Miscarriage today - awful feelings — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Miscarriage today - awful feelings

My husband and I lost our first pregnancy today at 8 weeks. We somewhat expected it because we had a possibly abnormal ultrasound 3 weeks ago, but it was devastating news. On top of the loss, the 3 weeks of waiting to find out was agonizing. I'm having so many feelings today, but the one that I'm having the most trouble with is envy. 2 different facebook friends had beautiful healthy girls today around the same time that I was finding out about my lost baby. I'm so happy for the that their babies are healthy, but I can't even look at social media right now. It was hard for me to see all of the healthy pregnant women in the hospital this morning, too. Has anyone else felt like this?
Me: 29, DH: 31
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 <3
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19. 

Re: Miscarriage today - awful feelings

  • I am so sorry. I am going through my second miscarriage (no children) right now and I have been a mess. I know how you feel. I deleted facebook from my phone over the weekend because I just can't deal with it right now. I can still login from the computer to check my messages, but I just don't want to see it all the time. I have been at the hospital to do blood tests/see my doctor yesterday and today and seeing people with their new babies is awful (and then I feel worse for feeling that way!). I think a lot of us feel this way. I got pregnant again right after my first mc, but this time I have been told to wait a few months before we try again. The holidays are going to be really hard.
  • Yes!  Avoid Facebook and all other social media right now.  I just experienced my first loss two weeks ago, and I made the same mistake a few days ago to go on Facebook.  Three pregnancy announcements and a million pictures of healthy happy babies later, I wanted to scream and cry at the same time.  Your feelings make sense, so just control what you can.  I had a friend I hadn't seen in a while text me 3 days after our miscarriage telling that she is expecting her second child.  She is going to be due just around the time I would have been - a few weeks earlier.  It nearly destroyed me.  There are some things you can't avoid, like that text, but control what you can and don't go near it right now.  
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  • I am so sorry for all of your losses. That is totally normal, I have stopped myself from going through FB because it just hurts too much. My BFF was due a few weeks of my first EDD in Dec (this is my second mc) and she is probably 30 weeks give or take. I love her so much but seeing all of her milestones hurts me x2. We just need a little time away from other people's happiness, that's the honest truth.
    ******TW******Siggy warning
    BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d;
    BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks; 
    BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016 

       Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • @kns1988 I'm so sorry for your loss! I definitely know the feeling all to well. On top of feeling like every Facebook friend I have is announcing a pregnancy, I'm also a labor and delivery nurse so it's everywhere I turn at work! My friend just recently told us she's expecting and she's a week ahead of where I would be right now so it's definitely going to be hard. Just take it one day at a time and know that whatever you're feeling that day isn't wrong. We all have our own way of processing things. Best of luck to you!
  • I had to get off of FB AND instagram. I just couldn't stand to see another picture of a woman taking a selfie saying, "I'm taking this picture without makeup to be REAL about how HARD it is to be a MOTHER." And then the 10,000 comments thanking her for being so raw. 

    Don't get me wrong. I think you should post a million pictures and say whatever you want to. But right now, I can't sympathize with your particular struggle, make-up free selfie struggling mom lady. Ugh.  
    Due with rainbow rainbow rainbow baby on 9/29/17
    It's been a long road- Let's just say that! 
  • I'm so sorry for your loss .its so hard . All of the Halloween pictures with babies and announcements on Facebook with mini pumpkins and shit . It's a bad time to be on social media . There were like 3 pregnancy announcements yesterday on my newsfeed. Try and stay away - I also tell myself I don't know what they went through to get pregnant. Some days that helps some days it doesn't . I hope you start to heal soon . Hugs.
  • I am also going through my first miscarriage right now. 6w5d. This was my first pregnancy after IVF ICSI. The sadness I feel is something I have never felt before. I also cannot stand to look at Facebook right now. Our doctor said we can try again in February, we only have one embryo left for this round. I'm so scared to feel this pain again. You all are in my prayers.
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