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December 2015 Moms
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The dumbest advice you've been getting

ChiccoBeanzChiccoBeanz member
in December 2015 Moms
Alright Ladies, 
   We are reaching the half way mark. What stupid advice have you been given? Let's share some laughs. This is totally for fun, so please no MUD. Thanks in advance. 


Most recent: 
 Me: My doc said I may need an amniocentisis. 
DH's friend's baby mama: Oh NO! You can't do that! They'll kill the baby! Don't be stupid.
Me: What are you talking about? 
DH's friend's baby mama: They put a needle in the baby's spine and can kill it! What if he moves?
Me: I don't think that's how that works. Honey calm down. We don't have to do the test ( because now DH is yelling: We are NOT doing that!)
DH's friend's baby mama: Don't be stupid. That's crazy to do. It will kill your baby. Nah uh
Me: My mom had an amnio with me....and here I am 27 years later....

The rest of the convo was stupid too... lol then I contacted my bump ladies and asked for advice and looked up amnio videos for my own piece of mind and DH's. He stopped panicking now. lol
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Re: The dumbest advice you've been getting

  • CMDDCMDD member
    I don't have any good stories but I love yours. A needle in the baby's spine...!
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  • ChiccoBeanzChiccoBeanz member
    @CMDD I'm glad I could give you a good giggle. She just got a  look from me 
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  • Mizuiro007Mizuiro007 member
    Than fully I haven't been subjected to bad advice but when my son was about ten days old I got to sit through the longest list of questions asked by my little cousin. They included how long did it take to grow his hair, what where the white things (zits) on his nose, how long had he been walking, was he ticklish, did he laugh. Then he topped off the questions with a comment on how funny it would have been if he'd come out a girl and he laughed for several minutes over it. Uhm....okay...
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  • garrettnrgarrettnr member
    One of my classmates, whom I do not get along with , started giving me all sorts of advice.

    Please note this is my fourth pregnancy and she has one child.

    First she told me to stop eating my candy bar because it will make not only me fat but my baby as well! Also , that the baby will be addicted to milky ways if I do not stop . Really ??? Lol

    Second thing she asked was if it was my husbands baby . Hmm... I ignored her . This chick just kept going about how bad it will be for the child and that we should divorce now . Lol . She doesn't know me not my husband or our situation. What an assumption .

    Third thing that just through my for a loop was she asked if it was a boy or girl and I told her I was waiting . I ended up with a 5 minute lecture on how it wasn't safe for the baby not to know the sex and how could I choose to wait in this day and age .

    Yeah. I am so glad this course is over in a week, and I can block her number . Sadly she was a group member in my course project and we exchanged numbers the first day of class.
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  • LeggoxMyxPreggoLeggoxMyxPreggo member
    I went to the beach last week and we were all packing up. I had my little beach bag on my shoulder and went to grab the cooler (its a 6qt cooler and mostly just slushy water with some fruit in it) and some random stranger GRABBED my arm and nearly yelled at me "are you crazy?!?! You're going to miscarriage!" and proceeded to lecture both me and my family.

    We are not patient people. I lost my temper and said some regrettable things but wtf...who just grabs a stranger?
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  • lynettieLoolynettieLoo member
    LeggoxMyxPreggo said:
    I went to the beach last week and we were all packing up. I had my little beach bag on my shoulder and went to grab the cooler (its a 6qt cooler and mostly just slushy water with some fruit in it) and some random stranger GRABBED my arm and nearly yelled at me "are you crazy?!?! You're going to miscarriage!" and proceeded to lecture both me and my family. We are not patient people. I lost my temper and said some regrettable things but wtf...who just grabs a stranger?

    My parents did this to me. I went to pick up a 12 pack of cokes and had a 6 pack of 12 oz cokes in the other hand. I was told to drop them because I'm pregnant and shouldn't be picking things up... Like seriously I'm pregnant not dying.
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  • taysuntaysun member
    kidcapri100 said:

    Oh boy.. I've had some interesting ones (mostly from my MIL or friend's mothers):

    Never reach above your head or the cord will get wrapped around the baby's neck.

    Don't eat pineapple, mango or watermelon because it's bad for the baby.

    Flying is bad for the baby.

    I should really be in bed as much as possible because that's best for the baby.

    Don't drink cold beverages because it can contract the uterus - only drink warm to hot beverages.

    I should really only gain 10lbs with my pregnancy. Anything else is unnecessary. (Um I have a BMI of about 17%...)

    It's bad luck to have a baby shower before the baby arrives.

    It's also bad luck to put together a nursery or buy anything for the baby before it arrives - so basically you should just scramble to do everything AFTER the baby comes home bc that makes so much sense...including buying a car seat.

    Ultrasounds can harm the baby. Best to only have one per pregnancy. (I'm high risk and have weekly u/s...)

    You shouldn't really eat for two, rather just eat for one and a half. So take your normal meal portion and add another half serving to everything. (Im pretty sure it's only 300-500 calories..per day!)

    Fruit will give you GD. Best to avoid.

    The baby will suck all of the calcium out of your body which can lead to you losing teeth.

    It's safe to fly with a baby after 1 week.

    If you play classical music for the baby it will make him smarter..

    Hmmm that's all I can think of now but I will update as more come through!

    I just want to point out that those of Jewish faith do not have a baby shower and do not have anything for baby in home before birth as it is considered bad luck. So it's not exactly silly advice, it just maybe doesn't apply to you.
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  • stephaniearthursstephaniearthurs member
    @kidcapri100

    I wanted to point out that both my mom and my MIL lost all of their teeth after pregnancy and now wear dentures. I can't remember all of the details that lead my MIL, but I'm pretty sure my hubby said carrying twins did it to her (but I/he could be wrong). For my mom that was the issue, but she was 40 when she had my youngest brother, so I'm pretty sure that didn't help!
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  • BCIndychickBCIndychick member
    I went to visit my great grandmother last Friday. I am out of work. Not by choice. I am actively seeking new employment. She starts lecturing me saying that it's just not right to make women work throughout their pregnancies. She also doesn't want me to paint the baby bed. I am staining it. I'm sure if I sat there much longer she would have us much more to say.
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  • cdv2015cdv2015 member
    I used to get unsolicited advice from mil and her mother.

    With my first: "my grandbaby will NOT wear anything (second hand)"
    -ummm... are you committing to buying her whole wardrobe forever and ever amen? They outgrow things way too fast to turn anything down.

    Now that I have had more children than anyone in our immediate family excluding my mama), I don't hear too much advice from anyone. I'm a pro at this point.

    Then I hear the whole "eating for two" nonsense all the time from random people. I started out slightly overweight, but don't look as much as I weigh. I eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm full. I gained 15 with my first and 20 with my second. This girl isn't trying to lose a whole lot at Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year. Let's aim for healthy!
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  • littleSkittle14littleSkittle14 member
    One coworker told me last time to "be sure to birth vaginally" because that was best for the baby's immune system.

    Gahhhh
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  • cdv2015cdv2015 member
    edited July 2015
    littleSkittle14 said:

    One coworker told me last time to "be sure to birth vaginally" because that was best for the baby's immune system.

    Gahhhh

    Because a vagina has magical immunity powers! If your "front hiney" has so many germs that it gives your child a better immune system from the exposure of just passing through it, you may need to wash it.
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  • grkgdss00grkgdss00 member
    My brother's gf brought gourmet cupcakes to his birthday yesterday, one of them was coffee flavored... she passed it to me and said "oh wait, you can't have coffee..." better believe I snatched that cupcake
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  • celainevcelainev member
    I also want to point out that my grandmother lost all her teeth in her 4th and 5th pregnancy, which both ended in miscarriage. :( My MIL is a dental hygienist and says that this can happen without proper care.

    But on the other hand, my MIL is a bit crazy and told me that boys are very different than girls, because boys will automatically know what to do with toy trains, while girls will just copy what boys do. I wanted to slap her. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. (This was because she didn't want us to give my DH's old Brio set to our baby if it is a girl. I told her no matter the sex, the baby is getting that Brio set.)
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  • Mands1010Mands1010 member
    dont run while pregnant. I began running seriously back in october, and ran my first half marathon at 8 weeks before I told anyone I was pregnant. As soon as family (grandmother) found at at 12 weeks, the first thing she told me is to not run. very frustrurating!

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  • kidcapri100kidcapri100 member
    @taysun Oh absolutely! I have many Jewish friends and agree that's tradition and definitely not silly in that context. Sorry I should have clarified. This was advice from someone who was not Jewish and literally told me I shouldn't even buy a car seat, bassinet, etc "because you never know what could happen during birth".

    @chaelainev Oh my I'm so sorry to hear that! I actually asked my dentist about this because I was very concerned after my MIL told me the baby takes calcium and that can contribute to losing teeth (I'm borderline obsessed with dental hygiene..) My dentist said that the baby doesn't take calcium from your body, but what can happen is that stomach acid from morning sickness, acid reflux, etc can weaken the teeth and lead to dental issues during pregnancy for sure! So, some non-silly good advice would be to brush and floss often during pregnancy, even more so if you have any issue that could cause acid on your teeth!
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  • samcneelsamcneel member
    We're moving next month out of state and I'm starting a new job, even though I will only be working for about 4 months before the baby gets here. A lot of my current, mostly older, coworkers think I should not go back to work until after the baby comes, and that I need to "rest". What the hell am I supposed to do for the next 4 months?! I thought it was hilarious, this is the 21st century, and babies aren't cheap so yes I am going to work and yes I will have a 12 week leave just like almost everyone else. I'm getting really tired of hearing it and don't think I can be nice about it anymore
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  • momotheflyinglemurmomotheflyinglemur member
    @mizurio007 How old was this cousin b/c these questions coming from anyone like 8 or younger is absolutely adorable.

    @laceyglowacki I am 22 and my SO is 27 and we are facing the same from a couple members of our family. They are very religious, though, and believe that me giving birth out of wedlock will bring shame on our family for generations to come. 

    @taysun Religious superstitions and/or beliefs do not really constitute good advice, because if that was the case, my aunt believes that I should not go out of the house on a full moon, new moon, or half moon because it will pull my uterus like it does the tides. 


    Some advice that I have heard personally that was dumb and/or terrible:

    Don't pick that up!!! That is a big one!

    You have to tell everyone whether you're having a boy or a girl, it's not fair to keep that a secret. -Random coworker. Oh yeah, you totally have as much right as my SO and family to know what the sex of the creature growing in my stomach.

    You shouldn't drink that Dr. Pepper. -cashier at a fast food restaurant. Just shut up!

    You should really not be around while I am smoking. -a coworker with an ecig. Really? Then don't smoke it inside near my desk, you asshole!!!
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  • BubbzBubbz member
    cdv2015 said:
    One coworker told me last time to "be sure to birth vaginally" because that was best for the baby's immune system. Gahhhh
    Because a vagina has magical immunity powers! If your "front hiney" has so many germs that it gives your child a better immune system from the exposure of just passing through it, you may need to wash it.
    Well--there may be some truth to this, actually. There are studies they are doing now to see if the greater exposure to microbes in a vaginal birth helps the child develop a stronger immune system alter on.

    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3110651/

    Is heartily apologizing to her child in advance for genes that predispose them to shitty vision and being Too Damn Tall.
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  • Mizuiro007Mizuiro007 member
    @momotheflyinglemur I believe he was 10 at the time, almost 11. His grams (my aunt) was sitting there the whole giving him odd looks. Some of the questions were pretty interesting.
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  • taysuntaysun member
    @momotheflyinglemur I still think it can be offensive to say that particular custom is bad advice. Not having a shower or having baby items in the home is no where near being bad advice. The fact that you're comparing that tradition to your aunt's beliefs is ridiculous.
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  • Mizuiro007Mizuiro007 member
    edited July 2015
    taysun said:

    @momotheflyinglemur I still think it can be offensive to say that particular custom is bad advice. Not having a shower or having baby items in the home is no where near being bad advice. The fact that you're comparing that tradition to your aunt's beliefs is ridiculous.

    Wasn't there a mom on here a while back posting about not wanting baby things around until the baby was born after previous having a late term miscarriage? I believe she was asking advice on dealing with family and friends asking to buy things for the baby. This had nothing to do with tradition or religion.

    *My brother and SIL have mentioned this same thing after having a foster child they tried to adopt and lost. It's extremely painful dealing with those things after a loss.
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  • cdv2015cdv2015 member
    edited July 2015
    Bubbz said:


    cdv2015 said:

    littleSkittle14 said:

    One coworker told me last time to "be sure to birth vaginally" because that was best for the baby's immune system.

    Gahhhh

    Because a vagina has magical immunity powers! If your "front hiney" has so many germs that it gives your child a better immune system from the exposure of just passing through it, you may need to wash it.

    Well--there may be some truth to this, actually. There are studies they are doing now to see if the greater exposure to microbes in a vaginal birth helps the child develop a stronger immune system alter on.

    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3110651/



    I just can't with this... I know you aren't being offensive. Don't take anything I am about to say personally. It is just this "study".

    My kids lived in the same exact environment as kids who came out of a vag. Now, because I was unable to deliver this way, I should feel guilt because harm may have been done to an immune system? All because their body didn't go through a birth canal. A whole six inch missed opportunity to expose my kids to some good ol' vagina germs. I must go apologize to them NOW for their asthma, crohns, etc. Wait a second... they actually DON'T have those issues.


    ETA: I repeat, this is toward the ARTICLE, not pp.
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  • momotheflyinglemurmomotheflyinglemur member
    edited July 2015
    taysun said: @momotheflyinglemur I still think it can be offensive to say that particular custom is bad advice. Not having a shower or having baby items in the home is no where near being bad advice. The fact that you're comparing that tradition to your aunt's beliefs is ridiculous.


    _____
    In my aunt's branch of Islam the moon tradition is as legitimate as the Jewish one. I never said "bad" advice. I said "Religious superstitions and/or beliefs do not really constitute good advice." I was not trying to be offensive, which is why I put forth my own family's religious belief in comparison to the Jewish belief. Two legitimate religions which have every right to their customs and beliefs, but that doesn't mean that to SOME people those things feel dumb.

    What works for one person may not work for another, everyone knows that. Plus, this is a thread discussing the dumbest, silliest, or most ridiculous advice that you have been given, so hoping on this thread is basically asking to be offended. 

    @Mizuiro007 I don't remember reading that thread but that woman has every right to not want things in her house. I would understand and empathize with her about it.
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  • ChiccoBeanzChiccoBeanz member
    momotheflyinglemur said:
    taysun said:
    @momotheflyinglemur I still think it can be offensive to say that particular custom is bad advice. Not having a shower or having baby items in the home is no where near being bad advice. The fact that you're comparing that tradition to your aunt's beliefs is ridiculous.



    _____
    In my aunt's branch of Islam the moon tradition is as legitimate as the Jewish one. I never said "bad" advice. I said "Religious superstitions and/or beliefs do not really constitute good advice." I was not trying to be offensive, which is why I put forth my own family's religious belief in comparison to the Jewish belief. Two legitimate religions which have every right to their customs and beliefs, but that doesn't mean that to SOME people those things feel dumb.

    What works for one person may not work for another, everyone knows that. Plus, this is a thread discussing the dumbest, silliest, or most ridiculous advice that you have been given, so hoping on this thread is basically asking to be offended. 

    @Mizuiro007 I don't remember reading that thread but that woman has every right to not want things in her house. I would understand and empathize with her about it.


    I think this is a matter of perspective and then opinion. To each her own. I'm Puerto Rican, amongst other things, and baby showers are more popular to do in the main land then they are on the island. It is considered bad luck to have a shower before the baby is born. People will do as they please though. Also, many people may find that to be a stupid thing to do, as one would think the parent(s) would want everything before the baby is born. But again, it is a matter of perspective and opinion. 
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  • momotheflyinglemurmomotheflyinglemur member
    @Jonesy288 Absolutely!
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  • JmdavinJmdavin member
    LOVE my Grandma, but she literally told me that breastfeeding was "disgusting" and "unnatural" and when she had kids the nurses gave her a shot and bound her breasts to stop her milk flow.

    To each their own, of course, on their choice to BF but I was like well grandma...pretty sure breast feeding isn't "unnatural" as no human (or mammal for that matter!) would have ever survived without it...

    She jokingly said she'll love my baby like crazy but not to breast feed around her bc it makes her sick. I'm like hah okkkkkk
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  • ashleyannhaynesashleyannhaynes member
    We're Jewish and I had to basically tell my MIL to stop lecturing me about bringing baby things inside the house. If you don't want to throw a shower or anything because of superstitions, fantastic. But I cannot imagine bringing the baby home to nothing and scrambling to get everything around, religion or otherwise. For all practical purposes, I agree that it's ridiculous but hey, to each their own! 
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  • Catherine1021Catherine1021 member
    My parents said I should refuse all ultrasounds because they cause autism. 

    And maybe this isn't usually considered dumb advice- but I got really tired of hearing it anyway. People would ask how I was feeling, and I would tell them I went to the hospital after 2 days and nights of non-stop vomiting, and that now that vomiting is only controlled because I take medication for it. Then I would get a response of something like- you should keep crackers by your bed and eat them before you get up in the morning, that will stop you from throwing-up. Well I'm glad that worked for them, but considering how frequently I was vomiting, and that I was waking up in the middle of the night and vomiting without even getting out of bed, it seems silly to think they had a better solution than my doctor- and that it was crackers.
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  • erikaalzeterikaalzet member
    Pre-pregnancy I was very baby-leery. So, I haven't been getting much advise. Just a lot of "are you going to know what to do with her?" foolishness. I know that those who have said it meant it in jest, but it is usually met with a blunt comment or a sarcastic counter question.
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  • tralalablahtralalablah member
    edited July 2015
    cdv2015 said:

    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3110651/

    I just can't with this... I know you aren't being offensive. Don't take anything I am about to say personally. It is just this "study". My kids lived in the same exact environment as kids who came out of a vag. Now, because I was unable to deliver this way, I should feel guilt because harm may have been done to an immune system? All because their body didn't go through a birth canal. A whole six inch missed opportunity to expose my kids to some good ol' vagina germs. I must go apologize to them NOW for their asthma, crohns, etc. Wait a second... they actually DON'T have those issues. ETA: I repeat, this is toward the ARTICLE, not pp.
    You do know this is a peer-reviewed article in a medical journal on the National Institute of Health website, right? Also, children are young. I certainly hope yours live long disease-free lives, but this is a real concern of the medical community and statistically it does increase these diseases. I don't know why you put the word study in quotes.
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  • stephaniearthursstephaniearthurs member
    My mom is funny! She thought I was insane for being careful of what I eat, and informered me that she smoked through her whole pregnant with me (thanks!) but said I can't put my laptop on my lap or go through the body scan machines at the air port because it's dangerous! Also, she's anti-vax (but not when we were kids, just now)
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  • Caligurl858Caligurl858 member
    edited July 2015
    Russian family members with their current doctors don't eat things things while breastfeeding. I still want to confirm this with my OB because it just sounds so crazy.

    You can't eat cucumbers for fear of hurting the baby through your breast milk . And nothing that is red ( tomatoes, bell peppers, ... Anything that is naturally red ) or your baby will definitely have an allergic reaction .

    I cal bullshit but have yet to confirm with my OB. This is still prescribed by their doctors people.

    Oh and my personal favorite: epidurals will make me harm my baby. From pushing her out to hard
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  • Gingermom15Gingermom15 member
    To stop withholding his name from family and friend because he won't know who he is when he's born. We're not telling certain people his name because they think it's ok to give us unsolicited, rude opinions followed by what they would name their child.
    "How could you ever consider that name in this day and age? If I loved my child I would name him Jase in today's world". As said by boyfriends mother. Just shut yo face, lady.
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