Off topic: cat scratch

JStill0603 · June 2015

My 5 year old stepson visits his mom every Monday and Tuesday. This week had came back with multiple cat scratches all over his face, over his eye/ eye brow, his ear and his cheek and some additional, not as severe ones on his leg. I did not grow up with any animals in the house so I don't really know what is considered "normal" to a pet owner, but the more I think about this, the more it is upsetting me.

The scratches seem to be healing okay, but I want to know if his mom is aware such scratches could cause cat scratch disease and if she took him to be evaluated by a doctor, or even considered it. I also want to know if she would consider getting rid of the cat or keeping it "put away" while he is over. My husband and I also largely suspect that stepson is allergic to it, for multiple reasons. But I don't think these questions would be well received and I know for sure they would cause a huge argument between DH and stepsons mom.

My question is, am I overreacting?

Ceridwen77 · June 2015

I grew up with cats and have had my fair share of scratches (actually still have 2 cats and still get scratched on the rare occasion).

Have you talked to your stepson or the family about what happened leading up to the scratches? Cats typically don't just go around scratching people for no reason. He may have been holding the cat and something scared it (this is how I got recent scratches). The cats response in these situations is putting out its claws and trying to run/get somewhere safe. Or he was provoking the cat.

As long as the scratches are properly cleaned, getting cat scratch disease is extremely unlikely. You can buy some saline wound wash or something and send it with him and ask his mom to use that if he gets scratched, along with some neosporin.

I think it's way beyond your place to ask them to get rid of their pet.

TacoSarah · June 2015

I think you may be overreacting a little to the scratches, but I get it, you love this little boy and want to protect him.

I am a cat person and even worked in a cat boarding kennel as a teenaged and got scratched so many time, I've never once gotten sick or needed to visit the doctor because of a cat scratch. A cat bite if a bit different. Is the cat indoor or outdoor? That makes a bit of a difference in him getting any diseases. Hopefully the cat is vaccinated and so is your step son.

Do you know how he got the scratches and has it happened before? Maybe he was playing with the cat or antagonised it and it lashed out or it might just be a playful kitty that got carried away. If he's not around animals very often he's probably not aware of how to interact with a cat. Maybe this is something you could explore with him?

If you think he's allergic to cats you should really get this confirmed by a doctor, then if you want to talk to her about getting rid of the cat or keeping it away whilst he visits, you have a legitimate reason.

JStill0603 · June 2015

We did talk to him about it and I'm sure it wasn't just that the cat walked over and scratched him, I'm sure there was more involved that that. It was just the amount of scratches that concerned me more. It clearly got him at least one good swipe down and one good swipe across the face/ear, and I'm assuming the ones on his leg may have been from the back legs of the cat trying to get away.

It's hard for me to teach him how to treat cats because both me and his dad are very allergic and have never been around them. His dad had dogs.

I guess it may not bother me as much if there wasn't a giant scratch across his eye that had clearly been bleeding. I think that's really scary.

He hasn't been able to tell us much except his mom "spanked" the cat and it ran away.

I don't know if the cat is indoor or outdoor, we don't have a ton of communication...

Ceridwen77 · June 2015

If the scratches are healing well it's highly likely the mother cleaned them. It also is relevant that the boy said the mom spanked the cat - that means she was present and able to jump in when necessary. Cats can go from sweet to crazy in a split second if provoked.

You definitely need to work with the son on handling animals. You could go to a pet store or shelter and have him interact with a small animal you aren't allergic to. It can be tied back to how he should treat the cat.

Also can your husband call and ask his ex how she treats the scratches and what you can do to help prevent this in the future?

thegingeravenger · June 2015

I had cat scratch fever as a kid. Just make a mental note of the scratches and if he begins presenting symptoms just mention the cat scratches to the doctor. I will say that him having scratches on his face is strange, but it probably means he was was either ignoring the cat's way of saying "go away human" or was playing with the cat and got too rough/something spooked the cat.

If you suspect allergies, seek out testing by a doctor. If you and your husband do talk to his mom, please drop the "did you know that he could get cat scratch fever" from the talk. If she's a responsible cat owner, she knows.

parisiennemom · June 2015

I am someone who had gotten catch scratch fever as a child and trust me you will know if your son has it.

Just keep an eye on him- and don't worry unless you have to

modanz1 · June 2015

I was scratched by a stray kitten several years ago on my hand. The scratches didn't present much of a problem but a flat red rash started moving up my arm. I went to the doctor and he wasn't too concerned, just had me keep an eye on it. It went away within a week and never itched or anything. He said it could be cat scratch fever. I think you normally get that from strays and it is very rare. I am glad to hear the scratches are healing well though, that's the most important part. The scratch by the eye would concern me as well, just because it's scary to think what might have happened if it had gotten his eye. I don't think there's anything wrong with asking what she put on the scratches. If nothing else, act like you want to continue the same treatment because it's working. That would at least be an opening into the conversation about what happened.

VexyMommy · June 2015

My daughter is a huge animal lover. When she was younger she had a tendency to pick up our cats, put them next to her face and nuzzle them. She was scratched a few times on her face before my explanation of why we don't do that really sunk in. She also attempted to give our cat a shower with her one evening. She got quite a few scratches from that. At some point, children will learn by making mistakes and sometimes those involve a small amount of pain. If they do not involve permanent scarring or hospitalization then it sounds like a typical part of childhood. It's possible your stepson (like my daughter) ignored his mother's repeated warnings about the cat and suffered the inevitable consequences. He will probably be more cautious next time which is a good thing.

DrMommaDVM · June 2015

Cat scratches can actually be a big deal for disease transmission, especially if the cat has or has had fleas. "Cat scratch fever" is a real thing. It's called Bartonellosis and it's an insidious infection that can in some cases lead to chronic health issues.

I try my damnedest to avoid cat scratches and I sure as heck wouldn't want my kids being scratched up.

Also I agree that if the kid has scratches all over him, there are some inappropriate interactions happening there. Sounds like they need to be separated for everyone's benefit.

MargaretC5 · June 2015

To have that many scratches I would assuming your SS was doing something to the cat it did not like. If your SS is not around cats that often he probably had no idea he was upsetting the cat. I would talk to him about leaving the cat alone as a first step. If it happens again I would talk his mother about what happened, to better understand the situation than figure out the next steps.
I volunteer at an animal shelter and the only time I got scratched on my face and back is when I was trying to give a cat medicine on a high counter, it got pissed swatted at my face then went over my shoulder and down my back to get away. Trust me I was pissing the cat off, most cats hate pills.

JStill0603 · June 2015

Thanks for all the advice. I'm 100% sure it wasn't totally unprovoked. The cat has lived there since his mother moved there about a year ago, and this is the first time it has been this bad. I'm more worried about when to say something to her and what to say because I'm more worried about the placement of the scratches and the type of supervision that was or was not happening while he was with the cat.

I think for this time, we are just going to talk to stepson about how to treat animals and hope it doesn't happen again.

ooooner · June 2015

I grew up in a house with both dogs and cats. I think you are overreacting based on what you posted originally alone. Do you know the circumstances around why the cat scratched? If it scratched because it was scared or somehow being harassed, you cannot blame the cat. Hold old is your stepson? I ask because young kids can have a tendency to be mean to animals without realizing it, such as pulling their tail or picking them up in inappropriate ways. All I'm saying is you may not know the full story here; you cannot blame an animal for justly defending itself.

Having said that, I am NOT a cat person. Cats are evil IMO, so I would not put it past the cat just to scratch and bite for no reason, and perhaps there is cause for concern. I still live with two cats even now because my boyfriend who is the father of my unborn child and future husband to me has two cats whom he got stuck with from his previous marriage. His ex-wife thought it was cute to bring home some kittens, but in the end she has no respect for animals whatsoever and refused to continue to take care of the cats once they were grown. What kind of person just throws a cat out on its own in a random neighborhood? His ex-wife does. She literally did that to one of them, they had three. My boyfriend kept the other two and I respect him for it. You don't get a pet unless you are committed to it for the long haul, meaning the pet's entire life. I dislike cats very much but I will not force my boyfriend to get rid of them based on the fact that they are family. They are just as much his family and therefore my family as this baby will be our family IMO.

Now that I wrote the above I see your comment saying you aren't sure about whether the cat was provoked. I think discussing the situation with your stepson first is a good idea, like you said, before even bringing his mother into it. Best of luck to you!

peachesnpearls · June 2015

Kittens are the main culprit of transmission. Just FYI.

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