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December 2015 Moms
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Baby names rant

nmonty15nmonty15 member
in December 2015 Moms
Im so effing sick of people's opinions on my baby names that we're considering; also, people's god awful attempts to give us their hipster suggestions of what our babies names should be. DH and I had a beautiful baby girls name picked out (Adalyn Grace).. which everybody absolutely loved. Well we're having a boy...which of course we cant agree to save our lives on a boys name. We were thinking of the name Ronan initially, then I got some very nasty comments about the name Ronan (and these are coming from only a very small selection of people I thought it. Would be fun to share with) and started doubting that I should name a child that, and started not liking the name. After much more debate we actually agreed on the name Benjamin, which people are now texting me telling me I shouldn't name my child Benjamin because "everyone names their kids that", his initials will be BM, and Benji/Benny are nicknames for it and they're terrible...etc. now, I'm starting to doubt if that is a good name. It's like WTF...I don't want any more opinions. I'm done sharing this moment with people and am disgusted at how rude family can be right now. If you don't like the name I pick, please keep it to yourself. I'm pregnant and sensitive people...at 20 weeks and 4 days pregnant, I find myself to be more emotional than I've been my whole pregnancy, so now I'm just sitting here crying because of people's stupidity! Thank you in advance for tolerating my rant!!
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Re: Baby names rant

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  • nmonty15nmonty15 member
    Agreed! I've decided I'm no longer sharing with anyone except my sister Who could care less what the baby's name is because she's so excited. The sad thing is there's only four whole people I've share the name with including my sister. Good thing we still have 20 weeks to go!
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  • kristen2bkristen2b member
    With my firstborn I shared a name that we were considering and my super sweet (not sarcasm font) sister of all people said how horrible it was. We have completely different taste so at the time it didn't affect my decision either way but we ended up not naming her that anyway. Well it's now on the top of my list for this second one and I definitely won't be sharing it until the baby is born! Sorry your friends are being so blunt. It amazes me the things people think they're allowed to have and worse SHARE an opinion on!
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  • rainyday21rainyday21 member
    Ronan and Benjamin are both lovely names! Don't let the haters get you down. ;) Everyone has an opinion, but those don't matter when you've found the name you both just love.
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  • 12815AEEA12815AEEA member
    We aren't sharing our name choices with anyone for this reason. Everyone is content with calling our baby Peep (its nickname) until it's born. Forget what others say, when you see your baby you'll know exactly the name meant for him!
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  • herewegrowherewegrow member
    edited July 2015
    We decided on a name with our first DD and just put it on the baby invite without telling hardly anyone. We never got any negativity about it, except for my whiny mother, of course, because we didn't pick the name she preferred. Choose it and be confident or don't share your thoughts with others! People think they HAVE to give you the opinion on anything and everything. Good luck choosing!!
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  • chewie5990chewie5990 member
    This is the exact reason we decided not to discus any names with anyone! My DH and I have a list and we will decide without others opinions. We aren't waiting until the birth to tell the name but once we come to a decision we will tell people this is the name we decided no opinions on it needed. I really like both your boy names though! Ronan is very cute a little trendy right now but who cares! And I've always liked the name Benjamin.
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  • misamimamisamima member

    I don't know what it is, but people just lose their filter with pregnant women. It's the weirdest thing.

    I'm very pro "don't tell other people what you're naming your kid". We didn't tell a soul what name we picked with DD. It's a very uncommon biblical name and I just know people would have opinions on it. But they have no choice but to like it and accept it, and not talk crap about it, once baby is actually already born.

    With that said, I think Ronan and Benjamin are beautiful names.

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  • taysuntaysun member
    I like both names, not to mention I happen to think Benji is a great nickname, I had a college friend who went by that.
    At the end of the day, it's your kid! Pick a name you like!
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  • bbrady1031bbrady1031 member
    I think your names are amazing!!! DH and I played scramble lol!!!! We basically took our parents, grandparents, and great grandparents initials and used those letters to make our boys name! That way everyone is represented in the name, no one gets their feelings hurt, and it's unique :D
    We came up with Drake from the initials and Robert for the middle name for DH. Girls names we are torn between two names. But we'll figure that out when we find out on August 5th. Good luck!!! And you name that baby whatever your heart desires. Who gives a damn what other people think!!! The name has to mean something to you and DH!!!!
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  • Catherine1021Catherine1021 member
    When my brother and SIL were having their first child, I was at my parents' house when they told everyone the name they had chosen for their daughter. I was shocked when my dad started going on and on about how horrible it was! My other brother and SIL always refused to tell anyone any names they were considering until after the baby was born. This always irritated me a little bit, but after that incident with my dad, I understand why. Yesterday I told my best friend one name we like for a girl... and she was nice, but it was obvious she didn't care for the name. Now I'm starting to have doubts about that name, but it's a name that dh and I both really like. Anyway- I won't be discussing names with anyone else except dh until after the baby is born!
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  • kdoak2015kdoak2015 member
    I would stop sharing your names if people's opinions are bothering you that badly. I've shared my names with a few people but have decided to just keep them to myself going forward incase I change my mind.
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  • hardlyhannahhardlyhannah member
    I love the name Benjamin. One of my best friend named her son Bennet (similar nicknames) and we called him Benny Baby as soon as they decided the name, so I'm a little biased towards that. :-) I just think it's adorable!

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  • EEB88EEB88 member
    People are so rude! I loved the name Evelyn when I was pregnant with my son (obviously didn't name him Evelyn). But people (mainly my husbands family) had only negative things to say. (Which, considering her and her children's names, was totally the pot calling the kettle black.) that's why this time I'm not sharing a things. And sometimes I make up God awful names. Heck, if they're going to be negative I might as well have a chuckle about it.
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  • kidcapri100kidcapri100 member
    Opinions are like noses...everyone has one and some aren't as attractive as others ;)
    Stick to what you and your DH like. Ignore opinions from others. I always find that family is the worst! If you want to keep it a secret do so, if not just be prepared to ignore the flood of opinions.
    It's your child!
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  • rynneyrynney member
    If you all like the name, that's what matters. Not the opinions of others. But for real, why on earth would you keep sharing once you discovered that the haters are gonna hate? Sorry...T Swift is on pandora right now.
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  • kimb311kimb311 member
    I get it. People have started to ask us because they want to monogram things.( I guess it's a southern thing down here, we are carpet baggers but anyway.... )
    And I have learned to say-oh we are throwing around a few ideas. And leave it at that. We told both our parents that we really liked Grayson after finding out we were having a boy and both mothers gave us not so nice reviews of the name. :(
    We haven't shared with anyone else after that and are now back at square one trying to figure out a boy name
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  • weasleyB5weasleyB5 member
    That has to be REALLY annoying! This is why we decided to wait til we have the name down for sure to tell -- though I'm sure they will still annoy us about it! Btw I have two nephews named Ronan and Keiran - I think they are both great names. Go with your gut and if you like Ronan stick with it and don't worry - once they are born everyone will love it anyway!
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  • CmagnoCmagno member
    edited July 2015
    That is really frustrating. I agree with PP that usually when you tell people names "you are thinking about" they assume you are sharing because you want opinions. Sometimes you just want to share though, it's hard! I've learned if I love a name to preface with that, and I like sharing with my sis/mom and best friend but I basically tell them I'm not looking for opinions just sharing thoughts. I know they like being included so this seems to help.

    I love your names and we are considering Benjamin, I've always loved it! We also have an M last name and my Mom pointed out the BM problem but I think that's a silly reason to throw away a great name. We find out sex in 2 weeks and then we will get serious about finding a name. Good luck!
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  • GardenMama116GardenMama116 member
    My initials were BM before I was married. Never once in my life did anyone make a joke or comment about my initials...no exaggeration. Don't let that be a reason to skip Benjamin.
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  • amw2133amw2133 member
    We picked our names and we're done with it. Truth be told we picked them long before we conceived. :) those are the names we are going with and therefore no one has said anything. I've had a few weird looks but I ignore them. The one thing that I did find interesting was that my MIL asked why we weren't using hubby's grandmas name as a girls middle name, she passed away a month before I got pregnant (if baby is a girl we are going with my middle name Morgan which is a family name). Hubby and I had discussed but hubby's sister wants to use it and since she took care of grandma she gets first dibs in our opinion (SIL is going to start "trying" this summer I'm soooooo excited!!!). MIL looks at us and says but she's not pregnant so you guys should use it. She's usually not that opinionated so in all honesty it made me laugh. And the tell her no if SIL wants to use it that's her name regardless of if she's pregnant or not. Haha everyone has to have an opinion or two.
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  • groovylocksgroovylocks member
    Screw people. I like Ronan a lot. It's a fine name. You should go with that. 
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  • groovylocksgroovylocks member
    edited July 2015
    GardenMama116 said:
    My initials were BM before I was married. Never once in my life did anyone make a joke or comment about my initials...no exaggeration. Don't let that be a reason to skip Benjamin.
    Tee hee, your initials were BM!

    Sorry. I just... I ruin moments. 

    I'm very sorry.

    .....

    Benjamin is a great name. And Benji is actually a great nickname. And Ben is the typical nickname. Benj is also used these days with lots of success. And nobody will say a word about BM because they're not 4 like i obviously am ;)
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  • Laura&brad1Laura&brad1 member
    This is exactly why we have decided to keep bubs name a secret untill he or she is born! I don't want anyone else's opinion to put me off and once he or she is here no1 can change my mind! And by then i won't care what people think of the name we have chosen! I listen to people's names suggestions knowing that I've already picked names but I still say oh yes that's quite nice or whatever! Who cares what anyone else thinks it's your child and at the end of the day ur the only ones who need to like the name of your child! Goodluck
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  • mbecca11mbecca11 member
    I don't get how some people can be so mean to pregnant women. Like come on we're already moody and hormonal enough, don't make it worse by criticizing the names that we're interested in naming our children. And that's just it too... These babies are OUR children. Not anyone else's. The only other opinion besides ours that should matter when choosing names is our husbands/boyfriends/significant others/etc!

    I say name your baby boy whatever you want to name him and anyone that has anything negative or rude about it can @#$% off :) Haha.

    P.S. I love Ronan but I vote Benjamin just because that's my SO's name ;)
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  • sarahsnowballsarahsnowball member
    We're keeping the names secret too. We haven't decided but I really feel it should be our decision - we don't need any input from family or friends.
    OP, if you would like opinions on names check out the Baby Names board here on TB. The ladies there are very honest plus it's sometimes easier to hear the opinions of strangers.
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  • lmtablmtab member
    I love both of those names! That being said, it is nobody's business what you and your husband decide to name your child. If others don't like it, that's their own problem! Whatever name you guys decide on, your child will be loved and soon any feelings one way or the other will disappear. My sister has had 4 kids. Nobody liked any of the names her and her husband picked. She didn't give people a choice, just said this is the name. End of story, end of discussion. I highly recommend this approach. This is YOUR child, not theirs and as a parent, picking is your priviledge, right and perk! Good luck!
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  • mauraryan87mauraryan87 member
    We aren't sharing the names we picked out for that same reason. However I have been asking people what they think we should name the baby just so they feel like they have a say even though we're pretty set on the names we picked out.
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  • LMJLLMJL member
    Like a few other posters here, my brother refused to tell us the names before the kids were born. It drove me crazy then, but makes sense now! When asked why, he said "Because no one will like them, and we don't want to hear about it." So when my nephew Axel was born, we all chatted to ourselves, "Axel? Huh?! That's such a strange name!" But nobody made a peep to my brother or sister in law & we even curbed my sister's response (no filter due to a brain injury) beforehand. "Axel, that a dumb name! I'm not going to call him that. I'll just call him David" (his middle name.) Pretty soon, we couldn't imagine him being anyone else. It's the perfect name for him & his nickname is Axel-man, which makes him sound like a superhero. So, I'm all for not telling anyone. Although, they still won't tell us the girl name they had picked out even though my bro's had a vasectomy for years!

    We've told a few people our names (team green here) and while we haven't gotten flak because we are naming after people, (My dad & PopPop both had the same name & my husband's mom who passed away suddenly in 2014) I have seen a polite suppression of a face on a few & a wee bit of jealousy from my mom, whose ALWAYS wanted someone to name their baby after her, but 5 procreating children & not a one wants to do so, poor mom!  I do understand not want to use a popular name though (I love Benjamin, btw) which is why I'm not sharing my name choices here since I don't want anyone to steal them! They're both old names that aren't really popular, but old names are in right now, so they could pick up out of nowhere tomorrow. On that note though, my brother & sister in law both refused to pick any name that was on the top 100 list of most popular names. They named my niece Eleanor & then next thing they knew it became one of the most popular girls names the next year & there's tons of Ella's running around. So if you love a name, you should go for it! Good luck picking!
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  • hplunkett2883hplunkett2883 member
    My sister picked a very unusual name for her son and did not tell anyone including me until after his birth certificate papers were signed. She named him Tiger. Lots of people were in shock and voiced their nasty opinions anyway,  but his name suits him. He is 14 and is the only Tiger in his huge school and everyone thinks it's a cool name now. I agree with everyone else. If others opinions are going to sway you one way or another just keep it between you and your husband and forget everyone else. I actually plan on naming my son (if baby's a boy) Benjamin because that is my father's name. I don't care how popular it has become.
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  • MLC81614MLC81614 member
    I agree. It's so irritating. After getting the same reactions to names we like, my husband and I decided to keep the name to ourselves until baby is born. You have to love the name, no one else. Keep your head up and try to ignore all the negativity.
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  • vgrant0114vgrant0114 member
    Stop telling people! Once your baby is born and you announce, people won't be as rude
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  • momotheflyinglemurmomotheflyinglemur member
    We haven't found out whether it's a boy or a girl yet, but we are hoping for a boy. We are 50/50 torn between Benjamin and Oliver, but MiL and SisiL have decided to start refering to the baby as Oliver in every setting, even to other people!!! Everytime they say it I am less and less fond of the name. The intention was to have a few names chosen and then see the baby's face and know who he or she is going to be called. Not a moment before. It's not fair that the more emotionally attached they are to the name the less I am, simply because it is my SO top pick. I talked to him about it and he was just like "Okey.. I can't stop them." I said "No, I understand that they will be who they are, but you understand what I mean?" His response... "Yeah, I guess."

    I swear if MiL touches my stomach and says "Aww, little Olly" again I'm gonna verbally slap her for it! 
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  • havefaith262havefaith262 member
    We r going thru the same thing! After reading all of your posts, I'm going to not tell anyone any names until baby is born. People have def changed my mind about a name I love and it's not right.... So rude and inconsiderate! Good luck!
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