Anybody else not hitting certain milestones?

chipmk228 · August 2015

Okay so I just had a initial screening evaluation with a Early Intervention coordinator and our primary concern was her poor head/neck support. However during the evaluation, my LO averted her eyes (rather than looking her in the face), didn't smile and kept her hands in fists. The coordinator said that this was unusual for a 13 week old. Now, we just moved to Orlando and I have no family/friends here (sigh) and this is my first child and I'm not regularly exposed to babies her age here (I tried meetups and such and have only briefly met 1 mom with a baby of equal age). So here's the issue.

My LO is 13 weeks old and smiles occasionally. She does not really coo (maybe 4 times a day) and definitely does not babble. If she's not crying for food or because she's tired....she's pretty silent. I would say she smiles maybe 5 times a day and perhaps more if she sees a ceiling fan. But she only occasionally smiles at us. She gives us eye contact but she gets distracted and does not give us that look like she is dissecting our face and does not reach for our faces. Her hands do open and close at times but they are mostly still in fists. When the coordinator used a light to check her tracking, my LO didn't give a darn. I read that babies at her age should start to imitate our faces. Ours doesn't unless she and I are both in awesome moods and we smile at each other. But this is just once a day max.

We have a pediatrician appointment this Friday and I have 2 pediatric neurology appointments set up. We also have a Early Intervention comprehensive evaluation set up as well for later this month but I just want to see if this is perhaps normal? Sorry if this doesn't make sense. I'm pretty upset right now. Google isn't helping as the more I read about this...the more I think she may have early signs of autism. My husband thinks I'm over-reacting and said that being a female lowers the risk...but now I'm super worried. I know every baby develops at his/her own time but it seems like she's significantly delayed

laceybee29 · August 2015

Have you tried encouraging her to smile by playing with her - simple games like peek a boo? Or signing nursery rhymes? Doing actions to songs? I constantly talk, sing & make faces at my baby when she is awake. We listen to music & dance, we watch music channels on TV & YouTube videos like Hey Bear baby sensory videos. From what you have smiling at your baby once a day really isn't enough. Also with regards to hands have you tried holding her hands, making movements of putting objects into her hands to practise grasping? My baby is also 13 weeks & has just starting holding things properly this week.

clarever · August 2015

I don't have any advice but I'm also experiencing some delays with my 14 week old.
He isn't reaching out for things at this point ( hands are mostly in fists as well) and has poor neck control and has yet to roll over. I've tried different forms of tummy time and try to dedicate a certain amount of time everyday for one on one (hard with 3 kids during the summer). He does smile and coo but only when I'm directly talking to him.
It sounds like your doing all you can right now for your little one. Hoping you'll find out more during your evaluation. I wouldn't worry too much as this point. I know that's easier said then done. Try to stay away from google.
My doctor doesn't seem to be concerned and considers it only a slight delay.

lola2bee · August 2015

Was she born early at all? I mean it sounds like she is doing almost everything but just in small quantities right now. It could be a delay but it seems slight. In any case you are on top of it and asking all the right questions. Keep working with your providers because even if worse case scenario and it Is something more serious you are on it so early and can do so much for her.

So sorry you are in your new place during this stressful time!! Hope this is even a little bit helpful.

chipmk228 · August 2015

Thank you for your replies! Yes, she was born 1 week early. But even despite that, she didn't meet some of her 2 month milestones. I am constantly trying to talk to her, sing to her, play songs on Pandora, read to her, etc. To be honest, I can only do so much though. At the end of the day, I'm so exhausted. I do a lot of hand motions with her as well but I constantly struggle trying to open her fist. She will bat at toys with a fist but she won't open and grab. Which is fine since that's not a milestone yet but she should at least be more open with her hands.

Oh and I might have described it incorrectly but I definitely don't smile at her just once a day!

I smile constantly. At least, I try to. Its hard to smile a lot when you're running on 4 hours of sleep, its the end of the day and there's no reciprocal smile.

jodi1008 · August 2015

My first son was very unsettle and cried a lot if I wasn't holding him. He wanted held or to sleep at my breast. He was very complicated to satisfy. He couldn't lift his head up while laying on his belly this early on but he did well with it while being held. He laughed and smiled too. He also gave eye contact. After he turned 2 is when I noticed him regress and that's when we did early intervention and he was diagnosed with autism 3 months ago. He stopped making eye contact and liked to play with objects that aren't toys. He didn't want to imitate or point either. He's very coordinated but doesn't talk yet. Also has trouble following instructions, it's pretty much his communication. Since he was my first child I didn't notice as much because he's the first child I had been around constantly so I didn't know what exactly was normal. Since early intervention he now knows what he's supposed to do so its behavioral now which is part of autism. I'm hoping his speech comes soon so he can explain his needs much easier.
Now with my second child, he's very content and interacts so much. Coos and smiles all the time and he's already found his mouth blowing raspberries with both his tongue and lips. Easy breast feeder from day 1 and sleeps all night. After experiencing both sides of it I now understand. Props to you for noticing something you wanted a closer look at!! If there is anything that needs worked on, it's so great you caught it this early!!

nursej519 · August 2015

My LO sounds very similar to yours. She was born 5 weeks early, however. She is 15 weeks and has poor neck control, doesn't love looking at faces all the time, and definitely doesn't roll over or reach for things. We are also starting with EI. I know how it feels to be worried, because I am in your shoes!! But I kept telling myself that all babies mature at different rates. I have noticed that every day she does a little bit more, so I think it will all happen in a matter of time. You aren't alone!!

And FWIW, I have heard that signs of autisim can NOT be noticed this early.

DMEL · August 2015

Signs of autism are not apparent at this age. In fact, they are typically first noticed in the form of regression (such as- child was speaking and maintaining eye contact and then these skills went away). Usually the earliest signs are noticed are approximately 18 months - 3 years of age. So please rest assured that these "delays" are not indicative of anything major. In fact, they sound very minor to me. I wouldn't be overly concerned at 3 months.

TessaGarringer · August 2015

My son is 13 weeks old. He was a nicu baby from birth until 12weeks old. He smiles, coos, imitates my faces and sounds I make. He does keep his hands in fists but is starting to open them more after being home. And will shake rattles if I place them in his hands. He hasn't learned to pick stuff up yet. Which I think he is behind on.

danibonello · August 2015

TessaGarringer said:
My son is 13 weeks old. He was a nicu baby from birth until 12weeks old. He smiles, coos, imitates my faces and sounds I make. He does keep his hands in fists but is starting to open them more after being home. And will shake rattles if I place them in his hands. He hasn't learned to pick stuff up yet. Which I think he is behind on.

13 week olds are supposed to be picking things up? Where did you hear that? I've only recently been able to get my LO to grasp anything other than a finger for more than a second.

MrsElizabethPlano · August 2015

My 1st LO was like that too. Quiet, and content all the time. Very rarely babbled or made faces with me, and didn't really smile or roll until 4m old (smiled super rarely until past age 1). He didn't grab stuff by himself before 3m, I usually let him reach for a bit before i put it in his grasp. During 4m he grabbed stuff very well and pulled everything towards his mouth.

All of a sudden things started happening. Crawled before 6m, walked at 9m, only said about 3 words before the age of 1 but then at 2 he knew and said everything a pre-k kid knew minus some social skills.

Have everything checked out if you're concerned of course, but there's probably no need.

My new LO started grabbing things on her own at 12w, (stole a pen out of my dad's shirt pocket) but I think there's a large period at which that milestone is normal. Like I said my oldest was probably 19w when he could properly grab something.

rklinge0 · August 2015

Babies develop at different paces so try not to worry too much. Just voice your concerns now so if there is a problem you can get help.
My lo has met most of her milestones so far but since she has a diagnosis, ei is supposed to come in anyways. I would rather have her get help now to get her up with her same age peers than wait. My little one has downs. (Technically was on the june board but she was born on memorial day).

smashbaby111 · August 2015

This describes my 13 week old perfectly, I could have written the original post. I think she is just quietly observant, but I'll be asking my pedi about it at the next appt

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