BOY OH BOY Congrats on finding out the gender!! I felt like I was the only one ever having a boy!!
You are coming to the end of your midwifery training yes? I can imagine it is a min trip as you watch other women going through it your analytical mind is trying to apply all of this knowledge to your circumstances and when it doesn't align you may feel like there is something off in yours. If I am close in this, you are not alone. I look at all the women in my FB pregnancy groups and wondering how they are finding such good deals on cribs and how are they showing already and those that have lost 50 pounds in the pregnancy ... don't even get me started on those! haha
Just stay in tune with your body and that sweet little boy in there and find peace in the mental and physical chaos you may be feeling right now.
I am already getting sad that we only want two kids and Tara will have our second and so ... this is the only time in my life I will be pregnant I love being pregnant. It is nothing and everything I thought it would be all at once. We found out our good friends are expecting and she is a month behind me. I am excited to have a friend in our circle on our same path so we won't be the only ones with a baby, therefore potentially getting excluded from all the "cool" hangs our friends will have.
Hello strangers! I've been MIA on this thread for a while but decided it's time to come back on board! Congrats on the baby boy's jambrown and tgrdance! (I've already said congrats to purejoy ). Wow -lotsa new little boys soon to be in the world! We're still holding off on finding out but it's hard! I have a feeling ours is a boy too though . In other news, my partner is overseas for 6 weeks for work so I'm flying solo for a bit (luckily I have a dog for company). Thankfully I'm not feeling as sick these days so I'm hoping time will pass quickly and I won't resort to eating too much crap because I'm too lazy to cook for myself! Anyway, hope all's well for you all. Have a lovely week
Bisho are you waiting until the end to find out the gender? We are working hard to get the nursery set up and excited that is 2 weeks we will be half way through. I just want January here already so we can meet our son.
Hey jambrown...yeah we're going to wait until the birth. My partner will be delivering him/her (with midwife assistance of course!) and will be the first to know the sex...and then tell me I suppose! (Although I'll know once I see him/her too). We have lotsa different coloured clothes we've been given- e.g. blue, pink, grey, yellow etc! We figure our baby won't be too fazed by whatever colour it's wearing! ;p That's exciting re: nursery prep! We're not really going to have a nursery as such as we only have one spare room (with a guest bed). Some baby stuff will be in there too, but baby will sleep in our room for a while. Eventually we'll have to get rid of the spare bed and make it a baby's room I suppose! Yeah nearly half-way mark...exciting times! (I'm only 17.2 so a little behind you). Will be good to see baby again at the 20-week scan. It's a shame my partner will be overseas for this but it's okay, I'll take a good friend instead .
@dpurejoy yes you're totally right. I've had to learn to be the patient in this experience which has definitely been a challenge. My wife is also a nurse so we literally try and diagnose everything...which is exhausting!! We made vow last month that we would stop worrying and just enjoy the pregnancy...which we have been doing now. I'm right there with you...I love pregnancy as well!! I've never wanted something to hurry up and not end all at the same time. It's funny bc now that we no we are having a boy, it makes it that much more exciting for him to come...like I can envision his little face and what we will be like...so in love ❤️❤️
@Bisho that sucks that your partner is over seas! Ugh...I'm such a whiny baby lately that I don't know if I could survive 6 weeks of this pregnancy without my wife!! My pregnancy hormones have def got the best of me .
@jambrown1516 That's so great that yall have the nursery together already!! Omg we haven't even started! And my mom wants us to register this week!! I don't even know where to begin!!
Wow @Bisho, that is pretty good. I definitely could not wait until January. I am a big planner, so yes we are already working gone the nursery. He will most likely sleep in here also in the beginning, but this way when we are ready, he has a place to go. I put together the crib a few weekends ago and some small furniture is in, but that is all for now. I am getting estimates for wainscot and will paint also. I am sure you have all heard of Babylist, but there is where I started our registry because that way we can put anything from any store, including on line. Plus you can also order cards that say that is where you are registered for free. I am kind of excited about that too. I am not done with the registry, but have started it. (My anxiety again). Attached baby's room and paint colors. Anyone like a particular color?
jambrown1516 I wish we registered that way ... we registered at Babies 'R Us and USA Baby and I feel like people are going to use one or the other and we are going to miss stuff. Our nursery furniture we ordered 3.5 weeks ago and it could possibly get here when my mom is in town visiting for the anatomy scan ultrasound. I hope it does arrive then so she can be a part of it all coming together!!
Just got back from my second day care center tour ... why is it so darn expensive!?!?! This whole thing is so stressful. I feel like he isn't even here and I am behind in life. We met with our life insurance agent Monday night and talked about life insurance for the baby. My friend asked if we have a pediatrician yet ... a pediatrician??? He isn't even born yet!? ugh! So many decisions to make!?!?!?
@tgrdance05. Thanks for your suggestion. That is the color we have chosen. I will start painting soon. Don't worry you have time. It makes me feel better to keep busy with baby stuff. @dpurejoy, so much to think about. How much were the day care centers you looked out? We are looking to do a nanny for a few years anyways.
Yeah some of you are ahead of the game re: getting ready for baby! Good for you . It's not that we're not excited but we're both so relaxed and figure it'll all come together in good time. That being said, I know it can't hurt to start looking at eBay etc to get some second-hand stuff (it's often hardly even used!). We're not doing a registry or having a shower or anything. We're just gonna keep things simple and find little treasures etc from Op shops (think you call them thrift shops in the states?!)...there's so much good/barely used stuff out there! The only time we'll buy things new is when it's related to safety - e.g. Car seats etc. I've also been thinking about other ways to reduce consumerism and instill this value in our kids..like giving our child 'experiences' rather than 'things' all the time...e.g. A birthday present may be a trip to the circus or whatever...and then take some pics etc and make a scrapbook of each birthday experience. I dunno. But I always think about how I can keep doing my bit to tread lightly on the earth, and help teach my kids to do the same. I feel like it's a big responsibility to bring more people onto our little planet. I really hope we can keep making it better for future generations. Sorry- p
I love those ideas @Bisho! I totally want to have as little stuff as possible for this baby. We need to get a crib, and we're making some stuff, but mostly we're using hand me downs people gave us.
Married DW 08.2013; AI 2x; IUI 6x; IUI #7 05.2015; DD born 2.2016 ; Reciprocal IVF FET #1 on 11.18.2020
jambrown1516 ... around here childcare will range from $1000/month to $1400 (and up!). We were thinking of nannying but even a nanny at $10/hour for 40/week would be about $1700/month ... We are trying to stay under $1100/month. We have 3 tours scheduled and I am hoping something feels right and is affordable for us!!
@jambrown1516 ... how was the birthday and gender scan??? Did you find out what you are having??
In other news ... I found out yesterday that my dad is entering hospice care for end of life. I am going to have my last visit with him in a week and a half ... I hate that I am in the middle of my first pregnancy (will be 20 weeks when I go see him) and I am having to endure the family emotional strain and loss of my father.
He is sick with some infections and I will be in a gown, gloves and mask to protect me and the baby but I am still nervous as to how it will all pan out. I am going up for almost a week.
How do I protect my little boy from my emotional roller coaster? I need to make sure i keep eating, walking when i can and getting plenty of sleep to offset my sad heart and mind. Does he feel my feelings?
I am thankful that I will have the ultrasound pics from my 19.5 week anatomy scan to show him!! My little boy will never get to meet his grandpa ... so much to process. I didn't see this coming.
Yeah me too dpurejoy...really sorry you have to go through this at this particular point in time. Your little boy will be okay...he's well insulated in there - physically and emotionally . Let yourself feel what you need to feel as this is surely better than trying to hold it all in for baby's sake? But as you say, it's important to keep taking good care of yourself. Life will always keep making waves for us so I guess we just have to keep surfing them . Sending you lots of whatever you need to help you through x
thanks guys ... I have booked flights to go home to support my mom and visit with my dad. My mom already has me signed up to sing with the music therapist the day we get there when she has her session with my dad. I am taking each day as it comes. Almost anything can make me cry or not so I do let it comes when it comes.
I have been slacking touching base with this group. I found my work productivity was slacking most days because I would log on to all my mommy blogs and write more to you ladies than accomplish my work, so I laid low for a little while
I had check-in appointment yesterday and all is normal, healthy, well ... she said this is the one time in life it is really good to be "boring" Have you all found out gender? Done any reveals? We finally shared the gender with friends and told them his name - Silas Monroe ... our little man, I can't WAIT for him to get here already!?!?
Our nursery furniture arrived yesterday and we set up the nursery a little ... how is everyone feeling? doing? all well with everyone? Are any of you in the Facebook groups - Due in January 2016, January 2016 Babies or January 2016 Moms?
Super cute crib! I'm doing pretty well, just kinda tired and wish I didn't have to work all the time. Mostly feeling better than the first trimester except for heartburn, but I'd take that over MS any day! How are you? I hope you got to enjoy some of your time with your dad since we last heard from you. I'm not in the FB groups. I might join after the baby comes.
Married DW 08.2013; AI 2x; IUI 6x; IUI #7 05.2015; DD born 2.2016 ; Reciprocal IVF FET #1 on 11.18.2020
I don't ever get on here anymore due to the cattiness on the threads. But I happened to get on today since I'm 22 weeks and having some bad left flank pain. I thought I would check to see if anyone has posted anything similar to my symptoms. My OB says it could be anything from stones, to muscle strain, to pressure on my ureters from my growing uterus! It's not debilitating, just uncomfortable.
Anywho....I feel this little boy moving ALL THE TIME! It's the most wonderful and amazing feeling on the planet.,.im so in love.
@dpurejoy I'm so sorry about your dad. I hope you are doing well and taking good care of yourself. The nursery is beautiful! And I LOVE the name Silas. We are just getting our nursery together as well. We painted last week. I will post pics for yall when it is finished.
We announced our baby name: Jett William (both family names from my dads side)
We had our 20w ultrasound last Thursday and found out that we're having a boy too! I heard that it was more probable to have a boy with IUI is that what you all have heard? Boy sperm being faster swimmers? Well its encouraging that there will be a whole generation of men raised in matriarchal systems. But really I'm excited to have a son!
Another aspect of my pregnancy that has been interesting is the fact that I'm the more masculine presenting partner carrying our first baby. I will say that since popping at 20 weeks I tend to look more like a fat guy I'm sure that will only get more interesting. The female curves and more female body is a little dysphoric but it all feels worth it to feel this little guy kicking and moving. I'm excited to have my genes in our family.
Last thought- we have lots of friends that identify as gender variant and trans and we've been working through the idea of gendering our kiddo. We've tried to buy gender neutral clothes and we're definitely going to put our boy in some cool pink stuff (minus all the ruffles). We have friends raising their kids with gender neutral pronouns until the kid starts to communicate who they are. We're not so sure about the neutral pronouns but we're trying to provide lots of space to respond to what the kid starts to tell us they are.
Congrats on your baby boy! I don't think it's true that IUI itself causes more boys, or at least I certainly can't find any reputable study that states this. Most of the other ladies here did IVF or AI. I'm also an IUI'er. Not sure what I'm having yet though.
I've definitely given thought to the gender variance stuff as you mentioned. I will probably dress my kid in both gender neutral clothes and not, but mostly I want to give them space to express themselves as they see fit. I won't be using gender neutral pronouns unless my child asks me to. I guess I don't want to overly complicate things on the off chance they are gender variant.
Married DW 08.2013; AI 2x; IUI 6x; IUI #7 05.2015; DD born 2.2016 ; Reciprocal IVF FET #1 on 11.18.2020
@claireloSC thanks ... the nursery is coming along so well!! Good to hear you are doing well despite a busy work schedule. I am very lucky that my job is pretty easy to do, I sit at a desk as a graphic designer all day. Time with the family was good. I was just thinking this morning how we are all just watching the clock and seeing how he takes these last few months. I won't fully grasp it all until he's gone. The last thing he said as i was walking out of his nursing home room was, when will I see you next, and while holding back tears i said, with Silas on the way, we won't be back home until he is strong enough to fly, next Spring. I can't think about it too much or I will lose it again.
tgrdance05 I too am feeling him more and more ... it is SO amazing. As I sit here at work and he nudges me in some way I talk to him and tell him I feel him, that I know he's in there Good luck with the nursery ... my friends told us to slow down so they had stuff to get us. I am not that kind of person, I need things in place. I have a hard time trusting on others to bring my dreams and plans into fruition ha. I love the name Jett William, looks like you put lots of thought into it. There are some moms on the FB groups I follow and the names they are sharing are Uh-MAY-ZING ... ly out there and I wonder how long they took to select them lol oh well, to each his own!
mrockensock congrats on the boy!! We too heard that the chances of a boy are 60% when having an IUI because of how the male sperm swim faster and by doing IUI, you have removed all the obstacles to getting to the egg so they have a straight shot How are others taking you as pregnant? Is it effecting your self-perception at all or demeanor? My wife and I are both femme and I have loved every second of being pregnant. She will try in a few years with the same donor sperm so the kids are genetically tied!
We "finished" the nursery this weekend (see attached pics). The theme is adventure, safari, explore ... Not really sure of an actual theme but it is a conglomerate of all the things that spoke to us!
Also, we hit up Goodwill once a month to stock up on baby clothes ... Tara LOVES hunting for things for our little guy I was there looking for long shirts that don't roll up my belly and for maternity pants. I got one pair of pants and a few tops!
Hi ladies, my mom got me this great book called "On becoming babywise". It's about infant sleep wake and feeding cycles. So far I really love the advice it gives, and if you read the testimonials, women swear by it. They say their babies were sleeping through the night by 6 weeks! Just wanted to share with you
I am having too much fun being pregnant, I don't want to think ahead to sleep patterns yet lol but when i do, I should probably read this! Thanks for sharing!!
welcome and congratulations ... how have you been feeling? were twins a surprise?? I just hit 30 weeks today with my little baby boy, Silas Monroe and I can't wait for him to get here!! I am carrying our first after one IUI attempt. Life is going to change for the better forever once he gets here!!
I know a few twin parents that love Babywise but it was NOT our thing. I loved the Healthy Sleep Habits book though. We kept a loose schedule and were very strict about one up both up.
@claireloSC we are doing great! I can't believe our little guy is already 6 weeks...time is flying by. I'm not going to lie, it's been a rough transition and definitely exhausting, but also exciting, exhilarating, fun, and the best time of my life at the same time
some me same sex mom problems: people only referring to me as his mom, coming up to me asking me about the baby, congratulating me etc. Its been very lonely for my wife who feels completely left out. Especially since I'm exclusively breast feeding, I spend the majority of the time with our son at the moment. I let her do some night feeds so that i can get a stretch of sleep here and there. She's awesome though, she doesn't ever complain and has been so super supportive.
Are there any thing specifically y'all are doing to include your wives with your LOs? We had our first date without Jett on Valentine's Day which was special but we missed him so much smile:
Besides a couple of confusing times, people have been great here about referring to DW as the other parent. Lots of people have accidentally said stuff about the baby having traits inherited from DW too even though she didn't carry the baby. So I think people really think of her as both of ours. Granted we live in California, so it's a bit more open here. @tgrdance05 - Our LO is only 9 days old so we are still adjusting and trying to get a routine going. It's been hard but also it's pretty cool to hang out with our daughter! Glad things are going well for you three.
Married DW 08.2013; AI 2x; IUI 6x; IUI #7 05.2015; DD born 2.2016 ; Reciprocal IVF FET #1 on 11.18.2020
Re: Any other same-sex moms on here?
Congrats on the baby boy's jambrown and tgrdance! (I've already said congrats to purejoy
In other news, my partner is overseas for 6 weeks for work so I'm flying solo for a bit (luckily I have a dog for company). Thankfully I'm not feeling as sick these days so I'm hoping time will pass quickly and I won't resort to eating too much crap because I'm too lazy to cook for myself!
Anyway, hope all's well for you all. Have a lovely week
That's exciting re: nursery prep! We're not really going to have a nursery as such as we only have one spare room (with a guest bed). Some baby stuff will be in there too, but baby will sleep in our room for a while. Eventually we'll have to get rid of the spare bed and make it a baby's room I suppose!
Yeah nearly half-way mark...exciting times! (I'm only 17.2 so a little behind you). Will be good to see baby again at the 20-week scan. It's a shame my partner will be overseas for this but it's okay, I'll take a good friend instead
@dpurejoy yes you're totally right. I've had to learn to be the patient in this experience which has definitely been a challenge. My wife is also a nurse so we literally try and diagnose everything...which is exhausting!! We made vow last month that we would stop worrying and just enjoy the pregnancy...which we have been doing now. I'm right there with you...I love pregnancy as well!! I've never wanted something to hurry up and not end all at the same time. It's funny bc now that we no we are having a boy, it makes it that much more exciting for him to come...like I can envision his little face and what we will be like...so in love ❤️❤️
@Bisho that sucks that your partner is over seas! Ugh...I'm such a whiny baby lately that I don't know if I could survive 6 weeks of this pregnancy without my wife!! My pregnancy hormones have def got the best of me
@jambrown1516 That's so great that yall have the nursery together already!! Omg we haven't even started! And my mom wants us to register this week!! I don't even know where to begin!!
Holy crap I need to get with it!!
Sorry- p
@jambrown1516 ... how was the birthday and gender scan??? Did you find out what you are having??
In other news ... I found out yesterday that my dad is entering hospice care for end of life. I am going to have my last visit with him in a week and a half ... I hate that I am in the middle of my first pregnancy (will be 20 weeks when I go see him) and I am having to endure the family emotional strain and loss of my father.
He is sick with some infections and I will be in a gown, gloves and mask to protect me and the baby but I am still nervous as to how it will all pan out. I am going up for almost a week.
How do I protect my little boy from my emotional roller coaster? I need to make sure i keep eating, walking when i can and getting plenty of sleep to offset my sad heart and mind. Does he feel my feelings?
I am thankful that I will have the ultrasound pics from my 19.5 week anatomy scan to show him!! My little boy will never get to meet his grandpa ... so much to process. I didn't see this coming.
I had check-in appointment yesterday and all is normal, healthy, well ... she said this is the one time in life it is really good to be "boring"
I don't ever get on here anymore due to the cattiness on the threads. But I happened to get on today since I'm 22 weeks and having some bad left flank pain. I thought I would check to see if anyone has posted anything similar to my symptoms. My OB says it could be anything from stones, to muscle strain, to pressure on my ureters from my growing uterus! It's not debilitating, just uncomfortable.
Anywho....I feel this little boy moving ALL THE TIME! It's the most wonderful and amazing feeling on the planet.,.im so in love.
@dpurejoy I'm so sorry about your dad. I hope you are doing well and taking good care of yourself. The nursery is beautiful! And I LOVE the name Silas. We are just getting our nursery together as well. We painted last week. I will post pics for yall when it is finished.
We announced our baby name: Jett William (both family names from my dads side)
We are getting more and more excited to meet him
some me same sex mom problems: people only referring to me as his mom, coming up to me asking me about the baby, congratulating me etc. Its been very lonely for my wife who feels completely left out. Especially since I'm exclusively breast feeding, I spend the majority of the time with our son at the moment. I let her do some night feeds so that i can get a stretch of sleep here and there. She's awesome though, she doesn't ever complain and has been so super supportive.
Are there any thing specifically y'all are doing to include your wives with your LOs? We had our first date without Jett on Valentine's Day which was special but we missed him so much smile:
hope pe all is going well with you all!