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What in laws say!

PSMITH1286PSMITH1286 member
in May 2015 Moms
what do your in laws or family members say that drive you nuts? Pretty sure this has been started, but I needed to start it again.

I hate it when I walk in and my MIL says "there's my baby!" No she's mine. I carried her for 9 months and went through all the work. It drives me nuts to hear her talk to other people able our daughter to. She always refers to her as "her baby" and not her granddaughter. I've corrected her and several members of her family several times. But nothing has changed. Rant over
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Re: What in laws say!

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  • caseheelacaseheela member
    I'm just a 'womb donor'.
    Add rice cereal to a bottle at night to get her to sleep longer. (We breastfeed with an occasional bottle if I'm not around).
    We started juice with my youngest at 4 months.
    Formula at night will get her to sleep longer.
    Baby yoga really helps the joints (as she's stretching my 2 week old to the point of discomfort).
    I would like it if you covered the baby while breastfeeding it's inappropriate.
    Are the boobies away?
    And she stuck her finger in my babes mouth on Sunday when she yawned.
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  • ltcamacholtcamacho member
    caseheela said:

    I'm just a 'womb donor'.
    Add rice cereal to a bottle at night to get her to sleep longer. (We breastfeed with an occasional bottle if I'm not around).
    We started juice with my youngest at 4 months.
    Formula at night will get her to sleep longer.
    Baby yoga really helps the joints (as she's stretching my 2 week old to the point of discomfort).
    I would like it if you covered the baby while breastfeeding it's inappropriate.
    Are the boobies away?
    And she stuck her finger in my babes mouth on Sunday when she yawned.

    Who called you a womb donor?? That's just awful. I'm sorry!
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  • justkeeptryingjustkeeptrying member
    MIL has decided to call my son "Pookie". I have no problem with little nicknames but her reasoning for calling him this is pissing me off. Her cousin (who is her best friend) calls her own granddaughter Pookie. So she wants to call HER grandson Pookie. Ummmm why would you pick the EXACT SAME NICKNAME?! And to make matters worse, she is trying to get the nickname to catch on. She refers to him as Pookie on facebook so now all of her friends think this is his nickname!!!

    They got this name from a series of books for babies. She gave DS one so he knows where he got his "nickname". It's the worst book I've ever read. Here's a summary: "What's wrong little Pookie? Are you tired? No. Are you hungry? No. Are you thirsty? No." And so on and so forth for the entire book. So basically it teaches my child to say the word "No". Let's just say this book is going on the top shelf in hopes that DS won't want to read it if he can't reach it.

    Agh!!!!!
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  • ltcamacholtcamacho member
    Nice one! ;)
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  • BrooksManorBrooksManor member
    He likes nana. He smiles for me because he misses me and likes me better. After mentioning he doesn't smile for me often. Pfffttt.
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  • PSMITH1286PSMITH1286 member
    Oh ladies I feel your pain. Everything you guys are saying is my MIL made over. Why are MIL so annoying.
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  • macyginmommamacyginmomma member
    Calling him "my little bundle" I have no idea why it bothers me so much! It's like nails on a chalkboard
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  • DMELDMEL member
    He's "grandmas boy", or "grandmas angel" or if I say he was cranky, "he just misses grandma"
    It's so obnoxious.
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  • danibonellodanibonello member
    Omg I'm in the same boat as all of you!! What IS it with the MILs???? It's no secret that my MIL was a horrible mother... so why the hell does she think I'd take all of her unsolicited advice!?!?
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  • LadyBloodLadyBlood member
    I have almost all the same issue listed above, except it's from my mom. My MIL is wonderful, my mom is the worst!! We've never asked her for advice yet she tells me to have him sleep on his belly, to give him water between feedings (even though we feed on demand), when I saw her last I told her he was fussy (we had just traveled 4.5 hours) and he was sleeping and she still dragged him out of his carseat saying "he just wants grandma", everytime I bring him down and take him over to her house she jokes around saying "ok you can leave now", and then she completely disrespect my wishes about not holding him unless washing her hands and changing clothes because she smokes. My MIL on the other hand, gives me space and allows me to do what I need to do, she asks if she can help, rather than just forcing her help (she is the best at bouncing my son, probably cuz she has 4 kids lol, she was the only one who could calm him while we were camping over the 4th of July weekend) and she gives advice in a not so forceful way or when asked. I feel sorry that you guys dislike your MILS so much
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  • orangecurlsorangecurls member
    My MIL is great, so considerate and thoughtful. It is my FIL who has an opinion on everything. For example, he thinks our LO is too fussy in the evening. And he has all sorts of suggestions: formula, camomile tea with honey, whisky, just letting him cry- it's good for the lungs, etc. ugh.
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  • SmrBrd2012SmrBrd2012 member
    "Oh he looks more and more like (DH) every day!!!" She makes sure to say this every single time she sees him...he does look a lot like him but he looks like me too!

    Also, before he started smiling for real, every time she held him and he did happen to smile (gas/sleeping), she would say "oh he's smiling at me!!" Even though I would explain that he hasn't had a real smile yet, then she'd just point it out again. They aren't real smiles, lady!
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  • Hawk&EyeHawk&Eye member
    My MIL has some serious anxiety issues that she projects onto my boys. Ds1 had a stuffy nose and she "was up all night worried sick". DS2 was fussy and she called all her friends and the calls me up saying, " I talked to so and so and she said..." I was going to a baby wearing meeting and it had been raining pretty hard and "I was up all night worrying if you should go." It's insane and to make matters worse ds1 seems to pick up on it and now every time he doesn't want to do something he's "so sick".
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  • danibonellodanibonello member
    Wow this is so my MIL! We were at her house last weekend to visit and have dinner, and i put LO down for a nap in the guest bedroom, on the bed with pillows around her, even though she can't roll or anything. This bedroom is 10 feet from the dining room table. The next day MIL tells me she's going to buy a pack n play so that LO can nap in the dining room while we eat because she's just "So worried about her, that poor little thing, and needs to be able to see her". It pissed me off because she's basically insinuating that I either don't know what I'm doing or I don't care enough about the well being of my daughter. The kid needs rest, shes not going to get it in the dining room with obnoxious conversation, etc. Stop worrying so much about my kid and start worrying about yourself!!
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  • mars8kmars8k member
    I hate that high picted screachy voice she uses to talk to DD, and shea makes that kissing sound that DD hates and is scared of! I keep telling her but she doesn't care

    I also hate how she just barges in uninvited and bring all her other grand kids, call me crazy but i don't like people around when i'm changing DD, and she calls on the kids "come watch the baby getting changed" like it's a freaking show!
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  • mrscimino914mrscimino914 member
    mars8k said:

    I hate that high picted screachy voice she uses to talk to DD, and shea makes that kissing sound that DD hates and is scared of! I keep telling her but she doesn't care.

    Omg my MIL does the same annoying high pitched voice and I can't take it. I haven't said anything because I feel like I'd be a bitch but stop the baby voice. She also calls her chubbsy and that pisses me off even if she's kidding. Also if the babies in her swing and starts to cry she'll say oh are you crying because no one likes you. Well I like you!!! I'll take you. Like what the hell why would you say that. She also gets mad I like to take care of my daughter which I don't understand. My husband and I will take a break and go on a date when needed but I'm on maternity leave and will be returning back to work and so I want to get as much time with her as possible and she hates that I do that. It's like I'm her mother or something lol. She'll also yell at the baby if she starts crying in her arms saying she can't cry in her arms to cry in mine !!! Wtf I'm going crazy here
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  • cassietegtmeiercassietegtmeier member
    My & DH had commented how we wanted to get our LO a activity saucer but with me not working money was tight so we were waiting. She called tonight to let me know she got one to keep at her house for when my LO is over. Gee thanks.
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  • babinantebabinante member
    My FIL is just weird around kids in general he teases them too much, wants to take them without car seats, try's to parent them and with babies he makes these odd noises that scares them and calls my baby GIRL buzz saw...what in the world?!
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  • vaguilloryvaguillory member
    edited July 2015
    I'm realizing that I'm easily triggered by my MIL and I will definitely find something to be irritated by if I'm looking for it. That being said, I HATE it when she pulls this competitive BS with my mother (though hasn't been brave enough to say anything to my mother's face) because of her own insecurity, when she makes comments that have had a clear theme of hoping for lighter/Caucasian features to develop in my son (my husband is white and I'm multiracial) who has inherited my olive skin and dark hair with curls developing, and when she claims she wants to come over and help but really only wstches tv and holds the baby while he sleeps. She's never changed a diaper or made a bottle, and says it's "mom's job." I can't wait to throw that back at her if she ever hints at him spending a day or overnight with her. :D
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  • agilber3agilber3 member
    I have a great relationship with my MIL and she is wonderful. But when I we to my first ultrasound an hour before I left she told me they use radiation and that an a baby the size of an apple seed couldn't take that much... Lol!!

    Then my baby was sooo good for her and slept a long time and when I got to him he was fussy and crabby. When I asked if he was like that with her, "I never had to rock and dance with him." I know it was harmless but made me feel like I was doing something wrong!
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  • kmorris93kmorris93 member
    cassietegtmeier said:

    Everything that comes out of my mother in laws mouth drives me nuts.

    This!!! My favorite was I'm giving my LO pneumonia by taking him outside and bringing him back inside where it's cool. And when she calls him her little man I wanna punch her in the throat!
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  • courtneylevesquecourtneylevesque member
    My MIL calls my LO "my precious". She says it in the creepiest voice, it's like gtfo lady, this isn't Lord of the Rings!
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  • ltcamacholtcamacho member
    My MIL says "The queen is here!!" in the most obnoxious voice I've ever heard. She also jokingly acts like she's going to leave with DD every time she comes over. Uh...stop it.
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  • jodi1008jodi1008 member
    I am no longer with my ex but this is what his mother said to me when my 3yo was really young. So she's a huge lady and she would tell me my tiny baby was going to have a butt and thighs like her and her family! Who wishes that on a little baby.... Plus most babies have some rolls that young. Kind of left me speechless and now at 3 he's tall and skinny lol
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  • NPReed10NPReed10 member
    My FIL asked me why I was "forcing" my baby to do tummy time when they "never did that" for their grandson (who happens to be autistic).
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  • NPReed10NPReed10 member
    Oh, and my FIL also told me that my baby was warm yesterday when we had lunch outside & that caused such distress thats why she didn't poop yesterday...
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  • sarahm+jnyaysarahm+jnyay member
    My MIL has a mantra that is just like the one from The Help. She says it to DS every time she sees him within 2 minutes of being around him. Then she's crying because he is so cute. It's not a bad thing that she loves him so much but for the love of science woman, get it together! Lol she cries more than me and I'm the one with all the hormones.
    She also steals my phone and goes through my pictures and sends the one she likes to herself. Wtf? Privacy means nothing to her.
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  • cassietegtmeiercassietegtmeier member
    sarahm+jnyay said:

    My MIL has a mantra that is just like the one from The Help. She says it to DS every time she sees him within 2 minutes of being around him. Then she's crying because he is so cute. It's not a bad thing that she loves him so much but for the love of science woman, get it together! Lol she cries more than me and I'm the one with all the hormones.
    She also steals my phone and goes through my pictures and sends the one she likes to herself. Wtf? Privacy means nothing to her.

    I would google images of boobs and leave one of those in with my pics, maybe that would stop her from looking without asking!
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  • gkrenzelgkrenzel member
    Ugh I feel you ladies! I could go on forever about MIL, but most recent was her calling a photo of LO "unflattering " (chubby tummy was showing). Ummm, she's 8 weeks old.

    She also shows no interest in holding DD unless her friends are around to show off to. We were in town last weekend for my sister's grad party and she kept telling me to drive to her friends house (at 11pm) to show them the baby. They were so sad that I'm "taking her away and [they] never see her" (we're moving soon).


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  • Erica414Erica414 member
    My MIL always refers to my son as hers as well and it absolutely drives me nuts!! But no matter what u tell her she didn't listen.... I stopped correcting her.
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  • aurora1204aurora1204 member
    I have a unique reply here.....had a MIL from Hades in my previous marriage. When she watched my daughters she would dip their pacifiers in syrup to make them accept them and insisted on re-washing their clothes in regular detergent so "they could get used to it". With current LO; we are not married and his mother is Catholic.... She has never spoken to me; met me or seen this child; however gets pictures from my significant other and posts them all over social media calling him nicknames and her precious grandson. I'm sorry but Eff You.
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  • LadyBloodLadyBlood member
    ali0608 said:

    OK. I have to respond. Ever since I found out that my second baby is another boy, I realized I will never have a girl and be the mother of the bride and I will always be the "dreaded mother in law" that you all despise. These vents have made me sad. If you have a son, he's going to find someone someday and possibly have babies as well. Do you want their significant other to treat you the same? Why are you so possessive of you little ones? Share them with their grandparents! They are excited! I don't know. Some of these vents aren't that bad. (I will agree that some of these are terrible! )

    I'm not trying to cause controversy. Maybe I'm just venting because I won't ever have a daughter to be close with when they have a baby. I have 2 boys and I hope I can be close to them and their entire families when they get to that point. From all your vents, I will make sure not too call their baby "my baby."

    Anyone else see my point?

    I'm with you, also mom to a baby boy. But honestly I love my MIL, I hang out with her willingly more than I see my mother. So I don't understand all the negativity against MIL's the crazy ones I get, but a lot of these are harmless. Maybe it's mom hormones blowing things out of proportion.
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  • prplzprplz member
    Well it really irritates me when my MIL is constantly checking her eyes every single time she see's her or asks when she's on the phone and hoping they will change color (i have green eyes, DH has brown) saying that if she does get green eyes they will throw a party like what? Just because she will have brown eyes she deserves less?
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  • DMELDMEL member
    My post was about my own mom not MIL. I have a fabulous relationship with my mil actually and as s boy mama, hope to have the same one day.
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  • lombardo21lombardo21 member
    I thought I was alone in this struggle. These posts make me feel so much better!!! She constantly holds my baby, when she is around the only time I get to hold him is when I'm nursing him. If for some reason I have him she will take him out of my arms. She always wants to watch the baby and will tell me to pump and to go out. Or she doesn't understand why Im listening to the doctors about the beach all her kids were fine, I could go on and on
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  • lombardo21lombardo21 member
    I never liked my MIL she is a self centered person who thinks her way is the only way. She doesn't know boundaries either. I have a son & I hope to never be like her. I think an annoying mother in law is not only
    Annoying with the baby, but a crappy person just in general. We never received a wedding gift or my father currently has cancer & needs an organ transplant-she never asks about how he is doing or how I am doing. She not sensitive to what I value as a mother.
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  • justkeeptryingjustkeeptrying member
    @ali0608 - thank you for your comment. I appreciate what you said and as a FTM to a DS it has put a new perspective on things for me.

    I have a good relationship with my MIL but have struggled since DS was born. I think my main frustration which has resulted in way bigger annoyances is that I had the baby blues really bad for the first 3 weeks and she did not get it. At all. She would come over saying she was coming to help me and the would sit on her butt and do nothing while I cleaned the kitchen. She was being extremely overbearing but not in a helpful way. I kept trying to put on a brave face, but all I wanted to do was cry. And that's what I would do as soon as she left. Now that my baby blues are over, I am holding a lot of resentment towards her for not being more supportive. Maybe I need to just get over it.

    I hope that all of these stories are reminders to us when our LO's have children one day. Wow. Hard to imagine that ever happening!!
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