Twatwaffle Tuesday

indibidule · July 2015

On a side note, my phone now recognizes the word twatwaffle.

nickicb7 · July 2015

Mosquitos are twatwaffles! I've been at the cottage for less than 24 hours and I have at least 10 bites, and in all the most annoying places! Screw you Mosquitos!

Cricket99 · July 2015

My dog is aTwatwaffle! She decided to get muddy head to toe and require a bath. Add to that DH being out of town, which means that I got to wrestle the 80lb beast into the bathtub by myself! The worst part is that she is too darn cute to stay mad at. What a Twatwaffle!

mrsgetz4000 · July 2015

@Cricket99 I sympathize. My husband is working 3 jobs and he usually bathes his dog. I did it because she really needed it and he's been busy and now has bronchitis. This is our pit bull, sugar getting her bath. Before she jumped out 3 times. She's the sweetest girl ever. And a twatwaffle

BrieJolly · July 2015

My DH! He decided to sleep while I was in the shower this morning and let our two year old DD go downstairs by herself. She has an obsession with eggs lately. Not eating them though, taking them out of the fridge and walking around with them. I went downstairs after my shower and all but two eggs of a full dozen were cracked and spread out from the kitchen, through the living, dining, and playroom. Ugh! I wasn't expecting to mop all my floors today.

sarah92544 · July 2015

My sister is a twatwaffle today. I love that we live across the street from each other but i did not sleep well last night and she came and woke me up for our morning run all peppy and awake and i HATE her right now. I did not want to run but i did and then did a few laps in the pool but i really wanted to sleep in today where is this so called energy o suppose to be feeling?

Snoopylovesbelle · July 2015

The guy who bought our house is a Twatwaffle. When we went to settlement we asked if there were any of the landscape plants he didn't want to let us know we would take them then or come get them later. I worked for 4 years on the garden at that house and it was my pride and joy. I had to drive through the neighborhood yesterday to pick up some kids and OMG! The 7 hydrandgas out front are all dead. He hacked the beautiful climbing roses out and ripped out the arbor. The lilac bush, barberry bushes, perennials and ornamental trees all gone. I couldn't believe it I ugly cried for 20 minutes. Most everything was hacked to the ground. If I had known I would have dug it all up and taken it with me. I know it's not my house anymore but thousands of dollars worth of perfectly good plants gone.

( X(

LauraFi · July 2015

@Snoopylovesbelle some people just don't understand. I would have been devastated and heart broken. We currently have our house back home rented out while we are living away and I am anxious to see what the yard/plants look like when we move back next year.

andimegie325 · July 2015

This girl at work, who is older than I am and yes I still call her a girl, has made my twatwaffle list AGAIN today. Any time she gets something at work which is considered "above" the normal for our position she has to talk as loud as she can about it so EVERYONE knows exactly how "special" she is. You don't hear me bragging about the promotion and the significant raise I got (that now makes me this girl's superior in more ways than one) so why do you feel the need to brag about getting access to a stupid spreadsheet. Good lord!

Sovvy · July 2015

My legs are TW. I did a leg workout yesterday and it was all at least half the weight I used to use and I am so sore I could die.

sarah92544 · July 2015

@Snoopylovesbelle i would have lost it too. My kids like to help in the yard so i let them plant some watermelon they were growing so good until my cousin (he rents our pool house) decided to go through the recycling and dump a redbull in their plants and killed them. My kids were so sad that i cried and damn near kicked his ass out! It sucks you cant do anything about it but you told him you would take the plants he should have been more considerate of your hard work. EFFING twatwaffles!

Edited stupid phone likes to make up its own words

ChipMonster · July 2015

Oh @Snoopylovesbelle would you car to come and teach me how to landscape?? I feel like such a failure of a homeowner because I have no idea what I'm doing with my flowers. All I want is a beautiful front yard, instead I have dead flowers and big open spaces. I blame DH because he doesn't ever want to water or says he will then doesn't!

Snoopylovesbelle · July 2015

The first year I killed everything lol but then I figured it out. Send me pics! I can try to help.

JandJ62914 · July 2015

@snoopylovesbelle That is so sad! Hydrangeas are my favorite.

@chipmonster Story of my life! DH never waters when he says he will.

jgregory0215 · July 2015

The word twat is a twatwaffle .... It makes me cringe :-SS

Paige6410 · July 2015

The sales guys at DH's work are TWs.
They ripped off this lady that lives alone and DH is doing everything in his power to help her get her money's worth for this job. Which means longer, more difficult days for him. I feel bad.

TinyDancer51510 · July 2015

@Snoopylovesbelle: I'd have been pissed too! Gardening is hard work! :-(

Warning: This is going to be long.

My cousin is being a HUGE twatwaffle. Long story short, my grandpa died in Dec and there was a dispute between my mom and her two siblings about the will. I knew there were going to be issues so I sat my cousin (my mom's sister's daughter) down and we promised that we weren't going to let our parents issues become ours. Well, she went back on that within a few months, just like I knew she would. Fortunately everything with the will was settled in a way that at least tipped toward fair.

Two weeks ago, my mom, brother, and I drove down to meet my uncle in NC to clear out my grandpa's condo. We packed everything up and brought most of it home. My brother (who is starting up his graphic design business) got our grandpa's Mac computer and posted a pic of it on FB. Our cousin commented, asking if it was Grandpa's, and he said yes.

This past Saturday morning, my cousin goes on FB and starts whining about how when her other grandparents died, her bio dad sold everything and she got nothing (which I agree was completely shitty of him) and she never imagined the same thing would happen on the other side of the family. Now she has *nothing* to remember our grandparents by because the thieves in the night (us) stole it all. Ladies, not only is she living rent free in the $250,000 house our grandpa bought outright for her mom and step-dad, there are also plenty of sentimental pieces of furniture in the house that we would all love to have. Plus things like the Paddington Bear they bought in England and so on. She was not left with *nothing*. This chick is pissed and willing to ruin her relationships with her family over a Mac and a bed that she wanted. And spread the drama all over FB like she's 12 years old. She's 32!!!!!!!! Our grandparents would be rolling over in their graves to know that she's doing this. My mom and her brother both got probably around $100,000. Their sister got a $250,000 house free and clear! And my cousin (her daughter) had the nerve to call my mom and uncle greedy bastards because they wanted my aunt to pay for her share of the cremation and estate taxes out of her own money instead of it coming out of their inheritance. She is already financially better off than both of them!!!!! If it were me, I would be doing everything in my power to make sure my siblings were going to be okay.

Ugh, okay. I could keep ranting but I've rambled long enough. The only blessing in this is that my cousin unfriended me on FB back in February over something else. So I don't even have to read the crap she's saying to my mom and uncle which makes it so much easier for me to not let her suck me in.

kalahall13 · July 2015

Can my cravings be TWs? I hope so because last night I was craving something in particular and could not figure it out. Needless to say I woke up still feeling unsatisfied.. And feeling hungry but only hungry for that one thing.

BabyRut2015 · July 2015

My boss is a TW.....for leaving the company, I've worked with him/for him a better part of 9 years....since I was 18/19 years old and I'm 27!

I went to hand him a card and tell him bye and immediately started bawling, he's not the huggy type so I was suprised when he gave me a hug...a good one...

Then he told me I was the reason he got the new job....during his interviewing process someone came in and asked about him and I gave him amazing reviews and talked about how amazing of a boss he was, how he always got stuff done if you went to him about anything, and how I'd loved working for him.

TW for doing this to me when I'm pregnant! Does this count? Lol

Oh well its all i have this week I'm more weepy than angry lately....

KaraEpp16 · July 2015

Snoopylovesbelle said:

The guy who bought our house is a Twatwaffle. When we went to settlement we asked if there were any of the landscape plants he didn't want to let us know we would take them then or come get them later. I worked for 4 years on the garden at that house and it was my pride and joy. I had to drive through the neighborhood yesterday to pick up some kids and OMG! The 7 hydrandgas out front are all dead. He hacked the beautiful climbing roses out and ripped out the arbor. The lilac bush, barberry bushes, perennials and ornamental trees all gone. I couldn't believe it I ugly cried for 20 minutes. Most everything was hacked to the ground. If I had known I would have dug it all up and taken it with me. I know it's not my house anymore but thousands of dollars worth of perfectly good plants gone. ( X(

I would have ugly cried, too. That's effing awful.

ChelseyBels · July 2015

My constant hunger is a TW. I eat. I'm hungry. I snack. I'm starving. I go to bed. I wake up in the middle of the night wanting food. I wake up. My stomach is growling is so loud.

(

sbeara25 · July 2015

My preggers brain..... Live on the main floor in an appartment. I open the patio door to cool the place off during the day. Guess who didn't close it last night. This girl

so SO got home from work at 4 last night and had a mini panic attack.

Weird thing is is I have a clear memory of doing it.... Blah preggo brain

deaddahliah · July 2015

My siblings are TWs. My brother is in town for my mom's 70th, and neither he nor my sister understand that 3pm lunches and 9 pm dinners don't work for a constantly hungry pregnant woman. You can only snack so many times before those snacks equal a meal. I'm the baby by 14 and 18 yrs so if I even breathe a word about this or decide to eat on my own I'm being a snotty brat... Ugh!

My kitten is also a TW. If she isn't trying to bite my fingers and toes,she's walking on my neck, laying on my neck, stepping on my mouth, or just booping my mouth with her paws.

mommaSimpkin · July 2015

DH is a TW. He keeps bringing home more mouths to feed. We have a dog and a hedgehog. Both require buying food for twice a month, and Hedgie requires bedding.
Yesterday he brought home two little leopard geckos. Baby ones. So now we need a bigger tank, more food, a heat lamp, sand, hiding places, Ect.

Guess whose the one to clean and take care of all these fur babies? . Me.
I asked for a small dog and he wasn't having it, but he brings home geckos?! I won't touch them. They're small and fast and not my thing.
Ugh.

But I can't be too mad at him, he did get promoted at work.. So he's bring home a little more pay each paycheck, but damn it.. Stupid geckos.

Lemonpig1 · July 2015

So I was buying corn at the farmer’s market on Saturday and I was checking the ears, like you do, by pulling back the husks just a little to make sure there were no obvious worms/rot/etc. Just a pregnant lady in the “maybe-she’s-4-months/maybe-she’s-just-fat”-stage buyin’ corn. An older woman was standing near me and I ~think~ she said, in kind of a quiet sing-song voice:

[-X When you do that, you ruin them for everyone! [-X

I was just kind of like wait, wut? Is that actually what she said? Was it directed at me? No one else was near her, but she wasn’t looking directly at me and her tone made me question whether I’d heard her right. But it also seemed like a classic passive-aggressive older lady at a farmer’s market corn-shaming, because that is exactly the kind of thing that happens where I live.

So: Seriously, lady? THIS IS HOW YOU BUY CORN. I was not wrenching the husks off and then tossing the ears on the ground when they didn’t have the exact ration of white-to-yellow kernels I needed for my Pinterest photos! I checked four ears and put exactly those four ears in my basket to buy, thus never visiting my apparent corn savagery on other shoppers. And if I had found some obvious defect, like mold, I wouldn’t have put the corn back in the crate for other people to happen upon; I would have brought it to the damn farmer and been like “madam, this corn is busted,” therefore taking it out of the general population and HELPING other people, as opposed to RUINING it for them!

But even worse was that I couldn’t really talk back to her or even give her a dirty look because I couldn’t be sure she actually said what she said in the first place! I mean I really do think that’s what happened or I wouldn’t be this incensed by it. I’m just not visibly pregnant enough yet to justify confronting random old twats who don’t know how to buy vegetables correctly.

Even if she didn’t say it she was wearing the dumbest earrings of all time so I’m calling TW on the whole situation anyway. I hope she enjoys all the rotten fruits and vegetables she must buy on the reg since she’s morally against checking out her produce.

KaraEpp16 · July 2015

@Lemonpig1

I have to agree with that old lady. Sorry, but that's not how you buy corn. I just got four ears the other day and got them *GASP* by just picking them up and putting them in the basket. They were all perfect. It's peak season.

emililyha · July 2015

My husbands boss is a TW. Every day he comes home feeling defeated and like crap because his boss is such a garbage micromanager that won't just let him do his job. And because he's so unhappy at work we can't commit to buying a house here in case he gets a new job in another state. So we're stuck in this 1br apartment until he finds a new job. I'm just praying it happens before January.

sbeara25 · July 2015

I would check too. It doesn't happen often but there was a time that I got home and 3 of my 6 corn were kaput. So now I check because I was quite sad. If somethings kaput you tell the people selling. They have a rep to uphold to you know and most of the time the appreciate it

bella2210 · July 2015

Corn-shaming, I love it. I always feel self-conscious squeezing the fruit at the grocery store. I don't want to wait a week to eat it but sometimes I feel judged looking for the ripe ones.

Lemonpig1 · July 2015

@KaraEpp16 I was wondering if anyone would come and say they don't think people should check on corn either! And honestly I'm open to having it explained to me if I'M actually the TW. If I were wrecking corn and then putting it back, I agree that would be totally bad and I will never be that person. But I really think checking quickly to make sure there are no obvious defects is also normal and acceptable, and some grocery stores even have bins near the corn area for people to shuck into.

Anyway, I don't wanna highjack this thread with my corn drama, but I do welcome other people weighing in.

indibidule · July 2015

@Lemonpig1 I completely agree with you. The pharmacy I work in is part of s chain grocery store. There's a trash bin right next to the corn so people can do just this. Also, Even during peak season, there's the chance to get a bad ear and no other way to tell. Also, it does nothing bad to the corn for anyone else.

KaraEpp16 · July 2015

Lemonpig1 said:

@KaraEpp16 I was wondering if anyone would come and say they don't think people should check on corn either! And honestly I'm open to having it explained to me if I'M actually the TW. If I were wrecking corn and then putting it back, I agree that would be totally bad and I will never be that person. But I really think checking quickly to make sure there are no obvious defects is also normal and acceptable, and some grocery stores even have bins near the corn area for people to shuck into.

Anyway, I don't wanna highjack this thread with my corn drama, but I do welcome other people weighing in.

I worked in a produce department a lonnnnggg time ago. I think it's fine to check your produce out before you buy it. The reason why there are bins out is solely because people just rip through corn like mad men - not because it should be a common practice. It does ruin it if you take pretty much the whole ear out and don't buy it. I just don't see lifting the husk all the way down to the bottom to check. Like I said, it's peak season. I got four ears the other day and didn't check them - they were perfect. Peeling it down halfway without disrupting the way it looks is not something that I would frown upon. Peeling it all the way down to the bottom makes it undesirable to someone else. I can see it from that lady's point of view. You took the ones you checked...so she can kiss it.

bella2210 · July 2015

My boss, though I like him, was a bit of a TW. I am celebrating my 30th birthday on Wednesday and when he asked how old I was and I said 30 he said, "funny, you don't look that old." I know he meant that as a compliment but clearly didn't think it all the way through.

Lemonpig1 · July 2015

@KaraEpp16 Thanks for the perspective! I definitely only peel down an inch or so to check the top rows of kernels, not ever a whole strip like you're describing. I agree that nobody should be doing anything to stuff they don't end up buying that makes it unbuyable or even less attractive to anyone else. That's just nowhere near what I was doing!

Anyway, you're just gonna have to take my word for it that this lady had twatwaffle written all over her regardless

sherks11 · July 2015

Can I say that dd is being a tiny bit of a TW? Is that wrong of me??

Oh well, it's more of just an annoyance anyway. She keeps stealing everyone's shoes and hiding them all over the place! I keep finding them in random cabinets! Drives me nuts!!!

Lljbean · July 2015

Can I say that, "Corn Drama" just made me crack up so hard.

ChelseyBels · July 2015

Lemonpig1 · July 2015

@ChelseyBels hold up who gave you permission to post a picture of me on the internet???

indibidule · July 2015

Paige6410 · July 2015

Oh damn, I was saving something for TWT and totally forgot until this twatty male coworker posted on FB and got me in a rage again. I already do not like this guy, so it probably made the situation worse. He is a massive twatwaffle because of this interaction on Friday night.

I was bartending/managing and he was serving. He went to turn his money and server report over to me at the end of his shift and then it happened....
TW: "So, how far are you now?"
Me: "15 weeks."
TW: "You gain any weight yet?"
Me: "Uh, yeah....?"
TW: "Oh. Double digits?"
Me: "No."

Snoopylovesbelle · July 2015

Paige6410 said:
Oh damn, I was saving something for TWT and totally forgot until this twatty male coworker posted on FB and got me in a rage again. I already do not like this guy, so it probably made the situation worse. He is a massive twatwaffle because of this interaction on Friday night.

I was bartending/managing and he was serving. He went to turn his money and server report over to me at the end of his shift and then it happened....
TW: "So, how far are you now?"
Me: "15 weeks."
TW: "You gain any weight yet?"
Me: "Uh, yeah....?"
TW: "Oh. Double digits?"
Me: "No."

Omg did you kill him? I would have asked if it's a good idea to enrage the person who is handling your money etc. What an idiot

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