So I have been having light light spotting since 10DPO and what blew my mind was my breast tenderness never went away (it always goes away a day or 2 before starting AF), so I was genuinely confused as to what was happening because I was in the mindset implantation bleeding is rare from reading the boards. I also mentally convinced myself not to believe it possible that I would get pregnant this cycle, this tactic was actually helping me get through the TWW with less stress. Yesterday morning I decided to test with a wandfo just to get it out of my head, and I saw a faint line. I got so freaked out I dropped the wandfo in the toilet so I didn't have time to over analyze it. Luckily I had peed in an actual cup so I took out a digital and dipped it and it came back pregnant.
Guys....I am terrified of losing this pregnancy, irrationally, not sane, terrified. This was the exact same month I got pregnant last year and I only made it to 8 weeks. I am still having the light light spotting and this is not helping my state of mind. I had my progesterone tested yesterday at 12DPO and it is 28.4 so at least that number is good. I know that for my health I have to let this fear go. I never imagined it would be this hard, but right now I am pregnant.
I really want to thank you guys from the bottom of my heart for the support and help, the laughs and the over-shares. I have found a level of love and acceptance here that helps me keep my faith and hope in the good and magic of the world. I was reading a blog of a woman the other day who had a long TTC journey and one thing she wrote just struck me to my core- "never give up faith, never give up trying, never give up hope that it will happen for you." I wish for every woman on this board to always have hope that your BFP will come. Thank you, thank you!
Re: Ya'll... it was implantation bleeding (BFP and previous loss mentioned)
Keep us posted. Do you have an appt scheduled yet?
Husband: 40
TTC#1 since 9/2014
Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
@dolphin012 As long as I stay low risk I will be working with midwives for a homebirth. In that model the only ultrasound I would do would be at 20weeks. However, I will do one at 10weeks for the maternity21 test (downs testing and more) but will wait it out until then. Looking back I am really happy that this was the way it was for my last loss. I MC at 8 weeks, but I have a gut feeling the baby stopped growing at 6weeks. Had I gone in sooner I would have had to wait 2 weeks for the MC to happen naturally, I think it was easier for it to happen spontaneously without the waiting. The only thing I would have done differently is tested my progesterone to make sure that is not why it happened, which I did immediately this time and it isn't a problem. I might change my mind, the midwives will order me an ultrasound anytime I want, but the ultrasound won't change the outcome of the pregnancy so I figure I just have to wait and see.
I know how hard it is to wait and see...I'm sorry you have to brave the next several weeks.
Wishing you a h&h9 months
You are surrounded by love and support...hang in there! Xoxo
DS 4/2009
m/c 11/12/2010 ~ 7 wks
m/c 7/4/2012 ~ 6 wks
DD 12/2013
mmc Baby Girl 7/12/2015 ~ 14 weeks
Twin girls! 8/26/2017
7 IUIs, 7 BFNs.
2 IVF attempts, both cancelled and converted to IUI, both BFNs.
Decided that my tired old ovaries are ready to retire.
Next step- reciprocal IVF, using my wife's eggs, my uterus!
fresh 5 day transfer (2 embryos) 4/17/17- BFP!
Identical twins "due" 1/2/17 (but anticipated arrival sometime December)
Had to pop in and congratulate you!!! I completely understand your fear. I hope the time goes quickly and all goes well. Good luck!!
BFP 2/19/15 • MMC found at 9 wks • D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
BFP 8/29/15 • CP (age 37)
TTC#2 since May 2017
BFP 10/18/17 • MMC found at 8 wks • Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
BFP 2/16/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 4/13/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 5/07/18 • MMC found at 10.5 wks • D&E at 11.5 wks • Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
BFP 9/24/18 • CP (age 40)
NTNP since 11/12, actively trying since 8/14
11/15: Letrozole, Ovidrel, TI = BFP!!!
Beta #1(14dpo)=349, Beta #2(18dpo)=2,805
12/17/15: Got to see the heartbeat (105bpm)!
1/25/16: NT scan = normal (HB=163bpm)
EDD: 8/10/16
8/8/16: Baby boy born @ 12:25am, 8lbs, 20.5 inches
5/18/17: BFP!!! (11dpo)
Beta #1(12dpo)=176.4, Beta #2(15dpo)=607.1
TTC#1 since November 2015
9/16/2016 IUI#1 - BFN
10/12/2016 IUI#2 - BFN
1/21/2017 Clomid/IUI#3 - BFN
March 2017 IVF: BFP! (beta#1 191, beta#2 378!) - it's a boy! DS born 12/6/2017
TTC #2 since July 2018
May 2019 IVF #2: BFP! (beta#1 346, beta#2 646) - vanishing twin at 8 weeks. Baby B still going strong - due 2/8/20!
The fear is hard to go away. Just take deep breaths and know you have done and are going to continue to do everything in your power to hold on to this pregnancy. It is out of your control at this point.
This gives us all such high hopes! What a Happy New Year for you!! Without the Champagne!!
Me(38)PCOS/Hypothyroid DH(43)Low T/ED
MMC at 10 weeks 03/2011 DD born 01/2012 TTC #2 since 04/2014
BFP 8/26/2016
Congratulations! Thanks for all of your insights and motivation here. Just read your reply to the discussion about your "secret to success". Good reminder about the heated seats. I promptly sent a text to DH about that one! I'll especially miss your GTKY posts
This board has really been on fire lately with the BFPs! Hope to join you all on the other side in the new year!
TTC#1 since November 2015
9/16/2016 IUI#1 - BFN
10/12/2016 IUI#2 - BFN
1/21/2017 Clomid/IUI#3 - BFN
March 2017 IVF: BFP! (beta#1 191, beta#2 378!) - it's a boy! DS born 12/6/2017
TTC #2 since July 2018
May 2019 IVF #2: BFP! (beta#1 346, beta#2 646) - vanishing twin at 8 weeks. Baby B still going strong - due 2/8/20!