't complain. While I am miserable at times, I feel bad complaining in case someone struggling with infertility, etc. is in earshot.

MississippiCatfish · January 2016

wisco29 said:

"How are you feeling?" "Good." That question annoys me because they don't actually want to hear that my back hurts, hips hurt, butt hurts, I can't sleep well....! I would just answer it as vaguely as possible and move on

I did this during my first pregnancy, which was also a rough one, and then people were like, 'But you had an easy pregnancy!!" which really grinded my gears! Haha.

You just can't win. People mean well but they're so weird.

TalulaPants · January 2016

I like to say, "Hanging in there!"
With a hefty sigh. Lol instead of:

"Great! I just peed myself a little."
"Fantastic! I slept 3 hours last night."
"Perfect! My feet are the size of a concrete block."
"Excellent. I haven't seen my vag in 4 months."

The list goes on and on. 29 days, y'all

gmjpeach1 · January 2016

I hate being pregnant. Its awful. I tell everyone and complain about it. My mother and other relatives used to tell me how easy and wonderful it is, so I felt it important to set the record straight. This is super important to my friends who are my age. Still excited to have a baby though.

blueberrymomma · January 2016

"How are you feeling?"=most annoying pregnancy question ever! Especially getting it multiple times a day.
My go to response is "Good, just tired" like pp said no one wants to hear about your pains down there, waking every hour to pee, tiny feet in your ribs, and BH

purplepenguin3 · January 2016

typically i just say "feelin' pregnant". There really isn't any other good way to explain it. and that way i hope to not offend anyone b/c it's true. by this time i think everyone is ready to be done.

mcklough · January 2016

Everyone- "How are you feeling?"
Me- "like shit, but she's doing well so it's ok"

That usually ends it and no one tries to tell me how to feel

Vkrosa · January 2016

TTM I'm tired. Like all the time I have aches and pains and when people ask me how I am I say I'm either uncomfortable or just tired. I'm not going to tell people I'm fine or great if I'm not.

Rodkey2007 · January 2016

gmjpeach1 said:
I hate being pregnant. Its awful. I tell everyone and complain about it. My mother and other relatives used to tell me how easy and wonderful it is, so I felt it important to set the record straight. This is super important to my friends who are my age. Still excited to have a baby though.

Abso-fricken-lutely!!!!! I wanted to strangle my husband the moment I found out I was pregnant- literally THE MOMENT I found out the "you did this to me!!" was screaming through my brain!! (Take a chill pill- I realize how it happens and that I had a part in it as well- but quite honestly, HE is the only reason I didn't have a tubal after our last pregnancy) but NO- I Am NOT enjoying it- I am miserable and in so much discomfort it's crazy. I think at this point, no one at work or members of my family would dare ask me how it was going. Strangers do every once in a while- usually it's "oh wow, how much longer do you have?" which I promptly reply "TOO MUCH LONGER." That usually gets my point across sufficiently.

winterviolethope · January 2016

With the exception of reflux and getting up a few times during the night to use the bathroom, I really feel almost the same as before I was pregnant. I'm 31 too so I'd imagine it'd be even easier if I were in my 20's. I know it's different for everyone - especially if you are overweight or have health problems but it's just hard to understand why it feels so bad to some people.

Cheryl Renee · January 2016

I don't see a point in lying about it. No, don't be rude, but hey, they asked right? So either they honestly care when asking and want an honest answer, or they are just being nice and will learn not to ask unless they want an honest response! lol
I've had a rough pregnancy, with nausea, food aversions, carpal tunnel, hyperglycemia, and anemia. So when I am asked how I'm feeling my response is usually something to the tune of "I'm ready for him to be out of there". I say it kinda laughingly, like I said, not trying to be rude but being honest. Its honest and most people will respond without it being awkward or anything.

MississippiCatfish · January 2016

LowerEastSiiide said:

With the exception of reflux and getting up a few times during the night to use the bathroom, I really feel almost the same as before I was pregnant. I'm 31 too so I'd imagine it'd be even easier if I were in my 20's. I know it's different for everyone - especially if you are overweight or have health problems but it's just hard to understand why it feels so bad to some people.

Yikes.

DrillSergeantCat · January 2016

LowerEastSiiide said:

With the exception of reflux and getting up a few times during the night to use the bathroom, I really feel almost the same as before I was pregnant. I'm 31 too so I'd imagine it'd be even easier if I were in my 20's. I know it's different for everyone - especially if you are overweight or have health problems but it's just hard to understand why it feels so bad to some people.

Because every pregnancy and every body is different maybe? You really seem to have issues with empathy.

TheBeesBonnett · January 2016

@LowerEastSiiide I'm not sure why you would come to a thread specifically for people who are having a different experience than you are to let them know you feel fine.?

ohbaby714 · January 2016

LowerEastSiiide said:
With the exception of reflux and getting up a few times during the night to use the bathroom, I really feel almost the same as before I was pregnant. I'm 31 too so I'd imagine it'd be even easier if I were in my 20's. I know it's different for everyone - especially if you are overweight or have health problems but it's just hard to understand why it feels so bad to some people.

Good for you?? Every single pregnancy is different and while some people may feel fine others may have a whole list of symptoms/complitcations. Try a little harder to understand.

thisusername · January 2016

LowerEastSiiide said:
With the exception of reflux and getting up a few times during the night to use the bathroom, I really feel almost the same as before I was pregnant. I'm 31 too so I'd imagine it'd be even easier if I were in my 20's. I know it's different for everyone - especially if you are overweight or have health problems but it's just hard to understand why it feels so bad to some people.

I'm 20, and in great shape pre pregnancy . This pregnancy has me praying I never get pregnant again. I've had a surgery, lost 23 pounds from intense vomiting, then gained weight back so quickly it tore a tendon in my leg, lost vision in one of my eyes for 3 days, had severe anxiety flare up and got smacked with depression so hard I was momentarily suidical(it was horrible, I hope I never feel that low again), and now that I'm almost done with pregnancy I can't stop throwing up and I can't keep my medications down. So now I'm fighting withdrawals from an antidepressant and the depression itself. Can't take my iron, my prenatals, or my pain pills either.

Yeah. Pregnancy is way easier in your 20s and I shouldn't complain.

(Yeah I know it'll be worth it when I see her, I hear that all the time. Doesn't change how stressful and hard this pregnancy has been despite being young)

cici613 · January 2016

I usually just say I'm hanging in there. Just can't say I'm good because I have been so uncomfortable the entire pregnancy. I'm a FTM and people keep telling me that being pregnant is better than having a newborn. NO WAY!!! I know it's hard to have a newborn. But at least someone can help me, like my husband, my mom or a babysitter. I will try my best so get all the help I need when the baby comes and try to be myself again. 41 days to go and just can't wait!!!!!

ashton2190 · January 2016

LowerEastSiiide said:
With the exception of reflux and getting up a few times during the night to use the bathroom, I really feel almost the same as before I was pregnant. I'm 31 too so I'd imagine it'd be even easier if I were in my 20's. I know it's different for everyone - especially if you are overweight or have health problems but it's just hard to understand why it feels so bad to some people.

So what value did that add to this discussion?

camusoh2011 · January 2016

LowerEastSiiide said:

With the exception of reflux and getting up a few times during the night to use the bathroom, I really feel almost the same as before I was pregnant. I'm 31 too so I'd imagine it'd be even easier if I were in my 20's. I know it's different for everyone - especially if you are overweight or have health problems but it's just hard to understand why it feels so bad to some people.

This kind of rubs me the wrong way. I mean, you're implying that the only reasons someone might not enjoy pregnancy is if they are overweight or have health problems. Some people enjoy having children but not pregnancy. Being in your 20's doesn't magically make pregnancy easier. You might consider the feel of a post before commenting since this whole thread was clearly meant for people who aren't loving pregnancy. I'm glad yours is going well, but this particular thread may not have been the best place for it.

beharrington · January 2016

I just answer "still pregnant" which is all I can say without complaining. I'm contracting, not getting any sleep, in pain everywhere. My close friends get the real scoop - everyone else gets "still pregnant".

kateryna72 · January 2016

When people ask me how I'm feeling I usually just say, "I'm fine, although feeling very pregnant and sore." Everyone knows I'm having twins, so that's kind of a given and everyone just sort of let's it go after I tell them that I just feel really pregnant, lol!