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Finally willing to admit defeat!

girl2902girl2902 member
in Trying to Get Pregnant
I've been exploring this site for a long time. I always thought that not getting pregnant would never happen to me. I am surrounded by kids. I love them and want one as my own. I always told myself that I would have a baby once I got settled. I was settled in life and 25. No baby. I have been irregular since middle school. Everyone always told me it was phase and that I would grow out of it. I've had numerous tests done and all my levels are normal. I have been convincing myself for the past couple years that I don't really want children because I wouldnt be able to do half the things that I do now. But as I reach 30 in a few months I realize that all the adventures I go on I am usually with one of my friends who has children. And here I am still without child. I have been TTC for several years. I just never wanted to admit that something was seriously wrong. I am falling apart because I think that being 30 is old! I know its not but I see all these other people with babies in their early to mid 20s and if I have a baby than all their kids will be way older than mine! 

sorry for the vent.. Im just having a really rough time coming to terms with the fact that I may never have children! :(
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Re: Finally willing to admit defeat!

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    LitterateurLitterateur member
    What @Deeny14 said. T&P for you

    Me (31) & DH (35) #DFDubClub
    TTC since August 2013 - Break: Jan-June 2014
    Everything looks good on me so far.  Going in for U/S in Oct just to be absolutely sure everything is good.
    SA for DH pending.
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    bsckgb7bsckgb7 member
    Yes!! Please get to an RE stat!!
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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    Par13Par13 member
    Yep - what @Deeny14 said!

    DS: 9/18/12 - 40w5d // DD: 05/17/16 - 40w


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    mrstmoosemrstmoose member
    So sorry for your struggles. I am by no means a medical professional but seeing a RE sounds like a fantastic idea. I would also recommend purchasing Taking Charge of Your Fertility and start temping, checking CM and all that stuff. It may not "solve" what else is going on but at least you can start looking at trends that occur. 

    But regardless, welcome and I hope you enjoy your stay here, this community and the ladies here are wealth of knowledge!
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    Minnie1155Minnie1155 member
    I feel what you are going through. I'm also recently 30 and having children has always been something I looked forward to. As others had said, if you haven't seen an RE, it can be helpful. I met with one recently and it made me feel a lot better knowing our options. I'm sorry you are going through this.
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    joleri23joleri23 member
    Definitely what everyone else has said.

    Also, from an "old" 30-year-old - you're as old or as young as you make yourself out to be. If you go around beating yourself up because you feel old, then yeah, you'll be old. 30 is not too old to be a parent. I know it's hard to watch your other friends with their kids and compare yourself to them, but so what? If you do get pregnant, you'll easily find other parents your age. Don't sweat it.
    July BMB Siggy Challenge: Weird Hot Dog Situations
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    sorarosesorarose member
    edited August 2015
    joleri23 said:
    Definitely what everyone else has said.

    Also, from an "old" 30-year-old - you're as old or as young as you make yourself out to be. If you go around beating yourself up because you feel old, then yeah, you'll be old. 30 is not too old to be a parent. I know it's hard to watch your other friends with their kids and compare yourself to them, but so what? If you do get pregnant, you'll easily find other parents your age. Don't sweat it.
    Also, depending on where you live, 30 is very young! I'm 29, and one of the youngest moms in my area...most of my friends are JUST getting married, if that, let alone having babies.


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    GridIronGrrl34GridIronGrrl34 member
    Just wanted to say that I had my first at 34 and now at 37, am planning on trying for my second. I don't feel old. It's all a state of mind! I know some great young moms, but for me I know I wasn't mature enough in my 20's and feel like I'm a much more responsible parent now than I was then. Do what's right for you, don't worry about the number! ;)
    Married 2007 - DH & I: 39
    DS #1: Sept 2011
    TTC #2 January 2015:  BFP 8/1/2015, MC 8/27/2015 
    Surprise BFP 6/28/17... Chemical pregnancy confirmed:  7/2/2017
    TTC #2 again:  July 2017
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    LinsbinsLinsbins member
    Get yourself to an RE! Stick around too, the ladies here will support you.
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    TheBorg7of9TheBorg7of9 member
    Go see a reproductive endocrinologist. They will do the complete testing, unlike an OB, on both you and your husband. Just getting your "levels checked" is not enough. You need more testing than that.
    My TTC History:
    2009: missed miscarriage #1 at 9 weeks (trisomy 16)
    2010: Infertility
    2011: Diagnosis and treatment (low sperm count, anastrozole for DH, clomid for me + IUI)
    2012: Baby #1
    2014: Baby #2
    October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
    March 2016 BFP#5, due November 2016.

    My Charts since 2009

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    BostonBaby1BostonBaby1 member
    30 is not old but it is time to see an RE so you and SO can both get full work ups and help TTC. Good luck!
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    vampbride99vampbride99 member
    30 definitely is not old, you are still very young.  I would suggest seeing a RE though, since you have been trying for some time.  Good luck!


    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    Lilypie Maternity tickers


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    girl2902girl2902 member
    girl2902 said:

    I've been exploring this site for a long time. I always thought that not getting pregnant would never happen to me. I am surrounded by kids. I love them and want one as my own. I always told myself that I would have a baby once I got settled. I was settled in life and 25. No baby. I have been irregular since middle school. Everyone always told me it was phase and that I would grow out of it. I've had numerous tests done and all my levels are normal. I have been convincing myself for the past couple years that I don't really want children because I wouldnt be able to do half the things that I do now. But as I reach 30 in a few months I realize that all the adventures I go on I am usually with one of my friends who has children. And here I am still without child. I have been TTC for several years. I just never wanted to admit that something was seriously wrong. I am falling apart because I think that being 30 is old! I know its not but I see all these other people with babies in their early to mid 20s and if I have a baby than all their kids will be way older than mine! 


    sorry for the vent.. Im just having a really rough time coming to terms with the fact that I may never have children! :(
    Yes my SO has been tested. And everything is good on his end. Still trying to figure out why I can't conceive.
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    girl2902girl2902 member
    I don't think my insurance will cover an RE visit. I have an appointment with my doctor in a few weeks to discuss the next steps. But at this point I don't even know what that is. ..
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