We are not. I have told hubby not to, as sometimes he is known for blurting things out without thinking. We aren't really actively TTC yet, but we have just begun not using BC, and are seeing if it happens without putting any "pressure" on ourselves.
I am not telling, because I suffered a Miscarriage with my 1st pregnancy, and am terrified of something happening again. I didn't even tell people until I was almost 5 months along with my son (we conceived shortly after MC) because I was so afraid of having to then tell everyone we suffered a loss. It's intrusive and frustrating when people ask now, never mind if you are TTC and having difficulty, or God forbid suffer a loss. That would make an awful experience even more painful to constantly have to answer questions about it.
We have a three year old, so we get the question a lot if we are having another, or people saying DS needs a sibling. I am a private person by natue, so we always just say "we don't know" or "we'll see". We have one persistent friend who is always telling us we need to have another, so I've begun asking "Are you planning on financing and feeding said child?" when they ask. It usually shuts them up for the moment. lol
I would like to tell people. But I think with my crazy family we will keep it private until it's confirmed I'm pregnant. They can sometimes be too negative about things and I don't want to let that get me down because I know I'm happy planning and I'll be happy when the test is positive
We are keeping our TTC journey pretty quiet. We both told our absolute closest friends. But nobody else. I don't want the pressure of people asking me if I'm pregnant every other second. I also want it to be a surprise when we tell our families.
My closest friend knows we are trying and one of my family members knows that we will start trying in the next few years but that's all. I don't want to get asked questions everytime I See my mom or mil.
TTC #1 since August 2015 BFP #1 January 28, 2016
EDD October 3, 2016 Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016 My Chart
TTC #2 Since August 2020 BFP #2 September 11, 2020 EDD May 23, 2021
I'm keeping it private except for my mom, sister, and my small group of girlfriends. I don't want everyone to ask me about it until I'm ready to talk about it, but I want the ladies closest to me to know what's going on in case I should need support. Other than that, DH doesn't really talk about that kind of thing. However, all the ladies at his work asked... and he told them! Which cracked me up. It really is surprising how invasive some people can be with questions. We dated for 10 years, but only married this past June. The second we were married, people starting asking!
I'm keeping it private except for my mom, sister, and my small group of girlfriends. I don't want everyone to ask me about it until I'm ready to talk about it, but I want the ladies closest to me to know what's going on in case I should need support. Other than that, DH doesn't really talk about that kind of thing. However, all the ladies at his work asked... and he told them! Which cracked me up. It really is surprising how invasive some people can be with questions. We dated for 10 years, but only married this past June. The second we were married, people starting asking!
We were dating for 9 years and got married this past June as well! Congratulations!!
Both our parents know but that's because I have kidney issues and had to go to the dr to get clearance to start trying so that appointment was worrisome. My sisters found out because I bought ovulation tests on my Amazon account and they saw it (and made fun of me no less) so then my Aunt found out. But we aren't telling anyone else and I wish my sisters and Aunt didn't know honestly.
My sister got pregnant the FIRST try with both children and I'm about 4 years younger than she was when she started trying.
I thought I would be the same for me and told a lot of people. I was just so excited I couldn't keep my mouth shut. HUGE MISTAKE!! Keep it to yourself or only your closest friends/family.
I feel much more pressure than I think I would have otherwise.
I've been casually talking to several of sisters about the fact my hubby and I might start trying, but haven't come out to say "yes we're trying now". I'm also a vet tech and I did approach my head technician to discuss some safety concerns I had and how to go about changing the way I work in different situations to make sure I'm safe. The rumor got out however, so several people at work know it's a possibility...I don't really mind people knowing, as I'm pretty close with the gals I work with, however I wouldn't want just anyone to know, and I've asked DH to not mention it to his coworkers or the neighbors etc.
Nope. Not telling anyone. We are all adults but it's still awkward talking about that stuff to other people. It is basically saying yes, we are having lots of unprotected sex. Lots!!!
My brother and i are complete opposites. I remember when my brother and his wife were TTC. He literally called me the day of my wedding to tell me he and his wife would be late because she is ovulating. Then he later proceeded to tell me that they were worried because she didn't have egg white cervical mucous. Seriously, it was a little weird. I'm very quiet and private. He on the other hand probably has the entire thing filmed to show how their now daughter was conceived. Not to mention he shaved his chest so he could do "kangaroo care." I basically told him his chest looks like a cactus. End rant :-)
I just think that stuff is private and between husband and wife.
My plan is to not tell anyone until baby is born. Let them figure it out for themselves. I love that awkward "Kayla looks pregnant but she hasn't said anything, should I or shouldn't I ask?" Ha-ha.
For me it's better to keep private simply because I can't deal with the constant questions from family and friends for updates. IVF is already stressful and answering hundreds of questions gives me anxiety lol. But that's just me.
TTC for Baby #1 for 3 years. After 2 failed IUI's & IVFs, God blessed us with our miracle . FET 12/17/15 (transferred 2 embryos at 5days). First Beta 12/29/15 = 354. Second Beta 12/31/15 = 694. Third Beta 1/7/16 = 6,695. Finally heard his heartbeat (126) on 1/14/16 @ our 1st US. 2nd US on 1/21/16, HR was 159. The most beautiful sound ever
I'm keeping it private except for my mom, sister, and my small group of girlfriends. I don't want everyone to ask me about it until I'm ready to talk about it, but I want the ladies closest to me to know what's going on in case I should need support. Other than that, DH doesn't really talk about that kind of thing. However, all the ladies at his work asked... and he told them! Which cracked me up. It really is surprising how invasive some people can be with questions. We dated for 10 years, but only married this past June. The second we were married, people starting asking!
We were dating for 9 years and got married this past June as well! Congratulations!!
So funny! Congrats! I can't believe how fast it all goes.
Private for sure. I had to change my profile picture on here because I found my SILs good friend on the boards. I didn't want her to find me and next thing I know, my sister and law knows then the whole family!
@RachelT1234 I switched usernames from my last stint on TB, because I'm worried ladies on my old BMB will find and recognize me. We are all a great group of friends and still talk to a lot on the daily on FB. I'm keeping this hush.
I decided to tell my sister and my best friends, both of them are more than just a sister and just a friend. My sister and I have been talking about planning ahead for TTCing for two years so I feel like she's my buddy in all the anticipation. And my best friend has an 18 month old (my goddaughter). So she is a good resource of what it's like. Though she got pregnant on the first try. All I said was that I stopped BC. But both know me well and know I will update them when there's news. DH weirdly enough said he has mentioned it to a few coworkers. Weird because he's not particularly close to any of them. But he said that all have kids and thus can relate and give him advice... I would love to hear these conversations happening at work, haha. I'm so excited I want to announce it to everyone but it does feel private and I would hate the constant questions.
@EQKarli88 that story made me laugh! Your brother talking about EWCM!! I agree that it's weird to hear people say they're trying, all I think is "great you've just told me you're having unprotected sex monthly...awkward" I feel it's odd to announce that.
My husband and I got pregnant in June and before our first appointment he says "hey! I talked to my mom yesterday for 47 minutes, and I didn't tell her that we're having a baby. Do you know how hard it was to talk about everything but that for 47 MINUTES?!?! We've got to tell her today or I'm going to burst!" It tickled me a bit! Unforunately we miscarried a few weeks later. So now we're keeping ALL news (that we're trying and that we're expecting) to ourselves!
Me and DH are keeping it private, i'm a private person but DH is from a Spanish family aka everyone knows everyone's everything. To me it's a personal decision and it's nobody's business. I will tell my mom when i'm pregnant because it's my mom and this is my first child.
We're gonna keep it private too. Maybe one really close friend who was pregnant last year, depends on how I'll feel during TTC.
My BIL has 3 kids and every time when the news came out they where expecting he and my in laws where asking us when we would start untill the kid was a couple of months old (the first kid was born when we where dating for 1 year and didn't even think of moving in together!)
Since we started living together 5 years ago I've been pregnant a couple of times if I should believe them. I had a burnout=pregnant, couple of years later naseous because of lactose intolerance=pregnant, gaining a bit of weight=pregnant, bf had a job interview (only had to work at fri, sat, sun)=pregnant. And it was very painfull sometimes since I did wanted to have kids, but my bf wanted to wait.
Would be even worse if they know when we start TTC and we don't get pregnant right away. Don't need the questions or well intended advice.
We have not started TTC. When we do start, we will likely keep it private. Even when people ask when we will have children, I just say, "one day" or "in a few years." Our plan is to start TTC in the next 1 to 1 1/2 years, but we don't want to tell anyone that.
My FH doesn't want anyone to know, and I agree with him. This is something we are going to keep just between us. I don't want people asking me how it is going, etc. especially if we have difficulty TTC. My Mom has a hint (well more than a hint) that we are going to start TTC sometime in the future. I asked her a couple of questions about her experience, but I was not forthcoming with exactly when we are going to start trying. Just told her that since my FH and I were starting to discuss children, I had a few questions for her about her experience with TTC. I'm really hoping that it doesn't take long, but I am nervous that it will take awhile.
I've only told one of my closest friends that we're about to start trying, definitely don't plan on telling family. I want them to be completely surprised when we (hopefully) get pregnant! However, a few coworkers noticed steristrips on my inner arm the day after I had my nexplanon removed. Since they're healthcare workers on a labor & delivery unit, they put it together right away! I just told them "maybe!" and to keep it quiet.
My husband and I got pregnant in June and before our first appointment he says "hey! I talked to my mom yesterday for 47 minutes, and I didn't tell her that we're having a baby. Do you know how hard it was to talk about everything but that for 47 MINUTES?!?! We've got to tell her today or I'm going to burst!" It tickled me a bit! Unforunately we miscarried a few weeks later. So now we're keeping ALL news (that we're trying and that we're expecting) to ourselves!
LOL. this is really cute/funny. sounds like something i would say. lol. i'm sorry to hear about your loss. good thoughts are with y'all and good luck if you're trying/when you start trying again. this is one of the main reasons why i am choosing to keep our TTC private. i feel like, for me, it would be so much harder to deal with a miscarriage if i was being bombarded with questions all the time. i'd rather just deal with all that in private. but that's just me. i know some people need outside support from family. to each their own.
DH weirdly enough said he has mentioned it to a few coworkers. Weird because he's not particularly close to any of them. But he said that all have kids and thus can relate and give him advice... I would love to hear these conversations happening at work, haha.
LOL! i can't imagine how the conversations would sound if DH discussed our TTC with his coworkers. that's something i'd DEFINITELY want to be a fly on the wall for. too funny.
houston, tx. eharmony 7.3.11. married 3.7.15. oilfield wife.
My husband and I have decided to keep it quiet that we are TTC. I think it would freak my Dad out (still sees me as his little girl) and I don't want the pressure of it. It has been hard at times though not to tell people. My SIL asked me if we were planning on being pregnant at her wedding which is July 2016.....and I told her no :S We have decided if we do not get pregnant after 6-8 months we will probably start talking to our families about it. One person does know about it and that is my best friend and MOH who lives in the UK (I live in Canada). We agreed to tell her so that I had someone to vent to and talk about everything with. My husband talks to his guy friends at work who have recently had children. I think it is important to have a TTC outlet somewhere.
We kept it a secret for a whole week! lol. My DH and I are so excited we couldn't keep it from our families. I told my co-workers because I am a planner and I wanted to know what to expect with my insurance, and what maternity leave I would have.
Part of me regrets it because I realize it may take a while and I will have people asking every month if I am pregnant or not. But it's awesome to have a support group as well!
I'm concerned about my family being upset with us for not telling them that we are TTC. DH and I have been married for a year now, and the timing to start a family is perfect for us. However, we have a very large family and I am not ready to hear everyone's opinion and advice about our decision. I think we are going to hold off on telling them anything until we are actually pregnant.
DH weirdly enough said he has mentioned it to a few coworkers. Weird because he's not particularly close to any of them. But he said that all have kids and thus can relate and give him advice... I would love to hear these conversations happening at work, haha.
LOL! i can't imagine how the conversations would sound if DH discussed our TTC with his coworkers. that's something i'd DEFINITELY want to be a fly on the wall for. too funny.
First, sorry for the delayed replied. I didn't realize I could check notifications, oops.
And I agree, I was SO surprised when he told me. I'm pretty sure my face got really funky while I was trying to imagine the conversation. It's just not the type of conversation I ever expected to hear in that boring, predictable, monotonous office environment where he works. And of course in typical guy fashion, I asked him what exactly was said in the conversation, and he was just like "dunno, just that" and he shrugged. WTF!
@BVBabyHopeful LOL. Guys are so lame when it comes to recalling conversation. Us girls, we want the juice. Guys are just like, doh. C'mon man! I guess we can only imagine... Haha.
houston, tx. eharmony 7.3.11. married 3.7.15. oilfield wife.
When we start TTC, we'll probably keep it really quiet. SO is close to his parents but we're both really private so I doubt anyone will know beore we announce a pregnancy.
Nope, we don't even plan to tell anyone I'm pregnant until 12 or 13 weeks, let alone telling them there a possibility it'll be happening in the near future. Too weird to know that people know what we're up to in the privacy of our home.
No one! Absolutely no one. I feel it is something between husband and wife. Plus, if we do have trouble I couldn't deal with the constant questions. I'd rather it just be... Hey surprise! And not to mention going into labor, don't think I'll tell anyone. It will just be a "hey surprise. Don't ask questions about anything just be happy."
I might tell my closest girlfriends, because they told me when they were TTC/may also be TTC soon. If it ends up taking a long time, I feel like I will definitely need to vent to someone about it! I would definitely NOT tell any family members though...I would much rather just surprise them and not have them waiting. I love all my coworkers, but I would not tell them anything until I knew for sure. I feel like if you tell people you're TTC they are just looking for signs of it all the time!
We are not planning on telling anyone until I'm actually pregnant. To me it is very personal. I will probably tell my mother and sister early on, but the rest of the world will have to wait until after the 12 week mark.
Maybe just to spice it up, I'll admit that I've already started to share with my closest family and a few friends that I would like to TTC ... Totally respect that so many ladies are keeping it private. I admire your ability to keep this to yourselves!
I've told my family and a few close friends (two happen to be coworkers, but I consider them friends beyond work) that we are hoping to start TTC in the next year. I haven't provided any details, but I'm just so excited about it, I can't keep it to myself.
Plus, with my family especially, I wanted to talk to them about how it could affect annual visits, any input they have on how to approach this big decision financially, etc. I guess I want the support. My husband doesn't mind that I want to talk about our plans with those closest to us since he knows that I'm a social person and that I like to feel the support of people I love. I also don't tend to befriend people that aren't really private so I know that the few people I've shared this with aren't going to gossip or speak out of turn about it to others. They're going to give me advice, support and leave it at that!
And because I'm not getting into any nitty gritty details about timing or any other elements, just saying something like, we'd like to start a family in the next year or two (or a little more specific with my mom) I don't think they'll watch my every move to see if I'm PG. Mostly I think they're just excited to see what happens.
Some our closest friends know our timeline. They know we are planning to start TTC in January. While we haven't told our parents, they all know that we want kids soon-ish so we just w on't tell them until we're actually pregnant and far enough along.
It's exciting for our friends to have an idea because I like being able to share it with people and them being excited and happy for us. My BFF and he long time BF will hopefully be engaged soon and she really wants a fall 2016 wedding. I keep having dreams that I am super pregnant at her wedding! I told her about it and now she keeps saying that she just expects it! HAHA.
We told a few close friends (Dh seems to be more willing to share than I am!), but otherwise keeping it quiet. I still get a lot of "Are you pregnant yet?" questions even from people who don't know we're trying because friends/family know we want kids (and after you get married, everyone assumes that is the next step). So, sometimes I wonder if people would ask LESS if they knew we were trying. Because it is kind of painful to have to answer that question when you have been trying, just no luck yet.
Married May 2014 DD born August 2016 Baby #2 due December 2017
Re: Are you telling people you're TTC or keeping it private?
We are not. I have told hubby not to, as sometimes he is known for blurting things out without thinking. We aren't really actively TTC yet, but we have just begun not using BC, and are seeing if it happens without putting any "pressure" on ourselves.
I am not telling, because I suffered a Miscarriage with my 1st pregnancy, and am terrified of something happening again. I didn't even tell people until I was almost 5 months along with my son (we conceived shortly after MC) because I was so afraid of having to then tell everyone we suffered a loss. It's intrusive and frustrating when people ask now, never mind if you are TTC and having difficulty, or God forbid suffer a loss. That would make an awful experience even more painful to constantly have to answer questions about it.
We have a three year old, so we get the question a lot if we are having another, or people saying DS needs a sibling. I am a private person by natue, so we always just say "we don't know" or "we'll see". We have one persistent friend who is always telling us we need to have another, so I've begun asking "Are you planning on financing and feeding said child?" when they ask. It usually shuts them up for the moment. lol
See my mom or mil.
BFP #1 January 28, 2016
Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016
My Chart
BFP #2 September 11, 2020
EDD May 23, 2021
I thought I would be the same for me and told a lot of people. I was just so excited I couldn't keep my mouth shut. HUGE MISTAKE!! Keep it to yourself or only your closest friends/family.
I feel much more pressure than I think I would have otherwise.
Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
My brother and i are complete opposites. I remember when my brother and his wife were TTC. He literally called me the day of my wedding to tell me he and his wife would be late because she is ovulating. Then he later proceeded to tell me that they were worried because she didn't have egg white cervical mucous. Seriously, it was a little weird. I'm very quiet and private. He on the other hand probably has the entire thing filmed to show how their now daughter was conceived. Not to mention he shaved his chest so he could do "kangaroo care." I basically told him his chest looks like a cactus. End rant :-)
I just think that stuff is private and between husband and wife.
All I said was that I stopped BC. But both know me well and know I will update them when there's news.
DH weirdly enough said he has mentioned it to a few coworkers. Weird because he's not particularly close to any of them. But he said that all have kids and thus can relate and give him advice... I would love to hear these conversations happening at work, haha.
I'm so excited I want to announce it to everyone but it does feel private and I would hate the constant questions.
I agree that it's weird to hear people say they're trying, all I think is "great you've just told me you're having unprotected sex monthly...awkward"
I feel it's odd to announce that.
Part of me regrets it because I realize it may take a while and I will have people asking every month if I am pregnant or not. But it's awesome
to have a support group as well!
It's a boy!
Dating: 10/3/08 | Married: 12/27/14
TTC #1: August 2015 | BFP: 2/3/16 | EDD: 10/7/16
DD: 10/5/16
TTC #2: September 2017 | BFP: 4/28/18 | EDD: 1/7/19
DS: 1/9/19
Married May 2014
DD born August 2016
Baby #2 due December 2017