It's a very personal decision but sorry, we can't compare female circumcision (mutilation, really) to a male circumcision.
Why not? In both cases you are removing a piece of the child's genitals, that serves a purpose, for a cosmetic reason. Please share your thoughts on why they are different...
Do some research on stds,uti,hiv risks, benefits for women who they engage in sexual acts with, and how it can reduce a woman's risk of cervical cancer. It's been said many times that the benefits of circumcision outweigh the risk. It's not just about cleanliness in the bathroom that's important.
It's a very personal decision but sorry, we can't compare female circumcision (mutilation, really) to a male circumcision.
Why not? In both cases you are removing a piece of the child's genitals, that serves a purpose, for a cosmetic reason. Please share your thoughts on why they are different...
well, the reasons for female mutilation are not for cosmetic reasons. It's to remove the clitoris or even further the labia as well, then she is sewn shut so only urine and menstrual blood can come out. It's to preserve her virginity until her wedding night and remove sexual satisfaction. So not at all the same as a male circumcision.
Do some research on stds,uti,hiv risks, benefits for women who they engage in sexual acts with, and how it can reduce a woman's risk of cervical cancer. It's been said many times that the benefits of circumcision outweigh the risk. It's not just about cleanliness in the bathroom that's important.
If the benefit outweighs the risk why is there not a single medical health organization with a stance that supports routine circumcision?
Last I heard, again HEARD, so don't take it for a fact is that the cdc was showing more support with circumcision but obviously it's a parental decision. i would google that but I can't right now
It's a very personal decision but sorry, we can't compare female circumcision (mutilation, really) to a male circumcision.
Why not? In both cases you are removing a piece of the child's genitals, that serves a purpose, for a cosmetic reason. Please share your thoughts on why they are different...
well, the reasons for female mutilation are not for cosmetic reasons. It's to remove the clitoris or even further the labia as well, then she is sewn shut so only urine and menstrual blood can come out. It's to preserve her virginity until her wedding night and remove sexual satisfaction. So not at all the same as a male circumcision.
I've read a story about this in my 9th grade civics class. A woman spoke out and was interviewed saying that the night of her 13th birthday while she was sleeping she was tied to her bed and gagged while it was performed. She is from Africa, not sure of the part but this practice was just banned somewhere in Africa a few days ago which is great to hear.
It's a very personal decision but sorry, we can't compare female circumcision (mutilation, really) to a male circumcision.
Why not? In both cases you are removing a piece of the child's genitals, that serves a purpose, for a cosmetic reason. Please share your thoughts on why they are different...
well, the reasons for female mutilation are not for cosmetic reasons. It's to remove the clitoris or even further the labia as well, then she is sewn shut so only urine and menstrual blood can come out. It's to preserve her virginity until her wedding night and remove sexual satisfaction. So not at all the same as a male circumcision.
You contradicted yourself with this statement. Removing sexual satisfaction.... What do you think you are doing to a little boy when your remove a piece of skin of his sex organ that contains thousands of nerve endings?
I in no way support circumcision for boys or girls but for the sake of the argument: they are circumcising little girls for a purpose, to maintain Virginity... What's the purpose for a little boy? Because we don't like the way it looks?
Do some research on stds,uti,hiv risks, benefits for women who they engage in sexual acts with, and how it can reduce a woman's risk of cervical cancer. It's been said many times that the benefits of circumcision outweigh the risk. It's not just about cleanliness in the bathroom that's important.
If the benefit outweighs the risk why is there not a single medical health organization with a stance that supports routine circumcision?
The cdc actually started supporting it in 2014. Not only are they supporting it for males who aren't circumcised, they support that it's a personal decision for the parents to make.
Check out this graph. Pretty interesting and might explain some of our conflicting ideas. I'm from the Midwest. Look how high our stats are for circumcision.
Like I've stated, I stand very firm on decision as a mother, and have researched about my decision. No single person in this thread has to like it or agree with it.
I let MH make the call. Not the greatest reason, but we went with it. DS slept through it and was kind of fussy the rest of the day, but he did well. His Plastibell took the full 10 days to come off so the aftercare was a bit of a pain but nothing major.
It removes sexual satisfaction so she is not tempted to have sex before her wedding night and because women aren't supposed to feel sexual pleasure. I fail to see how that is a contradiction. Removing her clitoris reduces her sexual satisfaction much much more than removing foreskin. Again, the intent and how it is performed does not even compare to a male circ. You don't have to agree with it, at all but it's not fair to compare them.
You dont do anything with an intact penis. Its actually harder to deal with a circumcised penis.
The foreskin is fused to the head of the penis and you just clean it like you would a finger.
This is true. I still stand by our decision, but you actually have to do retraction and cleaning WITH circumcision. We had to put a special ointment on it the last month because it looked like adhesions might be starting, so we're more vigilant about retracting now.
My first son was circumcised. He was "fine" at first. But then at about 5 months his issues started. He has a skin bridge caused by the surgery. It caused painful erections. I looked it up and found that its pretty common with circomcised men. Its usually uncomment with children because their penises are so small. Meaning my son has an extreme casebut every case is significant. I realised how uninformed i was when i chose to do this to my son.
I took his rights away from him. He is nissing 20000 nerve endings and a very important part of his body because i thought he should look like his dad. (What man and son compare penises anyway?)
My second son was born whole and perfect and i kept him that way.
Check out this graph. Pretty interesting and might explain some of our conflicting ideas. I'm from the Midwest. Look how high our stats are for circumcision.
The difference between regions is crazy! Thanks for posting this!
I've already stated my opinion, but just an FYI for all of you, as a medical professional--webmd, Google, and the like are not acceptable forms of 'proof' or 'facts'. Providers have been sued and lost their licenses for using those as their 'resources' and 'references' for medical decision making. I'm not saying it's not a good baseline to start from for lay people, but sources such as the CDC and UpToDate are actually considered academic and up to standard. I say all this to remind people to be aware of where they are getting their information for the source is just as important if not more than the actual information.
All that being said, UpToDate had much to say about the benefits of the procedure and that many of the risks dealt with the actual procedure and not necessarily a physical/mental/emotional defect following it.
Once again, I stand by the thought that it is a personal decision....just make sure you are truly making an educated decision when/if you do.
I've already stated my opinion, but just an FYI for all of you, as a medical professional--webmd, Google, and the like are not acceptable forms of 'proof' or 'facts'. Providers have been sued and lost their licenses for using those as their 'resources' and 'references' for medical decision making. I'm not saying it's not a good baseline to start from for lay people, but sources such as the CDC and UpToDate are actually considered academic and up to standard. I say all this to remind people to be aware of where they are getting their information for the source is just as important if not more than the actual information.
All that being said, UpToDate had much to say about the benefits of the procedure and that many of the risks dealt with the actual procedure and not necessarily a physical/mental/emotional defect following it.
Once again, I stand by the thought that it is a personal decision....just make sure you are truly making an educated decision when/if you do.
Exactly why I posted a link from webmd having the CDCs site directly to their new mission and resources linked to it. Not Wikipedia.
@laceyglowacki I'm in agreement with you and I saw you did. I wasn't referring to you...it was more meant for a point of information. I said the CDC is reputable.
@laceyglowacki I'm in agreement with you and I saw you did. I wasn't referring to you...it was more meant for a point of information. I said the CDC is reputable.
I know, I was just waiting for someone to say the link I posted wasn't reputable because it's on web me. I've had to use so many peer reviewed and scholarly articles in nursing school that it's beat into my head on what not to trust !
DS is and if this one is a boy he will be as well. DH isn't and he hates it, it's painful during sex at times. He looked into getting it done but he's heard horror stories of adults being circ'ed and he doesn't want to be one of them. He has said several times that he wishes it would have been done when he was born so I support his wishes. I don't have a penis so.....
Married 07/29/10 and blessed with our Baby Boy Bowen on 06/17/2013
Oh ok. ☺️ Gotcha....well then you know exactly what I'm talking about! If you go back to grad school it will be beat in there even more....it's amazing that some people/providers still try to use it as their resource/reference in their diagnosis/treatment plans. If I recall correctly, CDC did not take a stance on it until 2014 like you mentioned. Maybe that means the evidence is becoming stronger in favor of it? Longitudinal studies take years, so I'm sure that's why there hasn't been much from them or other big organizations like them until more recently. <---I will likely get flamed for this statement...
Ladies, ask the men in your lives. They do notice each other's penises. They don't necessarily stand around doing side-by-side comparisons, but in a locker room, they will notice other people, especially if they are particularly large or small. I will say that not all the men I've asked have noticed circumcision status, but some have. And between potty training and changing clothes and showering, boys are pretty likely to see their father's penis at some point. How a father addresses if there is a difference is another issue.
This is for women considering circumcision, I am not trying to change anyone's mind just give them my experience with uncircumcised penises for those who are worried about their child's future sex life if the decide not to circumcised. I've been in relationships with more uncircumcised men than circumcised, and I've never heard of them having any problems with it. Nor was there ever painful sex for them during the relationship, most of which lasted at least a year. Maybe it's possible for it to be painful but I don't think that's normal. Just my opinion but being uncircumcised definitely does not guarantee painful sex or ridicule from either girls or guys. Obviously I had to learn about the difference but I found it didn't matter to me. I also think teaching kids about safe sex and having them get tested if they are sexually active will go far in preventing STIs. Honestly I feel like if as a parent you are willing and able to teach your child how to clean themselves and practice safe sex when the time comes, circumcision won't be a problem. But again I am not a doctor so for the medical bit definitely talk to your doctor about the benefits of either way.
Check out this graph. Pretty interesting and might explain some of our conflicting ideas. I'm from the Midwest. Look how high our stats are for circumcision.
Check out this graph. Pretty interesting and might explain some of our conflicting ideas. I'm from the Midwest. Look how high our stats are for circumcision.
I removed the graph from your quote because it's so big, but it's nearly ten years old and the CDC rates are much lower now nationwide.
My point was that norms are obviously dependent on location. I thought it was interesting to see the difference between regions. I wasn't using it to influence anyone. Isn't it obvious that everyone on this thread has made up her mind? It's like beating a dead horse.
I'm a lurker from the January 2016 moms board, but gave birth to my last son 4 weeks early, so I could be joining you if this pregnancy goes down the same path. I think you'll get different opinions on this based in what country or section of the U.S. People live in. In my area not circumcising is becoming increasingly popular. I decided not to circumcise my son after doing a lot of research. I hadn't even thought about it until a friend told me one of her sons had a circumcision gone wrong. In the end, I decided not to put my newborn son through an elective procedure. I don't judge anyone who chooses to circumcise, but I feel that if we teach him how to keep it clean, being uncircumcised shouldn't affect his health. In terms of acceptance with future intimate partners, I think it will be much less taboo by then because many more people are choosing not to circumcise. I've also read that having the foreskin intact can increase sensation for both parties. Good luck on your decision. And remember, it is yours and the baby's father's decision alone.
We actually just discussed this is school. The risk vs benefit ratio is actually pretty even so there isn't any real reason for parents to do it other than they want to. The official standpoint is that it is a parental choice. The most common reason for circumcision now is based on what dad has had done as a lot of parents want their kids to look like them.
This is not related. But when my son was born his balls were really swollen, I was told its common. Anyway the dr was like don't worry about the swelling in his testicles it will go away and it don't affect his ability to have children.... Ya know cause I was thinking about my 3hr old baby having children!!
We had our son circumscized. The recovery was fine, they didn't take enough off, so he still looked pretty uncircumcised. The docs said in puberty he would grow into it. We were diligent at cleaning him. At 12 months he got an infection. We decided to get him re circumscized at 15 months. It was really easy and my son was back to normal within 12 hours. After going through 2 circumscisions and the 1 infection, the infection was far worse. Good luck with your decision.
I have 2 boys. Both are not circumcised. My oldest is 19 and youngest is 1. Thier dads are circumcised and the only argument either made about it at the time was that they would be mad if we didn't do it while they were babies. With some education about the procedure and valid evidence about circumcision both agreed to not circumcise. I am very happy with this choice and feel strongly that I am only a caretaker of these children bodies. If either ever wanted to get circumcised I'd totally be supportive but I wanted them to be able to make that decision not me or their dad. Especially since it's something that can't be changed once done.
It was important to my husband to circumcise and after listening to him and doing my own reading I agreed. He is circumcised and had an unrelated issue come up as a child that required surgery. If he had been uncircumcised they would have strongly recommended it then and the recovery would have been much more difficult and with a higher chance of infection. That does not mean our son will have the same issue but that's not to say it won't either.
The medical community will never take a side until the benefits obviously lean more toward one or the other. Until then it will remain the parents' choice. As long as you do so informed and commit to the care involved with either choice, I don't see an issue.
Oh...I feel for anyone struggling with this decision. It was THE only thing I was dreading as I looked forward to the birth of our first child- a boy. We didn't know the gender until baby arrived so we didn't seriously think about it until we knew we needed to. And, I AGONIZED over it. Maybe it was the hormones, but I cried many, many tears over the thought of my son going through it and the thought of making the wrong decision for him in general. I consulted my pediatrician, and several friends with boys. All conceded that it was a personal decision, as the benefits and the risks kind of "balanced." Furthermore, we were told by several medical staff members - pediatrician, my dr, etc- that while the majority of boys in our area (rural community and nearby towns of around 30-40K) WERE circumsized, the rate was dropping and in the metro areas it was about 50/50- and dropping. We live in MN. At the end of the day, my husband (who IS circumsized) and I found ourselves either A) finding the reasons TO circumsize "far-fetched" (i.e. reducing the risk of AIDS transmission later in life) or simply not legitimate enough to warrant the procedure (needing to look like daddy- my husband thought that was just a matter of simple explanation, like anything else.) PS -....daddy's penis is going to look very different than his in several other ways as well ). Or, being unclean. There are many parts of the body that one needs to know how to properly clean. Why is the uncircumcised penis any different? The only thing I was hung up on is my little boy getting made fun of as an adolescent. My husband- who played high school and college sports- reassured me that NO guy EVER commented on another guy's penis- either publicly or privately. And we are not Jewish, so it is not necessary for religious reasons. At the end of the day, we made the decision NOT to circumsize on the way to little man's first appointment post birth, where the procedure would have to be done if we decided to do it. Im so happy we decided the way we did, and am relieved that I'll never have to make the decision again. Sidenote- my SIL, who is from the States but has lived in both Canada and the UK, told me that circumsism is not common like it is in the U.S in Canada or Europe...so what's the deal with it here in the U.S.?! Good luck!! You'll know what's best for you and your little boy.
One more thing- I felt encouraged by the fact that if- down the road- our son felt compelled to have the procedure he still could. And we would 100% support that.
My husband and i talked about it. My dad's family is Jewish and it took me awhile to realize how not ok this practice is. My husband said that he got that men did it for centuries in my culture but in his culture, women had to endure footbinding for centuries and that was certainly not ok either. Or that people declaw cats and that's certainly not ok either. He said no mutilating our kid for shallow standards and I agree completely.
I'm absolutely against enforcing it on our child. If he grows up and wants to have it done, that's fine by me.
And sorry to imply anything because that's not my intent but i've never met an uncircumcised man who can't keep his peen clean.
I didn't read through all the rest of the threads, but I thought that I would this one and respond because we are Jewish and we are practicing. That being said, obviously we would circumcise any child at eight days old which would be called his Bris.
Practice actually did emerge because of the fact that some men have problems fully pulling back their foreskin to clean underneath. Although, when done appropriately, it can be very easy to do so and not a problem. However, if you happen to not do it thoroughly and or cannot due to the inability for the foreskin to pull completely backwards, then you can end up with smegma TMI- aka penis cheese. Obviously, the vast majority of men do not have this problem, but if there is an issue retracting the foreskin fully then it is an issue. Also, many studies have shown that circumcision reduces the risk of transferring STDs and nevertheless, it is completely a personal decision. Only reason that I mention the difference between doing it at eight days of age and doing it later on in life is that a newborn won't remember it all. DH always says, it didn't hurt him at all! We do not consider it mutilation in anyway shape or form because it is not detracting from his ability to perform and/or enjoy sexual activities. Mutilating your body anyway is completely for bidden in Judaism. We cannot get tattoos (with the exception being for medical treatment or against our will.) so in Judaism, we take the philosophy that the body is a precious gift from G-d very strongly. So I respectfully disagree that it is mutilation. Though I do absolutely respect your position.
That being said, for us it is not a personal decision, it is a requirement and therefore any son that would be born to us would be circumcised.
I think it's a decision to be made by you and your husband. I'm not a circumcision nazi. I will not push you either way. My son is circumsized and if this one (I'm only 12 weeks ) is a boy, he will be too. The decision was made, as I said between my husband and I. My husband is circumsized, as is the other males in his family. All men in my family are as well. We are from the south (Texas) , So I don't know if that has anything to do with it.
We chose to do it before our little one left the hospital. About 30 min prior to the procedure, a very nice nurse came in and put a small ice pack looking thing that had numbing medicine in/on it. They came and took him down the hall. I never heard even a wimper. I didn't see the procedure. They brought him back 10 min later and he was fine, back to his normal self. We had the "bell" thing put on it. No problems with it, you clean around it and let it fall off. It fell off and nothing else has ever been an issue. He turns 2 on July 1st.
Everything that has to do with your child is between you and your husband. Whatever y'all choose is what's best for your child. If everyone would butt out of everyone else's baby business and just support each other this world would be a little bit better. Good luck!
I think it's a decision to be made by you and your husband. I'm not a circumcision nazi. I will not push you either way. My son is circumsized and if this one (I'm only 12 weeks ) is a boy, he will be too. The decision was made, as I said between my husband and I. My husband is circumsized, as is the other males in his family. All men in my family are as well. We are from the south (Texas) , So I don't know if that has anything to do with it.
We chose to do it before our little one left the hospital. About 30 min prior to the procedure, a very nice nurse came in and put a small ice pack looking thing that had numbing medicine in/on it. They came and took him down the hall. I never heard even a wimper. I didn't see the procedure. They brought him back 10 min later and he was fine, back to his normal self. We had the "bell" thing put on it. No problems with it, you clean around it and let it fall off. It fell off and nothing else has ever been an issue. He turns 2 on July 1st.
Everything that has to do with your child is between you and your husband. Whatever y'all choose is what's best for your child. If everyone would butt out of everyone else's baby business and just support each other this world would be a little bit better. Good luck!
Lol! I just find it to be funny that you chose to use the word not see in the second sentence following a post from somebody Jewish.
Re: Thoughts from mothers of sons on circumcision?
https://www.arclaw.org/resources/settlements
Here is an extensive list of lawsuits filed and won over the last 20 years in circumcision cases.
I've read a story about this in my 9th grade civics class. A woman spoke out and was interviewed saying that the night of her 13th birthday while she was sleeping she was tied to her bed and gagged while it was performed. She is from Africa, not sure of the part but this practice was just banned somewhere in Africa a few days ago which is great to hear.
You contradicted yourself with this statement. Removing sexual satisfaction.... What do you think you are doing to a little boy when your remove a piece of skin of his sex organ that contains thousands of nerve endings?
I in no way support circumcision for boys or girls but for the sake of the argument: they are circumcising little girls for a purpose, to maintain Virginity... What's the purpose for a little boy? Because we don't like the way it looks?
https://www.m.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/news/20141202/cdc-endorses-circumcision-for-health-reasons
I let MH make the call. Not the greatest reason, but we went with it. DS slept through it and was kind of fussy the rest of the day, but he did well. His Plastibell took the full 10 days to come off so the aftercare was a bit of a pain but nothing major.
All that being said, UpToDate had much to say about the benefits of the procedure and that many of the risks dealt with the actual procedure and not necessarily a physical/mental/emotional defect following it.
Once again, I stand by the thought that it is a personal decision....just make sure you are truly making an educated decision when/if you do.
Married 07/29/10 and blessed with our Baby Boy Bowen on 06/17/2013
If I recall correctly, CDC did not take a stance on it until 2014 like you mentioned. Maybe that means the evidence is becoming stronger in favor of it? Longitudinal studies take years, so I'm sure that's why there hasn't been much from them or other big organizations like them until more recently. <---I will likely get flamed for this statement...
And between potty training and changing clothes and showering, boys are pretty likely to see their father's penis at some point. How a father addresses if there is a difference is another issue.
I also think teaching kids about safe sex and having them get tested if they are sexually active will go far in preventing STIs.
Honestly I feel like if as a parent you are willing and able to teach your child how to clean themselves and practice safe sex when the time comes, circumcision won't be a problem. But again I am not a doctor so for the medical bit definitely talk to your doctor about the benefits of either way.
My point was that norms are obviously dependent on location. I thought it was interesting to see the difference between regions. I wasn't using it to influence anyone. Isn't it obvious that everyone on this thread has made up her mind? It's like beating a dead horse.
I think you'll get different opinions on this based in what country or section of the U.S. People live in. In my area not circumcising is becoming increasingly popular. I decided not to circumcise my son after doing a lot of research. I hadn't even thought about it until a friend told me one of her sons had a circumcision gone wrong. In the end, I decided not to put my newborn son through an elective procedure. I don't judge anyone who chooses to circumcise, but I feel that if we teach him how to keep it clean, being uncircumcised shouldn't affect his health. In terms of acceptance with future intimate partners, I think it will be much less taboo by then because many more people are choosing not to circumcise. I've also read that having the foreskin intact can increase sensation for both parties.
Good luck on your decision. And remember, it is yours and the baby's father's decision alone.
I refused to circumcise my children and after reading this I am glad I didn't! We are born with it for a reason
But when my son was born his balls were really swollen, I was told its common. Anyway the dr was like don't worry about the swelling in his testicles it will go away and it don't affect his ability to have children....
Ya know cause I was thinking about my 3hr old baby having children!!
The medical community will never take a side until the benefits obviously lean more toward one or the other. Until then it will remain the parents' choice. As long as you do so informed and commit to the care involved with either choice, I don't see an issue.
Practice actually did emerge because of the fact that some men have problems fully pulling back their foreskin to clean underneath. Although, when done appropriately, it can be very easy to do so and not a problem. However, if you happen to not do it thoroughly and or cannot due to the inability for the foreskin to pull completely backwards, then you can end up with smegma TMI- aka penis cheese. Obviously, the vast majority of men do not have this problem, but if there is an issue retracting the foreskin fully then it is an issue. Also, many studies have shown that circumcision reduces the risk of transferring STDs and nevertheless, it is completely a personal decision. Only reason that I mention the difference between doing it at eight days of age and doing it later on in life is that a newborn won't remember it all. DH always says, it didn't hurt him at all! We do not consider it mutilation in anyway shape or form because it is not detracting from his ability to perform and/or enjoy sexual activities. Mutilating your body anyway is completely for bidden in Judaism. We cannot get tattoos (with the exception being for medical treatment or against our will.) so in Judaism, we take the philosophy that the body is a precious gift from G-d very strongly. So I respectfully disagree that it is mutilation. Though I do absolutely respect your position.
That being said, for us it is not a personal decision, it is a requirement and therefore any son that would be born to us would be circumcised.
We chose to do it before our little one left the hospital. About 30 min prior to the procedure, a very nice nurse came in and put a small ice pack looking thing that had numbing medicine in/on it. They came and took him down the hall. I never heard even a wimper. I didn't see the procedure. They brought him back 10 min later and he was fine, back to his normal self.
We had the "bell" thing put on it. No problems with it, you clean around it and let it fall off. It fell off and nothing else has ever been an issue. He turns 2 on July 1st.
Everything that has to do with your child is between you and your husband. Whatever y'all choose is what's best for your child. If everyone would butt out of everyone else's baby business and just support each other this world would be a little bit better. Good luck!
Where is the child's right to freedom of religion?