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Bday/Christmas Presents for multiples

SummerFall03SummerFall03 member
edited September 2015 in Multiples
Ok, so I have my soon to be 3 year old birthdays for my twins coming up, then soon after we have Christmas. The problem we have been facing is our family is giving them 1 present... and it's normally something that cannot be shared. For example: 1 blanket, 1 pillow, 1 telephone toy, 5 random pairs of pjs- why not 4 or 6, 1 stuffed animal etc.

I appreciate the fact that they are given a gift, but they are being treated like 1 person, and they are now starting to notice it. I'm all for sharing, and they are really good about it, but I feel really sorry when they are treated like 1 person, because they are in fact 2 separate individuals who happen to be born at the same time.

With the holidays coming up, how do we approach family members without coming off as ungrateful? If money was an issue, we have suggested things that can be combined for the 2 of them, that are also cheaper. Ironically, the family members who are doing this, are actually spending MORE money on the individual present. Does this make sense?

Anyways, I'm really looking for some help/advice on how to approach the situation. I will probably post on my BMB Jan'16 as well because I'm not too sure of the traffic on the 2 boards.

Thanks in advance!


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Re: Bday/Christmas Presents for multiples

  • DolphinLover2002DolphinLover2002 member
    I would just be honest. Tell them that they are old enough now that they know they are only getting something to share. Ask that they are given individual gifts. Tell them the twins are just that, twins. There are 2 of them. I know it's a really crappy situation, but if it was me, I would ask them to either do 2 smaller gifts, or just not do anything at all. They need to be treated as individuals. Good luck.

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  • camusoh2011camusoh2011 member
    Like PP said, I would think that politely suggesting two smaller gifts should go over well or none at all. If all else fails and money is an issue maybe they can agree that one group of people get for one kiddo and another group gets for the other so they both have their own gifts.

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  • SummerFall03SummerFall03 member

    camusoh2011 said:
    Like PP said, I would think that politely suggesting two smaller gifts should go over well or none at all. If all else fails and money is an issue maybe they can agree that one group of people get for one kiddo and another group gets for the other so they both have their own gifts.
    I think this is what we are going to attempt to do. The problem is, my husbands sister likes flea market shopping- definitely cool, but then she finds gifts for 1 person. Then my kids fight, I have to take the toy away and no one ends up getting it. She won't like the idea of getting something specific. For ex: my brother and his fiance tend to give individual gifts, so we suggested a hot wheels race track for the boys, and it went great! So that is sorted out, but my SIL won't have any part of it. :/
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  • Knottie1442268460Knottie1442268460 member
    Your SIL is cheap.
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  • SummerFall03SummerFall03 member
    Baby'smom said:
    Your SIL is cheap.
    She is also an a**hole lol!
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  • DolphinLover2002DolphinLover2002 member
    I'd just tell her not to get anything then.

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  • spoonlegspoonleg member
    ONE PILLOW? Someone gave twin 3-year-olds ONE PILLOW as a gift? Oy.

    My twins were born on Christmas Day. They are currently 9 months old so I don't know how it will play out for them, but I worry sometimes that they will feel gypped once they're old enough to notice. 

    But I seriously can't get over the one pillow thing. FFS. 
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  • SummerFall03SummerFall03 member
    spoonleg said:
    ONE PILLOW? Someone gave twin 3-year-olds ONE PILLOW as a gift? Oy.

    My twins were born on Christmas Day. They are currently 9 months old so I don't know how it will play out for them, but I worry sometimes that they will feel gypped once they're old enough to notice. 

    But I seriously can't get over the one pillow thing. FFS. 
    Yep! 1 Thomas pillow! I had to hide it because they were just fighting over it constantly. That and a special keepsake Sesame Street blanket.
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  • ijaclynijaclyn member
    I would suggest perhaps she maybe by a game they can play together? Try the passive aggressive you are trying to work on sharing and teamwork and a game they can play with or against each other might be best. (this of course coming from a household that has had its share of tears over winners and losers in many games) GL- 1 pillow is the oddest thing I've heard. She knows they have separate beds, right?
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