Pregnancy is already embarrassing.

msuzannah · October 2015

So tonight I was sitting in a Luke warm bath for a little bit because morning sickness (all day sickness) has really started to kick in. I had been feeling a little bit gassy which has been the norm for the last little while and I thought "sure farting in the bath isn't a problem". Well little did I know it is!! DONT EVER TRUST A FART. I looked at my bath water and jumped out of the bath faster than I have ever moved in my entire life! Then my husband walks in the door because I'm sobbing and I just look at him and he starts hysterically laughing. According to him this is a pregnancy highlight. On the plus side of things my left boob itches so it must be a girl right? Or is that when your belly button itches?

BowWowBowie · October 2015

msuzannah said:

So tonight I was sitting in a Luke warm bath for a little bit because morning sickness (all day sickness) has really started to kick in. I had been feeling a little bit gassy which has been the norm for the last little while and I thought "sure farting in the bath isn't a problem". Well little did I know it is!! DONT EVER TRUST A FART. I looked at my bath water and jumped out of the bath faster than I have ever moved in my entire life! Then my husband walks in the door because I'm sobbing and I just look at him and he starts hysterically laughing. According to him this is a pregnancy highlight. On the plus side of things my left boob itches so it must be a girl right? Or is that when your belly button itches?

QFP

kalanieileen · October 2015

Are you saying you sharted?

msuzannah · October 2015

@BowWowBowie am I not aloud to make jokes? When I was going over all the newbie guides I must have missed that.

BowWowBowie · October 2015

QFP means "quote for posterity" I don't know if you took it as something else, because that's not what was intended in the least.

msuzannah · October 2015

@BowWowBowie I totally read something different... Don't worry no deleting for me

susykat77 · October 2015

This. is. AWESOME.

)

tripledaggerWed95976 · October 2015

Wait did u really shart in the tub or was that part of the joke? Either way, that makes me a sad panda-- especially since I just ate breakfast lol :-P

msuzannah · October 2015

I really did. It was probably one of most disgusting experiences of my life.

bprowess · October 2015

Oh wow...at least you were in the tub. Easy clean up...that is all that I will say on the matter to protect the innocent.

)

AdorkablePixie · October 2015

LOL! Thanks for the laugh.

goldie987 · October 2015

My decision to not trust my gas last night and to rush to the toilet just in case is looking better and better right now.

kyraaD · October 2015

hahah, that's awesome! thanks for sharing & giving us all a good laugh!

Bigboobsmcgee · October 2015

Wait until you shit on the doctor when you are delivering. OR your kid shits in the bath tub and it's everywhere, including on your kid and you have to scoop out what won't go down the drain

Ahh, good times!

Bigboobsmcgee · October 2015

And yes, you are definitely having a girl.

msuzannah · October 2015

@Bigboobsmcgee I am SO afraid of pooping on the doctor

kynbar5 · October 2015

@msuzannah if it's reassuring at all, it doesn't happen to everyone. I personally have delivered 5 babies and haven't had a bowel movement during labor.

Bigboobsmcgee · October 2015

kynbar5 said:

@msuzannah if it's reassuring at all, it doesn't happen to everyone. I personally have delivered 5 babies and haven't had a bowel movement during labor.

This is true!

I was SO afraid of pooping while delivering my first kid that the doctor had to tell me to stop holding back. My pushes weren't hard enough. With my second kid, she came so quick I didn't give a shit (hahaha) if I pooped or not and I know I did. There's no doubt I pooped all over the place. And peed, and had my water break at the same time. The more kids you have, the less you care.

goldie987 · October 2015

kynbar5 said:
@msuzannah if it's reassuring at all, it doesn't happen to everyone. I personally have delivered 5 babies and haven't had a bowel movement during labor.

Or so you think :P
I've heard doctors can be really great about making sure you don't know. I plan to apologize to the doc in advance and tell them don't tell me one way or another, I just don't want to know thank you very much.

sarahufl · October 2015

When I was about 8 weeks, we were staying on the 2nd floor of a hotel. H was giving me a hard time about taking the elevator instead of the stairs- I looked at him and said "I am literally on the verge of both crapping my pants and puking right now, stairs won't cut it"

I ended up in the bathroom puking into the ice bucket. It wasn't pretty.

kynbar5 · October 2015

Sgoldberg247 said:

kynbar5 said:
@msuzannah if it's reassuring at all, it doesn't happen to everyone. I personally have delivered 5 babies and haven't had a bowel movement during labor.

Or so you think :P
I've heard doctors can be really great about making sure you don't know. I plan to apologize to the doc in advance and tell them don't tell me one way or another, I just don't want to know thank you very much.

I've heard of this too but I've seen my labors each time (mirror) so I know all I've birthed are babies

DustyMelons · October 2015

msuzannah said:

@Bigboobsmcgee I am SO afraid of pooping on the doctor

Girl, I knew exactly the moment I pooped during labor. Trust me, you and no one else in the room cares at that moment. It's all good.

lalala2004 · October 2015

I'm rethinking every fart I consider letting out from this point forward.

msuzannah · October 2015

@lalala2004 seriously. Do it or might regret your entire day. @DustyMelons it didn't bother you at all? Was it embarrassing to poop in front of everyone? Do they at least move it away?

kynbar5 · October 2015

msuzannah said:
@lalala2004 seriously. Do it or might regret your entire day. @DustyMelons it didn't bother you at all? Was it embarrassing to poop in front of everyone? Do they at least move it away?

My exSIL did (I wasn't in the room but her and my brother told me) and from what I understand it goes into the bio bag they have under you. She said it was discusting and grossed my brother out so bad he threw up. They both said it stunk terribly.

Bigboobsmcgee · October 2015

msuzannah said:

@lalala2004 seriously. Do it or might regret your entire day. @DustyMelons it didn't bother you at all? Was it embarrassing to poop in front of everyone? Do they at least move it away?

They are SOOOO used to women pooping. They discreetly move it away and clean you up.

yogahh · October 2015

I have been so gassy, and all I can think about is this post. So while I am working or on the train the manta "don't fart, don't fart" keeps running through my head.

GinnyJ2012 · October 2015

This post cracked me up! I will be farting in the bathroom for a while!

As for pooping on the table, I know I did with DS1 and it was quickly cleaned and I really didn't care. one of the nurses covered it as I was pooping and then removed it without a word. With DS2 I did not. So even if you did with the first you won't necessarily with your others.

DustyMelons · October 2015

msuzannah said:

@lalala2004 seriously. Do it or might regret your entire day. @DustyMelons it didn't bother you at all? Was it embarrassing to poop in front of everyone? Do they at least move it away?

I think it was just a small amount with me. The nurse discreetly wiped it away and didn't even bat an eye.

I was in the middle of pushing (ha, obviously) when it happened so my mind was elsewhere. H decided to mention it to me afterwards, I think mainly to see if I had noticed it happening.

ETA- and no, I wasn't embarrassed. But- I kind of went into it with the mentality that it wouldn't be a big deal if it happened. There are all kinds of weird fluids coming out of you at that time anyway ;-)

FiancB · October 2015

You aren't the only one! I read a funny story a while back about a woman that accidentally pooped on the bedroom floor when she was pretty far along and didn't want to tell her husband but just couldn't get it cleaned up on her own. Yep, don't trust the fart.

I ended up having a similar experience a while back unrelated to pregnancy, told someone and it turned out that they had too, so we dubbed it Shart Week.

I'm a student and not even a nurse yet and I've already seen so much poop. I really wouldn't worry about anyone judging you for pooping during labor. No1curr.

AdorkablePixie · October 2015

I don't trust farts anymore either. I had diarrhea one day and later in the afternoon I sat down just to pee and ended up pooping too, with no effort. I usually won't fart now unless I'm on the toilet or I KNOW it's safe. lol

I am afraid of pooping while I am in labor too. That's one of the reasons I don't want DH down there. Not that he wants to be. lol He's told me he doesn't even want to be in the room, but now I think he's okay with being in the room but nowhere but near my head. I am okay with that.

sarahufl · October 2015

Bigboobsmcgee said:

msuzannah said:

@lalala2004 seriously. Do it or might regret your entire day. @DustyMelons it didn't bother you at all? Was it embarrassing to poop in front of everyone? Do they at least move it away?

They are SOOOO used to women pooping. They discreetly move it away and clean you up.

Yeah, anyone who works in L&D should be used to poop. I would sincerely hope they wouldn't mention it to you at all.

Knottie98913877 · October 2015

This is the best post I've read on here yet. "NEVER TRUST A FART!" I'm dying. Thank you for sharing.

MommaChrissie27 · November 2015

) Bless your heart- that is hilarious! Good on you for having a sense of humor about it!

MErskine · November 2015

OMG this was so good! I'm dying of laughter. At least I know I'm not the only one feeling a bit gassy!

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