Need encouragement — The Bump

Need encouragement

10 Comments First Anniversary 5 Love Its Photogenic
edited November 2015 in Breastfeeding
I'm having a hard time mentally and emotionally with breastfeeding. I feel guilty for not liking it when so many struggle with latch and production and I don't. My only minor hardship physically is relying on a nipple shield.

I just feel like I'm feeding him all the time and for long periods of time. I've spent hour at a time doing it. My baby is five weeks. Will it get better soon as he gets older?

I struggled with baby blues the first two weeks and still have anxiety and have hard time not getting upset when he does. Maybe it comes with being a ftm. I feel like I don't know what I'm doing.

Can anyone commiserate? Any advice is appreciated? It helps to write this and vent even.

Re: Need encouragement

  • I am a ftm mom myself, and at 26 years old, I can honestly say that breastfeeding has been my biggest accomplishment of my entire life thus far. It might not be a big deal to others but making sure that you see it as an importance will help tremendously. And even more important is making sure those around you see it. Having friends and family who support you and want to help you with your goal will lift some of the struggle for sure. Breastfeeding is not easy, and admitting it doesn't make us weak, it only makes us stronger as mothers because we can endure despite it being difficult.

    Luckily, my fiance, baby and I lived with my family when I started breastfeeding. Everyone knew my wish and agreed to help me fufil it. This meant handing off my son to someone whenever momma was running on 2hrs of sleep. I needed to sleep so my body could make more milk. This meant having a family member do chores for me because I was busy nursing my son all day due to a growth spurt.

    Regardless, doing whatever it takes for our children is what being a mom is about. I used a nipple shield for 4 months until my son weaned off it on his own. Do not be ashamed you have to use one and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

    I know the frustration of holding my son and not knowing what's wrong as he cries and cries. Every mom has been through it, but it's a learning experience. Every baby is different and you will soon figure out what your baby likes and how they like to be soothes. "You are doing fine, baby's don't come with manuals", my sister in law repeatedly tells me.

    Hope some of this helped.
  • Yes, it does get better! We're down to 10 minutes a feed at 6 months. However, I still have those same feelings. Breastfeeding has been the biggest drain on my time and energy since he was born. I hope to stick it out to 9 months with giving him mostly breastmilk (along with solids) and wean entirely around 12 months.  I've met my goal of getting him this far, despite having to pump at work, so sometimes I take a minute to pat myself on the back. I recommend doing the same. Five weeks is a big achievement too, and those early weeks are the toughest. Great job, mom!
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  • I hit my rough point between 5-6 weeks. I think it's the time moms have the hang of things but absolutely run out of stamina and baby hits a growth spurt. By 6 weeks I was formula supplementing because I knew I could never keep up with EBFing when I returned to work. I had no time to create a freezer supply because LO was eating every 90min to 2 hours and spending about 45min each feeding. I am a RN and in a 12hr shift i take 2 pump breaks and that is all I have time for. It is really hard work and no one can give you a break from feeding the baby. I was getting very frustrated because I love to work out, I want my body back and I would feed LO, change, pop in workout dvd and get through the warm up before DH interrupted with baby saying he's hungry again! Personally I am happy with formula supplementing, my baby is still mostly on breastmilk but the pressure is off, he's 13 weeks and we are still going strong. If you want to stay exclusive just know that baby will get more efficient and be able to go longer between feedings soon. And don't feel guilty, not everyone feels that whole bonding experience, for a lot of us it is just about better nutrition and immunities.
  • I can totally commiserate, but I can't offer advise. I'm in the same place you are. My three week old must be going through a growth spurt because he will feed for hours! Sometimes after a 45 minute feeding he'll be hungry 15 minutes later. It's been frustrating. I felt a little better today after talking to the Mom of a 7 month old. She said around 3 months he will get good at nursing and it will get easier.
  • It gets way easier. You are doing so great!! Stick with it. I'm a ftm too. LO is 5 months old, and nursing is quick and easier now. Those first few weeks are the hardest. It felt like all I did was nurse and sleep, but I'm so glad I stuck with it. Just focus on you and baby and breastfeeding and let the other things go. That was the hardest part for me.
  • Don't give up! I totally understand where you are coming from. 6 weeks now, ftm and I really relate. I barely get out of the house for a while. But now, i think we are starting to hit our stride. I pump whenever I can (not too much as I have an oversupply problem) and leave lo enough to run an errand or walk. Nighttime feedings are a little easier...

    I've wanted to quit so many times especially since my lo has been having really bad gas, green mucuosy poo etc. I cried bc I felt like I was literally making him sick. Cut out dairy gluten and soy.

    What's helped was having support. my dr and Dh have been so supportive in making me feel like I'm doing the right thing. The ladies on the bump are great source of support for me too.

    Keep with it as long as you can! It will get better :) I think I am starting to see the light!!
    Me: 34 DH:38
    DS: 18 months   <3
    Dx DOR AMH .2
    <a href="" title="Pregnancy"><img 
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