Good toys for babies?

leighann1 · August 2015

@przemodbabe

No drama here. Just a sense of humor and a healthy does of surprise at the tone this took. Carry on.

przemosbabe · August 2015

leighann1 said:

@przemodbabe

No drama here. Just a sense of humor and a healthy does of surprise at the tone this took. Carry on.

Yes plenty of other threads if you are desperate for entertainment.

leighann1 · August 2015

przemosbabe said:

leighann1 said:

@przemodbabe

No drama here. Just a sense of humor and a healthy does of surprise at the tone this took. Carry on.

Yes plenty of other threads if you are desperate for entertainment.

That seems rather rude. Why this tone? I don't understand...

jennylynn103 · August 2015

Sooooo....ummm....yay for Sophie the Giraffe?

Rachel623 · August 2015

I'm a big fan of the toys that grow with your child.

We got DD a fisher price kick and play piano when she was really little, like a couple months old. She loved kicking the keys to make music and it doubled as a play gym. When she got older and sat up, we converted it and she would play the piano with her hands.

We also got a fisher price step and play piano. It starts like of like a walker where the baby can walk back and forth and spin while playing with the instruments. When she started walking we took the seat out and she would just walk into it. She played with it with her friends until we put it away shortly after her second birthday. She probably would have kept going but we needed the room for toys she got for her birthday. I anticipate that she'll play with it again when we get it out for her little sister.

For tiny stocking stuffer like toys, the oball rattle and others that have tiny handles were good when she was really young. It was way easier for her to grip them and she got a kick out of making noise herself.

Finally, she loved the wooden Melissa and Doug toys. We have the old school hammer set and train made of blocks and she still plays with both.

kfry22 · August 2015

jefinley1 · August 2015

@Knottie16832459 I clicked on this because I was interested in toys for babies. I feel like I'm completely lost in this department, and there can be such a push of the "you NEED this" mentality on new moms. I like the original post too, as I also have no toys yet aside from a couple of books, and would like to buy my daughter some presents for Christmas as well, unlike that nasty @MariahOBrien grinch

. I also really liked your ideas and comments. It helped reassure and remind me that even if my daughter doesn't have dedicated toys for a couple of months, and has to wait the whole way until Christmas, it won't make me a bad mom, and her brain will still grow at whatever pace it is intended to. Plus you gave some great ideas for makeshift toys!

I loved the mix of ideas from everyone for toys you can buy, but also the reminder that no matter how many you buy, your child may still toss them away for a water bottle. I think it just goes to show that different people find different ideas helpful, and that's OK! If that isn't what OP was looking for, that's fine, but I think her topic was great, and other people might find other responses meaningful. No one owns the thread!

P.S. So that I can't be accused of not contributing toy ideas, one of our friends who isn't a parent but will be our daughter's godfather and is incredibly science-y picked out a dangling toy with mirrors and stimulating colors. He assured us that based on his research, the visual complexity and stimulation would encourage brain development. I love my nerdy friends!

VioletandRose · August 2015

BrooklynBroussard said:

"Hey, I am choosing to play with my child and not do a lot of toys. "

"Um, WALL OF TEXT WALL OF TEXT HULK ANGRY!"

Except, that's not how it was put. I definitely see both sides of the story here, but did find Knottie whatever-the-numbers-are's post to be judgy and condescending. It wasn't phrased as what SHE does, but rather, what YOU should do for YOUR baby, and if you don't, you're lazy. The sentence "I'm a working mom but these things need to have time made for when raising a kid. " Really? The OP never implied that she was going to throw some toys in her kid's pack and play and go read a book or take a bath. She just asked if anyone had suggestions for developmental toys. The response made it sound as if she was a bad mother for even suggesting it. So yes, I understood why the OP got defensive. For what it's worth, I too am a first time bio-mom, but am a stepmother to a 6-year-old little girl with autism. This weekend's favorite "toy" was an empty paper towel tube that we took turns singing into. However, she does have an array of actual toys that she enjoys and we also play WITH her. Watching her face light up at a Frozen music-playing hairbrush is priceless; there's nothing 'wrong' with giving your child that kind of happiness. Just my opinion.

MariahOBrien · August 2015

jefinley1 said:
@Knottie16832459 I clicked on this because I was interested in toys for babies. I feel like I'm completely lost in this department, and there can be such a push of the "you NEED this" mentality on new moms. I like the original post too, as I also have no toys yet aside from a couple of books, and would like to buy my daughter some presents for Christmas as well, unlike that nasty @MariahOBrien grinch . I also really liked your ideas and comments. It helped reassure and remind me that even if my daughter doesn't have dedicated toys for a couple of months, and has to wait the whole way until Christmas, it won't make me a bad mom, and her brain will still grow at whatever pace it is intended to. Plus you gave some great ideas for makeshift toys!

I loved the mix of ideas from everyone for toys you can buy, but also the reminder that no matter how many you buy, your child may still toss them away for a water bottle. I think it just goes to show that different people find different ideas helpful, and that's OK! If that isn't what OP was looking for, that's fine, but I think her topic was great, and other people might find other responses meaningful. No one owns the thread!

P.S. So that I can't be accused of not contributing toy ideas, one of our friends who isn't a parent but will be our daughter's godfather and is incredibly science-y picked out a dangling toy with mirrors and stimulating colors. He assured us that based on his research, the visual complexity and stimulation would encourage brain development. I love my nerdy friends!

Being called a 'nasty grinch' is the highest compliment I've ever received. Omg. I might cry.

elmann1 · August 2015

MariahOBrien said:

Being called a 'nasty grinch' is the highest compliment I've ever received. Omg. I might cry.

Compliments are big here @MariahOBrien, you didnt know?

MariahOBrien · August 2015

@elmann1 duh!

Birdee212 · August 2015

@VioletandRose I get how that comment could have been taken that way, but I sincerely do not think Knottie intended it to come across as condescending, more like "an infant that young probably doesn't need developmental toys because she will get enough stimulation through personal interaction so don't even worry about it." And when OP said that she found the comment rude, Knottie apologized and tried to explain but that wasn't good enough for OP and she continued to respond inappropriately. I don't understand how anyone could read this thread and not think OP was overreacting and being hostile.

elmann1 · August 2015

Knottie16832459 said:

@przemosbabe Bless your heart, I'm so sorry I came off that way to you. First time bio mom, but not my first child, assumption is never a flattering color on someone. I do wish you the best in your search for help from others on this thread and only meant to help reassure you that you already had the best tools for your baby.

@Knottie1684259 You're so kind to apologize. Again, I feel like I've been too cranky to apologize to people (unless its DH then I feel guilty for days!)

Birdee212 · August 2015

On the subject of educational or developmental toys, there was some study that found that BabyEinstein was basically total bullshit and had no effect on an infant's brain development. The reason children who were made to watch those videos did well in grade school was because they had the types of parents who were hyper-vigilant enough to buy something like BabyEinstein to stimulate their child's brain. The kid is more likely to succeed because those parents put energy into their child's education and development regardless.

Same with the Airborne tablets. Ineffective, but if you're the kind of person who takes it, you're probably conscientious enough about your health to take precautions that actually do prevent colds.

I hope that made sense. I'm really tired.

texasmommahen · August 2015

Coming from a semi-southerner (Does Texas actually.count as the South? My hubby from Mississippi says no...) that "Bless Your Heart" at the beginning definitely negated any positive connotation of that appology. That was the snarkiest faux appology I've ever read....just sayin'.

mollypuss1 · August 2015

So .... Yeah.... I'd never heard of Sophie the Giraffe until I read a post on here a few weeks ago and then this Sat I was out shopping and I saw her sitting on the shelf, staring at me with her £12 ($19) price tag, so I succumbed and bought her solely because the reviews on here were so positive. She seems very expensive for a teething toy so I hope she was worth it.

VioletandRose · August 2015

Birdee212 said:

@VioletandRose I get how that comment could have been taken that way, but I sincerely do not think Knottie intended it to come across as condescending, more like "an infant that young probably doesn't need developmental toys because she will get enough stimulation through personal interaction so don't even worry about it." And when OP said that she found the comment rude, Knottie apologized and tried to explain but that wasn't good enough for OP and she continued to respond inappropriately. I don't understand how anyone could read this thread and not think OP was overreacting and being hostile.

I don't disagree with you at all about the OP's reaction. I actually thought @leighann1 and subsequent posts were hilarious and didn't get the hostility. I just feel like people were being a little too hard on the OP, and Knottie number's posts, while they were meant to be helpful, came across as b*tchy; IMO she was the one who turned an innocent thread about toys into an argument. Even her "apology" had snarky tones. ("Assumption is never a flattering color on someone.") Her intentions were good, but her delivery was not. Both posters were unnecessarily combative.

LiveNLove44 · August 2015

przemosbabe said:

leighann1 said:

@przemodbabe

No drama here. Just a sense of humor and a healthy does of surprise at the tone this took. Carry on.

Yes plenty of other threads if you are desperate for entertainment.

@przemosbabe, sometimes posters need to bring in a little levity to lighten the mood. For some, seeing a couple people become combative can be frustrating, and they want to bring a little light to the thread. It certainly isn't personal. Your response here takes the thread in the opposite direction. I think you have a great thread here with excellent contributions by many BTDT mommies. Try to let it be just that without making personal attacks.

Birdee212 · August 2015

@TexasBride90 I'm a southerner and I took her "bless" to be one of exasperation not condescension. Then again, I don't subscribe to the idea that "Bless your Heart" is always used as a covert "Fuck You". That's just not how we use it in our family. And I would consider the half of Texas that borders Louisiana to be the South so you're probably fine

texasmommahen · August 2015

@Birdee212 yaaay! I'm excited to report that to my stubborn hubby. Lol

Everywhere I've gone it's just such a loaded phrase! I've gotten to where I simply try to never use it. I suppose that reading "bless your heart" followed closely by "Assumption is never a flattering color on someone" i interpreted it as the proverbial gauntlet being thrown. Haha

MirandaC1984 · August 2015

TexasBride90 said:
Coming from a semi-southerner (Does Texas actually.count as the South? My hubby from Mississippi says no...) that "Bless Your Heart" at the beginning definitely negated any positive connotation of that appology. That was the snarkiest faux appology I've ever read....just sayin'.

Southerner here as well. North Carolina to be exact. The phrase "bless your heart" can mean anything from "Go $&@* yourself", to a sincere "I'm so sorry". The spectrum is wide and one can easily be misinterpreted in written correspondence. Either way I feel the OP took it WAY overboard and far too personally.

komorebi · August 2015

Thank you, Mariah. My comment was no indication on whether or not I thought you needed to be told, in fact I literally said its a "duh!" kind of comment to imply that it didn't need to be said. My comment was to say that if you cover those fundamental points, then any toy is a good toy, even the water bottle that I commented on.

------

I think most reasonable people read your post to mean what you meant. And it's so true. And often overlooked by first time moms, and in no way means they're idiot's.

My kids all loved mirrors. And those plastic holey balls.

DeeGreer · August 2015

In good ol Marietta, GA where I'm from "bless your heart" is as sincere as our tea is sweet. It's usually followed by a hug and some heartfelt advice. Not what happened in this instance but I didn't take it as snark, likely because of where I was raised.

At any rate, my 7 month old cousin is fascinated by mirrors and tactile books. That's what I bought. I was entertained by pretty much anything as a kid, but especially the wrapper from Christmas gifts! Poo on the presents, give me all the sparkly paper and bows!

intheversa · August 2015

With @deegreer here, I'm from Missouri, and "bless your heart" is never viewed as an insult or condescending. But I'm not getting into this. My MIL wants us to turn a bedroom into a playroom because she says the baby will have that many toys. I sure hope not. I have a feeling our kid will be perfectly happy with an Amazon box verses all the toys inside of it. Kids seem to like the simplest things.

P.S. Sofia the giraffe is expensive! $25 at Target and BBB. The elephant and sheep are only $13. I'm not banking on anyone buying that giraffe off my registry.

przemosbabe · August 2015

@BrooklynBroussard, at this point, I feel you are only on this birth board to try to upset people. Because of that, I don't respect your opinion, and anything you have to say is ill considered. There are plenty of threads and posters on this board. I don't know why you are taking such interest in me, but it's quite concerning that you really can't find anything else to do with yourself. Everyone else, offense is in the eye of the beholder, and I'm not the only one who found what knottie wrote to be rude. Just because you personally don't think it was rude means nothing. I did. And the issue has already been closed, why are you dragging this on and on? I don't care if you don't agree with me. I'm not here to make friends and I am not part of the "sisterhood" here so you can all try to scold me and tell I'm wrong for being a human being that is different than yourself having my own personal thoughts and feelings if you want to, but that's not going to change my opinion. So you're wasting your time. The issue has been closed. I don't care what you think of me. Don't assume that a first time mom will "overlook" anything. My child will have been to over half the planet before the age of 5 due to mine and my husbands work with those living in poverty. People in such fields are not going to overlook fundamental points in a child's development by handing them expensive toys all the time, and even if we did, so what? The point is you don't know me, or the circumstances of anyone's life that posts on a forum, which is why it's best to keep presumptions and unasked for opinions on a straight forward questions to yourself. That's just like someone asking about good tv shows for toddlers, and then me barging in saying how awful it is to let your child watch tv at all because I personally don't have one. I have been on the bump for 8 years and never go on someone's thread unless I can answer the direct question, and I never ever add an opinion in unless it's asked for. I'm not use to women like knottie or BrooklynBroussard as I mostly hang out on the infertility board and we all have been through way too much and get no pleasure out of making snide, rude condescending comments and stick to the topic at hand. You can all continue to talk amongst yourselves if you want to, but I personally still have a lot of preparing to do for my baby, and I use this website as a tool to do so. I don't need "entertainment". so I will ask elsewhere. Enjoy yourselves.

Cupcakesandquilts · August 2015

Well, @BrooklynBroussard, I guess she told you!

LiveNLove44 · August 2015

przemosbabe said:

@BrooklynBroussard, at this point, I feel you are only on this birth board to try to upset people. Because of that, I don't respect your opinion, and anything you have to say is ill considered. There are plenty of threads and posters on this board. I don't know why you are taking such interest in me, but it's quite concerning that you really can't find anything else to do with yourself. Everyone else, offense is in the eye of the beholder, and I'm not the only one who found what knottie wrote to be rude. Just because you personally don't think it was rude means nothing. I did. And the issue has already been closed, why are you dragging this on and on? I don't care if you don't agree with me. I'm not here to make friends and I am not part of the "sisterhood" here so you can all try to scold me and tell I'm wrong for being a human being that is different than yourself having my own personal thoughts and feelings if you want to, but that's not going to change my opinion. So you're wasting your time. The issue has been closed. I don't care what you think of me. Don't assume that a first time mom will "overlook" anything. My child will have been to over half the planet before the age of 5 due to mine and my husbands work with those living in poverty. People in such fields are not going to overlook fundamental points in a child's development by handing them expensive toys all the time, and even if we did, so what? The point is you don't know me, or the circumstances of anyone's life that posts on a forum, which is why it's best to keep presumptions and unasked for opinions on a straight forward questions to yourself. That's just like someone asking about good tv shows for toddlers, and then me barging in saying how awful it is to let your child watch tv at all because I personally don't have one. I have been on the bump for 8 years and never go on someone's thread unless I can answer the direct question, and I never ever add an opinion in unless it's asked for. I'm not use to women like knottie or BrooklynBroussard as I mostly hang out on the infertility board and we all have been through way too much and get no pleasure out of making snide, rude condescending comments and stick to the topic at hand. You can all continue to talk amongst yourselves if you want to, but I personally still have a lot of preparing to do for my baby, and I use this website as a tool to do so. I don't need "entertainment". so I will ask elsewhere. Enjoy yourselves.

This is certainly the most offensive post in this thread. It's callous and dismissive. It makes you appear as though you couldn't care less about any of the members who are participating. You didn't just call out one or two people, but you identified a group and have now clarified that you don't care what any of the group thinks. For that reason, it seems safe to assume that you are not interested in being part of this BMB. If that is the case, I wish you the very best with the rest of your journey, but please don't continue to tear people down who certainly work to provide other mothers and mothers-to-be with feedback and insight. I don't know what you and any other posters have when it comes to other disagreements, but from what I've read here, this kind of response is entirely out of place.

LiveNLove44 · August 2015

BrooklynBroussard said:

@livenlove44 I promise you, I have no issue with this person. I really have no clue why she keeps putting my name out there. I just want to put it out there, because I personally think I'm above that catty behavior. Like I have said, I really hate when people meltdown online. I get no pleasure in it.

It gets really tiring to hear how often I feel like people demand an apology from you and I've read the same posts thinking, "For what?" I really don't think you need to spend any time worrying about it. I have always appreciated your contributions to this BMB, and I don't know why anyone would call you out specifically. It's a bunch of hocus pocus and bull twaddle to me.

Unknown · August 2015

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MariahOBrien · August 2015

**Removed for TOU violation**

Ok, I'm sorry, but you keep mentioning 'the other place' and I'm beginning to feel like you are a ghost or something

tate62610 · August 2015

Well, you were given some pretty good suggestions.

I think you're taking some comments in the wrong way and coming off as very hostile.

Sofie giraffe is pricey but definitely worth it. She squeaks so just be prepared for that should you step on her. I had no idea and just about had a heart attack when I stepped on her in the middle of the night.

LiveNLove44 · August 2015

@brokenoven, I value your insight and input, and I think it's important for women to feel supported. I think you have offered good support for OP, and for that I am sure she is thankful. With that said, there is no reason for you to write off how any one else here feels about being pregnant. No one's journey is any less important than someone else's. We all have a story.

Unknown · August 2015

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tate62610 · August 2015

Yes. Please do not insinuate "these women" value their child and pregnancy any less than another. You also do not know their stories. Thank you. Best wishes.

MariahOBrien · August 2015

@BrooklynBroussard damn it! I got really excited thinking maybeeee we had a close encounter with the third kind!!

Just kidding. To piggyback off of your previous point: I agree, it isn't fair to assume anything about anyone, ever. I don't think OP needed to react with such hostility to more than one poster. This forum should not be taken quite so seriously. Sigh.

AmyB421 · August 2015

@brokenoven just because I didn't spend thousands to conceive my child doesn't mean that I don't see the value in my child's life and recognize the joy in being pregnant. I had losses and struggled to get pregnant but unfortunately my husband and I didn't have thousands to spend getting pregnant. You know nothing about anyone on this board and what their journey was to get to this point in their lives and I find your comment hurtful rude and deeply offensive.

casserole27 · August 2015

Just a heated debate about baby toys NBD.

tate62610 · August 2015

I may not have spent thousands to get pregnant but I spent thousands on the bills following my losses. Please be careful what you assume. I have nothing further to add to this thread. Sorry if this got a little AW.

MariahOBrien · August 2015

BrooklynBroussard said:
@MariahOBrien I just don't understand where the anger comes from. And I know this is Awing a bit, but I really don't know why she keeps singling me out. I don't want half my posts to be about petty things. Can't we get back to being tolerant people? I thought my hulk gif was funny, because she got very angry. That's it. If she would've said "my bad guys, I overreacted" we would have all been forgiving.

So I'm really sorry to you gals that I've been involved in this drama. I know you're sick of reading it. But she is saying some really insulting things top me and seeking only me out. I'll gladly take some suggestions on how to get this to stop if anyone wants to PM me.

I'm PMing you!

Unknown · August 2015

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