DH or partner staying home

katyschafer · October 2015

How long is everyone's partner or husband taking off work once the baby is here? I haven't seen this discussed yet and am curious what other people are doing or have done with other children.

maureenmce · October 2015

My husband is taking off 2 weeks to start, then I'll be on my own for a month, and then he'll take another week to give me a sanity break.

After that, it's just me until I go back to work about 6 months after baby is born! I wish he could take more time off, but we can't afford it and his job is too demanding to let him be gone for more than 2 weeks at a stretch, unfortunately.

I am honestly kind of concerned about it because two weeks seems like nothing, and I have very limited experience with babies, and none with newborns. Sigh. But I will figure it out! Because there is not a lot of choice!

ashs88 · October 2015

My husband actually works from home, but I keep reminding him that he needs to find out how much paternity leave he is allowed so he can actually be truly off for the first week or two. When DS was born DH was only working part time and doing freelance stuff (all from home) so we were actually able to keep DS home with him for the first 6 months. I wish that was possible this time, but he is working full time now and his schedule isn't nearly as flexible. I think a lot of workplaces allow for 2 weeks of paternity leave now. A coworker of mine just took 2 weeks when his son was born about a month ago. And my neighbor is actually a stay at home dad and his wife works full time. I think it is awesome that so many men are able to take time off and be more involved than they ever used to be!

Knottie1452445632 · October 2015

I'm not sure how much time my hubby can take off work - if any! He works in computing as a contractor so each day off would be a huge loss of earnings and a massive financial strain. TBH I'm very worried about the whole thing as we have 3 other children which I'll have to look after on top of having a newborn and all the mummy/housework stuff to do. In fact make that petrified. I am thinking I'll try and convince my parents to stay for a week or so though just so I can get used to it all before going it on my own! They live 2 & 1/2 hours away & even them staying will be a strain as we are in a tiny rented place with no where for them really to stay. But hey ho I guess we'll work something out - right?

ariasbabyblog · October 2015

DH stayed home for 2 weeks with our first and will likely stay for 2 weeks with this kiddo too. I will be a repeat c-section, so I will not be allowed to do any lifting or much moving for the first 2 weeks, which will sucky with a 2 yr old and a newborn. We had a sort of trial run when I had my gall bladder out a few weeks ago and the DS didn't like that mommy couldn't hold him or carry him around. He seemed to think I was mad at him. We'll have to figure something out. After the 2 weeks, the MILs will likely be taking turns staying for part of the day at least to help out until I'm fully recovered from the surgery.

nickilynn0516 · October 2015

I am not sure how much time he will get off. With baby 1, he went right back to work the day after he was born while we were still in the hospital. With this one, I know he will get some time but not sure how much. He literally works 5 minutes (if that) from our house so if I need him, he can come home ASAP. My parents also live about 5 minutes from us so we have them too.

RachelM82 · October 2015

Mine's taking 5 or 6 weeks. He's saved a ton of sick time and can take it in conjunction with FMLA so he'll get full pay. I'd like him to take 5 weeks so he can save a week of sick time in case he needs it later, but it will start accruing again once he goes back to work.

Rach8672 · October 2015

My husband will be lucky to have a week or two off

I'm pretty sure he hasn't even asked what he can have off. Nothing like last minute ! My parents will still be here so that should help

Monilee1017 · October 2015

DH will take off when I am in the hospital so he can stay there with me, I'm hoping for another Friday c-section. Once I am home for one week he will work 1/2 days in the office and 1/2 at home, because he can work from home but will also have meetings. My mom will be with me while DH is at work the second week. The third week DH will do 1/2 days again. My MIL was talking about coming over the fourth week, we will see as she just got a new job. After that I should be good to drive and do everything myself. DH works less than 10 minutes away and comes home for lunch almost everyday and plans to continue to do so. Also my brother and father are both teachers and will be home the third week if I need anything and my sister is a SAHM. This is from when we last talked about and to be honest things might change.

narissa2013 · October 2015

DH gets total of 12 weeks. He will take 4 when i deliver and then use 8 when i go back to work (at 12 weeks post-partum). That way we can delay daycare till 20 weeks. We're lucky as I know most workplaces dont give that much time to dads.

dksport03 · October 2015

Hubby will probably take 3 wks. I wish he could take more with this being my first pregnancy and having a 7 year old running around (stepson).

carlyhammond · October 2015

My SO is taking a week off.
From the time my water breaks until a week later. At least that's what he told me, well see exactly what happens when he sees baby

.
He's a cook at a small family restaurant in the town we live in- they genuinely don't let him get off work because he's the only one that can cook the food right- but SO says baby is more important and he's going to be with me regardless.

PedsIsHardcore · October 2015

My SO will be taking 2 days off. The day our kiddo is born and the day after. We are dependent upon his income since I have to go on maternity leave early due to me being high risk. I have to have surgery after delivery so he will end up needing to take more time off later.

Ebiejay · October 2015

My hubby gets 2 weeks paternity leave, and if we feel like he should be at home longer he has some leave saved up. But my mum will be coming to stay for a fortnight 2-3 weeks after my due date so we'll probably be fine.

@Mumtobe+4 Hugs! It does sound stressful but I'm sure you'll work something out. Does your DH work long hours? Hopefully he can at least share the load when he's not working. Make the most of offers from friends to help out with housework and cooking and even babysitting the older ones, and even if you decide not to plan on having parents come and stay, you could at least have them on 'standby' so if you feel overwhelmed they can come and help.

kmo8986 · October 2015

My husband will take a few days when the baby is born, but is saving most of his time for after I go back to work and then he is taking 6 weeks after I go back to get to the summer and then both kids will be home with me all summer and when she is about 6 months they will both go to in home daycare together. With our first he took a week, went back for a week while my mom was there, and then took another week the first week I was alone.

MissMheMhe · October 2015

DH will be using a week of paid leave and will be working extra hours from about november on to use as flex time. We're aiming for 2 to 3 weeks.

sarahbeara25 · October 2015

My Fiance is planning on taking a week off after baby comes. He will use some of his vacation time to do so. If it works out perfectly he could have up to 12 days off (he does shift work, so if baby comes on his first day off that would work out wonderfully lol)

mamakculb · October 2015

My due date is Jan 31, and with my DS I was induced on my due date. My DH is taking off the first week of February but can/will take off extra days if baby comes earlier. Probably two weeks max so we can have some vacation time later in the year. We have family close by so I can catch a sanity break here and there if I need to.

Theliops · October 2015

My husband will be taking off 2 or 3 weeks. He's saved up his vacation this year and has 2.5 weeks left. My twins will likely be born around Christmas and then he'll be able to take another week (or more if he wants) in January.

We've also got my mom and stepdad and husband's mom and dad on deck for helping once he goes back to work. So there might be some sort of shift system until I get the hang of two babies!

khf221979 · October 2015

DH doesn't get any leave so he is using his vacation time. He will be working half days and using vacation to cover the time he is not working for about 2 weeks. He will also be working from home so it won't be too bad. Originally he was going to just take a week off and stay home but he figured it would be better to be more available for me and the baby if he could stretch his time out for 2 weeks. His company used to offer leave for dads but they got rid of it which is not fair bc I think dads should be able to take time to bond with the baby as well b

jeanbug12 · October 2015

My husband gets better leave than me! He has to use his vacation time, but he can take up to 6 months off. He has been working there for a long time and accrues tons of time off. With our last 2 kids, he took a week or 2 after they were born, then after my 12 week leave, he took 6 months off. He is planning to do the same this time, but may work a day or 2 a week during his leave.

maureenmce · October 2015

Wow, @jeanbug12 that's awesome!

kristaleigh0525 · October 2015

DH is working part-time and is a graduate seminary student, so he'll luckily still be on Christmas break when our son is born! He works for our local church and they've pretty much given him free reign in terms of his schedule. If I deliver on time, he'll have about 2 weeks, if he comes early, we'll have him for longer!

holocene · October 2015

With my first, we could only take a week due to finances/scheduling. When our second was born, we were in a much better position and he took one month initially. He had to go back for two weeks, but then he took an additional 3 months off. It was amazing. This time, thanks to the oil market crash and him owning his own business, he will probably only be able to take a week off.

katyschafer · October 2015

This is so helpful. Thank you everyone for taking the time to respond!

karynste19 · October 2015

My husband will take two weeks when our baby is born. I will stay out for a full 12 weeks. When I go back, he will take his remaining 10 weeks of FMLA. We are very fortunate that he has so much vacation time saved to take the full unpaid leave. This post shows how incredibly difficult it is for men/partners to take time off.

erincjackson · October 2015

Dh will only take a few days. He only gets 2 weeks paid time off a year and I will not be going back to work, so his income is vital. It would be amazing if his employer offered some type of paternity leave.

yankeeinthesouth · October 2015

My DH is taking 2 or 3 weeks off. Then he will work from home a couple of days a week for a little while. We are lucky that he has the flexibility -- especially at the beginning of the year!

MollyA1011 · October 2015

Wow! I'm blown away! Lol my husband doesn't get any time off to be with me or the baby. Technically he could I suppose. He could use up his 2 weeks of vacation but honestly, I'd rather him save that for later in the year. He will basically have to call off when I go into labor and will be working when I go home. Good thing my mom is down the road!

mvhyde · October 2015

With DS, we were lucky and he came in the summer, when my husband (who teaches) had his summer vacation. This time around the baby is expected around the first week of classes. So basically there is no chance of him taking more than a day off (the day I go to the hospital and hopefully deliver). He gets sick days, but no other floating PTO, just the scheduled school vacations (summer, winter break and then days like thanksgiving and Fourth of July etc). It's great for holidays and allowing him to spend lots of time with family over the summer, not so great for when babies arrive.

We will basically be praying that the baby comes on Friday or Saturday so he has a day or two to recover before classes.

SisterSunshine · October 2015

Oh good grief, I hadn't thought about this. I'm probably having a c section as I am still completely previa at 26 weeks. If he doesn't work, we do not get paid. Im going to have to see if ANYONE will be available to help me.

essentialpeace · October 2015

3 days... @-)

JNGettinMarried · October 2015

For DD1, hubs took 4 weeks starting with delivery day in the hospital (scheduled c-section). Planning to take 6 weeks for DD2, who will also be a scheduled c-section.

MollyA1011 · October 2015

I just have to ask.... How do all of your husbands get 6 weeks off?! I'm envious! My husband is 26 and has been on the railroad since 19... He gets 2 weeks. Max time off he will EVER get will be 5 weeks and 2 personal days! The railroad has its perks but time off is obviously NOT one of them! I'm going to be the 9month pregnant wife standing outside his work with the blow up rat trying to rally these union workers to ask for more time off! Lol for heavens sake!

Knottie1452445632 · October 2015

Don't worry @SisterSunshine I'm in the same position (minus the placenta previa & c-section) and I think you are right i'm going to have to draft in friends and family until I feel more up to it. I'm going to get a cleaner and doh walker in to lighten the load too as we have 3 other children (cheaper than loss of earnings from hubby).

Good luck I'm sure you'll work something out. Xxx

babybluu · October 2015

The military allows 10 days so that's what he will take.

willashbaby · October 2015

DH's vacation time restarts in December, he has 3 weeks plus sick so he's planning on taking two (JIC c-section) and will go back earlier if all is OK.

jessielynn1 · October 2015

Hubby will be taking 6 weeks off initially after baby is born. He's using all his banked hours so he can save his vacation and PTO days for later in the year. It's going to be a huge adjustment adding a newborn to the mix with a 4 year old and a 13 month old so I'm thankful he can be there. I guess I'm lucky because my mother in law lives with us and she's a big help also.

Knottie82267345 · October 2015

My fiancé and I live with his grandmother, that I care for 24/7 and he works part time right now. It looks like he's going to try and take 2 weeks off before I deliver (to help me and his grandmother) and 4 weeks after my due date. Also my sister is coming down to stay with us 2 weeks before and 2 weeks after to help as well. And my grandmother will be staying with family close by for a couple months to help as well. I'm pretty lucky to be in the situation I'm in.

TurtleMeg · October 2015

My hubby gets 6 weeks. He hasn't decided if he will be splitting it...

katyschafer · October 2015

It must be so wonderful to be able to have DH home for an extended period. My DH is thinking he'll take a week. My sister is also coming to stay with us for a while after LO gets here, so I'll have support from her too. Thank you to everyone who took the time to respond.

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