I am saying it is not good to do a lot of things while pregnant. But people still do them. I don't think it is good to smoke while pregnant, but I don't think it is my place to criticize someone I don't know for smoking, because I don't know enough about them to know their particular situation. If it was a close friend or loved one, I might compassionately discuss my concerns with them and offer help to quit. Smoking is an addiction, I think most people who do it are not happy they do it. I just wouldn't judge based an encounter with someone I don't know. I don't think it is equivalent to child abuse. The health risks associated with smoking are not much different than caffeine and other things that are socially acceptable and people wouldn't accuse a pregnant of abuse for drinking a coffee. It could be one coffee in a week or it could be her 5th coffee that day, and the same is true for the cigarette that I am seeing. But that is just my opinion and I don't expect everyone to agree with me.
Open a book or a browser tab and do some research because you're just spewing ignorance.
If there's something strange underneath the hood. Who you gonna call? Your Doctor. If there's something weird and it don't look good. Who you gonna call? Your Doctor. Immediately. If it's new, painful, and possibly pregnancy related get your ass off the internet and call your doctor. It's for your health and your child's.
I am saying it is not good to do a lot of things while pregnant. But people still do them. I don't think it is good to smoke while pregnant, but I don't think it is my place to criticize someone I don't know for smoking, because I don't know enough about them to know their particular situation. If it was a close friend or loved one, I might compassionately discuss my concerns with them and offer help to quit. Smoking is an addiction, I think most people who do it are not happy they do it. I just wouldn't judge based an encounter with someone I don't know. I don't think it is equivalent to child abuse. The health risks associated with smoking are not much different than caffeine and other things that are socially acceptable and people wouldn't accuse a pregnant of abuse for drinking a coffee. It could be one coffee in a week or it could be her 5th coffee that day, and the same is true for the cigarette that I am seeing. But that is just my opinion and I don't expect everyone to agree with me.
What exactly does their personal situation have to do with smoking? In no situation is it ever OK to smoke while pregnant. People who make excuses for doing horrible things while pregnant, and the people who defend them, honestly make me sick. This is a known poisonous substance we're talking about, not caffeine. You should Google what a smoker's placenta looks like. Maybe that will help realign your thinking.
It's nobody else's place to get involved really. I think being fat and having a bad diet is bad for baby too. Are you going to shout at a fat person for eating McDonald's? People know the risks and don't need a lecture from an interfering busy body. I'd never do that. I don't smoke and am healthier than most but I wouldn't stick my oar in someone else's business as it's not my problem.
I smoked lightly (1 cigarette or less a day), vaped using an electronic cigarette, and drank a lot of coffee, before I found out I was pregnant. The moment the test came out positive I immediately quit all of them and will not allow my fiancé to vape around me because I don't want any of the chemicals to impact my LO. However I did work with a woman who smoked heavily throughout her whole pregnancy and when I asked her about it nicely, she told me that she didn't believe that smoking was bad for pregnant woman because every single woman in her family smoked throughout pregnancy and everyone was born healthy. Unless the smoke is directly affecting me (someone blowing the smoke in my face or around my table if I was at a restrauant) I wouldn't say anything.
Wow so glad I came on to this thread and promptly got fat-shamed for harming my baby by being overweight. Well I get only perfectly healthy 25 year olds should be birthing the worlds babies. Am I fat? Yes. Am I still making every effort to keep baby healthy? Yes, so don't tell me I'm as bad as someone not bothering to think of baby's health.
flas said:
Wow so glad I came on to this thread and promptly got fat-shamed for harming my baby by being overweight. Well I get only perfectly healthy 25 year olds should be birthing the worlds babies. Am I fat? Yes. Am I still making every effort to keep baby healthy? Yes, so don't tell me I'm as bad as someone not bothering to think of baby's health.
THANK YOU. I felt the same way, and just didn't know how to word it without it being a violation, I'm still miffed. I'm overweight and my doctor and I are struggling to get me to gain instead of lose, I'm now only 3 pounds up from my pre-baby weight. I've done my best to keep Oliver healthy and growing, and heaven forbid someone be damned for having a cheeseburger every once in a while, fat or not.
I have always been a non-smoker so I don't know from any personal experience how hard it is to quit smoking, but it is possible that a pregnant woman is unable to completely quit. Not all pregnancies are planned and quitting, as it seems to me, is an individual experience that people have differing degrees of difficulty with. I don't think it is anyone's place to say anything to a perfect stranger smoking a cigarette. You don't know how often they smoke or what they have or haven't tried doing.
There are a lot of things that are not good for the baby when a woman is pregnant, being overweight, gaining too much weight, being out of shape, not getting enough exercise, getting too much exercise, not eating enough, being too thin, being over 35, having a chronic illness, smoking, drinking alcohol, too much caffeine, not drinking enough fluids, not getting enough rest, too much stress, eating certain foods like sushi, under cooked meat and lunch meat etc... Who are we to say which thing is worse for the baby (are we doctors), and how much of something, a person we don't know, is doing. I think if you don't know the person, you also don't know the frequency of the "bad" thing and you don't know what they have tried already. And many people smoke while pregnant and still have very healthy children. And people who do everything according to the book can end up with a child with disabilities.
I know I am 38, I have lupus, so I am taking a risk of having a child with problems, but I still purposely conceived and I am thrilled to be having a wonderful baby girl. But some people could see it as wrong to conceive when there is an increased risk of health problems, but I don't think it is their right to say anything about it. I will love and care for my child no matter what, and I am doing everything I can to help her not have any problems. But my 15 year old son's teacher felt comfortable telling him that I am too old to be having a child and that there is a high risk that she will have health problems because of my age. And even though he is right about the increased risk, it was wrong for him to say anything about it.
I had a cup of coffee today and skipped my evening walk around the neighborhood. Damn... Should have checked in on TB first. Apparently I'm compromising my baby's health as much as a woman who continues to smoke while pregnant... Said no doctor ever...
I have always been a non-smoker so I don't know from any personal experience how hard it is to quit smoking, but it is possible that a pregnant woman is unable to completely quit. Not all pregnancies are planned and quitting, as it seems to me, is an individual experience that people have differing degrees of difficulty with.
Ho boy. Quick little background for those who haven't seen me floating around. I currently (and for many years) work as a mental health counselor at a treatment facility for a range of patients including behavioral and aggressive developmentally delayed individuals as well as detox and individuals dealing with substance abuse (addiction counseling). Normally I find this irrelevant to add into a conversation or use as a disclaimer unless it helps offer some insight or validation to topic.
I have yet to experience (and frankly in what world would anyone have the cahones to say) that " it is possible that a pregnant woman is unable to completely quit". No, no, I assure you, it is incredibly possible. Smoking is a *behavorial* addiction with a secondary *physical* addiction. Grab a patch, taper with vape, chew some gum, or cold turkey are all completely legitimate, successful ways to quit smoking and after x amount of time the nicotine can leave your body (mind you not the affects) and the physical addiction leaves. If instead people can't stop smoking because they need the social aspect or can't deal with stress, that is a learned behavior that can be replaced with different coping strategies and grounding techniques. Out of the many, many, many substances out there -physically and behavorially addicting, smoking is by no means the biggest challenge that should even be near or associated with the word 'impossible' and it realllyyyyy grinds my gears that anyone might give someone else validation for this habit during pregnancy with a statement like that.
I have Insulin controlled GD, likewise I drink 1 maybe 2 cups of coffee a day- by no means am I incurring nearly the form of damage to my baby than that of something with a whole laundry list of foreign chemicals might. Nope,nope, nope.
I had a coffee, 2 pieces of pumpkin spiced cake, didn't have my afternoon nap and didn't do exercise... Hi my name is Nicole and I'm clearly a horrible person for putting my baby at such harm. I feel I should also mention my OB has informed me to rest more and take it easy and slow down due to some contractions and an irritable uterus but I'll be sure to inform her at my next appointment that she was clearly incorrect at telling me this. Oh, and she also recommended black coffee to help my morning sickness but I'll be sure to tell her that she basically said I should smoke during pregnancy.... Thank goodness I came on the bump today :-O
I had a coffee, 2 pieces of pumpkin spiced cake, didn't have my afternoon nap and didn't do exercise... Hi my name is Nicole and I'm clearly a horrible person for putting my baby at such harm. I feel I should also mention my OB has informed me to rest more and take it easy and slow down due to some contractions and an irritable uterus but I'll be sure to inform her at my next appointment that she was clearly incorrect at telling me this. Oh, and she also recommended black coffee to help my morning sickness but I'll be sure to tell her that she basically said I should smoke during pregnancy.... Thank goodness I came on the bump today :-O
Unfit mother! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to spend some quality time with my DS and get my walk on...
Dammit I am over 35!! I am doing so much harm to my baby just because of my age that I should just go out tonight and do shots of fireball and smoke some ciggies! Ooh maybe some drugs too, it's all the same!
Not that this will really make a difference, but I smoked half a pack to a pack a day. The moment I peed on that test and it said positive I dropped them i was lucky and had no problem this is no longer about me and my selfish wants and I don't look back yes I have gained alot of weight and eat crap I shouldn't but I would rather have gained too much weight than fill my body with something harmful like a cigarette. I personally don't believe in the if you quit you will have a miscarriage I think it's better to quit sooner than later, if someone personally has to quit by tapering off than good for them for atleast making an effort and trying to do what's best. The thing is being over weight and a cup of coffee are nothing compared to smoking I would rather see a pregnant woman at a coffee shop than a smoke filled place any day. After 2 miscarriages maybe that is why I am so obsessive about careless behavior, but I know that it is possible to stop smoking and any addiction because the life inside of you depends on it. Just because so and so had a healthy baby when they smoked the whole time doesn't mean you should play with the gift you were giving and chance it because you may not be so lucky. I'm done...
I feel like smoking and drinking alcohol are huge no no's during pregnancy and cannot believe how many people ignore the risks. But basically not my circus, not my monkeys and I know my baby won't be prone to the side effects of either because I chose not to expose him to either in utero just my opinion.
Just going to throw this out there knowing the possibility of negative comments in my direction. I have been a smoker for ten years. I quit when I found out I was pregnant, for a week. It made me violently sick and I lost 15 pounds. My OB told me that I shouldn't quit, just cut back as much as I can. I never had morning sickness, nor have I had any other problems. I don't have high blood pressure, or GD, nor is there anything wrong with my baby. He's measuring big for 36 weeks, and my doctor is going to test his lung function for me after he's born. I'm not trying to justify smoking while pregnant. I hate that I do. I'm just saying that while most of the habit is a mental addiction, if you don't know the situation, it's not your business. Everybody handles quitting differently. Everyone handles stress differently. And stress isn't good for a pregnancy either. And it does put a lot of stress on the body to quit any addictive habit. But I've had people tell me that I should quit smoking, and while it doesn't irritate me so much because I know they're concerned, I just politely smile and tell them I should have stayed with my abusive boyfriend so that my baby could have a father, too. It's none of your business if it's a stranger. She could have been more considerate though by not smoking by the door or around other people.
The idea that drinking coffee is as bad as smoking cigarettes for your LO is hysterical. Cigarettes are so much worse... you simply cannot equate the two in any way. As to whether you should say something to a pregnant smoker, I personally would not. It's a mind your own damn business situation. Just because I do not agree with what someone else chooses to do, doesn't mean that person deserves a lecture from me. Unless that person has engaged me in the smoking in some way, I'm going to keep my mouth shut... do unto others as you want them to do unto you. I know I don't want lectures from strangers.
I smoked before I fell pregnant, I went cold turkey when I found out because seriously, how can the pleasure I get from having a cigarette ever be worth the risk of harming my child! I won't even eat a runny egg yolk! The thing that gets me about pregnant women smoking in public is that they don't seem to be ashamed! I mean I was at a family party last week and went to the bar to get my Nanna a drink, I made sure I pointed out the drink was not for me! I know you shouldn't care what other people think when you are making the right choices but damn! To stand outside the labour ward smoking (something me and my SO saw last week) do these ladies have no shame??!! Where I'm from the govenment were talking about introducing a scheme where pregnant mothers would be offered £500 worth of vouchers to quit smoking!!! My SO suggested I pretended to still smoke and sign up, I told him id be to mortified to have peope think that I valued £500 abovey babies health! The thought that £500 might just persuade someone to quit when doing the right thing for their child couldn't knocked me sick! Ugh! Sorry for the essay!
Shamefully I admit to being one of those "prego smokers" im 36 weeks and still indulge in a few ciggies a day. I used to be a very heavy smoker a pack or more a day. I have cut down by a hell of a lot but have not stopped
If you have never tried to quit smoking, well you have no right to comment. It is hard and it is very stressfull. The day after we found out about baby #2 My partner of 4 years and father of our 3 yr came out and told me hes been sleeping with a 18yr behind my back and she wanted him to leave me because I was pregnant again. And guess what, He left Us.
So I was on my own, pregnant, with a 3 year old and running a dairy farm. So im going to admit it, No I didn't quit cold turkey. Some days I didnt have any som,e days I had 1 or 2..
But for example the other night (Thursday night), my Ex came here drunk and assaulted me while I lay in bed at 34weeks, So I went and sat in the paddock with my horses and cried and had a smoke while I waited for police. Its not the first time he has assaulted me this pregnancy. I have been admitted to hospital 3 times due to stress and anixity.
I know its no excuse, but you cant point the finger at people and judge them for there choices. You never know what people are going through. And some people handle things better than others. Im happy to say I have quit because I don't crave them anymore but I do have times where I relapse. Its not easy.....
This thread is insane. First things first, no one can force you to start smoking. The facts are out there about the harm it causes to your health and if you make the decision to start smoking...fine. I don't care - it is your body. Having the facts and electing to smoke is your right. That said, once you become pregnant it is no longer just your health at stake so I can understand how some react strongly to seeing a pregnant woman smoke. Would I personally say anything to that woman? No, but bet your ass I am going to judge. Many women give up things they are addicted to or have a very strong pull towards, but being or preparing to become a parent means making selfless decisions no matter how difficult it is for you. You can make the decision to stop if you really want to. I know plenty of women who quit addictive activities (smoking, heavy alcohol consumption, drugs) cold turkey once they became pregnant. Was it easy for them? Hell no. They still did it though.
Second, just because some women choose never to start smoking doesn't mean they can't comment on this thread. Addiction comes in many forms - not just nicotine. Many women can relate to quitting something cold turkey knowing it is best for their LOs. Even those who aren't addicted to one of the big pregnancy "No Nos" can relate to having to make personal sacrifices or decisions for their child(ren) regardless of personal hardships or preferences. I'm sorry some of you are going through personal adversities while struggling to quit, but if you do care to stop perhaps speak to your OB about other coping mechanisms for any personal considerations (stress, anxiety, depression, etc).
This thread is insane. First things first, no one can force you to start smoking. The facts are out there about the harm it causes to your health and if you make the decision to start smoking...fine. I don't care - it is your body. Having the facts and electing to smoke is your right. That said, once you become pregnant it is no longer just your health at stake so I can understand how some react strongly to seeing a pregnant woman smoke. Would I personally say anything to that woman? No, but bet your ass I am going to judge. Many women give up things they are addicted to or have a very strong pull towards, but being or preparing to become a parent means making selfless decisions no matter how difficult it is for you. You can make the decision to stop if you really want to. I know plenty of women who quit addictive activities (smoking, heavy alcohol consumption, drugs) cold turkey once they became pregnant. Was it easy for them? Hell no. They still did it though.
Second, just because some women choose never to start smoking doesn't mean they can't comment on this thread. Addiction comes in many forms - not just nicotine. Many women can relate to quitting something cold turkey knowing it is best for their LOs. Even those who aren't addicted to one of the big pregnancy "No Nos" can relate to having to make personal sacrifices or decisions for their child(ren) regardless of personal hardships or preferences. I'm sorry some of you are going through personal adversities while struggling to quit, but if you do care to stop perhaps speak to your OB about other coping mechanisms for any personal considerations (stress, anxiety, depression, etc).
All the yes. I was a heavy smoker and I quit. It wasn't easy, some days still aren't but I have peace of mind knowing my LO and I are healthier for it, and when it all comes down to it, that's all that matters.
If you have never tried to quit smoking, well you have no right to comment. It is hard and it is very stressfull. The day after we found out about baby #2 My partner of 4 years and father of our 3 yr came out and told me hes been sleeping with a 18yr behind my back and she wanted him to leave me because I was pregnant again. And guess what, He left Us.
So I was on my own, pregnant, with a 3 year old and running a dairy farm. So im going to admit it, No I didn't quit cold turkey. Some days I didnt have any som,e days I had 1 or 2..
But for example the other night (Thursday night), my Ex came here drunk and assaulted me while I lay in bed at 34weeks, So I went and sat in the paddock with my horses and cried and had a smoke while I waited for police. Its not the first time he has assaulted me this pregnancy. I have been admitted to hospital 3 times due to stress and anixity.
I know its no excuse, but you cant point the finger at people and judge them for there choices. You never know what people are going through. And some people handle things better than others. Im happy to say I have quit because I don't crave them anymore but I do have times where I relapse. Its not easy.....
First of I'm sorry your ex is a D goal secondly it takes more courage to walk way then too stay. Thirdly ur doing the best you can that's all anyone can ask of you.
Re: Seeing a Preggo Smoker
THANK YOU. I felt the same way, and just didn't know how to word it without it being a violation, I'm still miffed. I'm overweight and my doctor and I are struggling to get me to gain instead of lose, I'm now only 3 pounds up from my pre-baby weight. I've done my best to keep Oliver healthy and growing, and heaven forbid someone be damned for having a cheeseburger every once in a while, fat or not.
Ho boy. Quick little background for those who haven't seen me floating around. I currently (and for many years) work as a mental health counselor at a treatment facility for a range of patients including behavioral and aggressive developmentally delayed individuals as well as detox and individuals dealing with substance abuse (addiction counseling). Normally I find this irrelevant to add into a conversation or use as a disclaimer unless it helps offer some insight or validation to topic.
I have yet to experience (and frankly in what world would anyone have the cahones to say) that " it is possible that a pregnant woman is unable to completely quit".
No, no, I assure you, it is incredibly possible. Smoking is a *behavorial* addiction with a secondary *physical* addiction. Grab a patch, taper with vape, chew some gum, or cold turkey are all completely legitimate, successful ways to quit smoking and after x amount of time the nicotine can leave your body (mind you not the affects) and the physical addiction leaves. If instead people can't stop smoking because they need the social aspect or can't deal with stress, that is a learned behavior that can be replaced with different coping strategies and grounding techniques. Out of the many, many, many substances out there -physically and behavorially addicting, smoking is by no means the biggest challenge that should even be near or associated with the word 'impossible' and it realllyyyyy grinds my gears that anyone might give someone else validation for this habit during pregnancy with a statement like that.
I have Insulin controlled GD, likewise I drink 1 maybe 2 cups of coffee a day- by no means am I incurring nearly the form of damage to my baby than that of something with a whole laundry list of foreign chemicals might. Nope,nope, nope.
Thanks for playing!
I have been a heavy smoker for 15 years.
If you have never tried to quit smoking, well you have no right to comment.
It is hard and it is very stressfull.
The day after we found out about baby #2
My partner of 4 years and father of our 3 yr came out and told me hes been sleeping with a 18yr behind my back and she wanted him to leave me because I was pregnant again. And guess what, He left Us.
So I was on my own, pregnant, with a 3 year old and running a dairy farm.
So im going to admit it, No I didn't quit cold turkey. Some days I didnt have any som,e days I had 1 or 2..
But for example the other night (Thursday night), my Ex came here drunk and assaulted me while I lay in bed at 34weeks, So I went and sat in the paddock with my horses and cried and had a smoke while I waited for police.
Its not the first time he has assaulted me this pregnancy.
I have been admitted to hospital 3 times due to stress and anixity.
I know its no excuse, but you cant point the finger at people and judge them for there choices.
You never know what people are going through.
And some people handle things better than others.
Im happy to say I have quit because I don't crave them anymore but I do have times where I relapse.
Its not easy.....
Second, just because some women choose never to start smoking doesn't mean they can't comment on this thread. Addiction comes in many forms - not just nicotine. Many women can relate to quitting something cold turkey knowing it is best for their LOs. Even those who aren't addicted to one of the big pregnancy "No Nos" can relate to having to make personal sacrifices or decisions for their child(ren) regardless of personal hardships or preferences. I'm sorry some of you are going through personal adversities while struggling to quit, but if you do care to stop perhaps speak to your OB about other coping mechanisms for any personal considerations (stress, anxiety, depression, etc).