March 2016 Moms

Anyone staying team green but DH finding out?

my plan had been all along to not find out the gender until March. My DH informed me the night before I was to find out my Materniti21 test results that he wanted to know the gender. We have agreed that I will have my midwife write the gender down on a paper next week at my appointment and I will give it to him. But I myself will not find out until delivery. I just really really want the surprise. Am I the only one doing this?

Re: Anyone staying team green but DH finding out?

  • Oh there's no way I could do that. DH would be bound to slip up, even if it was unintentional. Just one time saying 'he' instead of 'she' and the surprise is ruined. Six-ish more months is a long time to have such a *huge* secret between you! I think if one of you is team green you both should be.

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  • That seems impossible. I hope you guys both stick to it... But my DH would totally give it away on accident.

    3 miscarriages - 1 DS (6) - 1 DD (3)  - #3 due March 30!


  • We are also team green but neither of us are finding out. My hubby would totally slip up. Haha good luck though! I can't wait for March! Best surprise ever!
  • Yeah my husband is good, but would definitely not be able to keep that kind of secret from me, even if I wanted him to.
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  • My co-worker did this with their second child and it worked for them! Her husband found out, and she had no idea until the baby was born. She said he was really good about calling it a "He" sometimes and a "She" other times. Picking out names was the hardest, because he knew the baby was a boy, so had little interest in looking at girl names. It worked for them - I know my family wouldn't be able to handle it though! 
  • I wouldn't trust my DH to not let it slip! I think the only way it could work is if y'all agree for your DH to say he and her randomly, otherwise one little "he" and it could be given away. 
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  • My DH would never be able to keep it a secret so that wouldn't work for us.  We were team green with baby #3, which was fun.  Now with baby #4, we are ready to know NOW.  It was enjoyable to find out at the birth, but I found it to be a nice, exciting moment both ways. 
  • My husband is ridiculously good at keeping secrets, so I'd trust him to do it. We're always Team Green together though. It's a special moment when he gets to be the one to tell me if we have a boy or a girl. :)
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  • I honestly thought about it since DH was (is) desperate to find out with this one but there is NO WAY that it would work for more than like 1/2 hour he is horrendous with secrets. 
  • Here's how our secret gender went:
    We left the ultrasound knowing but planning on waiting till my sisters and parents were together (2 hours later) to tell them. I wanted to just call, but dh was adamant that we were holding out. We got to my parents and my sisters weren't there yet.
    They asked what we were having, dh said we weren't telling yet. So they asked if everything was ok and the baby was healthy.
    He said "oh yeah, and we saw her stick her hand up to her mouth and she sucked her thumb"
    I just stated at him. It took him and everyone else about 3 seconds to realize what he'd said.

    Just make sure you won't have your heart broken if he slips and spills the beans!
  • I'm friends with a couple where she knew and he didn't, and she managed to keep it a secret from him the whole time. I'm not sure what their policy on gender pronouns was. Anyway, it's possible.
    DS1 12/30/13
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  • It would never work for us. DH would slip up or I would make him tell me even if I didn't really want to know. He is horrible with secrets and I am way to impatient to not find out but if you think he can keep a secret good luck and I hope he doesn't slip up. :)


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  • My Dh would taunt me with it and intentionally have me guessing constantly. Wouldn't work for us at all
  • Girl, you crazy!
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  • ^ :)) :)) :)) :)) ^
    We have been team green 4 times now. The first time my husband REEEEEAALLY wanted to find out and I absolutely did not want to. I finally told him he could find out but he had to swear not to screw up and tell me. He said that wouldn't be any fun, so he decided not to know. With baby2 I made the offer again and he opted out. We did have the tech give us an envelope for my mom, and she knew the whole time. I was amazed that she never slipped up. She bought GN stuff, but bought some girly stuff too and stashed it away, even from my dad (who wanted the surprise). She did great; I never knew she was such a great secret keeper. She wants an envelope again this time, but since this is our last, husband says he wants everyone to be surprised. It's funny, he was always the one wanting to know, but with 3 & 4, he's been even more gung-ho about keeping the surprise than anyone. It really is an amazing moment!

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     Autism mama! 
  • My DH is a great secret keeper, so I think it will work. At this point we are giving it a try, we shall see how long it lasts.
  • A good friend of mine did this with her husband and it worked. He always used 'it' instead of he or she. She got really upset when his aunt gave her some of her hubby's childhood things thinking he told the aunt, and she was sure it was a boy. He did so well with the secret keeping she was floored when their beautiful baby girl was born. They'd been arguing over girl names previously and as a reward for being such a great secret keeper she said she backed off and they used his choice for their daughter's name.

    My hubby always wants to know from the second I find out I'm pregnant. This time he found an upside to my being of "advanced maternal age" is that the chromosome test lets us find out 8 weeks earlier than last time. We found out last night we're having another girl! Yay!
  • JessimucaJessimuca member
    edited September 2015
    My sis inlaw and her husband were team green for the first. For their second he found out and she didn't initially want to know but then after a little bit she must have had a change of heart because he surprised her with some boy stuff to tell her. I think it was really special to her, finding it from him.

    Edited for spelling because words are hard.
  • My husband didn't want to know until the birth, this is our first, and I am a planner and can't NOT know. So we compromised and I'm going to find out and then bake him a gender revealing cheesecake to surprise him. Chocolate raspberry if it's a girl and blueberry if it's a boy!
  • I need to know and my partner does not. He's not willing to have me keep it a secret though so I guess he's goingto have to roll with finding out because I need to know who's making me feel so sick! (Also, if it's not another daughter I need some mental prep time.). We get some veto power for having to deal with all the symptoms right!?!
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