I want to celebrate our baby even though it's early. I'm telling only a few very close friends and my parents. For everyone else I'm waiting for the last week of the first trimester
I called my parents today to let them know; I felt weird posting anything on The Bump before I'd even told my mom. But we won't be telling anyone else until at least the first Dr. appointment.
Nobody but DH. Well, and technically the doctor as I called to make my first appointment this morning. We haven't decided when to tell everyone yet... this will be a BIG surprise, and with DH's family, once one of them knows.... everyone will know within an hour.
Nobody. We will likely tell our parents on Chistmas when we will be almost 8 weeks (provided we have a good u/s earlier that week). They will be sworn to secrecy and we will not tell others until 13 weeks.
Ok I am so glad to see we aren't the only ones waiting to tell the families. I just don't really feel ready to share and they would spread the news like wildfire. I would really like to tell just my brother/SIL but my mom would get mega hurt feelings if she ever found out we told them first.
DH told his best friend who shared with his wife (I'm friends with her as well so I was fine with this) and I told two of my really close friends from work who knew we were TTC. DH was trying to talk me into telling my family today but I don't think I'm ready. His mother's birthday is right before Christmas and she recently moved so we want to do something fun to tell her. I think Christmas is a great time to tell the rest of our families but not the general public until end of January.
Not telling anyone except for my three best friends until the second trimester. With each of my prior pregnancies, we told MIL around 6-8 weeks and asked her to keep it quiet until we gave her the go ahead and she blabbed and told everyone she knew. My second was a loss, so that was fun for me.
I'm only telling my three best friends because their support was amazing when I suffered my loss. I can't imagine having to go through that without them.
I told my best friend, and we are telling MIL tomorrow since we are visiting her for Thanksgiving (I'll be 5 weeks). I am really hoping she can keep the secret, because we are waiting to tell my family at Christmas so we can tell them all in person, and the rest of the world in January.
me 30; DH 35 TTC since May 2014. Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d. Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1). AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW. Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Short LP (8 days). Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
I just told my DH. Like hours ago. I'm telling my best friend soon only because she's 8 weeks pregnant (she just told me last weekend) and the fact that we're so close is amazing and I can't wait to see her reaction. I'm thinking of telling our family at Christmas as long as I can get an appointment in before that to make sure all is well but I'm still undecided there.
TTC History:
Started dating DH 2006 . Married 2015
TTC July 2015-November 2015
BFP November 2015 Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021 MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
We told our parents today when we saw them for Thanksgiving. Will probably tell the rest of the family and close friends around Christmas after my first doctor's appointment. Everyone else after the first trimester.
DH told his cousin who is like his brother. He lives overseas so I'm not too worried. If my light hpts don't turn bad, I will tell my best friend next week. DHs cousin and my bff are the only ones who even knew we were trying. Everyone else thinks we're done having kids, so I'd like to wait til Christmas to tell the family and 2nd tri to tell the world.
My 3 closest friends know, my mom, my in-laws, and hubby's best friend (hubby of one of my close friends & they're expecting in June!). So in total - 7 people. I know a lot can happen in the 1st trimester, so we're keeping it to this close circle of friends & family until after the first trimester.
I told my DH first. Next, I told my best friend because she's been a mentor through this whole process (has been there before me and is a physician). Then I told my mom and sister. I'm going to tell my in-laws and dad this weekend provided my second beta is good. I'm going to tell extended family (close aunts and such) in January when I see them (they live across the country). Everyone else, early second trimester!
My DH and my mom are the only ones that know. In a couple of weeks I will tell my best friends because they have been supportive in my 2 previous losses. But that will be it until I get past the first trimester.
Just my DH. Thinking of telling my parents around Christmas. I'll still only be about 6 weeks but it might be weird not to tell them. It's the only time I see my dad and he doesn't skype so it seems appropriate to tell him then even if it's early. Will probably tell my best friend before the holidays. I'm close with her family and she told them last time since she was really excited so I'm waiting a little bit longer this time.
My DH and best friend. Planning to tell the in-laws at Christmas. Everyone else, if I'm not showing too much will be at a family get together in February. Work might be at the end of January or beginning of February as long as I'm not too sick or having any symptoms to out me.
Just my DH. Thinking of telling my parents around Christmas. I'll still only be about 6 weeks but it might be weird not to tell them. It's the only time I see my dad and he doesn't skype so it seems appropriate to tell him then even if it's early. Will probably tell my best friend before the holidays. I'm close with her family and she told them last time since she was really excited so I'm waiting a little bit longer this time.
I'm confused about your dates. If you are going to be 6 weeks at Christmas you'd only be 2 weeks now, which would mean you aren't even pregnant yet.
me 30; DH 35 TTC since May 2014. Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d. Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1). AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW. Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Short LP (8 days). Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
Just my DH. Thinking of telling my parents around Christmas. I'll still only be about 6 weeks but it might be weird not to tell them. It's the only time I see my dad and he doesn't skype so it seems appropriate to tell him then even if it's early. Will probably tell my best friend before the holidays. I'm close with her family and she told them last time since she was really excited so I'm waiting a little bit longer this time.
I'm confused about your dates. If you are going to be 6 weeks at Christmas you'd only be 2 weeks now, which would mean you aren't even pregnant yet.
Her due date is the day after mine...She would be 3w3d today and 7 weeks at Christmas. She probably miscounted to Christmas.
Just my DH. Thinking of telling my parents around Christmas. I'll still only be about 6 weeks but it might be weird not to tell them. It's the only time I see my dad and he doesn't skype so it seems appropriate to tell him then even if it's early. Will probably tell my best friend before the holidays. I'm close with her family and she told them last time since she was really excited so I'm waiting a little bit longer this time.
I'm confused about your dates. If you are going to be 6 weeks at Christmas you'd only be 2 weeks now, which would mean you aren't even pregnant yet.
Her due date is the day after mine...She would be 3w3d today and 7 weeks at Christmas. She probably miscounted to Christmas.
Yep you're right the due date calculator told me 6 weeks the week of the 16th so I have that in my head for Christmas time. I'm 10 DPO today so 7 weeks at Christmas. Still feels early to share the news since I likely won't have visited the doctor yet until after the holidays.
Apparently I need to find a calculator that has all the weeks listed for future planning with my mad math skillz....
Just my DH. Thinking of telling my parents around Christmas. I'll still only be about 6 weeks but it might be weird not to tell them. It's the only time I see my dad and he doesn't skype so it seems appropriate to tell him then even if it's early. Will probably tell my best friend before the holidays. I'm close with her family and she told them last time since she was really excited so I'm waiting a little bit longer this time.
I'm confused about your dates. If you are going to be 6 weeks at Christmas you'd only be 2 weeks now, which would mean you aren't even pregnant yet.
Her due date is the day after mine...She would be 3w3d today and 7 weeks at Christmas. She probably miscounted to Christmas.
Yep you're right the due date calculator told me 6 weeks the week of the 16th so I have that in my head for Christmas time. I'm 10 DPO today so 7 weeks at Christmas. Still feels early to share the news since I likely won't have visited the doctor yet until after the holidays.
Apparently I need to find a calculator that has all the weeks listed for future planning with my mad math skillz....
No problem... FWIW I plan on telling family at Christmas and once they've all be told, we will announce on FB. I still get sad when I see my old announcement pictures that I never got to share from the last two. Plus 7 weeks would be further than my last so I would feel better about sharing. It's really up to you though when you share. I know I want the support instead of suffering in silence.
That makes sense @ramoseecology ! Learning to think in weeks is definitely new for me too!
I agree with @mrsgillham14 - we already told MIL since we were visiting her for Thanksgiving, and will tell my family at Christmas when they are all together. I'm 5+1 and will be 9 weeks Christmas day. The last time I was pregnant, we told my family and some close friends. It was helpful to have some support after that loss. Tell whoever you want to tell - and especially tell the people who you know will support you no matter what happens!
me 30; DH 35 TTC since May 2014. Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d. Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1). AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW. Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Short LP (8 days). Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
With my first, we kept our lips sealed until 12 weeks.
I'm feeling a little more loosey goosey with this one and have already told all my closest friends. They were asking anyway, since they knew we were TTC.
A handful of close friends. My sister. My parents. My husband (obviously). We won't tell the in laws for a few weeks just to make sure and no one else unless they figure it out on their own. Friends who know me well, will probably figure it out quickly. I generally don't pass up on a glass of wine or two when hanging out. :P
I'm 4w2d, and I just told my entire family (brothers and SILs, sister, and parents) last night. Everyone was still in town for Thanksgiving, and we had a game night. My DH originally didn't want to tell anyone until at least Christmas except our parents, but he pulled me aside saying I could tell everyone since we have no idea when everyone would be back in town and all together again. Because our camera has a function that takes 3 pictures in a row, I tried to do the whole, tell everyone right before a picture gig to get their reactions in a picture. Everyone was so shocked that no one reacted until after all the photos were taken haha. Oh well... it was still great!
I told them we still had one more surprise coming: how many. I had 2-3 or 3-4 (can't remember which one shockingly; will ask my dr on Monday) eggs expected to release with my last treatment round, so that's kinda exciting that we get to surprise them twice!
We, unfortunately, won't be able to travel to DH's parents for Christmas,so we're going to try to see them sometime beforehand. We'll tell them then and the rest of his siblings on Christmas through their Christmas gifts.
Married to DH 10/6/12
TTC since 5/14
Unexplained with (controlled) hypothyroidism and suspected ovulatory dysfunction (but, I do ovulate on my own)
Clomid 50 mg 3/15 (unmonitored) - BFN
Clomid 50 mg + metformin 4/15 (unmonitored) - BFN
First RE appt. 5/15; Natural cycle 5/15 monitored with 2 mature follicles and Pregnyl Trigger (full dose) + prometrium - BFN
6/15 HSG - clear tubes & normal uterus; great PCT test results
TI - 100 mg Clomid + prometrium (AM & PM) + vaginal estrace (AM & PM) 6-7/15 (monitored) --> no additional response and thinned lining - BFN
TI - Injectables (follistim + Gonal-F, Ganirelix, & 1/2 dose Pregnyl) + prometrium (AM & PM) 9/15 --> 3-7 mature follicles (3 definites and 4+ that could have matured due to trigger) @ O -->BFN + 5 large cysts
We haven't told anyone yet, but plan to tell our parents on Christmas. Our DD is going to open up a big sister shirt. We'll wait until January or February before we tell the rest of our friends.
I would have liked to have told our parents on Thanksgiving, but I didn't get my BFP until two days later.
I have a really hard time with secrets. I know I should wait until 13 weeks, but it is a struggle for me. I've already told my best friend (who is about 17 weeks pg herself) and a work friend. We will wait until Christmas eve to tell our parents, since that is when we see them next. We then just plan on telling people when it is convenient (when family just happens to be together or if alcohol is involved and ppl ask why I'm not drinking.)
I don't know that there's any official "should" about waiting until 13 weeks. In a lot of my loss groups, we talk about how the societal norm of waiting until the 2nd tri to tell people is tied to our society's norms about silencing pregnancy loss. I think if you want to wait because you enjoy sharing a special secret between you and your H (and whoever you invite into your small circle), that's great. If you don't enjoy secrets and you're doing it because you "should" than don't.
So I broke down and told my brother and SIL. I was extremely nervous because my SIL just suffered an ectopic loss in August, and while I knew they would be happy for us, I really didn't want to make them sad. Well, she immediately started sobbing when I told them, and ran over to hug me and she said "I'm so happy!" Like ten times so it went way better than I expected. Then my brother and little nephew joined us and they all hugged me.
Somehow it has snowballed into my best friend, my family, my ILs, our entire extended families, and my dad's work and MIL's work. Ugh. I know they are all excited but I wish we could have kept it a little more quiet until at least my first ultrasound.
right now only 4 people know. 3 of my best friends and my H's best friend. nobody else will find out until the 2nd tri. our families both have loud mouths and with my son my MIL and FIL told everyone and after 2 years of trying I was terrified of miscarrying and then people expecting us to get pregnant right away which I knew wouldn't happen.
***loss mentioned*** We aren't telling anyone! We made the mistake last time and then had to re-inform everyone that we were losing it. It was not cool! We are also going to wait until Christmas to tell my Mom. I was thinking about one of her gifts being a onesie saying "I love my nana" or something along those lines. Or maybe an ultrasound pic.
Me:23 DH:32 Married 5/14/13 TTC #1 since 5/14 TTC #1 w/ treatments since 5/15 BFN 7/15 BFP 8/15-MMC 9/15 BFP 10/15- Diagnosed BO 12/15 BFP 2/16-EDD 11/18/2016
I've only told my husband and one close friend. I really want to surprise our parents and family, but dont plan to let them in on the secret until Christmas or later.
I obviously told my hubby the day I found out, and I told my two best friends. We will tell our parents and kids on Christmas day assuming my appt and u/s look good on the 23!
Re: Who have you told?
DS1 - 7/2011, DD 12/2012, DS2 - 4/2014, MMC - 12/2015
Baby #1: Aug. 2016
Baby #2: April 1st, 2018
LFAF April Siggy: TV/Movie BFFs
BFP #4 1/2016, DD born 10/2016
TTC since May 2014.
Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR.
RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Short LP (8 days).
Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
Summer 2016 LFAF awards:
Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:
TTC July 2015-November 2015
Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021
MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
TTC Since March 2022
MMC June 2022
BFP September 2022 - Due June 2023!
BFP #2 09/03/17 | EDD 05/17/2018
TTC since May 2014.
Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR.
RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Short LP (8 days).
Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
Summer 2016 LFAF awards:
Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:
Yep you're right the due date calculator told me 6 weeks the week of the 16th so I have that in my head for Christmas time. I'm 10 DPO today so 7 weeks at Christmas. Still feels early to share the news since I likely won't have visited the doctor yet until after the holidays.
Apparently I need to find a calculator that has all the weeks listed for future planning with my mad math skillz....
I agree with @mrsgillham14 - we already told MIL since we were visiting her for Thanksgiving, and will tell my family at Christmas when they are all together. I'm 5+1 and will be 9 weeks Christmas day. The last time I was pregnant, we told my family and some close friends. It was helpful to have some support after that loss. Tell whoever you want to tell - and especially tell the people who you know will support you no matter what happens!
TTC since May 2014.
Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR.
RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Short LP (8 days).
Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
Summer 2016 LFAF awards:
Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:
With my first, we kept our lips sealed until 12 weeks.
I'm feeling a little more loosey goosey with this one and have already told all my closest friends. They were asking anyway, since they knew we were TTC.
I told them we still had one more surprise coming: how many. I had 2-3 or 3-4 (can't remember which one shockingly; will ask my dr on Monday) eggs expected to release with my last treatment round, so that's kinda exciting that we get to surprise them twice!
We, unfortunately, won't be able to travel to DH's parents for Christmas,so we're going to try to see them sometime beforehand. We'll tell them then and the rest of his siblings on Christmas through their Christmas gifts.
I would have liked to have told our parents on Thanksgiving, but I didn't get my BFP until two days later.
I have a really hard time with secrets. I know I should wait until 13 weeks, but it is a struggle for me. I've already told my best friend (who is about 17 weeks pg herself) and a work friend. We will wait until Christmas eve to tell our parents, since that is when we see them next. We then just plan on telling people when it is convenient (when family just happens to be together or if alcohol is involved and ppl ask why I'm not drinking.)
I don't know that there's any official "should" about waiting until 13 weeks. In a lot of my loss groups, we talk about how the societal norm of waiting until the 2nd tri to tell people is tied to our society's norms about silencing pregnancy loss. I think if you want to wait because you enjoy sharing a special secret between you and your H (and whoever you invite into your small circle), that's great. If you don't enjoy secrets and you're doing it because you "should" than don't.
DS1 - 7/2011, DD 12/2012, DS2 - 4/2014, MMC - 12/2015
Thanks @Xanth! I love that advice.
So sorry about your loss!
So I broke down and told my brother and SIL. I was extremely nervous because my SIL just suffered an ectopic loss in August, and while I knew they would be happy for us, I really didn't want to make them sad. Well, she immediately started sobbing when I told them, and ran over to hug me and she said "I'm so happy!" Like ten times so it went way better than I expected. Then my brother and little nephew joined us and they all hugged me.
The Rowdy Roberts
We aren't telling anyone! We made the mistake last time and then had to re-inform everyone that we were losing it. It was not cool! We are also going to wait until Christmas to tell my Mom. I was thinking about one of her gifts being a onesie saying "I love my nana" or something along those lines. Or maybe an ultrasound pic.
Married 5/14/13
TTC #1 since 5/14
TTC #1 w/ treatments since 5/15
BFN 7/15
BFP 8/15-MMC 9/15
BFP 10/15- Diagnosed BO 12/15
BFP 2/16-EDD 11/18/2016