Has anyone else been told baby showers are bad luck?

michelefiore · October 2015

I am so upset my mom told me she doesn't want to throw me a baby shower because they are bad luck. We are Italian and it has been said if you throw a baby shower something bad can happen to the baby. I was looking forward to having one. I think its a ridiculous superstition but I love my mom and don't want her to be upset. I am so confused! UGH! Every one has baby showers now a days! Anyone else have to deal with this?

PedsIsHardcore · October 2015

I'm Jewish and we usually don't have baby showers unless they are after the baby is born. I had mine at 35 weeks when pregnant with my DD only because we had people drive from states away to visit.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2015

I believe it's considered bad luck in the Jewish community as well. I've not had to deal with it, but hopefully a friend will step forward and offer to throw you one. In the meantime, go ahead and create a registry because you'll get a completion coupon. Infants really don't need much other than a place to sleep, something to eat, diapers, a car seat, and a few clothes. If you choose to wait until after baby is here, it won't be that big of a deal.

CharminglySouthern · October 2015

I have heard this from several different cultures/religions. My friends that are Jewish have baby showers after the baby is born, if at all. (So no, not everyone has baby showers now). That said, your mother is not the only one who can throw a baby shower, and if your friends offer, you will have to decide whether it's worth upsetting your mother.

michelefiore · October 2015

thank you guys I appreciate the advice! I think I would rather do it after and not upset my mom.

Parker16772 · October 2015

That's interesting. I had never heard that certain cultures/religions considered them to be bad luck.

desertheart · October 2015

I know Germans won't buy anything before the baby is born, as well.

But, it would be more things to worry about if had nothing on hand. In the US, you at least need a car seat to come home in. You should know how to use it properly, so that would mean buying it before hand. Like someone else said, maybe just buy the basics.

sarahufl · October 2015

The only people I know who think they are bad luck are Jewish. My BIL's grandma didn't attend any of my sister's showers because of that.

delujm0 · October 2015

I knew that in Jewish and Indian culture it is considered bad luck. But I'm also Italian on both sides, and no one in my family believes that it's bad luck...my mom and sister threw me a shower and no one said anything about it being bad luck, even the older ladies who are first generation Italian-American (grandmothers, great aunts, etc - they were all excited to come). So I find that a bit odd...I've never heard of this being taboo in the Italian community.

Jules08 · October 2015

Interesting! I come from a large Italian family and have not heard of this before.

You said that you wanted a shower, but understood your mom's feelings, so thank you for wearing big girl panties today! So many women would be all: "But I want a shower, I need a shower, someone has to throw me one." (Which is of course the complete opposite of how showers work.)

I think creating a registry is a great idea. Keep track of the things you've researched and decided you want to have on hand. If you don't end up having a shower, you'll still get the completion discount, so there's that. People can still search and if they find it and decide they want to send you a gift, they can use that as well.

As far as bad luck, this is just a coincidence; however, the past 3 women (myself being one) that have been thrown a shower here at work have all gone on bed rest the very next day for various reasons.

pettycrocker · October 2015

Yea... I am Italian, from a big Italian family, with lots of Italian friends, and have never heard this. I know Italians can be very superstitious people- I've heard of not mentioning anything of pregnancy until after the 2nd Trimester which is common in many ethnicities... I've heard of not buying anything for baby before the 2nd tri, which is also common in many ethnicities, but I have never heard of not celebrating a baby with a baby shower? Italians love to celebrate shit. Especially babies. So ... I think it is just your mom and her own personal issues.

pettycrocker · October 2015

Maybe one of your friends would like to host a shower for you?

ecwk · October 2015

I would traditionally have considered it that way and if I was still living in Ireland I would not have one. I'm in the Staes now where they are much more common and I'll most likely follow the 'When in Rome' philosophy.

YogaSandy · October 2015

Years ago my mother (not Jewish or Italian) told me it was bad luck to have one before the baby is born. In my area it is very typical to have showers after the baby is born. I think I have only ever been invited to one pre-birth. When I was pregnant, my mom and sister asked if I wanted it before or after. I said definitely after, but not because of luck. I was worried if the worst happened, I would have to come home to a house full of stuff.

We didn't buy anything until mid-late third trimester. Didn't set up furniture until late. And I had an agreement with my family - if anything happened, everything would be out of my house before I got home.

projectpanda · October 2015

I'm in Ireland and it is 'generally' considered bad luck to purchase anything for the baby before it is born - baby showers are not really a thing here....but obviously most people get the necessities themselves such as car seat, buggy etc. before bean arrives.

nackie · October 2015

My Italian grandmother considered them to be bad luck, but she was superstitious about a lot of things. The women in my generation are the first in our family to do showers, none of our mothers had them.

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