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May 2016 Moms
kbrands7
member
Spider as big as a quarter and other random fears
kbrands7
member
Today, when I got to my car to drive home from work, the biggest jumping spider I have ever seen was perched on my driver-side dashboard, staring at me with all of its eyes. I swear this thing winked at me and pointed as if to say, "I've been waiting all afternoon for you. You're my afterschool snack."
Normally when I encounter spiders, I try to put on a brave, calm face so that I don't pass this fear don't to DS. We say hi to the spider, and invite him to go outside. If that doesn't work, we bam him. I've actually killed a spider with my bare hand for this kid so that he won't become the squirmy, crying mess I was pre-motherhood. DS usually says, " Go or bam!" when he sees them inside now. We ignore them outside, or say hello.
Well, today, this mutant spider wouldn't go or be squished because jumpers are damn fast. DS wasn't with me so I crumbled like used tin foil and called DH, crying, for help. I actually considered calling AAA to just tow my car home...that's how much I didn't think I could drive with this spider staring me down.
DH reminded me, repeatedly that a car crash would hurt more than a spider bite, so I drove the 45 minutes home. (Eta: The conversation initially went like this: Me sobbing, "I have a huge problem that you'll think is funny." Pause. "Spider?" "Yes. I don't think I can come home." "Sorry, you have to.")
Anyone else have to face a small fear lately or have a fear they don't want to accidentally teach their little one(s)?
Normally when I encounter spiders, I try to put on a brave, calm face so that I don't pass this fear don't to DS. We say hi to the spider, and invite him to go outside. If that doesn't work, we bam him. I've actually killed a spider with my bare hand for this kid so that he won't become the squirmy, crying mess I was pre-motherhood. DS usually says, " Go or bam!" when he sees them inside now. We ignore them outside, or say hello.
Well, today, this mutant spider wouldn't go or be squished because jumpers are damn fast. DS wasn't with me so I crumbled like used tin foil and called DH, crying, for help. I actually considered calling AAA to just tow my car home...that's how much I didn't think I could drive with this spider staring me down.
DH reminded me, repeatedly that a car crash would hurt more than a spider bite, so I drove the 45 minutes home. (Eta: The conversation initially went like this: Me sobbing, "I have a huge problem that you'll think is funny." Pause. "Spider?" "Yes. I don't think I can come home." "Sorry, you have to.")
Anyone else have to face a small fear lately or have a fear they don't want to accidentally teach their little one(s)?
Re: Spider as big as a quarter and other random fears
I am deathly afraid of snakes. Like, I start shaking and crying. Its really bad, and seems to get worse as I get older.
Once in Trader Joes, I got to the register, and look over to the register next to me and some like 7 year old girl have a snake draped around her neck. I ran out of the store sooooo quick and was hyperventilating. Even if I see one on tv, I freak out. I am convinced that one will be in the toilet when I go, and if I am in the bathroom for a while, I have to check to make sure nothing slithered in.
I just know my kid is going to be obsessed with them and will want to bring them home as pets. I can feel it. In this case, I want to instill the fear in them so they don't ask for a python as a pet! I wont even be able to take my kids into the reptile house at the zoo, that's how bad I am.
Birds: I appreciate that they're mystical magical with the power of flight and everything but their beaks and weird red stuff really gross me out not to mention their effing talons. They're basically dinosaurs people. It drives me crazy that people in NYC feed pigeons, they're disease ridden. You don't see anyone spreading out crumbs for the rats but it's essentially the same thing. It is a totally embarrassing fear because at least once a day I duck and cover in fear as a low flying pigeon enters my sphere. I don't want to pass this on to my LO because pigeons are a fact of life where we live but it is going to be tough.
Rubber Bands: I know this one is weird but I freak out if I touch a rubber band. I go out of my way not to and will never own them. No idea where it came from or what it's about. Honestly, I don't like to see other people touch them either or wear them on their wrist and it seriously bothers me to my core if I see someone use one as a hair tie. I'm a weirdo!
Married: 1/2008 ~ DD#1: 3/2012
TTC #2: Started 4/2014 BFP 7/30/15 MC 8/3/15 BFP 9/4/2015 EDD 5/16/2016
Spiders
Snakes
Sharks
One time there was a spider on my ceiling and I got a chair and a shoe and tried to gain the strength to kill it...I was up there for about an hour and my heart was racing. I couldn't do it so I slept on the couch. Idiotically, the spider was obviously gone in the morning so I slept on the couch for a week and figured after that point it probably made its way into my sister's room
Snakes are just self explanatory, eww.
As for sharks, I live by the ocean and will as long as my husband remains in the navy. I will not go in the water past my shins in fear of a shark. So silly, but screw that! We are moving to VA and you can probably imagine I'm super stoked to be so close to the Carolina waters where so many attacks happened this past summer.
Any wildlife I'm not around frequently I hope everyone leaves alone and they can live a cruelty free life BUT when they approach me they can go straight to hell as far as I'm concerned. I'm calm as I explain that the large birds in our backyard are turkey, the yipping and howling we hear at night is a pack of coyotes, the waddler on the road is an armadillo (thanks TX!), and the hissers are opossum. So far she's all wow and excited so I think I've hid my fear pretty well.
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
Also- Bats. They are disgusting! I used to love swimming at my grandmothers pool at dusk, until the bats...they would dive bomb us while we were swimming. Makes my skin crawl just thinking about it.
I bet you had a major heebie jeebies attack when those silly bands were popular. Additionally, I've got a major fear of spiders. LIke seriously. Hate em. If they come in this house they are as good as dead; unless of course the hubby is home and decides to rescue it.
First Pregnancy
Second Pregnancy
- BFP: 09/11/2015
- EDD: 05/25/2016
Baby Born04/15/2016
PGAL
I can see something is plugged out, but my DH always have to confirm that it is before I can leave the house.
Same with ovens, I can't sleep if he didn't check for me.
Dis af dis af dis af (it's off it's off it's off) is a very popular saying in our house :P
But, I remove all bugs from the house - so it's a fair trade
OK, so I have a reputation in my group of friends of "scatting" when I see a spider. No, not pooping my pants, but legit vocal scatting like I am about to drop a "so hot it's coooool" new jazz record. I burst out with "Boop be doop ba doo!" or something like that. So, we were all playing poker one night and this BAMF spider dropped right onto my hand. I jumped *on to the poker table* and sang out, "OBAMA LAMA LAMA!" Of course, no one could see the spider and it was totally out of the blue so everyone just assumed I had finally cracked. One even accused me of causing a scene because I had crappy cards. Only MH and BFF knew and they just fell over laughing. I would like to point out that NO ONE helped me. Jerks. Whenever I take a shower and am actually singing, MH gets all worked up thinking he needs to be on spider duty and has busted in on me in the shower more than once to defeat the imaginary spiders.
Other fears: the dark, snakes (I have another table jumping story about the time my cat brought a live snake into our dining room), clowns, elevators, stairs (see the problem here?), hang nails, windows, mice/rats, and crowds. Basically, I should just stay in my nice safe, one-story, *spider/snake free!* home with all the shades down, the lights on, wearing gloves, and reading a book *not about clowns* while sipping tea.