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February 2016 Moms
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Flame Free Confessions

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Re: Flame Free Confessions

  • minivanmafiaminivanmafia member
    edited August 2015
    AdventureMama said:


    AmandaSan said:

    @ AdventureMama:  I'm sorry.  Did you NOT read what TheBeggsBunch said to me about how "if she were me" she would leave the board?  Right there is a PRIME example of someone trying to run someone off the board!!!  Do you see me trying to tell her to leave the board?  No.  I'm just telling her I think she needs to stop being so mean to other women (including me.)  Am I the only one who can see this?  Please tell me someone else is seeing this?  This is ridiculous and is only serving to PROVE my point...

    I actually appreciate you pointing out a specific example because it really does help me understand where you're coming from. I do remember her saying that if it were her, she'd leave, but I guess I'm interpreting it differently than you. I think it's a pretty common occurrence for random people to come in and complain about the tone of the board and talk about how awful everyone here is, and the regs always wonder, "If it's so horrible, why stay?" I think that was the point @TheBeggsBunch is trying to make, not that you SHOULD leave, but that she wonders why someone would be compelled to stay if they think the whole board is meanies who bully people.

    Do you know what I mean? I'm really not being snarky here, I'm trying to explain what I think she meant by that (and she can correct me if I'm wrong! :) ). There are quite a few other popular pregnancy forums and apps out there so it seems odd to waste time in one you don't like much. I don't know.

    I also wanted to say that I actually can see how people who are newer and less familiar with the boards think we're being harsh when we continuously redirect threads and react with annoyance on certain types of posts. The problem is that a lot of us have been here for two or more months now (on this particular forum, I mean... many of us have been here for years and years on different boards). So when you see a gender disappointment thread, it might be the first one you've read, whereas not only have we seen ten of them this week, but we've also supported other posters through miscarriages and genetic abnormalities and other scary situations. So posting about being super disappointed about your perfectly healthy kid's genitalia (or the fact that you have to wait to find out what it is...) is not only old, repeat news, but it's really insensitive. Same with threads asking us to guess the sex, or ask if other people are showing, or whatever. We've seen it already, a hundred times, and we've patiently redirected every time. Because guess what would happen if we didn't? There would be no interesting conversations or anything to engage on in this forum, it would just be post after post from random drive by special snowflakes with no interest in actually getting to know people. 

    Do you see where I'm coming from?


    *** possible quote fail, I'm on mobile**
    Nope that's pretty much it. I am glad and thankful you wrote out the reasons why lurkers may be apprehensive to post because that's true. Also though, if they would just relax and pay attention they would see it for themselves. I remember plenty of people at the beginning say that it didn't bother them to see repeat post but as they got more active and pulled the app up on a daily basis they saw how it crowded the board and pushed someone need serious support to the bottom.

    And yes, I said that if I was on a board, mom meet up, co worker lunch group... Whatever.. And I didn't like how it was ran I would find another place that best suited me and my personality. Literally that simple.

    Edited for possible quote fail

    BabyFetus Ticker
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  • bumptarabumptara admin
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