November 2015 Moms
melaniejayyy
member
Options
Negativity..
melaniejayyy
member
I've been quietly using this app throughout my whole pregnancy. I think I only posted once and got many rude negative comments because the question had been asked before. So I decided to not post my questions and quietly observe everyone else's. I just wanted to say I've never seen so much negativity in a place where people were supposed to be supporting each other. You all should be ashamed of yourself.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Negativity..
This is not going to end well.
Why are you even posting this?
Also this isn't a "support group" full of rainbows, butterflies and unicorn farts. It's a community. You should be ashamed of yourself for stirring shit up.
And I'm out.
2. A lot of questions are easily answered with Google. Or previous posts found via searching. Like, I've been having a ton of Braxton hicks in the last few days. I'm a FTM. Kinda concerning. But a quick Google search gave me info I needed without starting a new thread that would clog up the board.
3. Asking for opinions versus using the board as a personal diary are different things. People get mad when others try to give opinions saying "I didn't want advice." this is a community. A "dear diary" post is frankly useless, we prefer engaging in conversation together.
4. A of of us have been here since we got our BFP. I personally have been here since March. I "know" a lot of these ladies very well, what they've been through, their struggles and accomplishments, etc. I have developed and maintained relationships with other users. While you see a lot of negativity, you're obviously missing the times we've all been there for each other for support. Of course the drive by posters asking ridiculous questions we couldn't possibly have an answer for (or that could be easily solved with a Google search) are gonna ruffle feathers.
That's my 2 cents. And honestly, when you get x number of pregnant women together who are all dealing with so many major life changes, uncomfortable symptoms, etc. There's bound to be some differing opinions. And a lot of people frankly lack common sense, or at least need to be given a dose of reality regarding some situations (aka, don't complain about a baby shower gift, pay for your own baby, entitlement issues, etc.)
Edit: because it's late and needed to tidy up and add words
All the gender disappointment threads ... The entitled baby shower threads & of course, everyone's new favorite hot topic of conversation ...
"HELP! I'm bleeding and having contractions. WHAT DO I DO threads!"
& then there are the women who constantly use The Bump communities as their own personal Google. It is frustrating for those of us that come here on a regular basis and actually contribute.
If you actually lurked you would see that when a woman genuinely needs support she will get it... TONS of it for that matter. I highly recommend that you go check out any one of the various threads of women in the hospital on bed rest hoping and praying that their baby stays put just a little while longer. All these women that you are calling negative are the FIRST to comment and wish the OP the best of luck and offer their support.
Maybe you should just go back to lurking a little bit more since you clearly have no understanding how this community works.
https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12630762/am-i-actually-going-into-labor
She asked if she was going into labor. Of course we all said to CALL THE DOCTOR. Some responses were snarky, sure, but it was like the third or fourth "what should I do" thread regarding contractions, bleeding, etc.
Later on she came back to update, and you'll see many of the same members saying they are glad she was OK, and explaining why we didn't all just sit around scratching our heads debating if she was in labor.
Also, we've had many, many mama's in the hospital recently with babies trying to come early. Any of those threads you'll see nothing but love and support.
You just have to look around at the dynamic of the boards, and it'll become pretty clear how it works. That's why the bump has a 3 day waiting period before new users can post. Unfortunately, most people don't care to contribute or be a part of this group, and instead just want to get their answers and move on. Correction, they want to get the answers they WANT to hear, and then move on. Heaven forbid anyone disagrees.
I must have pretty bad timing when it comes to reading posts on here then. I don't "lurk" all day or even everyday for that matter.
You basically just walked into a room of women who have been getting to know each other and have bonded over the last SEVERAL months and said, "you guys are mean!"
Pretty rude in my opinion.
I don't think I'm better than anyone. Clearly no one is seeing my point here so I'm gonna stop trying. Continue tearing one another down!
And to "jscasher" thanks for giving me legit answers instead of snarky comments, I do appreciate it.
People need constructive criticism and some people need to be told they're being an idiot and to get to the dr end of story really
Seriously though, it's the most adorable little stack of pancakes.
If you had lurked you would have known there don't go over very well.
Because I'm bored with eating popcorn
Personally, I'm going to go back to providing frequent advice, support, and a dash of snark to the community which I've been told that other members appreciate. Please continue your incredibly valuable contributions to the community as well.
Maintaining a welcoming environment in the community is something we take very seriously. We welcome debate and engaging dialogue from all perspectives here. We do not tolerate bullying. If you feel you’ve experienced bullying within the community:
Please:
-Flag comments that violate our TOU by using the “Report a TOU Violation” feature below posts
- Send a Private Message to @BumpTara or @BumpCaitlin describing your concerns or send an email to communitybump@xogrp.com and include links to any threads that you are concerned about so we can properly investigate.
Please do not:
- Post on the boards about your grievances with the community or individual members. Doing so tends to result in unproductive arguments among members and escalates situations.
By flagging posts that violate the TOU and sharing your concerns directly with our moderators, we are able to address issues promptly and properly.
We will be closing this thread for further comments. Thank you.