watching DH with LO is super cute. when in the car, DH will try to check on him with every single noise he makes. we were in the living trying to watch a show while LO slept in the bedroom and DH kept getting up to check on him. any time he starts crying DH will pick him up and sing to him or just snuggle him. got out of the bathroom yesterday and they were just cuddling skin to skin. it honestly has changed him and i think its so sweet to see.
Just a follow up to my rage post from early this AM: made hubby take the 630 feeding. Pushed that turd right out of bed. even though I only got another hour of sleep it was fantastic to feel like I wasn't the only one taking care of our child And guess what today he is alone with her for 5 hours while I work a short bar tending shift!
It must be nice to have a baby & never feed her, get up with her, or change her. I'm soooo fed up. I feel like a single mom. Which I basically am.
I hear ya!!!! I'm always the one to get up with LO and always the one to do the work I feel like. I'm so sick of hearing LO start to wake up in the middle of the night to eat and hubby just stays sleeping and never thinks to help and wake up to feed her. I'm so sick of him. He's usually such a great husband and now having our baby he does maybe 10% of the work. Otherwise when he has her he thinks it's just about holding her. And when she is awake and he has her he is on his phone or watching tv and not playing or making eye contact with her at all. Like dude do something! I'm so sick of him right now. But maybe that's because I've been doing all the feedings every night and he hasn't. AND we do formula and bottle feeding. He could easily do it himself at night.
Yesss!!!! That is exactly what is happening with me too! I have bottles that I pumped in the refrigerator & he doesn't even know how to warm them up! It's so ridiculous.
It must be nice to have a baby & never feed her, get up with her, or change her. I'm soooo fed up. I feel like a single mom. Which I basically am.
I hear ya!!!! I'm always the one to get up with LO and always the one to do the work I feel like. I'm so sick of hearing LO start to wake up in the middle of the night to eat and hubby just stays sleeping and never thinks to help and wake up to feed her. I'm so sick of him. He's usually such a great husband and now having our baby he does maybe 10% of the work. Otherwise when he has her he thinks it's just about holding her. And when she is awake and he has her he is on his phone or watching tv and not playing or making eye contact with her at all. Like dude do something! I'm so sick of him right now. But maybe that's because I've been doing all the feedings every night and he hasn't. AND we do formula and bottle feeding. He could easily do it himself at night.
Yesss!!!! That is exactly what is happening with me too! I have bottles that I pumped in the refrigerator & he doesn't even know how to warm them up! It's so ridiculous.
If my husband ever tried to play video games while I was caring for the baby after caring for her all day you better fucking believe I'd give him a verbal lashing he'd never forget. All it took was one "hey I feel like I'm doing this alone, I know you're new but I need you to step it up" and he hasn't looked back since. Then again I'm an asshole and he's probably afraid of me but...it works.
TTC: 1/2014
BFP: 9/24
EDD: 6/8/2015
Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
If my husband ever tried to play video games while I was caring for the baby after caring for her all day you better fucking believe I'd give him a verbal lashing he'd never forget. All it took was one "hey I feel like I'm doing this alone, I know you're new but I need you to step it up" and he hasn't looked back since. Then again I'm an asshole and he's probably afraid of me but...it works.
DH came home yesterday from being on duty for 2 days - his first duty period away from LO - and he leans in and says "you know, little buddy, I missed you a little bit" (which in DH speak means he missed him, period). And LO just goggled at him with big ol' eyes. It was way cute
I managed to lovingly call out DH on the fact that a) every time he's supposed to be taking care of LO and he cries, DH tries to hand him back. "I think he's hungry." No, dude, go change that diaper. and b) he wakes the baby to love on him, which is a pain in the butt for me.
I don't normally succeed in calling him out in a way that doesn't trigger a fight, so this was a miracle. And because it worked, it's become a running joke -and I can tell people about it to reinforce it. Suddenly DH doesn't hand me a screaming kid any more. And I can warn him not to wake the baby without causing a fight. (Yes, he still tries.)
Bonus: DH has started kissing me or rubbing my back, rather than the baby, when he gets that "wake him up and love on him" urge and I stop him. Yay!
During the 2am wake-up, baby pooped mid-feeding and we changed him. He then (of course) pooped again. DH says, "do you know what we call this?... Déjà POO!" It was pretty funny, but I'm not sure if that's just because we were exhausted 8-}
DH has been leaving me to care for LO 24/7 (almost). He takes him for about an hour or two when he comes home for work and I'm just super exhausted. Well, yesterday I was at a baby shower and I was asked to pick a number between 1-10. I responded with 17. We were all laughing until someone said "aw she's tired!" And then I started to cry. Felt like such a dork. DH was there and I think he finally realized how much i needed his help because last night he took care of LO until 4am! I feel so much better now!
DH has been leaving me to care for LO 24/7 (almost). He takes him for about an hour or two when he comes home for work and I'm just super exhausted. Well, yesterday I was at a baby shower and I was asked to pick a number between 1-10. I responded with 17. We were all laughing until someone said "aw she's tired!" And then I started to cry. Felt like such a dork. DH was there and I think he finally realized how much i needed his help because last night he took care of LO until 4am! I feel so much better now!
I feel you here! My DH pitches in but nothing to the amount of time I spend. Friday night he fed him at 11 and I got to sleep until from about 10 to 3 am (thank you baby). It was fabulous. I'm definitely more emotional and easily set off. It's like I save all patience for LO and have none left for DH.
We got both kids to nap at the same time yesterday (amazing by itself). When DS woke up, DH took him outside to let me sleep -2.5 hours! He brought in LO when she woke up and wanted to eat. It was amazing.
DH stayed up with LO (he didn't have to work last night) from 12am-6:30am and let me sleep undisturbed! He said he had a hard time, she kept crying even though he did everything he could to soothe her and calm her down. Guess who has a new found sense of appreciation for me??
i didnt eat much early in the day (first bit of food was at 10 am and (i totally paid for it) so DH put some stuff in containers for me so i can just grab them and have something with me. i feel bad though, he doesnt feeel he is doing enough to help, but by bringing things to me and making dinner and the things that he is doing are so helpful
Re: DH/SO rants and raves 7/6-7/12
we were in the living trying to watch a show while LO slept in the bedroom and DH kept getting up to check on him.
any time he starts crying DH will pick him up and sing to him or just snuggle him. got out of the bathroom yesterday and they were just cuddling skin to skin. it honestly has changed him and i think its so sweet to see.
And guess what today he is alone with her for 5 hours while I work a short bar tending shift!
I don't normally succeed in calling him out in a way that doesn't trigger a fight, so this was a miracle. And because it worked, it's become a running joke -and I can tell people about it to reinforce it. Suddenly DH doesn't hand me a screaming kid any more. And I can warn him not to wake the baby without causing a fight. (Yes, he still tries.)
Bonus: DH has started kissing me or rubbing my back, rather than the baby, when he gets that "wake him up and love on him" urge and I stop him. Yay!
i feel bad though, he doesnt feeel he is doing enough to help, but by bringing things to me and making dinner and the things that he is doing are so helpful