Really DH??! So annoyed

Re: Really DH??! So annoyed

• basdenjn6 member

  December 2015

  I hear ya! Love DH to death but every time he does something for the baby - feeds him, changes him etc. he expects 100 compliments and praise. Um, okay, good job- you took care of him for an hour. Do that for the next two months and we'lol call it even!

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• KristynLee15 member

  December 2015

  Seriously! I think in this case he was more embarassed he couldnt calm her quick. And i felt bad. But dont get mad at me!

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• Cmoniga member

  December 2015

  Ugh... I've got to be honest- I'm a little jealous your DH even offered to take her! Using your vent for mine haha... I'm not a violent person at all but seriously my DH makes me want to slap him silly. I knew having a child would be very new for him and he'd have a lot to learn, but I seriously never imagined how selfish of a person he was until now. As I sit here and type this I am listening to him snoring away. I've woke him 3 times in the last half hour politely asking if he could just sit on the couch with Our LO so I could take a shower for the first time in three days bc I need to go into work in two hours to drop off donations (still on maternity leave). Sure enough he is still passed out. He went to bed at around 11 so he's had a solid 8 hours.
  
  Last night I asked him if he would change her diaper so I could use the bathroom before feeding her- he flat out refused. Said he was "too tired" from a "long day" at work (he's a sales rep"...).
  
  I'm so worried about going back to work next month- he has nooooo clue what it's like to care for her full time and I'm really worried about my LO having to spend two full days a week with such a selfish man. He hasn't learned how to soothe her (similar to what you experienced) and always just says "she's starving" and insists he should feed her (he calls or texts if I leave to run an errand usually within 1 hour, he's never spent more than 2 hours alone with her and during those 2 hours has ALWAYS called or texted bc she was hysterical and he didn't know what to do).
  
  Sorry for the vent... Needed to get it out and felt like your vent helped lead the way! Lol

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• kmama37 member

  December 2015

  My so is this person but we really talked about it and he said me trying to instruct him and always taking the baby back doesn't allow him to figure it out on his own if he's offering to take the baby then just let him and he will figure it out or hand the baby back. He doesn't spend as much time with her cant expect him to be pro. And as for the sleep
  thing my so works and I do not. He sleeps a lot more than I do, but he works hard remember that even though your tired he may very well be too. Sir him down and talk to him and try showering during an hour he is awake to start with so you won't have to battle the sleep.

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• jasmineluke member

  December 2015

  I don't understand
  This baby is equally theirs as it is yours and thus responsibility is dual and equal. I'm sorry, I just have to say that is not fair to assume just because he goes to work that he must be tired as well and it's the moms job to deal with all this ....
  Listen, they drink coffee when they want to, they have lunch, they chat with fellow coworkers ... And you know what - it's all without a baby screaming in the background. so yes they go to work but I gauruntee that not a single one could handle baby by themselves for the entire day like we do - lets alone do laundry, cook, and clean.
  So no - I don't feel bad and yes - they need to come home and help out ... Even if they are tired because this child is just as much theirs as ours.
  Advocate for your own sanity and personal time and advocate for your LO because DH's need to learn how to soothe them when you are not there.
  Sorry for the rant and tough love but I have been reading too many of these posts and it bothers me ... DH has a major role to play ... Play that part!
  Rant over. Lol

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• melalinga member

  December 2015

  Gee i feel extremely lucky! My partner takes baby regularly.
  He watches him so i can go ride my horse for 'me' time, helps with dinner, takes him while i shower, takes him for walks, gives bottles, bathes etc.
  He doesn't even need to be asked...shouldn't have to. .

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• mommav83 member

  December 2015

  Ok ladies I'm sorry but seriously did your DHs think this was just a pump and run situation? My DH and I discussed our expectations before we decided to have a baby. Currently DH is in the middle of his Masters, works full time, and has an internship. When he comes home he will take DD so I can get a few personal things done that I can't do with her in my arms. If he's up doing homework then she's down there in her chair with him so I can get some sleep. My house isn't perfect but the kids are happy, I'm happy, and he's happy. Money might be tight but we wouldn't have it any other way. Maybe you need to sit your husbands down and tell them to pull up their big girl panties and start being an active participant in their lo's development bc later is to late. Vent over.

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• Dawnmarie0310 member

  December 2015 edited December 2015

  removed for TOU violation
  

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