Circumcision or Not?

hornet7 · July 2015

Trying to make and educated decision. However, I wouldn't mind hearing what you guys are doing!

ash413 · July 2015

You might search this topic, there was a pretty heated discussion about it in the first tri.

I think the decision should be up to each couple, I don't judge anyone either way.
my H and I discussed it, but I gave him final say. We are choosing not to have our son circumcised. I feel it is an unnecessary medical procedure, if he were to want it done later I have no problem with supporting that decission.

MoRay05 · July 2015

I spoke to my OB about this and he recommended it. He said there is a greater chance of UTI and cancer. He said in other countries there are clinics where grown men line up to be circumcised daily bc of the chances of cancer. He also said the recovery is worse if done later in life. Is is also harder to keep clean when not circumcised.

I have also left the decision up to my DH. We are leaning towards circumcision for health reasons and so he won't look different from (most) other boys in the locker room or different from my DH.

Everyone has their own option about it. Like PP said there was a very heated discussion a while back that didn't end well. Be warned

EMLarie · July 2015

I've always thought circumcision was the only way-- even long, long before I was pregnant. Of course, now that I know I'm actually having a boy and thinks are real, I'm looking into both options.

BbyB3 · July 2015

We didn't find out our baby's gender but if it is to be a boy, we are definitely on board with getting him circumcised. I feel the health benefits are most important--plus when they are newborn, they won't remember a thing! It's been done so often that the risks really do not outweigh the benefits in my opinion.:) Good luck to you in your decision though!

Ceridwen77 · July 2015

We will not be getting our baby circumcised if it's a boy.

modanz1 · July 2015

I told my husband that I felt this was his decision to make. As a man, would he have wanted to go through life uncircumcised, was he ever upset with his parents for circumcising him, etc? I am not a man and have no idea what it's like to have a penis, so I felt it was up to him. For the record, he is 100% for circumcision and we will be getting it done to our boy.

oliarnmom1517 · July 2015

modanz1 said:
I told my husband that I felt this was his decision to make. As a man, would he have wanted to go through life uncircumcised, was he ever upset with his parents for circumcising him, etc? I am not a man and have no idea what it's like to have a penis, so I felt it was up to him. For the record, he is 100% for circumcision and we will be getting it done to our boy.

I have left it up to my husband as well.. He hasn't made a decision yet but I told him that it's 100% his decision to make because like PP said.. I don't have a penis .. At least last time I checked I didn't.. so I don't know what it will be like for our son..

TacoSarah · July 2015

It's not something that would've even crossed my mind had I not seen posts on it on here. It's not something that is common place in the UK, unless you're Jewish.

brossi359 · July 2015

I also left this up to my husband. He is the only one who can speak up for my little guy when it comes to this subject. We too went through all the options and as pp said we do not know what it is like to have a penis. We chose after weighing the pros and cons to have the procedure done

Crestonbaby · July 2015

MoRay05 said:
I spoke to my OB about this and he recommended it. He said there is a greater chance of UTI and cancer. He said in other countries there are clinics where grown men line up to be circumcised daily bc of the chances of cancer. He also said the recovery is worse if done later in life. Is is also harder to keep clean when not circumcised.

I have also left the decision up to my DH. We are leaning towards circumcision for health reasons and so he won't look different from (most) other boys in the locker room or different from my DH.

Everyone has their own option about it. Like PP said there was a very heated discussion a while back that didn't end well. Be warned

We aren't having a boy this time around, but with my first we didn't get it done. Now he's 10 and has never had a UTI since proper hIgine was taught.

Just wondering where your doc got his info in regards to the cancer correlation. There hasn't been any evidence to prove this in any studies or research done

lovey31 · July 2015

We'll be doing it if we have a boy. Did it with our first. I'd rather not have to deal with whatever "proper penis hygiene" means. And according to ACS circumcision done in infancy lowers risks of some cancers but NOT if done in adulthood. https://m.cancer.org/cancer/penilecancer/detailedguide/penile-cancer-risk-factors

jasbaby2 · July 2015

Crestonbaby said:

I spoke to my OB about this and he recommended it. He said there is a greater chance of UTI and cancer. He said in other countries there are clinics where grown men line up to be circumcised daily bc of the chances of cancer. He also said the recovery is worse if done later in life. Is is also harder to keep clean when not circumcised. I have also left the decision up to my DH. We are leaning towards circumcision for health reasons and so he won't look different from (most) other boys in the locker room or different from my DH. Everyone has their own option about it. Like PP said there was a very heated discussion a while back that didn't end well. Be warned
We aren't having a boy this time around, but with my first we didn't get it done. Now he's 10 and has never had a UTI since proper hIgine was taught. Just wondering where your doc got his info in regards to the cancer correlation. There hasn't been any evidence to prove this in any studies or research done

We didn't have it done the first time around either and our son is now six. we are also having a girl but if we were having another boy he would not be circumcised either.

I'm also surprised a medical professional would suggest there is a cancer correlation.

scw89 · July 2015

My baby is a boy and I will be circumsizing him. I believe it is up to you personally and I respect people who choose not to. It is their prerogative.

FilbertTree · July 2015

This is a conversation I need to have with DH too, but I personally don't think it's necessary. My understanding is that there are no discernible health benefits (this from conversations with a good friend who did a butt-load of research regarding this when her DS was born) and it's much more of an aesthetic choice. Kiddo1.0 is not circumcised and I'm inclined to make the same choice for the nugget. Kiddo1.0 is a stinky booger who would happily go for months without coming in contact with soap (he's 8...) and has never had any kind of UTI or anything else funky down there. Plus, knowing my child's penchant for nudity I'd rather both my boys looked the same so there's no freaking out over why one looks different to the other.

Crestonbaby · July 2015

lovey31 said:
We'll be doing it if we have a boy. Did it with our first. I'd rather not have to deal with whatever "proper penis hygiene" means. And according to ACS circumcision done in infancy lowers risks of some cancers but NOT if done in adulthood. https://m.cancer.org/cancer/penilecancer/detailedguide/penile-cancer-risk-factors

The site actually says: "The reason for the lower risk in circumcised men is not entirely clear, but it may be related to other known risk factors."

Meaning that it couple be related to something completely different as seen in many studies. There has not been any studies showing a causation effect, meaning there no cause and effect relationship between the two.

I only point this out because i encourage the OP and anyone trying to make this decision to read beyond websites and look at actual studies in order to make an informed decision. It's a very personal decision in the end.

My own personal opinion and experience after doing my own reading and learning about it is that it is not medically necessary and when it comes to any procedures that hurt my baby I'm a total wimp

Good luck on your research!

jscasher · July 2015

I told DH it was up to him, and he decided he'd like our son to be circumcised.

MoRay05 · July 2015

@Crestonbaby my OB has been involved many research studies and he is the doctor that invented the little cap they use to remove the skin during the procedure (not sure what the cap is called). There are many other factors to consider, we aren't only making our decision based on cancer and UTI concerns. Ultimately it is up to my husband and what he thinks is best. I can weigh in on the matter, but like PP have said I don't walk in their shoes. Good to know that your son hasn't had any issues! I feel guilty that our newborn will possibly have to undergo the procedure and maybe some pain and discomfort.

mollypuss1 · July 2015

I come from a culture where circumcision is definitely not the norm so I really struggle to understand why people in the US choose to do this to their children when there is no medical reason. I also don't understand why so many women leave the decision to their husbands, if I had a son and my husband wanted to cut a part of his body off I would definitely have an opinion, penis or no penis!

TessaNae · July 2015

I circumcised DS1 and will be doing the same for DS2. The pros outweigh the cons to us.

Crestonbaby · July 2015

MoRay05 said:
@Crestonbaby my OB has been involved many research studies and he is the doctor that invented the little cap they use to remove the skin during the procedure (not sure what the cap is called). There are many other factors to consider, we aren't only making our decision based on cancer and UTI concerns. Ultimately it is up to my husband and what he thinks is best. I can weigh in on the matter, but like PP have said I don't walk in their shoes. Good to know that your son hasn't had any issues! I feel guilty that our newborn will possibly have to undergo the procedure and maybe some pain and discomfort.

I would be interested in the studies that show the causation effect, like really interested not being a jerk about it interested

I work as a midwife and keep myself very informed when it comes to these things so when I hear new information I really want to read it and analyze their findings in order to provide the most up to date information. Like I mentioned before in my previous responses it's a very personal decision and it is completely up to the parents to do it or not, I would never try and persuade a parent in either direction as it's their choice, I would provide information however. Not sure if my previous response came across that way, but it was not intended that way. At the end I gave my own personal opinion since in the end I am a mother and do have one

BbyB3 · July 2015

I found this article and thought you all might be interested---presents the pros & cons so neutral article. Always good to be informed!

https://www.medicinenet.com/circumcision_the_medical_pros_and_cons/article.htm

ash413 · July 2015

Crestonbaby said:

MoRay05 said:
I spoke to my OB about this and he recommended it. He said there is a greater chance of UTI and cancer. He said in other countries there are clinics where grown men line up to be circumcised daily bc of the chances of cancer. He also said the recovery is worse if done later in life. Is is also harder to keep clean when not circumcised.

I have also left the decision up to my DH. We are leaning towards circumcision for health reasons and so he won't look different from (most) other boys in the locker room or different from my DH.

Everyone has their own option about it. Like PP said there was a very heated discussion a while back that didn't end well. Be warned

We aren't having a boy this time around, but with my first we didn't get it done. Now he's 10 and has never had a UTI since proper hIgine was taught.

Just wondering where your doc got his info in regards to the cancer correlation. There hasn't been any evidence to prove this in any studies or research done

Agreed, no study had ever proved causation. Many of the other "health benefits" are negligible.

helsbels222 · July 2015

I was always raised thinking it was necessary for cleanliness and to prevent UTIs. Then I read that it's all BS and simply started for religious reasons. I left it up to SO with my son so he had it done as an infant. If we have a boy we'll probably do the same. I think for us at this point it might be so he doesn't feel different or teased.

This decision is really up to each couple. I don't judge people for choosing not to. I just get annoyed when people try to force their opinion down my throat, like my mother who constantly criticizes me for having it done to my son. To each his own.

DrMommaDVM · July 2015

We had both of our boys circumcised and we're glad we did.

modanz1 · July 2015

mollypuss1 said:

I come from a culture where circumcision is definitely not the norm so I really struggle to understand why people in the US choose to do this to their children when there is no medical reason. I also don't understand why so many women leave the decision to their husbands, if I had a son and my husband wanted to cut a part of his body off I would definitely have an opinion, penis or no penis!

My thoughts on that are that my husband shouldn't get to choose what my daughter's vagina looks like because he doesn't know what it feels like to have a vagina or to be intimate with a man and be the one with the vagina. I left this decision up to him because I did not care either way and wanted a man's perspective on it. Because we do live in the U.S. and it is the norm here (I have never seen an uncircumcised penis in my life) I wanted his input. He very strongly felt that he was happy he was circumcised and would want the same for our son. Does a man in the US feel ashamed if he isn't circumcised when he's going to have sex? Does he wonder if he's normal? Does he wish he had been at birth so that he doesn't have to have memories of the procedure? Does he love it? I don't have any idea, because I don't have a penis. That's why I think a man's perspective is important.

RobinaCee · July 2015

I have three boys, 2 of which are grown men. I did NOT have them circumsized and they have never had any problems. It's really not hard to teach them to pull back their foreskin and clean the area. I did extensive research 22 years ago when my first son was born and discovered there is no medical reasons to have it done. It's just for aesthetic or religious reasons. And for those reasons I found it unnecessary to put my day old infant through such pain.

mollypuss1 · July 2015

modanz1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

I come from a culture where circumcision is definitely not the norm so I really struggle to understand why people in the US choose to do this to their children when there is no medical reason. I also don't understand why so many women leave the decision to their husbands, if I had a son and my husband wanted to cut a part of his body off I would definitely have an opinion, penis or no penis!

My thoughts on that are that my husband shouldn't get to choose what my daughter's vagina looks like because he doesn't know what it feels like to have a vagina or to be intimate with a man and be the one with the vagina. I left this decision up to him because I did not care either way and wanted a man's perspective on it. Because we do live in the U.S. and it is the norm here (I have never seen an uncircumcised penis in my life) I wanted his input. He very strongly felt that he was happy he was circumcised and would want the same for our son. Does a man in the US feel ashamed if he isn't circumcised when he's going to have sex? Does he wonder if he's normal? Does he wish he had been at birth so that he doesn't have to have memories of the procedure? Does he love it? I don't have any idea, because I don't have a penis. That's why I think a man's perspective is important.

I fail to understand how you or your husband would have any input on choosing how your daughter's vagina looks? The only way either he or you could have an input is via FGM and I doubt you would be advocating this so its kind of a mute point in this circumstance as I'm sure you are not saying that if you were an advocate of FGM your husband's attitude would be that it's your choice with it because your the one with the vagina?

Your husband's opinion is based on his own experiences of being circumcised and as such is a biased view. He cannot tell you what it feels like to be an uncircumcised man any more than you can.

As I said I really don't understand the U.S. obsession with cutting off a part of their children's body for aesthetic purposes or simply because it's the done thing.

modanz1 · July 2015

mollypuss1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

I come from a culture where circumcision is definitely not the norm so I really struggle to understand why people in the US choose to do this to their children when there is no medical reason. I also don't understand why so many women leave the decision to their husbands, if I had a son and my husband wanted to cut a part of his body off I would definitely have an opinion, penis or no penis!

My thoughts on that are that my husband shouldn't get to choose what my daughter's vagina looks like because he doesn't know what it feels like to have a vagina or to be intimate with a man and be the one with the vagina. I left this decision up to him because I did not care either way and wanted a man's perspective on it. Because we do live in the U.S. and it is the norm here (I have never seen an uncircumcised penis in my life) I wanted his input. He very strongly felt that he was happy he was circumcised and would want the same for our son. Does a man in the US feel ashamed if he isn't circumcised when he's going to have sex? Does he wonder if he's normal? Does he wish he had been at birth so that he doesn't have to have memories of the procedure? Does he love it? I don't have any idea, because I don't have a penis. That's why I think a man's perspective is important.
I fail to understand how you or your husband would have any input on choosing how your daughter's vagina looks? The only way either he or you could have an input is via FGM and I doubt you would be advocating this so its kind of a mute point in this circumstance as I'm sure you are not saying that if you were an advocate of FGM your husband's attitude would be that it's your choice with it because your the one with the vagina? Your husband's opinion is based on his own experiences of being circumcised and as such is a biased view. He cannot tell you what it feels like to be an uncircumcised man any more than you can. As I said I really don't understand the U.S. obsession with cutting off a part of their children's body for aesthetic purposes or simply because it's the done thing.

Well I don't understand a lot of other culture's obsession with things, that doesn't make them wrong. If you can't understand how my husband has more experience with having a penis than I do, then I guess we just have to agree to disagree.

lulamagoo · July 2015

We had our son circumcised and if this child is a boy, he will be circumcised as well.
I grew up in the Midwest where it is the norm, when I worked in an infant room in California, about half of the boys were circumcised. So, depending on what part of the U.S. You live in, it may or may not be the norm.

mollypuss1 · July 2015

modanz1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

modanz1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

I come from a culture where circumcision is definitely not the norm so I really struggle to understand why people in the US choose to do this to their children when there is no medical reason. I also don't understand why so many women leave the decision to their husbands, if I had a son and my husband wanted to cut a part of his body off I would definitely have an opinion, penis or no penis!

My thoughts on that are that my husband shouldn't get to choose what my daughter's vagina looks like because he doesn't know what it feels like to have a vagina or to be intimate with a man and be the one with the vagina. I left this decision up to him because I did not care either way and wanted a man's perspective on it. Because we do live in the U.S. and it is the norm here (I have never seen an uncircumcised penis in my life) I wanted his input. He very strongly felt that he was happy he was circumcised and would want the same for our son. Does a man in the US feel ashamed if he isn't circumcised when he's going to have sex? Does he wonder if he's normal? Does he wish he had been at birth so that he doesn't have to have memories of the procedure? Does he love it? I don't have any idea, because I don't have a penis. That's why I think a man's perspective is important.
I fail to understand how you or your husband would have any input on choosing how your daughter's vagina looks? The only way either he or you could have an input is via FGM and I doubt you would be advocating this so its kind of a mute point in this circumstance as I'm sure you are not saying that if you were an advocate of FGM your husband's attitude would be that it's your choice with it because your the one with the vagina?

Your husband's opinion is based on his own experiences of being circumcised and as such is a biased view. He cannot tell you what it feels like to be an uncircumcised man any more than you can.

As I said I really don't understand the U.S. obsession with cutting off a part of their children's body for aesthetic purposes or simply because it's the done thing.

Well I don't understand a lot of other culture's obsession with things, that doesn't make them wrong. If you can't understand how my husband has more experience with having a penis than I do, then I guess we just have to agree to disagree.

It doesn't make them right either

I fully understand that your husband has more 'experience with a penis' but like I said his views are biased as he only has experience with a circumcised penis and as such having a penis gives him no more experience to make a judgement than you or I

modanz1 · July 2015

mollypuss1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

I come from a culture where circumcision is definitely not the norm so I really struggle to understand why people in the US choose to do this to their children when there is no medical reason. I also don't understand why so many women leave the decision to their husbands, if I had a son and my husband wanted to cut a part of his body off I would definitely have an opinion, penis or no penis!

My thoughts on that are that my husband shouldn't get to choose what my daughter's vagina looks like because he doesn't know what it feels like to have a vagina or to be intimate with a man and be the one with the vagina. I left this decision up to him because I did not care either way and wanted a man's perspective on it. Because we do live in the U.S. and it is the norm here (I have never seen an uncircumcised penis in my life) I wanted his input. He very strongly felt that he was happy he was circumcised and would want the same for our son. Does a man in the US feel ashamed if he isn't circumcised when he's going to have sex? Does he wonder if he's normal? Does he wish he had been at birth so that he doesn't have to have memories of the procedure? Does he love it? I don't have any idea, because I don't have a penis. That's why I think a man's perspective is important.
I fail to understand how you or your husband would have any input on choosing how your daughter's vagina looks? The only way either he or you could have an input is via FGM and I doubt you would be advocating this so its kind of a mute point in this circumstance as I'm sure you are not saying that if you were an advocate of FGM your husband's attitude would be that it's your choice with it because your the one with the vagina? Your husband's opinion is based on his own experiences of being circumcised and as such is a biased view. He cannot tell you what it feels like to be an uncircumcised man any more than you can. As I said I really don't understand the U.S. obsession with cutting off a part of their children's body for aesthetic purposes or simply because it's the done thing.

Well I don't understand a lot of other culture's obsession with things, that doesn't make them wrong. If you can't understand how my husband has more experience with having a penis than I do, then I guess we just have to agree to disagree.
It doesn't make them right either I fully understand that your husband has more 'experience with a penis' but like I said his views are biased as he only has experience with a circumcised penis and as such having a penis gives him no more experience to make a judgement than you or I

You're right. It doesn't make them right, so I guess that means your views aren't necessarily right. We are just going to go ahead and do what we feel is right for our child in the society that he lives in. You do the same for yours.

vomitrosa · July 2015

Snip, snippy...our boy will be circumcised. I actually had asked 3 different men I had dated (when we were together of course) how they felt being uncircumcised. All of them said they wished their parents had it done when they were babies. One guy I knew had it done as an adult and said it was extremely painful. It's all personal preference but I took advice from others on that one.

mollypuss1 · July 2015

modanz1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

modanz1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

modanz1 said:

mollypuss1 said:

I come from a culture where circumcision is definitely not the norm so I really struggle to understand why people in the US choose to do this to their children when there is no medical reason. I also don't understand why so many women leave the decision to their husbands, if I had a son and my husband wanted to cut a part of his body off I would definitely have an opinion, penis or no penis!

My thoughts on that are that my husband shouldn't get to choose what my daughter's vagina looks like because he doesn't know what it feels like to have a vagina or to be intimate with a man and be the one with the vagina. I left this decision up to him because I did not care either way and wanted a man's perspective on it. Because we do live in the U.S. and it is the norm here (I have never seen an uncircumcised penis in my life) I wanted his input. He very strongly felt that he was happy he was circumcised and would want the same for our son. Does a man in the US feel ashamed if he isn't circumcised when he's going to have sex? Does he wonder if he's normal? Does he wish he had been at birth so that he doesn't have to have memories of the procedure? Does he love it? I don't have any idea, because I don't have a penis. That's why I think a man's perspective is important.
I fail to understand how you or your husband would have any input on choosing how your daughter's vagina looks? The only way either he or you could have an input is via FGM and I doubt you would be advocating this so its kind of a mute point in this circumstance as I'm sure you are not saying that if you were an advocate of FGM your husband's attitude would be that it's your choice with it because your the one with the vagina?

Your husband's opinion is based on his own experiences of being circumcised and as such is a biased view. He cannot tell you what it feels like to be an uncircumcised man any more than you can.

As I said I really don't understand the U.S. obsession with cutting off a part of their children's body for aesthetic purposes or simply because it's the done thing.

Well I don't understand a lot of other culture's obsession with things, that doesn't make them wrong. If you can't understand how my husband has more experience with having a penis than I do, then I guess we just have to agree to disagree.

It doesn't make them right either

I fully understand that your husband has more 'experience with a penis' but like I said his views are biased as he only has experience with a circumcised penis and as such having a penis gives him no more experience to make a judgement than you or I

You're right. It doesn't make them right, so I guess that means your views aren't necessarily right. We are just going to go ahead and do what we feel is right for our child in the society that he lives in. You do the same for yours.

I didn't say my views were any more right than yours, I simply said they were my views. I'm fully aware that my views won't make one iota of difference to you or anyone else wishing to get this 'procedure' done to their baby.

lulamagoo · July 2015

vomitrosa said:
Snip, snippy...our boy will be circumcised. I actually had asked 3 different men I had dated (when we were together of course) how they felt being uncircumcised. All of them said they wished their parents had it done when they were babies. One guy I knew had it done as an adult and said it was extremely painful. It's all personal preference but I took advice from others on that one.

I also had a friend get circumcised later in life, I think we were 14. He said it was awful and wished it had been done as an infant.

vomitrosa · July 2015

@lulamagoo That's exactly what this guy said, he was a teenager and said he was out of school for almost 6 weeks and it was really hard on him! I'm glad I don't have a weiner hahaha

skabanak · July 2015

ash413 said:
You might search this topic, there was a pretty heated discussion about it in the first tri.

I think the decision should be up to each couple, I don't judge anyone either way.
my H and I discussed it, but I gave him final say. We are choosing not to have our son circumcised. I feel it is an unnecessary medical procedure, if he were to want it done later I have no problem with supporting that decission.

Lol I just searched and read the previous post about this!!! Wowza!!!

katiedhunter · July 2015

Both my boys are snipped! And this one will be too. I had left the original decision up to my hubby. That's his area not mine! Lol

lyankowi · July 2015

One of my nephews is circumcised the other is not, I feel bad that the uncircumcised one looks different than his dad and brother. I worked at a Urology office and if it does need done later in life it is pretty bad. I will be because dad is so I feel like his pebis should look like his dad's too, and the Urology office reason too. I also have a friend who has all of his boys cut because he wishes he would have been.

arichmon1 · July 2015

I don't think it should be just left up to the husband. Just because you have a certain set of genitalia, doesn't mean you're the expert of that decision. The decision should be made by both of you after a good bit of a research. Most insurance companies don't even cover it anymore because it's considered an unnecessary medical procedure. Also, as a nurse, I've seen circumcisions done, and I can't say I would subject my son to that. They cut a piece of your God given body away without anesthesia. However, people have their reasons. If you do your research, you will actually find that the instance of UTI in uncircumcised men is actually not that much greater than those of circumcised men. You need to teach your son "proper penis hygiene" regardless if circumcised or not, so teaching him how to properly clean himself shouldn't be an issue. It's a really important decision, do all the research you can from unbiased medical journals. That is your best source of information because no one will try and sway you one way or another. That way you can make the decision that is best for you and your family.

hmf0245 · July 2015

Neither of my brothers were circumsized at birth...my mother was adamant about them making that decision for themselves. I remember when I was 9 and my older brother had a bad infection because the skin wasn't growing properly with the rest of his body. Both of my brothers were circumsized because of it and I just remember them both being in a lot of pain( they were teenagers).
I'm totally for getting my kiddo circumsized at birth simply because of remembering this experience but to each their own

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