5 Months Pregnant. Newly Single.

iamjustj · October 2015

My boyfriend just told me today he's moving out because he is upsets/ resents that I'm pregnant. He feels that our relationship can't progress given that resentment. I'm devastated. It's not a financial issue - I can support myself. It's just that I don't have family (adopted). I don't have friends because I've spent my career travelling. I am completely alone. I have no idea what to do.

VitaLuna · October 2015

We're always here! I'm sorry you're going through that, but it sounds like he wasn't cut out for this anyway. Try to join a birth class or find a mom's group to see if you can make some connections with other mamas there.

cbou · October 2015

I'm sorry you are going through this. It sounds like you and baby are better off without him. I agree about finding local momma groups. For example, try searching for a baby wearing group, a hike it baby group, or a La Leche group.

loveree · October 2015

You'll be fine stay strong God will send you someone that loves you and will embrace you and the baby ,don't get discouraged

shupertj09 · October 2015

It sounds like in the long run you'll be better off without him. After all, you didn't crawl on top of yourself and get pregnant. Be strong momma, and take his butt to court for child support.

Edit: grammar

22snc12 · October 2015

I'm sorry this happened. Also, that's really f'd up. And definitely get his new address, so the courts know where to find him!

ohbaby714 · October 2015

Sorry you're going through this. I agree with the others about finding a mommy group in your area for support. You're probably better off without him if those are the feelings he is having.

middy411 · October 2015

Just curious, why does being adopted mean that you have no family? I'm adopted too and while I don't live near any of my family, I still have them for emotional support just a phone call away. I'm not particularly close with my adoptive family but I'm learning as the older I get that our differences do not matter and i am so fortunate to have their love and support in all that I do.

lubaTO · October 2015

Sorry to hear

BD also dumped me at 3 months for various reasons about our relationship not working out. We are still back and forth and he is still very much involved with the baby, but it is extremely hard. I completely understand you!

Please let me know if you want to chat and PM me, it has really helped me to talk things out with some of the ladies in the Single Parents forum.

You are in a situation that unfortunately is not that uncommon. I thought I was alone and still feel it a lot, but I've learnt that many women go through this for one reason or another. Stay strong. It's very early on right now so your feelings are probably all over the place, so take it one day at a time and work on your own plan for yourself and LO.

iamjustj · October 2015

My adoptive family was very abusive. I left home at 17 and had no further contact.

camusoh2011 · October 2015

Boys are stupid and from the sound of it you will be better without him. I know that right now it's a struggle emotionally to be adjusting to handling things on your own. All I can say is that sometimes it's for the best and you will be just fine! Like others have said, try to find a mommy group in your area to meet some other great mamas who might be able to help you out.

nbc2015 · October 2015

You are so much stronger than you think you are. Like PP, I'm sorry that this has happened to you, but you will come out on the other side. And yes, take his ass to court for child support!

jaimeruns · October 2015

I'm really sorry, that totally sucks. Like PPs said, you're better off without him in your life. You should only have supportive people in your corner (aka all of us!). Birthing classes and such might help you meet others, and remember being independent is a beautiful and admirable thing. You are going to be a role model for your LO and they will look up to you one day. You go girl! And definitely go after him in court!

mamacastro · October 2015

I usually stay out of people's business but I just wanted to say you are never alone. Besides you don't want to raise a child with someone like that anyways if he should come back later. The most important thing is to do what is best for your LO and right now that is to not stress out over something like this and focus on your child getting here because that's more important than some guy who may have not been serious after all. In the long run you will be a stronger person because you will do what it takes to be mom and dad and your child will respect that and appreciate it later in life. I know because I was a young single mother when I had my first DS and I didn't think I was going to make it but I found my DH and he has been the best husband, dad, and friend I could ever ask for and that will all happen for you later on. Like I said you are never truly alone. Maybe reach out and try to find mom groups on FB or in your local area. Maybe take a class where you can meet other moms or i'm always here to talk to if you ever need to

strlitemiss · October 2015

I'm sorry, lean on us if you need to. It's a tough spot.

oxsarah7ox · October 2015

Like all PPs have said, so sorry you are going through this. I agree that looking into mommy groups in your area would be helpful. There are usually a ton on facebook. There is also a section of boards here for certain areas, maybe one is from where you live.

oxfordlanding · October 2015

That totally sucks. It may not be much consolation but my mum was a single mother and we have a very close relationship now. She did an amazing job raising me. I'm sure you will do the same. You've got this.

Knottie1455832158 · October 2015

jaimeruns said:
I'm really sorry, that totally sucks. Like PPs said, you're better off without him in your life. You should only have supportive people in your corner (aka all of us!). Birthing classes and such might help you meet others, and remember being independent is a beautiful and admirable thing. You are going to be a role model for your LO and they will look up to you one day. You go girl! And definitely go after him in court!

^^^This! I also noticed that since becoming pregnant, it seems that other pregnant women (or women with very young children) are coming out of the woodwork. In my neighborhood, at church, at work, etc. You may find that you have a support group of women right in your backyard, just waiting to support you! You are strong and beautiful, and probably even more so without him.

4N6s · October 2015

I'm so sorry

iamjustj · October 2015

Thanks everyone for the advice.

mmgp97 · January 2016

@iamjustj Hey, I'm a first time mom and rather young to be one. My ex also dumped me but it was before we found out I was pregnant. Regardless of this, I have found support in communities and family. I know it may seem scary, but I'm sure it will be worth it in the end. The fact that you were able to come out on top is proof of that. Don't let him get to you.

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