My mom just came and picked up the kids for them to spend TWO nights with her. All day long I was counting down to her arrival, but mostly because every 15 seconds, DS and DD were asking where she was. Why is it taking so long? Go to Jujus house! As soon as she pulled out of the drive with my babies in the back seat, my heart just sank. I wanted nothing more than for her to just pull right back in and leave them. How can I be so anxious for a break, but then be so lonely when they're not here?
My husband and I need alone time. We really do. I think it is a very vital aspect to preserving our marriage.
But at the same time, my babies not being here reminds me just how much I've lost myself to motherhood. And this is not a bad thing - totally natural and expected, probably. But sometimes I wonder if I'll ever have time to do the things I used to love. Dance. Read books. Do crafts. Paint. Being a mother is the BEST responsibility I've ever been given, but 3.5 years of being completely devoted to my kids is slowly reminding me that I need to make time for myself as well. It's a very hard balance, but maybe one day I'll figure it out.
Also, we ran out for a quick dinner last night. It was late, cold outside, I'd worked almost 11.5 hours yesterday. So I threw on a frumpy sweatshirt. My husband immediately said I looked like I didn't give a sh** about how I looked. Although he was totally right, I really didn't give a sh**. And it pissed me off that he had the nerve to call me out on it. He NEVER criticizes the way I look, and in that moment, I was a monster. He didn't intend to come across as a complete jackass, and we later laughed it off, but still - the correct response: babe, you look great no matter what you wear. Period.
I had my first pregnancy meltdown yesterday. I don't remember being this emotional on my last pregnancy. My morning sickness kicked in full force so I feel like crap. Then my breaking point was after work and I went to pick my daughter up from daycare. She told me that someone has gone into her backpack and stole her snacks AGAIN. (For the 5th time) I was so beyond irritated and frustrated because this keeps happening. I blew up on her daycare directors about it. Again, they were reassuring and willing to find a resolution to prevent it from happening again. I was just so mad! I called my husband afterwards and started crying over stolen Cheeze-Its. )
(Me) 30 & (DH) 32 {Together 11 years - Married 04.17.15}
I haven't had any real meltdowns yet, but I did get unreasonbly sad about a magpie coming to my window and eating a spider that was hanging in front of it. I was all, "But that was my spider! " I didn't even know the spider was there before the magpie came to eat it, but it was my spider, damnit!
Yesterday morning I ran out the door with kid and dog in tow holding my breakfast smoothie. Unfortunately my dog was a little excited for daycare, bumped the kid, who then knocked my smoothie onto the cement and broke the cup. I cried all the way into my sons daycare.
I have not had any meltdowns so far yet with t his pregnancy (it is still early for this one so there is time), but last pregnancy I bawled like a baby while watching The Wonder Years on NetFlix. There was a scene where Kevin's dad helped him with his math homework. I bawled like a baby because that was so sweet. Time will only tell if and when a meltdown this time will occur.
DH used my car last night and when I went outside to go to work this morning, he parked it "wrong" in the driveway. Apparently, I didn't like how he parked it and started crying and went back inside to wake him up about it. Needless to say, that didn't go over so well at 7am. Luckily now, I can look back and laugh at it. Hopefully he can too tonight!
DH just got back from getting us lunch. I was sleeping when he left. He came back with a salad for me that typically I would probably eat, but it does not look appetizing at all. I saw it in the bag and told him that and he said 'You didn't tell me what you wanted' and I cried back 'You didn't ask'... Of course bc he didn't want to interrupt my nap. I stormed off and locked myself in my office bc I was so upset. And I made him upset so it makes me feel worse bc he was trying. So now I'm sad and hungry and I'm probably going to have to go out and get my own food and this will go to waste... Which makes me more upset.
@saladflambe I hear you on the Husband hate. I simultaneously want to snuggle with him and yell at him. And the good sport he is, he would totally be on board for it.
I have had two pretty good meltdowns already:
1. After a long bedtime battle with my 13 month old, I came downstairs. My husband asked me how much fun I had (a very typical joke for us) and I told him not to start, walked over to the couch and promptly fell asleep face down in the couch.
2. While sharing the remains of an apple pie last night, I snapped at my husband about taking such big bites. He proceeded to put his fork down and sit quietly while I profusely apologized and finished the pie myself.
Ugh, I had a bad one tonight that makes me sound like an awful person. My husband's grandma died yesterday, an hour after we confirmed our pregnancy at our first appointment. We're driving 4 hours for the funeral on Friday and when he told me he might be staying longer to help his family, I gave him attitude about it. I'm just so tired and I didn't want to drive back by myself. He called me on it and then I burst into tears. Of course I'm okay with him staying to help his family; I don't know what got into me! Luckily, he's a very forgiving person and he's over the whole meltdown already.
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
I sobbed. Uncontrollably sobbed while watching Tracy Morgan during the Emmys. I'm not a huge fan of his or anything, but I cried so hard during his speech. Thank goodness my husband was out of town. He would have thought I was nuts.
I went to a baby shower for DH's cousin' wide on Saturday. DH was watching a napping DD so it was going to be a great afternoon out of the house. I get to the party and the host (who I know well enough) is unloading groceries from her trunk. Yep, party was the next day. I'm still not sure if I was laughing or crying all the way home.
When my husband told me to wait to eat what I was wanting until after we got home after a camping trip. He would "make it" for me at home. He didn't want to "waste time" on the road going to a burrito place to pick up a burrito. The wait at that point was 3 hours for us to arrive home, much less unpack car, etc. The burrito place was 10 mins, if that, out of the way. This was after we went on a whole weekend camping trip where he said he would be in charge of the food for us if I packed all the food for our toddler. Toddler was great, I had all the food prepped and ready. Yet he forgot so many things for us. I spent the weekend camping and hiking with cereal without milk, burnt pancakes without syrup, burgers without spices, onions, or a bun, no cheese, no bread at all, no tea, and only 1 small glass of OJ to split over days, and there is more but I will spare you. NEVER AGAIN. Yeah, he went ahead and picked up the food after my mini meltdown.
The other night, I was trying to melt caramel on the stove to make caramel apples because I was dying for one. I looked away for TWO SECONDS, came back, and the caramel was burnt. DH who was watching tv looks over at me as I slump down and start sobbing over burnt caramel. So he comes over, scrubs out the pan, and melts fresh caramel for me. Unfortunately I could only eat about two bites before I felt nauseous and gave the rest to him.
Side note: I was telling my mom about this incident earlier today. I was totally laughing about it and she told me "you need to stop acting crazy or you're gonna run him off." Which completely caught me off guard and I am still weepy/fuming from that comment.
The other night, I was trying to melt caramel on the stove to make caramel apples because I was dying for one. I looked away for TWO SECONDS, came back, and the caramel was burnt. DH who was watching tv looks over at me as I slump down and start sobbing over burnt caramel. So he comes over, scrubs out the pan, and melts fresh caramel for me.
Unfortunately I could only eat about two bites before I felt nauseous and gave the rest to him.
Side note: I was telling my mom about this incident earlier today. I was totally laughing about it and she told me "you need to stop acting crazy or you're gonna run him off." Which completely caught me off guard and I am still weepy/fuming from that comment.
Hormones.
I would be weepy/fuming at that comment from your Mom as well! She's been through pregnancy (I'm guessing) so she should know how crazy hormones can make you.
I just had my first meltdown of this pregnancy. I was on Facebook and looking at pictures my bff had just posted of their family on vacation in Florida and all the fun they are having. And I'm super jealous because I want to go on vacation too. I'm sure I would be jealous even without the hormones because we have not been able to go on vacation in three years. We have three dogs and it costs a too much money to board them so we have not been able to go anywhere and it sucks. We can't get someone to dog sit because we have a pit bull who is a sweetheart but does not know his own strength and will knock someone down out of being happy to see them. He does not do that with us b/c we know how to handle him. Anyway, the pregnancy hormones made it worse. I want to go on vacation and be carefree and have fun for a week or so. And thus I am having a meltdown about it.
Not so much a meltdown, but I'm fuming. People need to learn to keep their eyes on the road when they're driving. Someone nearly collided with me head-on while I was on my way home from work because they drifted into my lane from opposing traffic! I had to quickly pull into the grass on the shoulder of the road to avoid getting slammed. Thankfully, I still have quick reflexes and I wasn't right next to a telephone pole, but was between two poles (total luck or a guardian angel maybe!). Grrr. Cuddling my napping baby and bumping to calm down now that I'm home.
Edited because grammar is difficult when I'm angry.
Re: GTKY: Pregnancy meltdowns:
(this was from the other night)
My mom just came and picked up the kids for them to spend TWO nights with her. All day long I was counting down to her arrival, but mostly because every 15 seconds, DS and DD were asking where she was. Why is it taking so long? Go to Jujus house! As soon as she pulled out of the drive with my babies in the back seat, my heart just sank. I wanted nothing more than for her to just pull right back in and leave them. How can I be so anxious for a break, but then be so lonely when they're not here?
My husband and I need alone time. We really do. I think it is a very vital aspect to preserving our marriage.
But at the same time, my babies not being here reminds me just how much I've lost myself to motherhood. And this is not a bad thing - totally natural and expected, probably. But sometimes I wonder if I'll ever have time to do the things I used to love. Dance. Read books. Do crafts. Paint. Being a mother is the BEST responsibility I've ever been given, but 3.5 years of being completely devoted to my kids is slowly reminding me that I need to make time for myself as well. It's a very hard balance, but maybe one day I'll figure it out.
^^ this was my emotional meltdown the other day.
Not everyone can breastfeed - Mammary Hypoplasia/Insufficient Glandular Tissue Awareness
First Pregnancy
Second Pregnancy
- BFP: 09/11/2015
- EDD: 05/25/2016
Baby Born04/15/2016
PGAL
I have had two pretty good meltdowns already:
1. After a long bedtime battle with my 13 month old, I came downstairs. My husband asked me how much fun I had (a very typical joke for us) and I told him not to start, walked over to the couch and promptly fell asleep face down in the couch.
2. While sharing the remains of an apple pie last night, I snapped at my husband about taking such big bites. He proceeded to put his fork down and sit quietly while I profusely apologized and finished the pie myself.
Conclusion: the man I married is a saint.
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
I spent the weekend camping and hiking with cereal without milk, burnt pancakes without syrup, burgers without spices, onions, or a bun, no cheese, no bread at all, no tea, and only 1 small glass of OJ to split over days, and there is more but I will spare you. NEVER AGAIN. Yeah, he went ahead and picked up the food after my mini meltdown.
Unfortunately I could only eat about two bites before I felt nauseous and gave the rest to him.
Side note: I was telling my mom about this incident earlier today. I was totally laughing about it and she told me "you need to stop acting crazy or you're gonna run him off." Which completely caught me off guard and I am still weepy/fuming from that comment.
Hormones.
Edited multiple times because words are hard
First Pregnancy
Second Pregnancy
- BFP: 09/11/2015
- EDD: 05/25/2016
Baby Born04/15/2016
PGAL
Edited because grammar is difficult when I'm angry.