Help with nighttime routine - takes way too long

paine0925 · October 2015

How long does it take each of you to feed, change, swaddle, and comfort/put down to sleep your LO in the middle of the night each time? My daughter is going to be five weeks on Monday and it takes us one hour and 15 minutes minimum every single feeding each night before I can get her to be back down and sleeping. This means I only have about an hour and 10 to 15 minutes before the next one starts because she's only going every 2 1/2 hours in between feedings. So I figured if I can shorten the time that she's up and doing the feedings that will give me longer time to sleep. But I cannot figure out how to make it go any quicker and was wondering how long it takes each of you? Our routine is this: when she starts making the noises or cries because she's hungry I get up amd immediately take her to the changing table and change her diaper. Then we sit down to feed on one boob and it usually takes About 15 minutes of her feeding and then I have to burp her which entails me putting her on her Boppy so that she can work out her gas and burps and we do that for at least 5 to 10 minutes so she can get all of the air out. Then I switch her to the other boob and we do it all over again. After the second time on the Boppy to get her air out we then re-swaddle her and I usually just hold her and rock her so she can relax so she can fall asleep again - this is the hard part because I see everyone says you need to do this for about 20 minutes before they fall asleep enough to leave them back down, so we do whatever works in that particular situation I may rock her or just hold her at the boob so she can feel the skin to skin contact and falls asleep or sometimes I even lay her back down in her bed and just stick my finger in her mouth and let her comfort sock until she falls asleep. This whole thing takes at least an hour and 15 minutes, does that seem ridiculously long to you guys or is that about the same for you? Any tips or tricks to make it go a little bit quicker? I've tried feeding her on just one boob and then laying her back down to sleep which she will do but then she will just wake up in 30 minutes or 45 minutes to eat on the other side, so I know she definitely needs to eat on both sides and for as long as possible because she will sleep longer that way even though in the short-term it makes it quicker for me, in the long term it means much less sleep and waking up much More often. Any insight is appreciated! Even if it's just to tell me that this is normal LOL!

bethanyjane26 · October 2015

I'm not breastfeeding so I'm no help, but Mine barely takes an hour. LO is 2 weeks old, I feed her half her bottle, change her diaper, feed her the rest of it, burp her and rub her back until she falls asleep then I put her back in her bed.
And she sleeps 3 hours after that.

mirizzi&A · October 2015

I'm BFing and my middle of the night routine takes about an hour from start to finish. It looks pretty much the same as yours except I reswaddle after changing his diaper, and I only spend about 3o seconds burping him between sides.

emmekaye · October 2015

I'm not sure if you opposed to this, but at night we usually give DS a bottle of breast milk that I pumped earlier in the day. Then I burp him, change him and swaddle him. Afterwards he's usually down. I think this usually takes about 45 minutes.

kanga915 · October 2015

I cheat. We don't swaddle (she hasnt liked it for several weeks). And we co sleep so I make sure she's in a dry diaper, get her jammies on and a sleep sack, then I nurse her to sleep in bed. She doesn't need to be burped, thankfully. Our method won't work for everyone or every baby but I'm getting plenty of sleep and we are all happy. Maybe you can work on weaning your LO off the swaddle so that's one less step. Can you burp LO on your shoulder while you rock her so she burps as she falls asleep? That might save some time too. Just ideas. Otherwise, just know this is temporary.

monicaP · October 2015

I am pretty much the same. I cut out diaper change during one feeding since other babies are sleeping 5-7 hours, I figure a wet diaper is ok if it isn't bothering her.

ElleMF728 · October 2015

I cheat as well, I only do a diaper change for his first wake since that is his longest sleep unless he poops which he never does.

He wakes, I change his diaper then I feed him a bottle while holding him comfortably in bed. LO usually falls asleep on his bottle and if he doesn't he falls asleep while I'm burping him. I sit him on my lap facing me and bounce him which knocks him out usually. Can you swaddle LO before she feeds so that you don't need to do that after?

I also give bottles of pumped milk at night because I find it easier and quicker. DH is working 12-13 hour shifts, 7 days a week right now and is sleeping in the basement since he has to wake at 3am. I have to do all the night stuff by myself and I'd be exhausted if I hadn't figured out how to work night time efficiently.

jbettles · October 2015

We do one bottle of formula a day and try to do it right before bed. About 9 or 10, hubby gives him 4 oz formula while I shower, then changes and swaddles him. Then I nurse to top him off - takes about 5-10 minutes and he's out. Then I pump to empty and start building a supply (and to mimic the missed feeding). My personal belief is that the formula is more filling, because baby boy will sleep from 11 pm until 6 or 7 the next morning. When he was smaller and still getting up at night, I would change and reswaddle first thing, then feed him til he popped off. He never ate more than 5-10 minutes and would sleep the rest of the night. Each baby is different, but I've never had to hold him 20 minutes so he would stay asleep - once he is out I just lay him down and he stays asleep 90% of the time. It's worth a try just to see what your baby's habits are - you might save a few minutes that way! Also, I turn the lamp on to feed but back off when I lay him down (he sleeps next to our bed). I really think I'm building an association of light on = eat, be awake and light off = sleep. No idea if he's capable of the association at this age, but it's working for me!

buckleyk · October 2015

You don't have to hold her for 20 minutes before putting her down. If you can lay her down sleepy (but not fully asleep) and she can fall asleep on her own, you'll be ahead of the game.

I usually re- swaddle dd and then lay her down sleepy and give a pacifier. I also try to keep the lights off and the room dark as possible and don't talk to her at all so she gets the idea it's nighttime and she needs to go back to sleep.

jwebbbber45678 · October 2015

I usually let baby breastfeed until he passes out on the boob. I'll notice that his eyes are closed and he's hardly sucking and I gently unlatch him. This means I get to skip the rocking him to sleep part. It sounds like we have similar babies, mine is up every two hours and then likes to stay up for an hour or two. One thing I've done to help get more sleep is bed sharing. I swore I would never do it but it helps us both sleep better. I have diapers and wipes right next to the bed. I basically do the whole nighttime routine in bed. There is always at least one point though where he won't comfort himself to sleep on the boob and needs to get rocked to sleep or even have a midnight bath to calm down. I think I've got a colicky baby on my hands, I'm hoping this phase passes quickly and I hope it does for you as well. Having a colicky baby is so hard! Hang in there!

paine0925 · October 2015

Thank you guys - I'm going to try a lot of these ideas!!!! So for those of you who give bottles of pumped milk in the middle of the night... Don't u then have to go pump!? To make up for the missed feedings? My boobs would burst and my supply would suffer if I didn't go pump when she would normally eat.

meggipi5 · October 2015

Like some PPers, I also do not do a diaper change. I don't even undo the swaddle (unless it's already in shambles). I have a night light I nurse by instead of the lamp. I burp for a few minutes in between sides and if she's too asleep to take the other side, no biggie. If she falls back asleep, the whole thing is usually 30-45 min. If she wants to be awake, add about an hour to that.

paine0925 · October 2015

Ugh I have to undo the swaddle because she falls asleep at the boob every 2 min otherwise - then the moment I put her down she cries or she will sleep but not for long and we are back up in 20 min so I've learned to make her eat by keeping her awake, unfortunately that means taking her swaddle off

Dot30324 · October 2015

Here's our system. Mine is 3w old as an FYI.

Wake
Leave in swaddle
Feed. (5-20 min. whatever it is it is!)
Change if needed
Burp 2-3 min plus rock 5 min max
Down.

According to my pediatrician and best friend nicu nurse whatever they eat in the night they eat. Don't push it. If it's 5 min then it's 5 min.

No lights only night light
Keep room dark!
Only unswaddle if you can smell the diaper!

AshleyMB86 · October 2015

We change him and reswaddle first, then feed while rocking until he passes out again. It takes anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours, it depends on him really. He lacks consistency lol.

ForeverEverAfter · October 2015

I BF, but it only takes about 20 min to feed one side, burp, back on that side, offer the other. Then I change her bum. If she's already dozing I just snuggle is back to bed (I bedshare after she wakes), otherwise I offer the second side and she falls asleep nursing. I'm generally up for a half hour, more if she can't burp-then she gets fussy and will be up for an hour.

thinkpink101 · October 2015

I hate nights. It's brutal! I have low supply and LO (7 weeks) is a lazy but voracious eater. First I nurse him which takes forever because he keeps falling asleep and I have slow flow. Say 1 hour. After this he's still hungry and I supplement with a bottle. This takes another 40 minutes or so (usually he will want about 6oz. Then I try to settle him so I can pump... All in all it takes 2+ hours each time, and that's if I'm lucky and he goes back to sleep. About half the time we're up for good at 3am. Then I have to get my older three boys up around 6am. I'm soooo tired!

ktcramer8 · October 2015

My routine is just under an hour if my husband helps, 1 1/2 hours on my own. We don't start a nighttime feeding until she's actually up, she's a super grunty sleeper and if I fed her at every stirring I'd be feeding ever 1-2 hrs. So she actually wakes (cries) between 4-5 hours.

I feed first boob, take a break at 10 min or so, burp, resume first boob. She often finishes that boob at 25-30min. Diaper change, offer second boob, never takes more than 5 min if she takes it at all.

Wake hubby during diaper change if he's not working the next day. Have him burp, reswaddle, rock and replace pacifier if she's flinging it. This is generally a 20-30 min commitment.

If he's around then I'm pumping b/c I'll still get a few oz when supply is best in middle of night, otherwise I pump after she dozes off.

Our girl is 3 weeks. Doesn't work this smooth every night. Swaddle has to be tight, baby has to be full, and we do it all with a couple of night lights and minimal talking. Fan on for white noise. For me the 1 1/2 hours way is still worth it b/c baby girl sleeps pretty great if we're thorough and don't skip any steps.

sokomo · October 2015

Have you tried giving your LO a pacifier instead of your finger and instead of rocking her? My baby needed to suck on something and/or be bounced around in order to fall asleep between nighttime feedings but the past week or so she started taking the pacifier and now it's all she needs to soothe herself back to sleep. Might be worth a try!

paine0925 · October 2015

She is not a big fan of the pacifier - we've tried several different kinds, one she likes okay enough to suck on it for a few minutes here and there but she seems very indifferent to it. We can usually get her to suck it if we put our finger in her mouth to suck then slip in the pacifier in place of our finger - but it's hit or miss and she usually pushes it out of her mouth :-( I really wish she would love pacifiers - but then again, babies seem to change so much maybe she will take it one of these days and love it!?

v1wwo · October 2015

I pump so both me and my husband can feed the little one with bottles at night. He takes the 2am shift and I take the 6am shift.
Well, my husband prides himself on taking a short time to feed, change, put to sleep..... Last night on my shift I unswaddle and what do I see? Diaper down to her knees, and poop everywhere.......
So it's not about how fast you do it. It's about how well you do it.

theglitteredpterodactyl · October 2015

kanga915 said:

Can you burp LO on your shoulder while you rock her so she burps as she falls asleep? That might save some time too. Just ideas. Otherwise, just know this is temporary.

I cosleep and BF in the bed, then hand her off to my partner for a diaper change. She wakes up during that part and might even cry a smidge, but I nurse her afterward the diaper change and then swap me for a pacifier when she's like 90% asleep and starts to fall of the boob. If she's taking too long to fall asleep, I'll burp and bounce her gently over my shoulder and that usually conks her out at night. I hold her for twenty minutes or so before putting her back down to sleep. It usually takes mayyyybe 40 minutes? She also sleeps for 4-4-2 or 5-3-2 hr stretches at night. so we usually end up just doing this twice ( ie she falls asleep at 7:00, we go to bed around 9:00, she wakes around midnight, back to sleep at 1:00, wakes around 4:00, asleep around 530 and then wakes for a final stretch around 730 or 830.

BrianaJ0917 · October 2015

Ours takes an hour and 20 min if all goes well but generally ends up being closer to 2 hours!! Usually he wakes up..I stick the paci in long enough for me to go pee..I go grab a bottle if water and maybe a snack, toss that in the chair..go unswaddle and change diaper (must be changed or he lees through clothes) if he's already peed through his clothes we change those too and wipe down with a baby wipe. Then we feed...usually 30 min on one side..burp 2-5 min..feed the other side 20-30 min until he falls asleep...burp again. Then re-swaddle and rock to sleep usually takes about 5-20 minutes.
Generally our routine looks something like this..
7pm feed
8:30pm bath,pjs,cuddles
9:30-10:30pm feed
10:30pm swaddle and rock to sleep
11pm bed
4:30/5am wake, change diaper, feed and burp, re-swaddle and rock to sleep
6/7am lay down
8:30/9:30 wake
(Gonna suck when I go back to work and don't get to lay back down at 6/7 and only sleep 11ish to 4:30ish if I'm lucky!)

***Then of course there's nights like tonight where I'm sitting here and it's 2:30am and we haven't been to bed yet!!!***

katythelady22 · October 2015

I nurse for as long as it takes, burp for 2-3 mins, change diaper, swaddle, then lay her right down when she's awake. She's used to it now so she just soothes herself to sleep. She's 8weekd old. Usually takes about 30mins to an hour depending how hungry she is.

SarahEmmons330 · October 2015

Our nighttime routine is maybe a half an hour, he wakes up and I immediately feed him and once he is done eating it's a burp and right back into his bassinet by our bed! I don't ever change him at night unless he's fussing really bad or I can smell a BM. I read that when you change the diaper at night it wakes them up more and takes longer to settle back down, ever since we stopped the changing every time things have moved so much smoother! So even if he is up every two hours I still end up with a nice solid nights sleep!

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